I've overcome a lot of challenges, and have a strong educational background in psychology and communications. I believe that common sense and honesty are key to success in life -- and that most of us have common sense which we choose to ignore when making decisions.
Member Since: November 6, 2010 Answers: 36 Last Update: November 14, 2010 Visitors: 4025
Main Categories: Love Life General Sex Questions Etiquette View All
|
| |
so i wanted a second job to make some extra cash for the holidays. I love eating at applebees resturant and i would like to be a waitress.I just wanted to know how much a server can make in one week. I know it depends on where you live too. I live in New York City and the applebees that i wanted to work in is around times square which is a very busy area however i wanted to work the day time shift.
I would also like to know how much do you have to tip out to the bartender hostess and busser. can anyone help me. (link)
|
Waitstaff usually make minimum wage plus tips. The bartender, busser, and hostess generally each expect 5% of your tip take, but different restaurants have different policies -- sometimes the waitstaff take 10% off the top of everyone's tips, pool it, and distribute it to the other staff at the end of the night.
How much you make really depends on how many tables you turn on your shift. From my own time waiting tables, I would guesstimate that during a busy shift, you might turn 15 tables. Your average bill per table is likely to be at least $30. 15 tables x $30 is $450; if you figure an average 15% tip, that would give you $67.50. Take 15% off the top of that for staff tips, and you have $57.37. That's probably a worst-case estimate; most people I know tip 20%, and many bills will come to more than $30.
|
|
i want to remove all pimples from my face.and also i want my face to shine in a healthy way (link)
| |
Make sure you are drinking enough water -- at least 62 oz. per day. I didn't believe this either until I tried it, and 30 years of chronic skin trouble cleared up. I'd tried every prescription medication under the sun. Hydration works wonders for your skin.
|
|
im 17. im on birthcontrol althou for the past two months stupidly i havnt been taking them on time everyday. and because of that my period will come a week ahead. (i think so) last month my period first day came as brown and light. its annoying i thought its because i didnt take a pill one day out of the whole month. well needless to say when i fenally got red blood it was lighter than usual. this month i seriously would miss at least 2 pills every week i have no clue why i didnt mean to i just am very busy and tell myself oh ill take it when i get home and dont. FAIL! ugh. so i told my boyfriend that i missed and we used condoms. the rest of the time till i got my period. which happend firday that was light but ik it was there then like a day of brown and now i got a real one i have bad cramps that come and go like it would of course but the usually i would get A LOT of blood and i dont. the thing is in the back of my mind a little part of me wants a baby but listen i havnt done everything i wanted to in life yet hey i havnt even got really drunk before maybe not a great goal but how am i supposed to do things like that when im pregnant or have a baby. and im i know many girls around my age all want a baby KINDA!!! but really i dont. i might be freaking out but in these two months i threw up like once or tiwce randomly its just weird you know. if anyone has stories to tell me that relates to me right now please put me at ease that im not pregnant i feel stupid because i feel like i worry about being pregnant all the time b.c i have sex of course ill have the thought right before my period comes. but heres another thing every month before my period i get bloated and my boobs hurt and it hasnt, its really annoying to think this and have it on my mind. i hear that even when your on birthcontrol that you still get your "period" even if you are pregnant. and im not wasting my money on a test if im just not you know. (link)
|
If you're concerned, you should take a pregnancy test and get it over with, so you can put your mind at ease; there's really no other way to know for sure. If you have trouble remembering to take your pill, you might do better with a shot or implant. It's good that you're using condoms as a backup when you know you've missed a pill, but it sounds like daily pill-taking might not be the best fit for you. Remember too that vomiting and/or diarrhea can make the Pill ineffective, if the hormones are ejected from your system before they are absorbed.
As far as having a baby, bear in mind that you have your whole life ahead of you, and plenty of time to have a baby. That's not something you want to do until you are in a stable, supportive relationship where you feel emotionally secure and financially ready for a baby. Motherhood is a lifelong commitment, and you need to have some of your own life first.
|
I am a 43 year old mother of 3. 2 of whom are away in the military and one who is living with my fiancee and I as well as his 3 children. He also has one that is 20 who recently moved in with her mom.
