about

I was on this site before recording my first single. I will stay a member of this site. I am asking that each of you support me by visiting my webpage. I have posted music that I have written and recorded. Check out Wildside featuring Father Jah, and I want, created in memory of 2Pac.
http://www.reverbnation.com/Venomtheonly1

I am open, honest, truthful yet also insightful and understanding. I am a Strong woman with morals, belief, and character. I value life, myself and life of everything, everyone and all. I am mature, caring, giving, straight up and real!

I am not harsh, rude, or disrespectful but I am going to tell you the truth because you are asking for that. If you want a lie or support that you know is invalid because you question it yourself, please don't get mad at me for the truth because that is what sets us ALL free!! Peace, Venom



advice

I am very stressed out at the moment, to the point where I am continuously having trouble falling asleep, focus when I really need to, keep myself motivated, etc., etc. I am preparing for one of the most important exams of my academic (and professional) life, the dreaded LSAT, and the stress is, of course, doing absolutely nothing to improve the situation; it's debilitating in a way. I understand that most people who have to take this exam are stressed- the whole law school application process, along with this exam, is enough to drive more than a couple people berserk. But the thought that everyone in this boat goes through this is doing nothing to help.

I thought I'd ask for some advice on how to manage stress...it could only help. For anyone (and I imagine it's lots of people) who has had test anxiety, stress of any sort, actually, what are some good (and healthy) ways to manage the stress and keep focused? It's getting in the way of everything...so any advice is appreciated.

I completely understand. I took the CPA exam and it was stressful. I couldn't eat or sleep. I found out that studying too much causes you to forget and stress more.

I wanted to go to law school at first, but it would've been really hard for me to do because I had children at such a young age, but I was thankful to finish college with a double major and take the CPA exam.

Managing the stress - devote a specified number of hours to study do not go over that time. Once completed, light some candles (aroma candles if at all possible), listen to some Floetry and
Maxwell, or some nice soft jazz - Eric Roberson is great, and shut the lights off or turn them down really low, take a hot bath with steam and bubbles, and just chill. Turn off the phone, and the tv this allows your mind to relax. The mind must relax before the body can, seriously.

Change up eating habits, try cutting back on late night snacks, just as they cause nightmares, they also tend to cause the mind to jump everywhere, and that is not relaxing your mind at all, it's doing the complete opposite.

It's great to study, but don't over study it's causing you to stress out more. Trust me you will be just fine, get that confidence up and know that you got this! good luck and take it easy, literally. "smile"

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hey sorry i know this is a really wierd question and all but i have to know....
whats a blow job, hand job, and giving head??

you are too young to even be asking this if you don't know what it means. Why don't you go on line and type in the different words you are asking about and read up on what comes up. I don't think we are really allowed to give great detail on subjects related to your question.

You could also ask an older family member what the difference is or you could just continue doing things kids your age do, and wait until you are older and you will automatically find out as you grow older. I didn't know what any of that stuff meant until I was 15, and it was hanging with the wrong people. "hint hint"

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Which is better, to stick with a relationship that has so many up and down moments due to the sheer differences in personality, religion, and God knows what else, simply because you don't want to look back and say you didn't give it your all, or to stop feeling trapped by a relationship that increasingly seems to be falling apart.

20's, male.

It really depends on what you want for your life. You are 20 years old. It is almost impossible to settle down at that age. Have you tried talking with her about your differences and coming to a median for an agreement so you both are happy? If you are feeling that your relationship is falling apart she is most likely feeling it too. If both of you want this relationship and are willing to make compromises as needed for happiness, work on it. If you are both willing to make sacrifices for one another and both benefit not just one, then try to work it out. If there is no way that you can work it out because you have already tried, then let it go before it consumes you.

