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March 30, 2010

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Im really pissed and I don't have any way to show it. Like all I can do is sit here and ponder everything that was said. And listen to somebody talk so i dont know what to do so that Im not even more pissed off at everybody. Im really annoyed by this.

Holding up emotions inside you is the WORST feeling ever! The best thing you can do is talk to somebody about it. If you dont feel right talking to a good friend or 'cool' family member like a cousin,etc..then definately talk to one of us on this website! Im more than happy to talk to you on AIM or something. I have TWO friends who are in anger management right now..and they really like it! One of my friends is going because his girlfriend really wanted him to go..the other has to go but both are really doing well. It doesnt mean they are crazy or weird..its jus a very healthy way of dealing with anger. Anger is an emotion that all of us experience..and i beleive the best way to deal with it is to talk about it.
You can do the other thing people suggested like listening to music,writing,taking a walk, etc..((and theres nothing wrong with that..i think they are great ideas)) but i just thought i would throw that out there that talking about it is the best way
-melissa-

if your boyfriend calls you at least once a day but then he doesnt does he not like you anymore

hey..i wouldnt worry about it. maybe he was out for the day, sick, tired, or with friends. if this goes on for a few days then i would be concerned tho.

Everyone says i need to change how i look to get a guy. But i dont know how....Even my family says that and i cant really change becuz i have no money. So i dont know what to do..... Can anyone like put some kewt outfits together and show me them or sumthing....because i want to find a new bf....But i dont know how to get a guy to like me without changing!

Dont get down on yourself.Be yourself sweetie! You dont need to spend money on new outfits or a manicure because the only thing that matters is the guy liking you for who you are and your personality. Getting a cute new outfit is nice to do something for YOURSELF..but dont go doing that stuff just to attract guys. Be yourself and show guys the real side of you.
:)

I'm a cutter, and I have been for over a year.
I'm trying to stop. For the most part its working but I've slipped up now.
I have a very deep cut on my ankle, the spot on the outside where the anklebone juts out. I cut it over a week ago, and its just scabbed[lightly] today.
It has a pulsing feeling, and hurts like heck.
The cut is about an inch long, and fairly thick.
Is it going to be alright?
I can't go to a doctor, because I can't tell my parents. Also, Is there a way to stop the pain???

If it gets worse or doesnt get better within the next couple days try going to the hospital on your own with a friend or something. they could just look at quick maybe and let you know if its infected or serious.

Why do I feel sick after every time I eat? err it's so annoying! It's not that I eat too much, or too little though.

I really dont know that many details about your situation and by no means am i a doctor lol...but pay attention to what you eat that makes you sick. Is it after eating dairy products like cheese or milk? If so it could be lactose intolerance. which means your stomach is sensitive to dairy products and you should stay away from them and only drink lactose milk. Thats the only thing i could think of..i really hope you feel better soon because that doeasnt sound so good at all :( Mention this problem to your mom or someone and maybe they can make an appointment to see your doctor..because afterall they know best ! :)
-meliss

I just wanted to say thanks for opening this even if you're not going to answer it! LOL! If you're a guy then you can really help me with this. Okay! So I wanted to know if guys like girls that are really easy or they like the ones that wait. I just wanted to know if guys lose respect for girls if the girl is all over them. I've tried to flirt but I might just suck at that. Like guys dont like me for me they dont want a relationship and I think its because they have no respect for me at all. I just dont know how to make guys like me just by talking to them. Because there's this guy that I like but he doesnt like me back and I dont know why but he does like this one girl and he says because she flirts with him and they have alot in common. And she only made out with him. Why does he like her and not me? I mean I cant change who I am at all because I've tried and it doesnt work out so well. I just dont like being used by someone and then being thrown away like trash! How can I change the way guys see me?

First off, you should never ever change who you are. Be proud of who you are and wait for the guy who loves you for who you are.
Next, im a girl but my opinion is guys might like easy girls just because they get sex or something sexual out of them. Guys probably wouldnt want to date easy girls because your right, they dont respect them and wouldnt want a slutty gf. A girl who carries herself well and has standards is a girl that a guy would want to have a relationship with. (in my opinion)
About the question why does he like her and not you? Well i guess its his loss..if he doesnt see you like that then its not your problem. brush him off and jsut keep in mind you will meet a guy who likes you. give it time..be yourself..and just go out there and meet new people. Dont throw yourself otu there by appearing desperate or slutty. Keep your head high and dont stress over guys who dont like you back..remember, their loss..not yours hun!
-melissa-

Okay im 16/f to start off =]

My problem is that I am so insecure.