When we first met, his children were running the household..There were bowls of stale milk, dirty dishes and clothes all over the house. There were kids coming and coming as well as boys in the girls rooms.
I have 3 children of my own and I refused to let them live like that..
His oldest hated her mother for leaving them and did nothing but, talk negatively about everyone in the family.
She did alot of things to cause problems in the house.
So, she decided to move in with her mom who signed over her rights as a mother and never paid a dime in child support or show up to any of the childrens functions.
Now the daughter is getting married at her mom's house and I feel that I am put in a very bad situation. I don't want to go. But, if I don't go I feel like it will cause problems with the family and if I do go I feel like I am saying that is okay for the way my fiancee and I have been treated..
I need help because I have lost alot of respect for my fiancee and children when all I wanted to do was make our home a home and have some sort of relationship with everyone..
(link)
|
Loss of respect for your partner is a pretty big red flag in any relationship. It's important for heads of household in blended families to agree on rules and standards which will apply to all people living in the same household.
However, the oldest child is twenty -- she is a young adult, not a child, and she is of legal age to make her own decisions. Going to her wedding is not a tacit acceptance of how she behaved to you personally; it is an acknowledgment and support of her decision to marry. If you do not support or respect that decision, then you may not wish to attend. But it is probably a mistake to confuse the issue of how she behaved in your home with the issue of her marriage.
You and your fiance may find it beneficial to look into counseling to try to resolve some of the blended family issues. If private counseling is too expensive, you may be able to find a community or church support group in your area.
|
|
Ok! So I'm a junior and i like this freshman kid (please, no comment!. I didn't really like him until I started thinking he liked me. Of course, now that I do, I'm not sure if he likes me or not! I know this is very juvenile, but when we're on facebook chat he never says hi, and I texted him one time and he said gave be an enthusiastic hi but then that he was busy and he never texted me after that. Is that a definite no (that he doesn't like me)- should i try and get over him? I just dont know because he flirts with me like crazy in person...So frustrating! (link)
| |
If you didn't think you liked him until you thought he liked you ... it sounds more as if you're interested in the attention than in him personally. Your energies might be better directed toward someone you're sure you like, whom you know a little better, and whom you have things in common with. If he's sending mixed messages, don't waste your time playing games ... it's not worth it. Move on.
|
|
I'm fifteen, sophomore. It's been five months since me and this guy I dated for seven months broke up. He was my first boyfriend, first kiss, fingering, hj, and bj... It was a really unhealthy relationship and a super long story but to sum it all up, he really hurt me. He became sooo much a part of me that when we broke up I felt like I had nothing to distinguish myself with anymore. Even now, he doesn't even feel like a person to me, more like a whole part of myself. But its an empty space... We don't talk. Hang out. Nothing. But I still think about him every single day. I sometimes still cry over him... It's just wierd. Because even thoguh I hate him for all the pain and betrayl he put me through I miss him like crazy. And I feel like a different person now that he's gone... And I hate it. I want it to go away SO bad. I just don't understand. It took him days to move on. It's been five months and I'm still hurting. Whats wrong with me?? (link)
| |
Boys often seem to move on more quickly than girls -- and it's also true that a first breakup is very difficult. You might consider investing more in yourself, and who you are, and less in the idea of this lost relationship. What do you like to do? What are you good at? Focus on developing those interests and talents, and you may find you feel less empty, or at least that you have a productive distraction from missing your ex.
|
17/f
My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 20 months now. We havent had sex yet, but we have been talking about it recently. I love him to death but I am really upset right now and am not sure how to talk to him about it.