There are going to be ups and downs in a relationship, so I don't base my answer on that fact. I base my answer on happiness - are you happy? is she happy? are you happy together? if not, then it's best to let it go, regardless of love. Tina Turner said it best, what's love got to do with it? I am sure that people will disagree with me, which is fine, I respect their opinion. The reason I say to over look love is because I can love from a distance. I don't have to love all up close and personal increasing conflict, confusion and disputes. If the differences are that huge in variance it's not going to work anyway, so why stay in it for 10 years, possibly have a child, and then feel trapped. You are already saying the word trapped -right? Trapped is so negative, yet positive when realized.. simply because you aren't locked, only trapped which means you can find a way to get out of it, there's no key. Hope you feel me on what I am saying.

I don't believe in time being wasted, I believe in making time, not time making me! Hell, I was trapped in a relationship for over 17 years. I should have gotten out of it at the 5 year mark, I didn't. I stayed in it, because we did have children, we had gone through so much, and I wanted to stick it out - in the end, we were both abusing each other (mentally and physically later on), he was just as frustrated and tired of me as I was him but we were like that ole' Gladys Knight song - Neither one of us - finally I woke up and realized that I would always love him for the good things shared and the children.. but it was more important for me to love myself because he couldn't love me the way I wanted to be loved, or the way I loved myself.

I fault the differences to our issues - everything was completely different, which made us unequally yoked, it wasn't going to work out anyway. We had NOTHING in common except our beautiful children who are now 16,15,and 12. Guess what? the things he did that used to make me so upset years ago, he still does them today and he will always do them until the day he dies. If I would've stayed with it, I would still be unhappy today. I am so happy now, that I talk to people and encourage them to find peace, happiness and tranquility no matter what, no matter who.

Good Luck!

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Pretty much, I'm 15, my brother is 16, he is about 15 months older than me. Recently, last summer or so, we got close, and hung out with each other everyday. I smoked cigarettes for about 2 years by that time & weed for a year, and he had just started smoking weed. I was OK with that. It's just weed. I talked to him told him that I don't want him doing anything else, My mother also. Not too long after, I came to discover, him experimenting with other things, prescriptions pills. soon he did coke for the first time. I was telling myself, whatever everyone experiments, I had and I didn't do anything else afterwards, I was hoping it would be that way for him. Well, soon he started doing pills more regularly, I tried talking to him.. He was just like oh I won't get addicted I promise. Now, It's gotten to where he won't listen to ANYONE. Me, my mom, his friends, and more of our family has talked to him. All he thinks about is getting high, how is he getting money, what is he doing next. Basically, he has stopped going to school except for, 2 times a week, my mother is out of options and I am too. My father loves both of us so much and we are all at a loss in this because we are losing my brother and he is too naive to realize it.
What should I or we do?

You are right, something has to be done and soon. Drugs are very addictive, regardless of will power, and soon nothing matters but the drugs or how to go about getting them. I completely know about every drug one could try and it's not fun once the after affect has hit and you've lost everything and everyone!

I know you love your brother and very much at that to post this question on his behalf. People don't change habits or ways because someone has made them do it. People change as a result of doing some self evaluation and determining that they need help. They first must admit that they have a problem. If he isn't willing to do that, then there is honestly nothing that you or your family can do accept support him as he hits rock bottom OR your parents could admit him into a drug treatment center, because of his age. He isn't considered as an adult yet and if he demands to continue acting like one, he should be given the opportunity to become an adult 100%, which means he moves out, takes care of himself, and sees what life is really about. "The hard way". Some people really have to fall and burst their butts before opening their eyes to vision what's really going on.

If he's admitted into a center, they will treat him for the drug problem and provide additional support because of the emotional and psychological effects he will go through from not being able to get the drug.

