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To endure or to give up
Which is better, to stick with a relationship that has so many up and down moments due to the sheer differences in personality, religion, and God knows what else, simply because you don't want to look back and say you didn't give it your all, or to stop feeling trapped by a relationship that increasingly seems to be falling apart.
20's, male.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Time and experience makes these decisions for you.
Each person in this world has a threshold and different emotional needs. There are the easy to spot dealbreakers, like infediality and abuse, but for problems a bit less obvious then those you need to rely on your personal judgement and past experience.
If you are STIL in the relationship, it would be fair to say that the time to give up on it is 'not quite yet'.
Have some faith in yourself. When you have given all you can give and can't take any more, then you are ready to break up. When you break up, you are ready too to do it. No reason to examine every decision or wait for the 'right time'. The right time is something you have to make and decide on your own.
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In my honest opinion, it's better to lose the relationship. If it's not making you happy now, why would it later? You can't really stop a relationship that's falling apart, unless a miracle happens, of course. And if you believe in that miracle, then stay. But if the relationship is ruining your mood, causing you stress and you don't even love the person that much..then get rid of it. That's my say in this.
Good luck.
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It really depends on what you want for your life. You are 20 years old. It is almost impossible to settle down at that age. Have you tried talking with her about your differences and coming to a median for an agreement so you both are happy? If you are feeling that your relationship is falling apart she is most likely feeling it too. If both of you want this relationship and are willing to make compromises as needed for happiness, work on it. If you are both willing to make sacrifices for one another and both benefit not just one, then try to work it out. If there is no way that you can work it out because you have already tried, then let it go before it consumes you.
There are going to be ups and downs in a relationship, so I don't base my answer on that fact. I base my answer on happiness - are you happy? is she happy? are you happy together? if not, then it's best to let it go, regardless of love. Tina Turner said it best, what's love got to do with it? I am sure that people will disagree with me, which is fine, I respect their opinion. The reason I say to over look love is because I can love from a distance. I don't have to love all up close and personal increasing conflict, confusion and disputes. If the differences are that huge in variance it's not going to work anyway, so why stay in it for 10 years, possibly have a child, and then feel trapped. You are already saying the word trapped -right? Trapped is so negative, yet positive when realized.. simply because you aren't locked, only trapped which means you can find a way to get out of it, there's no key. Hope you feel me on what I am saying.
I don't believe in time being wasted, I believe in making time, not time making me! Hell, I was trapped in a relationship for over 17 years. I should have gotten out of it at the 5 year mark, I didn't. I stayed in it, because we did have children, we had gone through so much, and I wanted to stick it out - in the end, we were both abusing each other (mentally and physically later on), he was just as frustrated and tired of me as I was him but we were like that ole' Gladys Knight song - Neither one of us - finally I woke up and realized that I would always love him for the good things shared and the children.. but it was more important for me to love myself because he couldn't love me the way I wanted to be loved, or the way I loved myself.
I fault the differences to our issues - everything was completely different, which made us unequally yoked, it wasn't going to work out anyway. We had NOTHING in common except our beautiful children who are now 16,15,and 12. Guess what? the things he did that used to make me so upset years ago, he still does them today and he will always do them until the day he dies. If I would've stayed with it, I would still be unhappy today. I am so happy now, that I talk to people and encourage them to find peace, happiness and tranquility no matter what, no matter who.
Good Luck!
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