Do you want my opinionated truth? Feel free to ask me a question! I'll tell you exactly what I think.
Website: Myspace
E-mail: sp4rklingr4in@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: California
Occupation: Professional Gambler/Student
AIM: chiefhoohaha
Member Since: March 10, 2004
Answers: 397
Last Update: October 3, 2006
Visitors: 19590
Favorite Columnists
mtnhouse
waterrabbit1104
S0RD
|
| |
Ever since I was little I couldn't talk to people I didn't know. When I became older, I started having the same problem with girls. I had a few girlfriends early in high school, but they asked me. They weren't really my type either. They always wanted to party and do drugs. I didn't. I guess that I am the last of a dying breed. My freshman dance was 2 years ago and I didn't even think about going because I was to shy to ask anyone. I always use the excuse that I have a rejection phobia. I am the person that you see at a party that is hanging out with with his friends because no one likes talks either. I can't just go up to a girl and say, hey do you want to go and see a movie this weekend or something. I used to be fat through elementary school and 7 and 8 grade. Then I went to the gym and I went from 250lbs to 180lbs. I am 6'1 so this weight is better. Even though I look better I still don't have the courage to talk to girls. I always think that if I ask them, after they turn me down that they will go off and blab to their friends and make fun of me. I have asked a couple of girls out and they say that they like me as a friend or that they don't have time for a boyfriend and then a couple days later someone else asks them out and they say yes. This year the prom is fast approaching and I didn't ask anyone. Someone tell me how to get over this. I am 17. I don't play sports, maybe thats why. Girls want sports guys. And I don't hang out with the popular crowd because they are too fake. Help.
(link)
| |
Don't be too shy. I know that you don't like to talk to girls too often, but if you are quiet and shy you will get more bs from girls than if you just go and talk to them. Don't try to rush relationships; make sure that you are good friends with a girl before you run into asking them out. Don't worry about getting rejected either. Dances are all about having fun. Just ask them to go as a friend and when you finally do get to the dance (or movie etc), make sure you hang around them. Don't always go running to your friends. I don't think that playing sports is really that important, but if you think that it will make girls like you then you should play in an outside sports league with friends.
|
Yo,
I have question and you may think that it is the same ol thing but i need anvice!
This "guy" that i crushed on for like 3 years and i finally got the guts to tell him he told me that he doesn't like me. well i lived but its like now i act like he is an idiot and stuff. but now he seems to be the one watching me and like he is really weird around me. he seems to stare at me when he thinks im not looking and stuff. see i know guyz send mixed signals cause this guy did it to me for 3 years. i don't know if he likes me now that im acting like i don't like him. the other problem is my best friend has a crush on him now and we are very honest with each other and i've told her that he is all hers but still like him. and i don't want him to end up liking her instead of me. so ya see my prob? im confused!
please give some advice!
(link)
| |
Boys are stupid. Just drop the whole thing because I've seen a situation similar to this. You two will somewhat "fight" over him even though you will both stay friends but when he finally chooses one of you, whichever one of you he doesn't choose will have their hearts crushed. If you aren't willing to take a risk then just move on. A guy showing mixed feelings obviously doesn't know what he's doing. The thing that you definately don't want to do is harm your friendship between you and your gal friend.
|
|
There is this boy in school that I live.He loves me back,but here's the problem.There is another girl in school he loves(she loves him back,too).Even though he said he loves me more,I am still worried that he will dump me 4 her.What do i do?I can't help but 2 love him!! (link)
| |
If he really "loves" you then he wouldn't "love" someone else. If you fear that he will dump you then I guess it isn't true love. How can you expect to trust him if you can't even trust him with your own relationship?
|
|
I'm gay, is that bad? (link)
| |
Not at all. Many gay people are the happiest people on earth thus they are called "gay". Don't worry so much about what other people think because in the end it really doesn't matter.
|
|
I asked this guy named sean out and he didnt answer so just the other day i wrote him a note and it said "do u have a answer?" and she still didnt answer but everyone is telling me that he dosnt want to go out with me. i think i am in luv wut should i do? p.s. i told him i felt realli comfortable around him. but i try to avoid him each time i see him iz there something wrong with me? other ppl say we look realli good together should i just go and tell him again how i feel? (link)
| |
Well, if you can't express your true feelings for Sean then how do you expect to get a relationship out of him? Also, it's not always the best idea to ask someone out via email or AIM because you might as well just ask him in person. If you can't ask him in person then it's probably best to overcome your shyness towards Sean before you consider going into a relationship with him.
|
ive been having alot of trouble with my girlfriend lately.... we always fight.. what can i do to stop this?? please help!