If he is experimenting with different types of drugs - an evaluation of how he is getting the money needs to be considered. Is the money being given to him or is he working for it? If he is being given the money, then whoever is giving it needs to cut it off, and give him no money. If he is working for it, and refuses to cooperate with getting help, he needs to be kicked out of the house to run his race until he sees for himself that it is not worth it. Another thought that concerns me is this - what type of people does he hang around with? I don't believe in picking my children's friends because my kids are 16,15,and 12. They must make decisions for themselves but I will guide, and be there while those decisions are being made. If my children are hanging with other peers who are into drugs, sex, disrespectful things, selling drugs, stealing any of that, then they know they aren't welcomed to my house nor can they call my house, nor can my children hang with them with my knowledge of it anyway.

The fact of him NOT talking about it or listening to what people are saying to him somewhat makes me think that he isn't going to willingly agree to go to the drug treatment program either. Upon that being determined, your parents will have to step their game up and put their foot down. He is not grown and shouldn't have the right to NOT go to school.

Your parents could get in trouble for that legally, and if authorities find out that he is on drugs, they could also remove him from the home, and attempt to prove your parents unfit. I know that's how the law is here in KY. seriously. Once those people get all up in your family business, it's hell to get them out of it.

Your parents could also contact the court system in your state, advise that he is unruly even without violence- it's the fact of skipping school and doing drugs- he will get a court date, and have to go before the judge. The judge will then court order him to attend these drug classes or get locked up in the juvenile system. At this point, it is going to take TOUGH love since Sincere Love isn't working. Catch it and stop it NOW, before it escalates into something much worst. (which is him falling down and bringing his family down with him).

I encourage you to stay off of drugs, and do not experiment with them anymore, please. Stay in school, stay focused and concentrate on your future. I am very proud of you for realizing that your brother has a problem and needs help and I respect you for asking for help to get that assistance needed for him.

Good Luck, dear heart and stay strong! I am praying for your and your family that he over comes this hold on his life and that your family becomes stronger and prospers.
Take Care!

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I'm planning on getting my tongue pierced, but I'm tongue-tied (I have a really short tongue). Do I have to get that little...thing under my tongue clipped so I can get it pierced? And what if there's no medical reason to get it clipped, can you do it just to do it? How much does it cost? And how long does it take for your tongue to heal afterwards? Sorry for so many questions! Any help at all is appreciated!

It's best to go to the place that is going to pierce your tongue so that they can look at it and tell you if you are able to get one or not. I have a tongue ring, but I don't wear it all the time because of the career I am in. I had my tongue pierced twice. The first time, it didn't hurt when they did it. I didn't even know they were done, when they were. It is best to eat some ice before hand.

It hurts afterwards because of the swelling of your tongue. It hurt for about 2 days for me. I didn't eat solid foods, until the 3rd day. It costs me 40.00 at Tattoo Charlie's. The second time I had it done, which was 3 years later, it cost 40.00 still. It closed up because I had stopped wearing it.

The second time it hurt really bad when they did it because they pierced in the same spot that it was the first time. They had to go through scarred tissue. It bled, but not bad. The first time, it bled but only a little, but more the second time. The same day I had it done, the second time, I went out to eat and ate solids, with no problem, only a little sting. It is important to keep it cleaned, they will tell you all of this when you get it done. It also only takes about 10 minutes if that and it's done.

Hope this helped, if not you can contact me through my inbox here or at sophia_pettus@yahoo.com.

Good Luck and I hope you like it. I love mine.

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Help! I'm redoing my room this summer and I have nooo idea what colors I want it to be. Whenever I think of a good color scheme, I change my mind.

I'm 16, female.. I want my room to have a happy, but yet calm and relaxing feeling. I love bright/light colors. I hate dark colors.

Please give me some suggestions, thanks! :)

pink and light green or peach and a light turqoise or sea mist is beautiful and very calming. Check out some of those colors coordinated together and you find it very peaceful. Try adding candles. Bright colors sometime cause confusion (yellow, hot pink, those type of colors), try lighter colors such as pastel insead of brighter colors. Also, try to stay away from a red room. I love the color red, as it is my sorority color, however red on walls, curtains and beds tend to make people eat more, which is the reason many chinese places have so much red in their establishments. just some food for thought! "smile"

I have also found that sea shells and beads or large earth toned beads in a jar or vase are also very calming and beautiful. Things reflective of water are also calming and peaceful. They have beautiful water fall type figures that are very relaxing. I have seen them at walmart even.