More or less, our relationship is great. Hes everything I could ever want. However, it seems whenever he goes out with a few certain friends that he does whatever he can to upset me. Last night, as a joke he randomly texted me (after not talking to me all day) "So Im going to go get drunk with A and B and go to a strip club. Love you. Bye" Hes just started university so I understand he may want to try new things (drinking is fairly new to him too) but I was just a little hurt by the blatant wording. A half an hour later he told me it was a joke, but by that point I was already a little upset, and I feel bad for getting so upset over something so stupid.
Then around 1am, I get a message saying that he was sorry he couldnt talk at all cause he was playing video games and watching movies with his friends. I was a little annoyed, being woken up for that, and replied back that i understand but with some sarcasm.
He then swore and said he fucked up enough tonight. I was kind of confused, and just asked if he was simply refering to the lack of communication and the mean joke. All he replied was "Ive been a terrible boyfriend tonight..." So I asked him again, and for the next 3 hours I pretty much ended up being worried and upset, asking him to explain. Everytime he did text me back (about once an hour) he sort of changed the subject.
I love him, and I very much doubt he cheated on me or anything. Im more hurt that he could tell I was upset and scared and seemed completely unphased and couldnt be bothered to tell me he just meant cause of the joke and such. I feel asleep around 4am or so, I didnt really hear from him after about 3am, and I told him to let me know when hes awake so I can call him.
I dont want to get into a fight, we dont fight very often, but Im just really angry that he let me stay up and be upset for so long and still hasnt answered my question. How do I tell him this without getting into a fight? I just feel as if when hes with those friends, he tries to say things to upset me, and its getting to the point I really cant take it.
Sorry if this sounded really stupid and childish, I just dont know what to say to him...
Thank You (link)
|
The way to talk to him about it ... is to talk to him about it. I know it's hard, but since this is obviously bothering you, you should speak to him about it in a calm, non-confrontational way. You don't have to pick a fight with him, and you don't have to create drama. If this were me, I would say (IN PERSON, not via text): "Hey, you know the other night when you texted me to say you'd been a really bad boyfriend? That confused me; I didn't know what you meant, and I'd like to understand what you were trying to tell me. Can you tell me more about that?"
You don't have to be accusatory; you don't have to make him feel like he's walking into a minefield. But you do deserve an explanation.
It also sounds as if the friends he's with aren't the greatest influence on him, and it seems to me that the texts he sends you are confessional in nature rather than a deliberate attempt to upset you. However, if you are feeling that you are reluctant to trust him, and that he may be seeking new and different experiences which will negatively affect your relationship, please don't start a sexual relationship. That will make it more confusing for you, and harder to end the relationship if it becomes clear that he's not a good emotional investment. You need to be sure you are standing on solid ground before you take that next step. And that means initiating a conversation with him about your concerns. His response will tell you a lot about who he is. If he belittles you, or doesn't take your concerns seriously, you need to consider what you're getting from the relationship. You're only 17, and you have your whole life ahead of you. Don't make the mistake of getting further involved with a guy if he doesn't respect your feelings.
|
|
so me and my boyfriend have been having sex and i like im a lot and i want it to be good so what would be some great ways to turn him on i mean i don't want him to get bored or anything so like foreplay? people told me to just ask him what turns him on but that would be a bit awkward so any tips? (link)
| |
Really, asking him is the best way to find out. Not, like, asking for a list. :-) You can, for example, try something in bed, and ask whether he likes it... and depending on his response, you could say, "What else do you like?" or "What else could I try?"
|
|
if u like this boy and crushing hym hard and looking forward to having a relationship with hym how do u kno he feeling the same way? (link)
| |
There's no way to know unless you ask him. However, you can look for hints that he is interested in you. Does he talk to you? Flirt with you? Go out of his way to see you or speak to you? If he does, he probably likes you, too.