-BKN
=P (link)
| |
If you really have trouble with your girlfriend then all I can say is that you should show your love toward her more openly. If you and her always fight then perhaps you should consider sitting down and talking about your true feelings for one another. Find out what's going on because you're going to hurt your relationship really badly if you don't.
|
|
I have this really annoying cousin that bugs me all the time and wants to go places with me everywhere i go! shes friends with my gf too so i cant do anything.... please tell me how i can get rid of her THANKS (link)
| |
Give your cousin a million dollars and she may consider going away. You never know ;)
|
|
I think utada is the best...... but then departure is also good..... which did u think is better?? (link)
| |
I personally think that Utada is better... departure is just another random song that will never shatter the earth as utada had done in her prime years.
|
|
She is 4 and she almost always wants to pretend to be a cartoon character, and wants me to be one too. Sometimes, I just am not in the mood to be a cartoon character and talk in a silly voice. I already told her I won't do it in public, and she understands, but she still bugs me to be characters at home. How do I get her to stop this, or at least not expect me to play along with it every time? It's getting old. Does anyone else have kids that do this? (link)
| |
Try to get you daughter interested in other things. If she wants to be a cartoon character to omuch then maybe you should consider taking away some TV hours so she won't look to made-up people as her idols. Other than that, just continue to play with her. You're probably the most important thing in the world to her.
|
|
my son and his cousin are both 3 and all his cousin ever does is bite and scram his face, he looks like hes been attacked by a cat! as soon as the old wounds are healed new ones appear, its really annoying me now, ive tried to separate them but its hard as his mother works full time and i look after him, ive now told my son to hit back as hes a very big boy for his age and mayby he wouldnt do it if he hurts him back, what do you suggest (link)
| |
Yes, teach your son to hit back. That's a good thing. If he doesn't learn how to defend himself now then he will be a whimp later. Other than that, I would advise you to have a talk with your nephews.
|
i have this friend... let's call him Duckie. well he recently began to date my other friend, (we'll just call her Juicyfruit). as foolish as it sounds, i would do anything to make someone else happy. and so i helped them set things straight and get going on a healthy relationship. but Duckie is my best guy friend in the whole world and i hug him every day when i see him between classes.
Juicyfruit is a jealous girl. she sent her other friend to set some "ground rules" for me. it was stated that i am not allowed to hug Duckie anymore unless Juicyfruit gives her consent. so i did what i thought was right and i confronted her. she said that she was sorry for losing her temper, and just to forget that she even cared about the hugging thing. in other words, she was pissed.
Juicyfruit is a sort of a player and Duckie might be able to make her stick with him so she can actually feel love. and jealousy would interfere with their own joy. i wrote a letter to Duckie telling him he was not to hug me, speak to me, or even look at me because i only cause trouble.
so i did what probably makes them happy. but after losing my best friend and having Juicyfruit's popular little friends look down on me with scorn, what do i do when i have made two people happy... but I'M not in the same bliss?
someone help me. i don't want to be selfish. all i ever wanted to do was make people happy. but i'm too STUPID to know if this has gone too far. (link)
| |
Try to reach an agreement between you and Juicyfruit about your friend Duckie. She may just be frightened that you are trying to steal him away from her. Make sure that she knows your true feelings toward Duckie and maybe she will better understand your intentions. Don't lose touch with Duckie just because Juicyfruit tells you that you can't see him anymore. No one should tell you who can and can't be friends with. Just make sure that next time you're with him that you don't act flirty or anything that would make it seem like you're trying to steal Juicyfruit's boyfriend.
|
|
I want a dog, but my 'rents say i cant...WHY NOT (link)
| |
Dogs can be noisy, hard to take care of, smelly, and very annoying if you get jaded by them. I advise you not to get a dog if you don't think that you can handle the responsibility. You have to walk them, clean up their poop, train them to be a "good dog" and also go through hours of playing with them every day. Don't waste your parents' money if you aren't willing to do even one of these things.
|
|
whats a vibrator? (link)
| |
you don't really need to know...
|
|
Awhile back my friend Jill invited Jane to her birthday party. I didn't really like Jane at all but I didn't tell Jill or anything because she's allowed to like whoever she wants to. Now I am friends with Jane because we both play on club volleyball team together and it to Jill and my other friend Susie who don't like Jane at all. I like them all and I'm not going to ruin any friendships with anyone but what is a good way to talk to both Jane and Jill and Susie and what should I say? (link)
| |
Let each one know how great you think the other is. There is a difference between "not liking" and "hating" someone. If your friend Susie doesn't like Jane then either try to get them to become friends or not mention them around one another. The best way that this could work out is if you could possibly all become friends. First impressions aren't always reliable. Make sure your friend Suzie is aware of this.
|
|
what is a pyro???????????? (link)
| |
someone who enjoys catching things on fire and is obsessed by fire.
|
have question.
Is it wrong to expect a B-day party?