Like I know that my bf wont cheat on me, well I don't know like 100% because well... here is my reason.

Like this person i know told me a story about this really really handsome and well mannered Lawyer and he turned out to be a serial killer

Like its completely unthinkable but it happened ya know?

So that's the problem. I hear all these weird stories, especially see on tv about how her husband stabbed her like over 20 times when they were married happily and had 3 kids.

also all those stories and shows on how guys cheats on their girlfriends.

I know those are some psychos and weirdos out there doing that, but I can't help but to wonder about those things.

I mean don't get me wrong, I love my boyfriend, Okay we been only going out for couple months but we were best friends before going out and known eachother for over a year so yeah =]

And he's really a nice guy, heck he was voted as the most friendliest person and has really good moral values such as no drinking and drugs and no sex till marriage.

But I cant help but to be paranoid about all those things.

Like i would get really paranoid if he even talks about another girl. I mean he doesnt talk about a girl like oh she's really pretty (unless he's joking...) but like he told me he had to work with 2 other girls one day and etc... and i got paranoid although i didnt say anything.

Or when he doesnt call or doesnt pick up my phone. Which is really not usual, and he always has a valid reason why he didnt pick up nor called. So i suspect im being paranoid again, but then later i think, what if he's just a really good liar?

So little stupid things bothers me like that.

What is wrong with me? I really dont understand why im so insecure and stuff like that! it makes me mad because he doesnt deserve all that non-trust thoughts going on in my head from me.

Hey nothing is wrong with you in a bad way..but you just need a self confidence boost. You should be confident in yourself and have the attitude like "yep, my guy is with me because he really likes me..and he wouldnt do anything to hurt me." Hes with you in a committed relationship..if he wanted to mess around he would have told you he didnt want a relationship, etc. There would definately be signs if he was cheating. You would notice hes unhappy with you, not wanting to hang out,making excuses why he cant hang out, cutting phone convos unusually short, you would be hearing busy tones while trying to clal or something, he wouldnt have stuff about you in his info or myspace at all so he can appear single..and other stuff like that.
Maybe a good idea to do is to make a list of all the things you lvoe about him..and at the end tell him to make a list for you..that could be cute! Or, fill out one of those myspace surveys about your bf or your number 1 friend or whatever. Before you give him your answers written down on paper, have him write his too! And this way, whenever you feel those silly thoughts come on, look at the nice things he wrote about you! I think that can help..because theres nothing better than a little reassurance to help boost your confidence! :)
feel better..and remember..hes with you because he knows your worth it and he really cares about you a lot!
-melissa-

So I just came out of a 24 hour relationship...Amazing, right? Not really. This is probably my 10th boyfriend and all of the previous ones have been jerks too me, I was so tired of it. Then this kid Gary was talking to me, and he dropped a few hints that he liked me, and then I dropped a few hints that I liked him back..But see, we only met once, and then we started talking on myspace and on the phone..
Then he was going to ask me out, and I told him I didn't really know, because if he met me after we started going out, he might think of me differently...

You know how someone talks to you for a long time, and you get a picture of how the person is, and then when you meet them, they're totally different?

Well that's what I ment, and he told me it wasn't going to be like that. He also told me that he'd treat me right unlike my exes and he's a really sweet guy too, and even like my friends that know him say he's really nice too, even my stepmom knew who he was, and said he was nice.

So he told me to don't worry because nothing will change, so we started going out. The next day we went to the pool and we started to hang. Normally I'm shy at first and then I get a little more comfortable. I thought everything was going all right, but like later he dropped another hint that "maybe you were right about us thinking that we are totally different then what we expected."
So i'm thinking, crap...

So later that night he broke up with me.
Great, he lied to me. BIG TIME. Thanks to him I'm like not trusting any guys for now on, because i've had 10 boyfriends who've done the same exact thing, and it's ughh...horrible!

So yah, he called, and said he only sees me as a friend. I'm just playing cool cuz yah know it would be retarded for me to start crying on the phone...Then he said he still wants to hang with me, like that'll happen! Normally I come to a point where I only have people who bring something into my life, why would I still want to hang with him? I wouldn't want to hang with him and pretend like everythings "okay"...
So yah, we were still on the phone, and he got another call, and I wasn't going to wait, so I hung up and turned off my cell and I started to cry...Pathetic, I know. But, I mean it's just hard how he said he wasn't going to be mean to me and lie to me and crap when he kind of did.