I hope you enjoy your new room. Please let me know if I can give you anymore ideas. I love decorating.

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My best friend who i used to like lies to me and blows me off half the time. Today during school i asked her to hang out and she told me she had to clean her house. Later on i went to the carnival in town and i see her there. Everytime i look in her direction she hides from me, i look over and she hides behind her friendsor turns around. Why does she do this?

You are her best friend, but is she your best friend? It doesn't sound like it. Sounds like she is tired of you and that you may be kind of worrisome to her in her eyesight. You will never know until you ask her what the problem is. Don't make assumptions, and please don't think that I was. I am only telling you what I think. It is very juvenile and childish to not openly say what's on your mind.

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I need to write a card to one of my favorite teachers now that I'm graduating, but I really don't know what to write. Do you have any ideas+

Info: she's my biology teacher, makes everything very intesresting, launches in to stories about personal experiences every now and then (that are really fascinating), travels alot and has been almost everywhere, its because of her I'm going to continue with bio..

I just want it to be nice without being cheesy!

thanks ;)

Your teacher has been a role model for you. She has uplifted you and you look up to her. You have an interest in pursuing Biology because she took a subject that is generally stero-typed to be boring and enjoyed by geeks and made it interesting for you, which has shown you that Biology isn't for geeks at all and that it is received as taught. Is this what you are trying to say about your class and teacher? If so, just think about what she means to you, how the classes have helped you. Share with her the positive impact she has had on your life and your future plans of continuing in Biology. now, that's not cheesy at all, and she will appreciate it very much!

I am proud of you without even knowing you and I encourage you to continue excelling in your classes. Congrads on graduating and keep up the good work. I also respect your maturity and kindness of heart for the appreciation you have towards your teacher.

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is there a way to um, make your butt bigger?

it's based on work out, such as lounges, and squats.

Also, try purchasing jeans or shorts with pockets on the back of them - it enhances the appearance. mid low ride jeans also enhance the appearance of butt.

Also, you can just buy some, like I want to do. LOL seriously, you can also purchase pads that go back there until you get yours the way you want it. If you have noticed it's almost like every body that you see has a huge butt now.. right and 7 out of 10 is a fake padded butt. I am including some websites that tell what to do for butt enhancement naturally.

http://www.lindisima.com/en/butt.htm
http://www.zafu.com/oo/zafu/shape.do
http://www.http://exercise.about.com/cs/butthipsthighs/f/buildingbuns.htmleehayward.com/butt_exercise.htm

if you want, you may do an actual search on the butt pads on the internet.





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13/f
theres this friend that i have. she is like a sister to me, but lately shes been acting very...messed up. for example ill tell her that im going to coney island whatever and she'll start talking about how shes got a boy friend, got new nikes, going to six flags, etc. so im like okay...cool? nd then shes like y did you tell me that? and then im like,...cuz i wanna. nd then she'll be like, well i dont care. nd then ill say whats up with you and she'll be like you shoved something in my face so im shoving sonething bak. i didnt really mean for it 4 seem like that, but yea. ill tell her that and shes like true. then she'll be like you never invite me anywhere. and of course i do, i just dont go places much, so i tell her that. shell be like ok, true, im happy 4 ya. so yes, ill be very pissed by then. i dont know, she has done so many hurtful things to her, and me? like one or two mistakes. but her "gurtful things" arent mistakes, its the way she actually is. so im very confused and mad and hurt, its just a mixture of feelings. i know i luv her very much(as a friend) but i just dont feel like her friend anymore. i dont know what im asking, but i hope you'll be able to know. i guess im asking what i should do. so yea, any advice would be highly appreciated. thankx!

Something's up and going on.

