A quick note: If I answered a question and you have further questions for me, please include a URL link to your original question(s) so that I can be sure of what we're talking about. Questions that reference something we talked about a week ago that I can't quite remember are kinda hard to answer.
Welcome to my column.
I don't apologize for my answers. I speak to the audience, and in doing so I sometimes tell the audience things they don't want to hear or cant handle.
I believe in stands on principle. I believe that doing right for the sake of doing right is a good way to live. I believe in self awareness and encourage it in others. I offer the most unbiased viewpoint I have. And yes, I am only human.
Im going to tell you what I think you need to hear. You are not supposed to take what I say and follow it. You are supposed to take what I say and _think_about_it_
Oh, and feel free to ask me questions, but netspeak, ebonics, terrible grammar, and your teen angst about a crush will be ignored.
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well.. i always seem to jam my wrists and ankles in gymnastics. i always stretch and stuff but it doesnt seem to help. any way to get my wrists and ankles stronger?
thanks (link)
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Be more careful with them. Wrists and ankles are joins, you cant really exercize or stretch them much that will prevent you from jamming them.
Id say be alot more careful, you could set yourself up for issues with those joints later in life.
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I really want to have sex with my girlfriend, but i don't know how to do that and i dont know how to get past my and her parents. I am a 14 year old guy. HELP ME!!!!!!! (link)
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If at 14 you are truly ready for sex you can figure out a way past all of that yourself.
Additionally, your question is incredibly vauge. From it I cant tell if you are asking for help with how to have sex, with how to talk your girlfriend into sex, or what, and obviously we cant tell you how to get past both your sets of parents.
Wait. Seriously.
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I really need a good book to read!!!
Im 15/f so i dont want anythign short... something i can really get into
Maybe somethign about teens with problems (drugs, alcohol, self destruction)
Im really open for any kind of book
Please help! (link)
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Books for 15 year olds?
Hmm.
One of my favorites if you havent read it is the Count of Monte Cristo. Its a book about a man who has his life ripped away from him, and then seeks an elaborate revenge upon those who did it. Author is Alexandre Dumas.
October Sky is an awesome read. Its nonfiction but an excellent story.
Michael Crichton books are good. Jurrasic Park, the Lost world, Prey, Timeline, and many others.
You're old enough for the firm. John Grisham. He has a number of other books.
I dont know any in the areas you mentioned, but for someone your age alot of the ones I listed are excellent books. Alot of them are something of the thriller genre.
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I have sex quite often with the same person,we've done it mannnnny times.
Tonight i was on my period and he knew that but still wanted to do it.
So i didnt mind,so we started to do it and he pulled out with blood all over his dick
He ofcourse got extremly grossed out and ran in the shower and obviously wanted me to leave.
I'm scared that ,just that will change things forever.
Do you think that things will go back to normal? or Do you think he's that grossed out that he'll never wanna do it again? (link)
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I think that hes an idiot if he got grossed out after deciding to get his red wings.
Sex on a period is messy. Thats the way it is. Talk to him about it.
Though, just to reassure you, its not like hes not going to be horny again soon.
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On my 3rd day of the week at Hawaii for a vacation, I went to a Japanese toy shop. I love anime and I collect action figures and display them in a glass case. I bought a 12'' Inuyasha toy that was 20% off of $36. I was so happy to get it because in CA you don’t get those kind of stuff in a store you buy them on eBay. Well tonight I just got back home I live in CA. and I took it out of the box to display it and before I knew it Inuyahsa doll has TWO LEFT ARMS!!!!!! What should I do? The shop has no website but a phone number I put the doll back in the box but I like to display them I am very pissed off and I have no I idea what to do. What should you do??? If you were me???
(link)
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Theres really nothing you can do.
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iam 24 yrs old male.can i do masterbation for around 10 times a day?will there be any diadvantages for excessive masterbation?what is the actual process to do masterbation,how i have to hold my pennis?plz reply me. (link)
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10 times a day is starting to hit a point where you might injure yourself. While masturbation is a healthy activity, it is possible to do it enough that it becomes unhealthy purely because you are being too rough on your nether regions.
If it starts to hurt when you rub, take a break and give yourself a day or two to heal.