Atleast he did it now and not later so everything would be like worse..

And now I don't know what to do. I tell myself I don't want to date anymore 'cuz it's hurtful and nothing ever good comes out of it, for me...What should I do? I'm a nervous wreckk...ahh god here I go crying again..

Aww, dont cry okaay? Your right when you say that its better this happeend now than later. Do you know how many girls do sexual things with guys and THEN the guy dumps them? Its horrible how guys can be..and so many girls are going through that type of thing. If i were you i would take a breath. Hes just some guy you started talking to and you only went out for a day. I would brush it off..because it truly is his loss for dumping you. Another thing..DONT get into that mode where you dont want to date or trust guys. There are so0o many guys who are total idiots..but there are also a lot of really sweet ones out there too! :) (trust me, i got one of them haha) But why keep your emotions hidden inside? It will bother you so much because hes thinking that everything is fine..when really your pretty upset. Next time he calls explain that you dont want to hang out with him because you saw him as more than a friend and your pretty upset. Tell him its no biggie though because its his loss. > But hey..its summer! Get right back out there and meet new people! Trust me..you will come across the right guy..just remember to be careful of what you get into (dont get into anything sexual before being in a stable relationship) and just keep it light and pg13 while you meet new guys..and if they turn out to be losers, dont let them bring you down. Get right back in there hun and have fun meeting new people!
-melissa-

okay so my boyfriend and i will be home alone on thursday at his house.. and i'm sleeping over. any ideas of what to do that are fun and interesting? and if it helps we have done everything.. oh & he has a pool okay thankss =) any ideas are great!

go swimming! (minus the bathing suits) haha
now that you have the whole house to yourself..do whatever it is ;) in different places around the hosue!haha have fun

ok so heres the deal
so i dated this guy and everything was goin good and then we kinda started to argue a little bit so we decided to take a little break while he went to NYC on vaca. and then a couple days after he got back we would talk about things..well then he tells me that he fucked one of my closest friends while we were on the break and so we broke up and i was really hurt and i talked my "friend" that did this to me and she said shes sooo sorry and that she wont ever talk to him again n all this so he asked me back out and stupid me, i said yes and then in lunch the next day i saw her look at him and smile and i just couldnt take it so i broke up with him but we still talked and chilled but mind you he was doin the same with her but i got fed up with it and i just couldnt take it anymore so we ended things and that was about 3 months ago and its still so hard and it hurts so much to see pictures of them and stuff...and todays his birthday..actually both of there birthdays..and i cant stop thinking about him, i was going to send him a message on myspace saying happy birthday but i stopped myself. what can i do to help me get over him?

remind yourself of how much of a JERK he is! immagine a relationship with him..you would be constantly thinking hes cheating on you..(and i bet you he would be!) hes a loser and you desserve better. keep that mindset..and go out as much as you can.meet new people.good luck hun!

I have a bf that I'm in love with and he means absolutely everything to me. I've been with him for 7 months. He's amazing to me and we get along perfectly but sometimes I just get sick of him. He gets so annoying and I never want to talk to him. I met this other guy and he's a real sweetheart and we've known each other for about a month. He's also amazing and sweet. We got to know each other more and he really likes me and I really like him. He wants to date me and everything but I have a bf that I still really love. I like both of them. I feel so horrible..I can't even believe myself. I don't know what to do. I'm so stuck. Please help me.

this is going to be one of those really hard choices only you can make. think about life without your bf. would you miss him even though your with the new guy? if you think you would be happier with the new guy, go for him..but dont do anything you would regret.

Ok...I REALLY need an answer to this as fast as possible since i need to umm..use the advice right now.LOL...Ok..I am going out with someone and he is away right now on vacation so...we decided to have online sex.I've never had online sex before...How do i START the "conversation" with him?Because he told me to start.