Why not invite her to go somewhere (just the two of you), even if it's just coming to your house for some snack foods and sit back and talk.

Sounds like you guys have stopped doing things that you used to do together and that she is becoming distant towards you as if you have no time for her, or maybe she feels like you are throwing up activities in her face as mockery because she can't do it or didn't get invited to attend with you. (a small case of jealousy). I hope not being that you two are close like sisters. Part of being close as sisters is communication and having those deep heart to heart conversations regardless of feelings getting in the way, some things just have to be said, point blank in order to get past it and over it to move forward.

Try not to play the blame game, pointing fingers in order to cast fault, just tell her how you feel, how you used to feel, and why you feel the way you feel now. You are questioning if this friendship is of value? if you are getting and giving something out of the friendship then it is of value, GOOD friends are hard to find and come by. If she has been there for you and you have been there for her, work on it. If you are the one always giving, taking mess, dealing with petty things, and accepting things from her that you would rather not deal with or even listen to, then you may want to look at cutting it off.

Life is too short to deal with fakeness but if you and your friend(s) are true,and real to each other then salvage your friendship. After you guys talk and no communication for the better has been established then it may be best to cut the friendship becasue it's been cut too deep. If you all end up on the same page, and can laugh about the misunderstandings as you develop some understanding, then renew your friendship and be happy!

Good Luck, miss lil' lady and feel free to ask me anything you want at any time.

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Hello everyone,
Im Miranda, and i need a job besides Publix.
i am really great with kids I have a 2 year old brother but my Grandma is so attached to him I never get to babysit him and if i do babysit I don't get paid. Does anyone know where i can get a job in Tampa ? please and thank you .

Miranda, it's hard to actually answer this question because I don't know your age. If you are interested in baby sitting, I would get a newspaper and search for jobs in the baby sitting field. Also, go through the yellow pages and call different businesses that you may be interested in working and ask if it is at all possible that you could come in and do some work for them for the summer. Sounds like you may still be in school and need a summer job.

You may also do a web search on summer jobs for teenagers in Tampa, Fl. I am sure something will pull up on that too.

Good Luck

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Two(possibly three)of my friends and I are hoping to move to New York for the summer next year, ideally in or as close as possible to the East Village or closer to the Times Square area. I was wondering if anyone could tell me what we might expect to pay for an apartment? any tips on cheaper places? Also, what areas would and wouldn't be generally considered safe to live in?

http://www.cityrating.com/costOfLiving/state.asp?state=NY

Above I have added a link to a website that identifies the cost of living in New York. This site will also identify the crime statistic per city in New York in comparison to the National Average. I am hopeful and thoughtful that this site will help answer the majority of relocation questions that you may have.

Good Luck

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me and my mom got kicked out of our grandparents house and she got fired from her job we at her ex boyfriends house for one night then we have to live in her car and we have no where to go what should i do i have been crying for the last 4 hours

I know exactly what you are going through. I was homeless for about 3 months and I had 3 children at the time, and they were too young to ask for help.

The first thing I did was contacted the Cabinet for Women and Children to advise that I was homeless, the next thing I did was stayed at a shelter, worked, continued caring for my children as best I could, while working. My children had to go to daycare and I was able to seek assistance for childcare payment. If you are old enough to obtain a job, it is very important to help your mom. Your mom could go through a temporary agency to find a fast job with fast pay quickly for fast income.

There are apartments that help people with no income through the housing authorities, normally there is a waiting list, but due to the urgency of the matter, your mom qualifies as an emergecy resident. Please contact the local housing authorities there as well.

Some one recommended contacted the grandparents and asking if you all could stay there a little while longer - while I do understand that, I disagree with it because your grandparents put all of you out, knowing the situation so it is apparent that they don't want you there.

If you belong to a church, contact the pastor and advise of the situation. Churches also help. Crying isn't going help, but it is purely natural and I totally understand dear heart. I am praying that all works out for you and your family. I have never understood why certain things happen but once it's over, it is clear as to the purpose of why it happened. ALL happens for a reason (good things and bad things). Be strong for your mother, support and encourage her as you gain the support from all of us commenting to you.