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My boyfriend and I are thinking about having sex. But before I act on this thought, I want to hear some personal experiences. Have you ever had sex? if the answer is no, then why haven't you? Is it because of religion, personal beliefs, morals, etc? But if you have, then What happened? Why did you decide to participate in sex? Do you regret it? I'm asking these questions because I want to know what everyday people think about this, because once its gone i can never get it back. (link)
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Sex is about other people. Its about you, and him.
You know, I lost it early. Would I change it? No I would not. Going back and changing it would make me miss out on a number of experiences. I wouldnt be the person I am today.
By the same token, I got lucky. Really lucky. I had my fair share of irresponsibility, I did stupid things. Nothing bad ever happened to me despite taking risks just as great as those of my class mates who ended up pregnant or with STDs.
I played Russian Roulette and won repeatedly.
Its not something I suggest. Because if you get that loaded chamber, it can fuck your life up.
A friend of mine has Herpes. For the rest of his life, he is going to face rejection because of it. He is going to have issues because of it. He cant get drunk and hook up with people (which is how he got it) because if he does he will give it to someone else.
I know many who got pregnant before 18. It hurt them, the families, and the children they later birthed.
Be aware of the risks. If you make a decision, protect yourself in every way possible. Thats the best advice I think I can give. Because no one of us can tell you if you are going to regret your decision.
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My neice is mentally retarded. We just found out. My sister was hysterical. My mom was crying. My dad was very mad/sad. I felt nothing. Is this wrong? I love my neice and care about her, but i don't care if shes retarded. I'll still love her the same. I feel bad for the troubles she will have to go through but i'm not really sad. Also i am kinda pissed about how everyone else is so pissed off. Is this good or bad and why am i feeling this way? (link)
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Their reactions are understandable.
I personally would be devastated by news like that. Because in this world, intellect is a true life defining attribute of a person. Someone who is mentally handicapped is going to have a limit on the possible roads their life can take. Finding out that your child is going to have to deal with those limitations for their entire life is definitely something that can cause grief.
You love your niece, but your sister is looking at the prospect of watching her daughter suffer and never be "normal" and everything that goes with it.
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I am a Christian but my entire group of friends is not. I want to tell them about Jesus or my faith, but I constantly find myself afraid of their disapproval, but I need to because it won't be long before I become tempted to go against my beliefs. How do I make my stand? (link)
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This is where most Christians go awry.
Read the following carefully.
"It is not your job to save people. It is not your job to force your viewpoint or way of life on people. As a christian you should lead by example and love your friends, and leave everything else at the door"
Memorize that. Learn it.
As a fellow Christian, I can say that often things do not necessarily agree with my viewpoint on the world. That doesnt mean that I have the right to change it, or to spend my time trying to make others see the light. If you have a problem with temptations that is a personal battle. Just because your friends are doing something doesnt mean you have to either. If your friends arent mature enough to accept your right to make your own decision, thats when you have a problem.
I know many people who are straightedge and hang out with people who are very much not. I am in my 20s so drinking and such is perfectly legal amongst my friends, yet some of them do and some of them dont. If someone chooses not to partake, thats cool. Personal choice man. Its what this world is all about.
God gave free will, in case you dont remember. Your friends have it too, let them exercize it. And keep track of your own.
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I am a 15 year old female and a virgin. I might be a vrigin but i do masterbate, a little too much. I can't stop. I do it once a day or even up to 3 times. I just get so horny, and try to be active a do stuff, but my hand just drifts.
What can i do? Or is there anyway to enhance the feeling so maybe I won't do it as often? (link)
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Theres nothing wrong with what you're doing unless you are injuring yourself.
Once or more a day is normal for people with a high sex drive.
My only real suggestion would be to consider investing in some kind of toy.
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so, wat exactly does it mean for a guy to "fill you up?" (link)
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Filling a girl up is a reference to vaginal intercourse. Usually it is a reference to either the act of penetration, or the act of the man having an orgasm inside a woman without a condom present.