i never participated in this kind of stuff but i have some ideas for you..
-tell him you're lonely and wish he was there right now :0 haha
-tell him what your wearing and that you want him to slowly take it off while he kisses you all over
-tell him what your gona do to him :0 use ur immagination. pretend he is right in the room with you and you two are about to do things..what would you do? you can tell him where your feeling and squeezing him and how its getting you really excited!
haha have fun with the convo hun! hope this helped
-meliss

hi. well i need help with my boyfriend. i love him so much but he really wants to meet my family my mom knows about him but doesnt want to tell my family. i feel bad he gets mad but what can i do? im so sad hes a good guy and i wanna be with him forever but hes sad he thinks i dont want him to meet them n stuff. =(

why doesnt your mom want to tell the family? If its over a stupid reason, i would introduce him anyway. Do you really think your family would object to him? If you really think they would interfere with the two of you, tell your bf and let him know its better not to meet the family because then they might get in the way of you and him. cheer him up and i bet with a little time he will get to meet your family. for now i would have a talk with your mom and ask her why she thinks its a bad idea for your bf to meet the family. i know everyone really wants their families to get along with each other..but ive been with my bf for over a year and my family hardly talks to his family. it hurts because i wish they were close enough so our mothers could go out shopping together or our dads could go golfing or something together..but it will never be like that for us.
hope it works out with you guys though!

me and my crush,we known each other since last december,he's in marine,right now he's in Nevada dessert for his training,after that he have to go to Iraq.I like him so much.he can't take his phone or whatever{with him}he sent me a message to myspace one time{when he got a chance} and last two days ago,he called me around 3;00 am..I woke up at that time but I din't familiar with that phone number that why I didn't pick up the phone{I was so regret}he told me "he miss me very very much and thinking about me a lot!"{I never hope that}I was crying at that time,till this day.I kept his voicemail and listen that again and again..cuz I miss him so much too.he said he call me back if he can.I miss him so bad..that can make me cry everynight,,I just want him to know that I miss him so much too,,,

aww. dont worry..sooner or later he will call you again or send another message. this time if a strange number calls, answer it! and when you do tell him how you feel! it would make his day to hear from you that you miss him a lot. you should even tell him you have feelings for him. he will give a call again soon hopefully..and when he does you will be ready this time :)
you can also tell your friends to let him know that you miss him a lot and to tell this guy that if he calls them.
good luck with everything..and dont cry hun! :)

16/f. Never had a real boyfriend or real kiss. Yeah, I feel pretty good about myself. Not. The worst part is, though, that everyone always tells me "Oh you're so pretty and nice" or whatever and yet, guys don't even look at me in any way that says "more than friends." I have this guy friend that I have sooo much in common with, and I've liked him for almost two years and I just don't understand why he doesn't like me back; I've been obsessing over it for days now and it's just an enigma to me. I mean, I'm literally the ONLY person I know who has no one who likes them; all of my friends have multiple guys that like them, and since I've started high school, not one guy has been interested in me. I'm not kidding. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. ANy ideas on what I could do to actually make guys want to be more than friends? Or at least any ideas to make me stop constantly thinking about this and feeling so upset; I just feel like I'm missing something important.

hey there is nothing wrong with the situation your in. its not the end of the world at all. i have a friend who didnt get kissed until 18 and its her first love and they are so cute together! i would rather take that path than the slutty path where girls are doing sexual things very young. i know how your feeling..but the best advice i can tell you is to be youurself. dont change anything about you..you could do things differently like go out to the movies more with friends, meet new people, gets friends to introduce you to more people, go to more parties to meet people, etc. but dont change your looks or personality just because you want to find someone. Honestly..people alwaaays find someoen when they LEAST expect it. So go on with your normal life..get out with friends often and meet new people..then BAM outa nowhere, you will find a guy.
Know how i met my current bf of 1 year 4 months? over a MYSPACE BULLITEN! yep, we were always myspace friends but we didnt know each other. one day i posted a bulliten because i was upset saying "anyone wana hang out?" > and what do ya know? he responded to the bulliten and we were inseperable ever since.
so dont get down on yourself..enjoy time with your friends and gettign out to meet new people..and sooner or later you will meet the guy for you :)

I know this isn't the right category but it's the most popular so please just bear with me.

I am so miserable. I've had nothing but a run of bad luck for the last two months.

First the business I worked for closed down, so then I had to find a new job, I found one but hate it.

Then my car was broken into $600 dollars worth of damage.

I live with my grandparents and my grandma is so strict on me, I do absolutely nothing wrong, I don't go out and drink and party, i'd rather stay home with my boyfriend or have a night with the girls. My friends are good people, most of them are at uni.

My boyfriend and I have been together for just over two years. I'm 19 he's 21 in 3 weeks.

In my new job I have to study for it. I have a computer at home but it's easier for me to use a laptop so I could study quietly in my room so my boyfriend lent me his.

We plan on moving in together in the next 12 months so instead of me buying a laptop he's getting a desk top computer and i'm using the laptop.