I am not someone that is selfish or anything of the sort but I dont know. on tuesday i will be turning 14 and i won't even be getting a cake let alone gifts. now my mother is poor and we don't have alot of money so this is the reason im feeling selfish thinking this. i have a cousin that turned 8 today and the had this HUGE bash infact they have had a big bash everyyear of her life but its like im to "OLD" now and no one thinks of me. i feel like im being selfish but yet i really would like to have something to look back on. turning 14 is something big for me cause turning 14 means being "more" of an adult now. another thing that is this i big to me is because i have never had a b=day party in my life. yeah if you count my aunt, grandmother, and 1 of my 2 sisters. my mom says oh, just wait till your sweet sixteen. yeah well she told me that when i turned 12 that i could have a big party when i turn 13 or 14, well i just feel like a big baby that wants gifts. i don't even care about the gifts its just that i feel as if no one even thinks about me. i just would like to have one day to myself for me instead always being the one everyone turns to. i have had 1 person send me a b-day card. i know i sound like a big selfish baby but i guess i need some advice.
sincerely
B-day party blues (link)
| |
Don't worry about it. Even though birthday parties are fun and all, you'll get jaded by most of the presents and party activities. Just be sure to have fun with your friends and you will have a great birthday party no matter what kind of presents or cake it's lacking.
|
I have an.. well interesting sister. She is 4 years older than I am and I am nearly 18. My sister and I both live at home still. My sister acts as if her life is the most important life on the face of the earth, and she treats everyone around her like a lesser being. Sometimes I just want to physically hurt her because words just never get through to her, that is, if you can words out at all. She never lets people speak, especially when she is angry. She blames her problems on everyone else in my family, especially my mother and I'm starting to believe my sister is really breaking my moms heart to pieces. Her actions and words hurt all of my immediate family and it is so extremely peaceful and quiet when she is at work.
The thing that bothers me the most is that she always claims that her life is so much worse than everyone else's, no matter what they are enduring, she refuses to offer support, instead she will explain how much more difficult it is to be her. I can't stand being around her because she always insults me, she claims that she is just being honest when clearly - she is just being rude.
I had hoped she would be moving out soon but she enrolled in school again and so she will be staying at home for at least another 2 years. Its madness and I simply can't be around her.
When I have tried to explain how I feel and how badly she treats us she refuses to let me finish and assumes I am attacking her and she responds with attacks of her own. She always tells us how horrible it is to have a family like ours and how no one cares about her and how she wishes she could leave.
I have tried to tolerate her disgusting attitude and no one outside my family can understand my grief over this issue because my sister changes her entire self when she is around anyone other than our immediate family - she is suddenly nice. Therefore, no one else understands.
My question to advicenators is this - is there anything that I can say to my sister that will make her realize how bad she is hurting our family or do we all need to simply tough it out for the next few years until she moves out on her own?
However, even if we do tolerate her, I don't ever want to simply sever ties with my own sister - I want her to care about us and love us - I want her to be a friend to me. Not someone that hates us and supposedly makes her life horrible. (link)
| |
Many people are just like that. There's nothing that you can do to make them change without putting your own feelings in danger. She's 22, she should be leaving you soon. Just try to ignore her actions. You've put up with her for your whole life, just live with her a little longer. She's your sister. You know that you love her deep inside.
|
|
when can u tell the difference between 'love' and 'friendship' and how do u know if they like u in that way or not? (link)
| |
You will never truly know how another person feels no matter how well you know them or no matter how close you two are. All love develops from friendship and all frienship needs love in order to really be a good friendship. If you really want to know how someone feels about you then start making some moves and see how they react to them. If you don't take some risks then you will be left with "why"s and "what if"s.
|
if guys like u how would u know, or can tell? and well they try to make u jealous by hanging around with other girls.
if someone likes u wat are they going to act like with u and how would u know!! (link)
| |
Many guys are difficult to understand as girls are. Don't try to compare their situations to yours because most guys think completely different than us girls. If you really want to find out then start making some moves. Most guys like it when you do that anyways.
|
|
I never really have any good feelings- i'm always either depressed, bored, sad or apathetic. Haven't felt happy or even angry in AGES, and am sick of it. Could this be because i got less naive (i found out how much the world sucks, etc, after finding out my mom committed suicide and my friend was molested). Also, how do i END this annoying similarity of my feelings.days, etc? I've been kinda contemplating suicide, but only jokingly. masturbation doesn't work either- makes me more depressed. i like art but when i'm at art school i feel calm, not really happy though. When i laugh at a joke i get this .5 second uplift in spirits but then become sardonic and dark all over again. Any advice would be appreciated. (link)
| |
I know that depression really hurts and makes you spin down a never ending hole where you can never seem to get any happier. Something that really helps is to try to act happy even if you're not REALLY happy. Don't let your sorrow show on the outside and you will start to fool some people; maybe even yourself. Eventually, this feeling will become natural. Forget about the past. It's in the past, there's nothing that you can do about it anymore. Don't go searching for sympathy, it just annoys people. Just take care of yourself and do pleasurable things that won't harm you or others.
|
|