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SORRY IT'S SO LONG!! I have been dating a momma's boy for the past three years. I've been trying to make things work but she hates me and will do anything to make sure her son does exactally what she wants. I want to move in with him next year but I'm afraid he will expect me to take the place of his mother (washing his clothes, cooking, cleaning, etc. and he's 20!!) He fulfills all of her ludacris requests including massaging her back, which he won't even do for me and I'm his girlfriend!! He won't even stand up to her after she stole his identity and borrowed $20,000 in his name!! What should I do? How can I get him away from his mother so he can grow up!!?? and for those of you who have experience with this, will I ever win this battle? Thank you. (link)
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Save yourself.
No, seriously.
Shes been around since birth. If he cant differentiate at 20 hes never going to. Unless, just possibly unless, he sees his life getting completely fucked because of his mother. Thats the problem. You want to affect change in his life, but from his perspective change isnt really neccesary. Hes probably pretty happy. His mom is happy with him. Hes got a girlfriend.
Show him that there are prices to pay for being unable to grow up. One of those prices is the inability to maintain a decent relationship. Its the only way hes going to grow as a person.
Leave him. If he stops being mama's cute little bitch, consider taking him back.
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okay there is this boy i KNOW i love. well we were going out then he broke up with me, but like i said i KNOW for a FACT that i love him. but he likes another girl. And all my friends are telling me i dont need him, but i do need him. he doesnt love me back and just every second of the day i think of him, and jsut want to be with him. but i know i cant. so what should i do, and my friends are also saying that i could get any guy. and a few boys have asked me out but i dont want them i want the one i love. so what do i do. i jsut cant get over him. he knows that i love him and he just doesnt care i guess.
so please help me .!! (link)
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This is some of the best advice I have ever recieved myself. Written by a guy who is probably far wiser than I. Read it, think about it. I went through a terrible breakup (I was dumped) recently and every time I wanted to call her or message her I read it.
::Begin::
Being dumped sucks.
It is rarely a good experience - no matter how long you've been going out, what the nature of your relationship was, or how it ended. The very idea that someone does not want to spend his/her exclusive time with you is a pretty big blow to the ol' ego.
I have been dumped on many occasions for many reasons, for over a decade. I understand that there are many who have never had a girlfriend, many on their first relationship, and many more with little experience with being dumped. Take my advice as you will, but I can guarantee you that when the day comes (and it probably will), you will be better prepared for it, and hopefully won't end up being a huge whiny turd.
I give to you:
Lushka16's guide to being dumped, and taking it like a champ.
Rule 1: The relationship is over.
This is the most important rule of all. You need to go back to it at least once every minute in the aftermath of being dumped. It is the most difficult part, yet it is also the foundation for healing. The day you come to terms with it, is the day things start getting better.
In my experience, there are three basic parts to being dumped: Premonition, dump, after-dump.
Premonition
I have been dumped, and have dumped, lots and lots of times. There has never been an instance where it is random. For every single relationshp, from shortest (2 days) to longest (3 years), there has been a period of time where the breakup is planned. For the person about to get dumped, this period is called premonition. I have always felt a breakup coming, and it is physically a worse feeling than the breakup itself. There is little communication between the couples, an intense feeling of uncertainty, and a strong desire to make it better. The longer the premonition stage lasts, the more apt you are be stupid.
Things to avoid:
Do not go beyond the bounds of your relationship. Don't start saying, "I love you" if that's not what you normally do.
Resist the urge to sulk. Do whatever it takes to get your mind away from it. Get the gently caress out of bed, go to the gym, go for a walk, find some friends, smoke some pot, do whatever it is that you do to de-stress.
Do not start screwing around. The relationship isn't over yet. You might get yourself into some serious trouble.
Don't beat her to the punch, unless you had plans already.
Things to do:
Hey, here's an idea - talk to her. "Hey, what's going on with us, things have been kind of wierd lately." Sure, it might lead to breaking up faster, but that's the point. If it's going to happen, might as well not torture yourself.
Try working things out. I know, it's easier to post an E/N thread on SA than to talk logically to another human being, but take it from me - it can work. If you really care for the relationship, and she's not cheating on your sorry rear end, there's room for work. I've found that the best times I've had were after we've worked things out.
