about

Hey kids! My name is Amanda, but call me Manders. I'm a psychology/neuroscience/biology student. Throw me questions and I'll throw you an answer. :)

advice

lets call the kids jack and jill.

so ive been babysitting jack and jill every other weekend. jill is really good and sweet but jack is not. now there mom wants me to watch them everyday in the summer. and i dont want to! im only 14 i have a life! but their mom is really pushy and in your face.

what should i do?

It's not like you have to do it. Tell her that you're only available for a few days, or just tell her no, you're busy all Summer. If her mom keeps being pushy, just say you have to leave in a nice, believable way (Ex: My mom said I had to be home soon). You can't let this woman walk all over you. I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, leave one in my inbox!
*Manders*

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some of the girls in my school like gettin called a tease. and others dont i am so confused by this that i want to know if its a goodthing being called a tease and wat it exactly means


x0 thanx 4 da help

A tease is someone who acts all flirty around a guy, but not in an "innocent" way. They say things sexual to the guy. And it's all talk, and the girl never does anything with the guy she's "teasing."

No, it's not a good thing to be called, since it usually gives the person a bad reputation and rumors usually get started.

I hope I helped and if you have any more questions, just leave one in my inbox!
*Manders*

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Here is the thing, I have been a dancer for this is my 11th year. Ive been dancing at the same studio all my life and ive grown to know and love the place and the people associated with it. But there was a fire a few months ago in a building in the same plaza. Now the ceiling of the studio needs to be taken off. Now my teacher is looking for a new place to go. She found something but it requires fixing up and whatnot. Bottom line: What are some good, ORIGINAL, fundraisers we could do? Not selling candy bars. xO ali (toxic x babii x3)

Maybe you could get some experienced dancers (like yourself) together and have a dance lesson for younger, less experienced dancers who need help. You can have one lesson, or you can have a few lessons, like a day camp, for a week or so. To do that though, you would need to get a place to meet. Someone's house, maybe?

Got a talent show coming up anytime soon in your area? Some talent shows have money prizes, and maybe you and some other girls could get together, make up a routine and compete in the show.

You could also make things (cute keychains, necklaces, bracelets, etc) and sell them. Make sure you let everyone know that their money is going to a good cause!

You can also have a garage sale. Make sure someone has a garage (or yard) you can use. Ask everyone to pitch in some items that they don't need. Put an ad in the paper, and there you go! You could also use the previous idea (making things) at the garage sale too! You could also sell doughnuts (garage sales are usually in the morning), coffee, soda, etc at the garage sale, too. Since parents usually bring their kids to garage sales, maybe you can have someone face paint.

I hope I helped and if you have any more questions, leave one in my inbox!
*Manders*

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I can tell I'm starting to get a cold, and I'm going away in a week for a couple days. I don't want to be sick while I'm away (I'm going to a conference thing) and I was wondering if there's any way I could fight this cold off before Thursday.

Thanks!

Take some cold medicine ASAP! It's always better to get rid of a cold in the beginning of it. It will go away faster that way. Also, drink a lot of fluids. Eat and drink stuff with Vitamin C in it, like orange juice. And of course, get plenty of rest. And don't forget to stock up on tissues. I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, leave one in my inbox!
*Manders*

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hey okay see the reason we broke up me and jeremy b/c i cheted on him with michael and he jeremy said he forgave me but he wanted to get back with me and then he says no he doesnt that was a week ago he hads me waiting for 2 days and i feel really bad what i did nobody knows how i feel and i still love him and i just cant break up with michael b/c it would hurt his feelings and stuff like that i am so confuse should i go with jeremy again if he askes me back out or stay with micahel and just try and get over jerem. i dont want to get over him though i am in class right now in computer and he keeps staring at me anyways i sure like the advice you give me can you help me again on this plz
punkbaby69 here
Holla atcha

Hey! I'm glad you liked the advice I gave you. Here's the advice for this question:
You have to talk to Jeremy again. He needs to make up his mind about getting back together or not. You have to promise him (and keep this promise) that you will not cheat on him. Trust is hard to earn back, and it may take time, so be patient.
About Michael... I still think that you need to break up with him. I know it will hurt him, but it has to be done. Like I said, you should only be in a relationship with someone if you truly have feelings for them, and you don't seem to care for Michael much. It will hurt Michael more if you stay with him pretending to like him, than if you just end it now. In the long run, Michael will be happier and can one day be with someone that truly likes him. Good luck!