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My husband is 29, his sister is my age 21. They have, in my opinion, the most inappropriate relationship ever. She'll come and just sit in his lap and cuddle up with him. Or if shes sitting on the couch he will sorta attack her in a huge bear hug and end up on top of her. Once he was eating dessert and she came and sat on his lap and he started to feed her from his dessert. He didn't even think to offer me until after she had already eaten from his spoon. I don't know what all of you think, but I find this utterly disgusting...its weird, gross, and just plain wrong!

I talked to him about it, and he felt that I was being ridiculous and said that I have intimacy issues because in my family we are not all over each other. yaa we give hugs and stuff..but wrestling with each other on the couch and sitting on laps, and feeding each other...thats just weird. He was like, she is my sister! I told him, "EXACTLY! she's your sister...thats why I have such a problem with this". I even told him that I dont want her sitting on his lap any more..shes not a small child and its not cute when she comes and sits on his lap. He had the nerve to tell me he'll think about it...not okay I understand this is bothering you and I'll stop... he's just going to think about it. How wonderful..

I know no one can really do anything about this, but I guess I just need to see what others think about this. Is it just me or is it weird for siblings to treat each other the same way they would treat their significant others; minus the kissing on the lips and sex?

All answers are welcome and much appreciated. :)

SEE MY EDIT: I got your note, girl.. email me sophia_pettus@yahoo.com so we can talk some more. I didn't know how to send you a note besides this way. "sorry"


I have no biological brothers or sisters. I am an only child. just me.. none the less, my older cousin is 11 years older than me and I was raised as if he was my older brother. We say we are brother and sister now and we are very close now. Everytime I see him which is every day, he hugs me and I kiss his cheek or he kisses my cheek. What I am saying is that all families are very different thus far as showing affection.
I sit in my fiance's lap all the time, but that's different. I understand your concerns which I am going to address. I don't sit in my brother's lap anymore but I remember when I used to.

You are having some self issues of concern, and yes they should be respected by your husband for the fact that it takes you out of your element and makes you feel uncomfortable. He should be willing to do whatever makes you comfortable. I don't think that incest has happened or will happen but I do think that you honestly have some esteem and insecurity issues that you need to deal with internally without your husband. I also sense some jealousy to the extent of not getting this type of attention from him, yet you want it.

I think he is very selfish in making his comment when you expressed your feelings pertaining to his sister sitting in his lap. We would've had some serious issues if he would've told me that and not acted on it. He could be part of the reason that self esteem, jealousy and insecurity could potentially exist. So, I feel your concern, I even understand them but first you have deal with it for self first and your marriage secondly.

GOOD LUCK.





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So, I'm dating a man I've known for a long time. I'm white and he's black. When people see photos of us together or hear about him, for some reason they always have to comment and say things like 'Oh he's black..." or "I'd never thought /you'd/ date a black guy."
I don't understand what the problem is personnaly, I love him and he's so fantastic.
I was wondering though, when you see a white girl and a black man, what do you automaticaly assume or think? Just interested to know.

The stigma of a black man dating a white woman has already been pre-set,pre-determined and pre-judged. Partly due to stero-types set by society and partly due to historical facts which encourages the pre-judgement of inter-racial dating & marriages.

I am black/Panamanian woman and I have never thought of what my actual feelings are towards inter-racial relationships. I feel like to each it's own. I will not date a white man. I am in no way racist as I have family members of all races and cultures. Everyone has their own preference in life. I believe in respect and nothing less regardless of their choice (from race to gender)

I will point this out, I have found that many black men who once struggled in the past to become successful in the future do date and marry the black woman while suffering and going through the hell, but whenever they reach that peak of the mountaintop or conquered their challange, they tend to leave the black woman for the white women. I find this disappointing, shady and wrongful because it's normally not about love, feelings, or emotions the important factors of a relationship. Instead it's about trying to forget the struggle they once had, or trying to forget who they really are, as a result of not liking who they were and being confused on who they are so they chose to reinvent themselves completely, even to the extent of downing their own race as a whole, including the black woman & their family.