Well last night I was saving things in my memory stick so he could have all his stuff on the new computer then I cam across conversations between him and all these other girls.

Ok mind you the conversations were two years ago just as we got together but they were dirty conversations with other girls and some of them even said um you have a girlfriend and his response was what goes on here stays here.

I was hurt although they happened a long time ago it was hard to read something like that from someone you love so much. At that stage he was sweeping me off my feet and tell me he loved me for the first time.. why was he still talking to these other girls...??!

I confronted him about it and he said they meant nothing and that none of the convos went any further then that.. where has my Mr Perfect gone?

Am I over reacting because they were a long time ago..?? I guess it was just a shock to see that side of him.. I have never seen that dirty side of him... never!

Could he have just been after a bit of fun because I wasn't there? But then again that's still no excuse right??

I live in a small town so I know who all these other girls are.. I guess I just feel embarrassed becaue those girls knew that I was with him and he was still after more.

Now back then, I was still at school.. As I said my grandma is very strict so I want only allowed to see him on the weekends.. We did only just get together.. about a month before those convos started.

Should I give him credit for waiting for me or be mad at him for disrespecting me?

I'm tired of being miserable.. I love my boyfriend with all my heart and I know he loves me and I know he has always been faithful to me.

I can kind of understand if he was looking for someone else back then but I just wanted to know if it was right to be mad at him..!

Thanks guys! :)

yes, you had the right to be mad because its natural to be hurt when you discover something was said or done behind your back by someone you care about a lot. however, i do think you should forgive because you guys have been together for a long time and you have no suspision hes cheating or anything..and if you have been together this long there must be something there. guys are all horny and curious at that stage..but the important thing is he isnt cheating and the nasty convos stopped.
but to answer your question..yes you had the right to be mad and to let you in on some personal info..i know how it feels lets just say that.
hope i helped
-melissa

is it weird that i get horny spying on my brother when he's masturbating or is it just curiosity?

i dont want to feel this way but i dont knwo what to do.

please help!!

alright..it sounds a little weird but dont worry, its just your hormones. i think you should stop spying on him and instead maybe masturbate yourself , watch porn, look at videos online, anything but spying on your brother. curiosity is normal..but i think you should observe this kind of stuff from other sources than your brother.

i work in a restuarant and my boss is really weird. he's like in his thirties but always hits on me and asks me when im finally gonna let him take me home. it makes me really uncomfortable but i dont knw what to do about it. i asked him to stop but he just tells me to stop teasing him and that he knows i want him.

plz help if you have any advice.

Oh, im 16 btw

that is so disgusting! i've heard stories about this kind of stuff going on with people i know also. if i were you i wouldnt let him talk to me like that. i would say something to my parents and they would know what to do and how to handle this. he sounds like a nasty perv molester..and i think you should get this guy in trouble QUICK because who knows..he might make a move on you or force you to do something? i dont want that happening. you should get him in trouble ASAP. Tell his boss or another manager..tell your parents..talk to police..,etc..because nobody desserves to be harassed.
good luck hun!

Out of about...6 months of school I've had around 45 days off school because school has become such a big issue for me...and I don't want to talk about it.

Anyways I might be moving back to my old high school and have an interview tomorrow. Because of the days I've had off school it slims my chances of getting in. I have to bring my report card.

If I was a really good student my grades would cancel out the days I've had off, but going to school or not going to school I'm not the best student.

I only have two things going for me: When I used to go to that school I had an A+ report card (But this was 2 years ago) and it's really close to me. These won't hold up...

What are other things I can mention so I can get in?

mention your future plans and how this means a lot to you. explain to them you had a tough time in your other school but you are ready to work hard. do you play sports or participate in any clubs? if not would you want to? tell them all about it and tell them you want to straighten up and you really think changing schools is for the best. promise to keep on top of your work..and if you never had behavior problems..let them know about that too.

ive never given oral sex before, but even just brushing my teeth, i choke all the time. will i choke will giving oral? how can i make myself not choke?

thanks!

you were hitting your gag reflex with the toothbrush, thats what gave you the weird feeling of like throwing up or gagging. if you go overboard while giving oral and have sensitive gag reflexes, youu will get the same gagging sensation. just know your boundaries and dont try putting the whole thing in if you know you cant. the first time you try it you will get a feel for what you feel comfortable with..and what is too much. my advice is to take it easy annd go slow so you figure out what would make you gag. good luck and any more questions definately inbox me! :)

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