# ? Mar 15, 2006 21:22
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lushka16
Apr 08, 2003
Doctor of Love
Dump
RULE 1
Get ready to go through the 5 stages of loss:
Denial
Bargaining
Anger
Despair
Acceptance
It might not happen in that order, it might not involve all the stages. Chances are you'll experience at least 3 of them, the most popular being bargaining, anger and despair.
Denial - Try your best to avoid it. Denial doesn't help resolve anything, makes the whole process very difficult. Remember rule 1.
Bargaining - Might as well give it a shot. There might be some things that you can reasonably change in the relationship. Give it up after a good shot at it. If it's over, it's over.
Anger - Yup, you're pissed. Get over it.
Despair - This is where the crying begins. Now is the time to NOT be pathetic. There's nothing wrong with crying, but don't make her feel bad for you or pity you. She'll only be pissed. There is little sympathy when it comes to being dumped, so don't play that card. More on this in the post-dump section.
Acceptance - Time to let go, man. Rule 1.
Here's a quick scenario as to how the whole thing might look:
Girl: Things aren't working out.
Boy: Are you sure? I thought things were fine.
Girl: No.
Boy: Well, is there anything we can do to make things better?
Girl: I just don't want to be in a relationship anymore.
Boy: But you were the one who wanted to be in one in the first place! Who put you up to this? Is there another guy? I'll loving kill him.
Girl: [insert despair]
Boy: [insert despair]
Boy: Well, if this is what you want, and if this feels right, and there's nothing I can do or say to change it, then we might as well let it happen.
See? That wasn't so bad. This is a really good time for some Q and A, especially since you'll want to know some of the answers in the post-dump phase. Here is a short list of questions you should ask now, while you're still communicating:
Is there anything I can do to make this relationship work?
Is there anything I could have done to make things better?
What made you decide to do this?
Is there someone else involved?
Is there anything I can do to avoid pissing off future girlfriends?
When did things start to suck? What caused it?
This is a very short list, and you should tailor it to your needs in the premonition phase. If you can get all your important questions answered, it will make life easier in the next phase. Also, be sure to indicate that you don't want to see/talk to her for a while. This is KEY. More on this in the next section.
Post-Dump
Nearly a decade has taught me one important thing: This is a very long phase. You need to accept this.
Ok, you just got dumped. Let the emotion out the best way you know. Cry if you have to, beat the poo poo out of something, go for a run, post an E/N thread (maybe go for a run first). Be a man, and find someone to give you a hug. Talk it through with your close friends (not hers). Set some kind of time limit. Say to yourself, "I'm going to be a pile of emotional poo poo for the next hour, then I'm going to start picking myself up." Stick to it, if you're a sulking mess for too long no one is going to want to hear about it.
Inform your friends. People ought to know to be careful around you. If they care about you, they'll help you cope. Put away blatant reminders of her - her pictures, her underwear, her lifesize blowup doll etc.
Go out, live life normally, DO NOT DO ANYTHING RASH. Joining the Army doesn't help, running away doesn't help, you won't get her back if you get into a car accident/attempt suicide, you certainly won't get her back if you vandalize her property. Don't gently caress her sister/friends, don't go beating up some kid who you think might be her new boyfriend. Use Rule 1 folks, it really puts things into perspective.
Just go on with your life. That's the only thing you can do to really take it like a champ. There's a huge list if things you shouldn't do, because they're very annoying, and you'll feel stupid about it later.
Spend lots and lots of time away from her. This is actually a strange situation. Say you spend 4 months away from her and are feeling great. The next time you see her, it'll take you back about 2 months. Then you'll recover, and the next time you see her it'll take you back 1 month. Then 2 weeks. Then 1 week. See what I'm getting at? Recovery is a long process, and there will be setbacks. Don't think it'll be peaches and cream the first time you see her with another guy. Try to avoid her socially until you're certain things are ok. This may take months or years. Rarely weeks. This is why avoidance is key. You don't need to go out of your way to avoid her, just let her know that for a while, you don't want to see her.
Don't play the pity card. Yes, you're upset and hurt and heartbroken. Tell it to your friends, not to her or her friends. Avoid putting up depressing away messages, profiles, blogs, or anything of the like. Understandably, you want her to know how much she hurt you. It does you little good to do that, remember rule 1? Don't go to the same party as her and sit in the corner looking all depressed. She's not going to want you back, you pansy.