This is the only negative thing I see about an inter-racial relationship and If I do see a successful black man with a white woman, I question if it's about love or other, but that's about it.

I am sure that people would say the same thing if I dated a white man. I never thought she would date a white man. I didn't know he was white, some would even think, she's using him for his money.

Anyway, as long as you are happy, I am happy for you! your relationship is based on love and I support it!

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ok so i'm 15 guy is 17
just started getting my period a year ago so its kind of irregular.
well i lost my virginity in the beginning of May
and the last time i had my period was in the middle of April.. could i be pregnant?
for the last 3 months my period came within 3 weeks and before that i missed my period for 2 months.
We did it with out a condom about two times

WHY would you do that? I HATE IT. I hate that it is even possible that another teen age mother could be in the makings. I tell girls your age all of the time, "NO HUNKING".

I talk to so many girls face to face, online, etc. and I try so hard to encourage them not to even have sex and if they feel they must (since I did it and got pregnant the first time I had sex and had a baby by the age of 17)and let me tell you, it has been HARD. Finishing high school pregnant, going to prom pregnant working 2 jobs while finishing college. It's scary, not cute at all and life becomes 50000 times harder when a little one depends on you for all and you are still a little one yourself.

Please get a pregnancy test and tell your parents you are sexually active. If you have been blessed not to be pregnant at such a young age, please be responsible. You are having sex as an adult so make decisions as one - PROTECT YOURSELF or JUST STOP DOING IT.. And another thing to be mindful of, 60% of the time when a girl gets pregnant the boy who did it is NOT THERE, doesn't claim the child and there she is left ALONE to take care of a baby while pressing him for child support as she and their child struggle. Sure, he will claim to be a man but his action AND irresponsibility make him a boy and that's the point that age isn't a factor - either it is or it isn't, you are or you aren't.

Please love yourself more and know the sex doesn't prove love or loyalty! live your life, enjoy your childhood, set goals of going to college and being successful in your life. The hell with peer pressure.Pressure bursts pipes.

I am praying that you are NOT pregnant and that you become wiser and place yourself higher so that you will have more, see more, become more, achieve more and keep more as you mature more.

please email me and tell me what the outcome is. I hope I haven't hurt feelings or caused you to feel bad, I really just have high hopes for all youth because I want to see them succeed and excel within their life to their highest potential. Life is precious, you only have one to live and it's important to be happy in it.
Good Luck dear heart.
sophia_pettus@yahoo.com

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(Will be long! Sorry!) I dated a girl since 7th grade, married her at the end of high school, had a few kiddos with her, and never loved her. Well of course I loved her but only because I'd never been with anyone else. She was my first everything. Then I met TJ. We became best friends several years ago and for a long time there was no attraction because she and her husband were too serious. But they ran into some issues which plunged she and I into a relationship that both of us had on the back of our minds from the start. We are in love now, and really serious, even though she & her husband are back to normal.

My wife found out I was cheating, but didn't know who with. So TJ's unmarried friend took the heat for her so that her husband wouldn't find out. My wife & I are now divorced. I'm in love with TJ and she and I are still having an affair but eventually she will have to choose.

How do I prepare myself for a break up? I threw away everything for her and I don't regret it, but I love her too much to make her do the same. If she leaves me, how do I cope with that and never burden her? I hate the position we're in.

-NB

Well.. I am having so many mixed emotions in reading your question. Part of me wants to tell you that you are wrong for messing with a married woman and were wrong for messing around on your wife. Now, what makes you think that she won't cheat on you once you two end up together?