I hope I helped, and if you have another question, feel free to ask!
*Manders*

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see i have a friend he likes every girl in my class and school hes a perv and he is a guy that got alot of girls but now hes horny and he slaps girls sexually and is despirate to get a girl so what should i tell him i told him only like 1 girl but that didnt work stop being horny and stop wrongfully touching them

You should tell him how bad he's being. This guy is obviously immature. And I doubt that these girls are okay with his touching. Tell him to stop, in a calm way. Tell him that what he's doing isn't right. If he doesn't stop, you need to tell an adult (guidance counselor, teacher, or a school cop, if you have one). If he's touching a girl without their permission, it's sexual harassment and it's serious. I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, feel free to ask.
*Manders*

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I have been feeling like I'm ugly,fat, and that nobody likes me. I have a little poll in my profile for AIM and its like Am I Ugly? The Majority said I was pretty but when I looked who picked what Drew(the guy I used to like and hes kinda my friend) said I was Ugly. And My Friend Emmie said I was ugly too....And all of these people that aren't my friends said I was pretty....but anyways after Drew said that I was ugly I have just been feeling really bad about myself....I'm not sure why either because I have realized not to care about what other people think but now I just can't help it...Does anyone have some suggestions on what I should do to help me feel better or might know why I am feeling this way? I rate high and leave comments if your going to say something mean please don't say anything at all!

I think that you should take the poll off of AIM, for one. People are mean online because they don't realize what they're doing is bad, since they aren't doing or saying anything to you in person. The Drew and Emmie people seem like horrible friends. I would forget them. But if you think you would forgive them, then talk to them about it. Tell them that you're hurt and let them know what they did was wrong and sure not friend-like.

And you are pretty, and don't let people tell you different! If you have any more questions, leave one in my inbox. I hope I helped!
+{Manders}+

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I moved here in 6th grade and I've always wanted to be popular...So I tried hanging with the white popular people and it seriously was HARD work!! Each year, things got better..and now I'm at that point where we'd be better friends if I'd invite them over (I haven't invited them over yet because I'm embaress that they will say that my house is small compared to theres..or that they will make fun of my lifestyle..and everything) I'm now in 11th grade..and I really want to be friends with these people..I don't think I can keep a close relationship with them if I never invite them over...I'm just very embaressed of the way I live...Compared to them, I'm so much uglier and poorer..and they're rich...Please don't judge..Thanks

I think that you should invite them over. If these people are true friends, they won't make fun of your lifestyle or any of that. If they do, they aren't worth you time, since you deserve better than that. And you are beautiful and don't let anyone tell you different!! Be confident! I hope I helped, and if you have anything else to ask, leave it in my inbox.
*Manders*

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Is it possible to be in love when your 13? Im turning 14 in July but still....his mom wont let him date until like a 'year down the road" (thats what she told me) and we are both willing to wait until his mom 'allows' him to date....ive never liked somebody so much in my life! And hes not even the hottest thing in the world hes the sweetest, funniest, adorablest guy in the world....and ive NEVER felt this way about ANYBODY....i LoVe him....but still is it possible to fall in love when your 13?

I guess you can fall in love at 13, but I highly doubt it. For example: I liked my now ex-boyfriend so much... (I was close to your age when this happened) we even told each other that we loved each other. But then he broke up with me. After about a month or so of sadness, I realized that I didn't love him, but I was in more of a "strong like." So, it really depends. You have to follow your heart, and no one on this advice website can tell you how. But there is a difference between liking someone a lot and loving them. It's up to you to figure out if you like him or love him. I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, leave one in my inbox!
*Manders*

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(13/f)
I was talking to this girl from my class on the phone today and I realized that she is pretty cool and I want to be friends with her. The thing is that she is not very popular and I'm afraid that if I start hanging out with her, my other friends won't want to hang with me and might diss me. Am I being shallow or stupid? And what should I do?

Be friends with whoever you want. Don't not like somebody because of "no popularity" because it's not a good or nice way to judge somebody. Being judged because of lack of popularity hurts, so don't do that to her. Be friends with this girl. If your friends are really friends, they would let you hang out with whoever you want to. If they diss you, they aren't real friends. I hope I helped and if you need more help, leave a question in my inbox!
*Manders*

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I have a really great singing voice, but I'm so embarassed to sing in front of anyone, even my mom. Can someone please give me tips to overcome my shyness? I RATE HIGH. Someone pelase help

I'm a singer too, and I have the same problem. This works if you're making any kind of presentation like this: Always look at a wall behind a person's head. You still need to look around, so you don't look like like you're actually focusing on the wall, or the person. Just don't look into anyone's eyes, since that's how most people get nervous. And most of all, do NOT imagine the audience in their underwear (Seriously, I'm not joking. I've heard stories where people laughed right during their performance while they did that.) I hope I helped! Leave a question in my inbox if you have any more questions!
*Manders*

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I am attracted to guys but there are these two women i am too. One is my moms friend who is 42 and her daughter who is 17. I like them a lot like more than friends and im only 13. After i stop liking these two girls i dont think i will like any others. After thse two im back to guys 100%. Am i bi?