Don't go visit her. First of all, it will hurt like a mofo. Secondly, girls are evil and will do lovely things like hug you, cuddle with you, tell you how much they miss you, or hit you with pepper spray. Rule 1 - it still applies. She doesn't want to be with you, just wants to make herself feel a little better. If she wants to come back to you, she'll call you up and say so. Being around her is most likely going to annoy her and make you feel really lovely. Girls have also been known to employ the use of a guy named Todd, who is only there to make you turn emo.
Don't start looking for answers. If you're smart, you already asked them when you two were breaking up. Don't call/IM/email/fox her friends. Yes, they're close to her and they know what's going on. Chances are, they won't tell you what you need to know. They're her friends first, yours second. I'm letting you know now - if you do take this path, you will find out nothing of any use. Do you really want to know if she's seeing someone else? Do you really want to know if she is in bed crying because she misses you? Back to Rule 1. She's going through her own healing process, she doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. Let it go, man. Her friends will report their findings to her, and she'll hate you for snooping.
On a similar note - DON'T loving STALK HER.
The above is the basic foundation for taking a dumping like a champ. There are many little nuances that I can't remember and didn't cover, so be prepared for anything. Of course, I welcome and urge the advice and experience of other goons. The only thing I can guarantee is that life will get better and you'll move on.
For what it's worth, I got dumped and quite heartbroken today, but I'm doing all right, thanks for asking.
It's almost certain that anyone who has read this and is going to get dumped for their first time will not follow my advice.
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I have been in a relationship for two years next week and I haven't told him I love him yet. I'm just not sure if I love him and if I'm not sure I'm not going to tell him that I do. He told me he loved me six months ago and I believe that he really does. I'm okay with him saying I love you, but should I love him by now? I mean we have known each other for five years and dating for two. I would think I would be able to say those three words to him. If I'm not in love with him should I break it off before he gets too attached to me? I care for him a lot, but I don't want to hurt him any more than I possibly could. Please help. (link)
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My off the cuff response is to tell you that you should end it. He is in love with you. When he says "I love you" its not just an expression of how he feels. Its a call for you to answer.
I had a girlfriend a while back whom I fell in love with. She loved me back, but she couldnt say it to me. We ended because I could not be with someone whom I loved so dearly who couldnt express the same to me.
If you truly are not in love with him after two years, end it. Its more than likely not going to change. Because hes going to be hurt eventually, and the sooner he begins to move on the better for him.
And if you do break it off, make it permanent. Do not take him back.
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Ok so I really am a slut. That sounds bad, but here's my deal. About a month ago I met this guy named Dave. We talked for a week, until he took me to this party and well...I got wasted. We woke up the next day together and we'd had sex. After that we have sex all the time. The only problem I'm seeing this guy named Carson. Carson and I have been together for four months. Bad I know. But Carson and I don't really hit it off in bed. Dave and I hit it off well, but Dave isn't someone I am REALLY attracted too. But Carson I really like his personality he just can't perform in bed well. I don't know what to do. Should I be with Carson or Dave? I really don't like cheating on Carson like this, but I'm so unsatisfied. (link)
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See the below?
"Its very good that you can accept..."
No, it is not.
Getting wasted and making choices (especially sexual ones) is not a good idea. Its not something you should brush off, because you should not throw away responsibility for yourself by getting drunk.
Now, as to the advice.
It is YOUR responsibility to choose. Is it more important to you to have decent sex right now, or to be around a guy you like but who isnt great in bed? This is a turning point to you, where you get to determine what your priorities are, and pursue them.
Determine fast. Its not fair to either to be having sex with them both and cheating. Dont sleep with either of them again until you have made your decision. Keep in mind there are two other people involved, and its your responsibility to be faithful to the person you're dating. If you want someone else, break up, and pursue after.
And at the risk of repetition, dont let yourself get so wasted that you pass out and black out and wake up to having done something you wouldnt have done sober.