|
17/f
its my senior year, it would have been our one year on october 13th... (hes 18 graduated last year) basically he left me for another girl this september.. & she didnt want him. he came back to me, and i am deeply in love with him.. took him back. things are just different, we got into a deep conversation the other day, he said "were not going to last when you go to college anyways" .. i said "what am i doing with us then?" and he said "were just having a good time untill then" like are you kidding me.. at that moment i ended it. HONESTly i love this boy but am i right or am i wrong. Its hard cause my mind says im right but my heart screams his name and it echos inside me (link)
| |
Your mind is right. It is very hard to listen to the good judgment of your head when your heart is involved, but in the long run, you will be glad you did. This boy already betrayed you once -- why would you let him do it again? He clearly doesn't have much respect for you, and just wants "a good time." You have the choice to respect yourself, and tell him to have a good time elsewhere. Your instinct is correct. Let him go, and know that there are better things in your future.
|
15f
I have a HUGE crush on this guy but he's gay is it possible to turn a gay guy staight and if so how? (link)
| |
No, it is not possible. If you know for sure he is gay, you need to let it go, and try to move on; there is no future for you with him. Crushes pass. You might consider asking yourself whether you tend to be attracted to guys whom you know are unavailable, and pay attention to that pattern if it exists in your life.
|
My boyfriend is in the marine corps and is at parris island boot camp right now. His parents refuse to pay for car insurance so he never got his license. When he gets out of boot camp he need to get insurance so he can come visit me in college. I hear that car insurance is like $1000 a month...which will pretty much be his entire pay check... I don't know what we can do about this situation. I'm afraid he'll never be able to visit me unless he takes a plane each time. Any advice?
btw he is 18 (link)
| |
Rather than asking this question here, why the hell wouldn't you call an insurance agent? They'll talk to you for free, and give you actual accurate information.
|
Since almost 2 weeks ago, I'm am experiencing some kind of on-and-off soreness on my bottom left groin/thigh area (possibly where my left pelvis is located at). Sometimes, I can only feel it when I started walking on it. There is no swelling or discoloring at all around my crotch. I am currently wearing a stretch bandage to ease the tension for walking. I'm not sure if my condition happens to be a muscular problem, bone problem, folliculitis, etc. I'm not sure if the condition that I have is serious or not. What am I deal with? Should I see a doctor?
(link)
| |
Your pelvis is probably misaligned, and it can be easily fixed by a physical therapist. I'd advise going straight to a good PT rather than seeing your doctor first, as a PT can do the adjustment for you, and your doctor is less likely to be able to do it in his office. The PT can also give you exercises to stabilize the position of the pelvis so it is less likely to slip or tilt.
|
|
Do I spit or swallow? (link)
| |
It doesn't matter what he prefers; it matters what you prefer. This is a very personal decision for any woman; if you don't want to swallow, then don't. Frankly, if you don't want him to ejaculate in your mouth, that's fine too. You can tell when he is about to ejaculate from the pulsing of the shaft, and you can move out of the way at the last minute. By the time he's started, it doesn't make a difference to him, sensation-wise, whether he comes into your mouth or into a wet towel.
|
|
My girlfriend and I have been dating for 8 months. She's a nice girl but I don't have those feelings of love for her. I've been trying to wait it out, thinking that I'd start to feel the magic sometime, but it ain't happening. She's really into me and I'm just not into her. She's nice and all but that's about it. How can I dump my girlfriend without hurting her? I know I need to let my girlfriend down easy but how? (link)
| |
Perhaps not using the word "dump," even to yourself, would help. You are not dumping her; you are making a realistic assessment of the relationship so you can both move on to better things. There is no way to do this without hurting her, but it's better to do it now than to continue in a situation you know you can't sustain. Be straightforward; don't make excuses, and tell her you want her to be free to find the right relationship. Make sure she knows you are concerned about her happiness as well as your own.
|
|
I'm just curious, how do you know that birth control is working on you, and how do you know it failed?? (link)
| |
The Pill works by stopping ovulation; one way to check whether you are ovulating is to pay attention to the consistency of your vaginal mucous. When you ovulate, it has a stringy, sticky consistency ... you can stretch it between your fingers. This is something you can easily check for. However, if you are worried about the Pill not being effective, I would recommend that you also use a backup method, such as contraceptive film or foam, which is affordable, and less intrusive than a condom. Better safe than sorry.
|
|