You might be bi, but I'm not so sure if you are or not. Have you had feelings like this about women before? If so, then you might be bi. If not, maybe you love these two women like sisters or like best friends, not "love" love. I'm not sure since I'm not you, and I can't feel what you feel. I hope I helped, and leave a message in my inbox if you have any more questions!
*Manders*

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i am a 13 year old female and are kid size bottoms and junoirs size tops i am going to a party on april 30 and need some cute clothes for it i am a very girly cheerleader and dancer so i love pink

please help!!!!!

Some good stores to shop at that you might like, based on what you've told me about your personality:
American Eagle
Abercrombie (For the kid-size bottoms)
Old Navy
Aeropostale
Delia's
JC Penny (They have adorable tops)
Macy's (They have a large selection of junior's clothes)
Pacsun

That's all I can think of... if you have any more questions, just ask! I hope I helped!
*Manders*

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My friend's b-day party is on Saturday. I also have a very important softball practice that same day. They are both at the same time. I

I think you could do both. If the party is longer than the practice, then go to the whole practice and go to the remainder of the time at the party (Or vice versa). But if the practice is REALLY important, maybe you could go to that and maybe sometime later you can hang out at your house with just the two of you so you can still spend time with her on her b-day. I hope I helped and ask me anything else if you need to!
*Manders*

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ok ther is aguy at skool and we r friends.. he is always tells me thing that he doesnt tell other people ... and same thing i can tell him stuff like that to.. and we always talk on the fone 24/7..... and we always flirt .. i dont kno if he likes me .. i really do and how can i find out??
.....
??

Well let's see... you guys already seem pretty close, and from what you've said here, there's a pretty good chance he feels the same way you do. Ask him to go to a movie or to lunch. Maybe you two can go alone, or you can go in a group of people. I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions just ask!
*Manders*

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Ok well im bi and my friend is freeking out about it and he is going to tell my parents and if they find out they will freek out and i dont know what to do cause he is really serious about this and i need help

If this person is a true friend, they wouldn't tell. Especially if you told him not to tell. Talk to him about it. If he is still going to tell, then I would reconsider your friendship.
Plus, I think it would be better for your parents to find out from you that you are bi, not from your friend. I hope I helped and feel free to ask anything else!
*Manders*

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ok well i got fish along time ago..and everytime my mom cleans out the aquarium one of the fish die! idk if their used to the new water or not but my baby shark that ive had for like a year now just died :( how can i stop this from happening?

--ill rate high if u give good answers --

x0ox

Some fish need that chlorine-out stuff in their tanks. It takes the chlorine out of the water. Maybe the temperature of the water isn't right for the fish. Check for that. Also, make sure you have a filter. I'm also sorry about your baby shark. I hope I helped, and feel free to ask more questions!
*Manders*

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I burnt my finger on the cooker around half an hour ago, ran it under the cold water tap until it stopped hurting and forgot about it. But it's just started to hurt really badly again. I put a cold compress on it and put some antiseptic cream on but it doesn't seem to be stopping the stinging. What can I do?

Get an ice pack and keep it on there for a while (Take the ice pack off from time to time though!) Then put some aloe vera on it. I hope I helped and if you have any more questions, just ask!
*Manders*

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Ok i have a friend,call her Terry. Well she has a b/f and so do i.I wouldnt say im pretty,but she is very pretty.Anyways, her boyfriend wanted to see a pic of my b/f. She showed him some one SOOO NOT MY BOY FRIEND!! well Terry's b/f said "ohh...i woudlnt expect her to have a handsom boyfriend anyways" Terry did nothing about it but show me. I was sad,i dont no what to do,and WHY im feeling sad. Can someone give me help?
Signed ,
Ugly.

And you call this chick a friend! "Terry" should have stood up for you! Talk to her and let her know that you're hurt and what she did was wrong. If she doesn't do anything, I think you should reconsider your friendship, since you deserve better. If she were a real friend, she would have told her boyfriend the truth and would have stood up for you.
You might want to avoid her boyfriend too, since you don't need to be around people like him! Plus, you are beautiful and don't let anyone tell you different!! I hope I helped and ask me anything else if you need to!
*Manders*

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All my friends have had a boyfriend before except me. I really want one, but there is no one that seems right for me. A few guys have asked me out, but i have refused. I am more obsessed with school than guys, but sometimes i wonder if i should spend more time trying to get a boyfriend. I also find that most boys i was attracted to had been my friends. I am not sure why that is. Maybe because i knew them so well?
~Wondering

It's good that you are focused on school! School is important now and especially in the future. I don't think you should "spend time" finding a boyfriend, but once you meet the right guy, you should try to get to know him better. Maybe you're attracted to your guy friends because you know them so well. I hope I helped, and feel free to ask me anything else!
*Manders*

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