Part of me wants to tell you the hell with it. If she doesn't want her husband, and has plans to divorce him and opts to be with you, then go for it and be happy but please be true and devoted to eachother so that a cycle isn't birthed.

It's kind of hard for me to respect the fact that you were man enough to cheat on your wife, yet not man enough to admit it to her. She found out and then you still lied and played the game of letting her think it was someone it wasn't. You also allowed TJ to help you in making your wife look like a fool - I don't think your relationship with TJ will prosper because of the manner it was handled, but I am not one to judge anyone and I won't do that. This is only my opinion.. and happiness is key

This is one reason I do not believe in male/female friendships, no matter or how innocent they start off, there ends up being some type of attraction.

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I'm so upset right now! There's this one teacher who's never trusted me although I've never done anything to deserve it. As soon as something goes wrong, or something is missing - she accuses me, and I promise.. I'm NEVER the one to blame. Last week I returned my book, and today she called me to say "It is very important that you return your book, you are the only one who hasn't returned it and it is a very expensive book. Keep in mind you promised to return it at the beginning of the year" I know its not a big deal but I'm crying my eyes out! I don't feel like I deserve all this suspicion I'm getting from her. I don't like to think its a racial issue, but I am the only non-blonde in my class. What should I do about this? I do not want to take it up with the principal, I respect her as a person and wouldn't want to get her in trouble.

First and foremost, I am not aware of your age or grade. None the less, I would consult my parents in reference to these issues at hand. Your parents are adults, your teacher is an adult and the pricipal is an adult too.

I understand that you respect her, which is good and I respect you for this fact. I have 3 children and they are taught to respect their teachers, and elders, however once disrespected please escalate the issue(s) up to me for proper handling and communications. If you feeling as if you're being treated differently due to your hair color OR anything else, this needs to be addressed darling, seriously. Please tell your parents of your different experiences and each incident with this teacher so that the principal is made aware. I know that you don't want her to treat anyone else the way that she has treated you.

Good Luck and focus on your education and grades, regardless of any situation. Move the mountain don't let mountains move you.

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My dearest friend is unhappy with her love life. But she's been with this guy for about 3 and a half years. She's about 18 now. All they do is fight and make one another miserable. She says she would be miserable with out him but other days she said she's scared to be alone and thats why she stays with him. I wouldn't say it's much of a relationship due to how they treat each other.

In the past I have tried my best to tell her she needs someone better. I've even gone as far as verbally attacking her boyfriend and telling him to get out of her life. I'm worried about her and it makes me sick to see her so unhappy. Lately I've been just sitting by her side and listening to her. She says thats all she wants and appreciates it from me. I try my best to support her and be honest when she asks something of me. But I want to tell her to move on from her boyfriend and find someone new or take some time for herself. Like she knows reality of how everything is.. But Idk...

Have I done the right thing by no longer meddling and being by her side instead if she needs me? Or should I take action again?

Yes, you have done the right thing by not meddling and being there when she wants and needs you to be.

I am sorry that she is in the situation that she is in. I am very hopeful that she comes to reality of why she isn't happy and does something aobut it but you can't force or rush her. Continue being there for her as you have been.

What a great friend you are.

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i like a girl since 3 months but i could not talk to her i feel depress and i like her want say i love u to her but i m feared that if she rejects me then....i want to impress her.what should i do???

Why would you tell anyone you love them after only liking them for 3 months? Why is it that you couldn't talk to her?

I don't think you have to impress her, intentionally. I think that you just let her know how you feel about her, and that you LIKE her not LOVE her. Tell her that you have interest in her and would like to get to know her better.

Being self, open, honest and up front is an automatic impressive character about someone. It's also true and real - when you do things to impress someone and you get them, then what? you stop doing the things you did because you only did something to impress them.. that is when it becomes fake, you feel me? Just be you and stay that way. Try talking to her first..if she shows no interest in you or the conversation then, you dust yourself off and keep it moving. Good Luck and I hope things work out for you. You seem like a great person.

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