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Im 14
When i was 11 my boyfriend and i broke up. He wanted to have sex but i said no so he ripped my pannies and shoved his "stuff" in. when he did that he took my virginty. I called it rape.Ever since then i have been having sex. I want to tell my mom but i am scared.everytime I have sex,afterwards I always feel like im going to get caught. The boy I am having sex with right now I like him but he just wants to be "sex buddys".I just found out one of my childhood friends has been liking or loving and talking to him for 2 years. She`s coming to fight me friday or saturday. My sister told me thar should stop talkin to him but I realy like him and I think i might be pregnant by him.
What should I do?
and how can i tell if im pregnant or not without having a pregnacy test or waiting for my period to come (link)
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You have to have a pregnancy test. Its the only way to tell.
Stop having sex. Seriously. You are far too young and started far too young. If you keep going like this, you will regret it for a very long time.
Guys will pretend they like you for sex. They will use you if they can get away with it.
You should not let them. Any guy who refuses to like you without you having sex with him is a guy you DO NOT NEED TO BE FRIENDS WITH.
Stop having sex. Give it a few years. Seriously. The next time you have sex, you should be over 16 and in love or something along those lines.
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I would like to hear some opinions on 14, 15 and 16 year olds having sex. I personally find it heartbreaking when I read these questions from these young people asking about sex and if they are doing it right. They don't even know about the other consquences BESIDES pregnancy and HPV, STDs such as STIs and emoional consequences.
I am only 20, so it wasn't long ago I was this age, and I find this to be ridiculous! What happened to true love? Or waiting until marrige? It seems to me these girls just want to be popular with the boys and the guys want to be popular among boys. Is it just me? Am I crazy? (link)
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I think that its terrible.
Honest answer.
16... the jury is still out, but generally people that age are developed enough as people to begin to understand the emotions behind sex and begin to be old enough to understand the impacts it can have on your life.
15, 14, 13, 12, some of the ages we see on here...
Children do not understand sex. They dont have enough life experience to get its purpose with couples.
They are imitating adult behavior because they know that adults enjoy it and it makes them think they are more grown up. Kids take risks that they cant really comprehend...
A 13 year old doesnt understand the concept of "screwing up the next 18 years of my life". They havent even been alive 18 years.
Its just a terrible idea. Kids are screwing up their perceptions of sex at points in their lives when they are too young to understand the damage theyre doing. A 13 year old girl who has a boyfriend and a threesome with another girl is going to have skewed views on sex for the rest of her life.
If you start doing things before you are capable of understanding them it stunts your growth.
Same thing with kids and drugs. I have pretty liberal views of drugs, but 15 year old kids developing habits... you have to learn to function as a normal person without an addiction before you can function with something that takes that risk. Alcohol and cigarettes fall into that category. My last girlfriend had been smoking for 11 years compared to my 4. She was 21.
Smoking at 10? What the fuck. Now she cannot do without a cigarette. She never learned to control that. Shes going to battle that the rest of her life.
And yeah, kids are trading sex for popularity.
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so i'm going to give my guy a blow job for the first time and he's going to return and such. i'm really really nervous.. so first off, is it normal to be nervous? and second, i dont really know what to do so does it like "come natural?"
please help, and thanks in advance. (link)
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Its natural to be nervous about anything you havent done before. Especially where intimacy is concerned.
We cant give actual procedural advice. Just google "blowjob instructions" and you'll find tons of pages.
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I've been with my boyfriend for 28 months on the 5th. I love him. I swear I do. I am currently away at college. I try to come home at least every other weekend to spend time with him. Everything is great when I do that.
But then, during the week, when I am hours away and all I have of him is a few pictures and the sound of his voice on the phone, I go crazy. I feel like I need to see him or everything just goes bad. I get strange thoughts in my head and feeling like he doesn't love me or I take the frustrations of college out on our relationship. I know he understands what I am going through, but I don't know what to do because I don't want to upset him just because I'm freaking myself out.
How can I cope without seeing him? How do I prevent myself from going crazy and thinking something is wrong with our relationship just because I cannot see him? (link)
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You tell yourself that it isnt going to last forever.
I did distance for 2 years. 36 months and some change. We were together, we were apart for that time, then back living together, because her parents required her to move back if they were to continue paying for her school. I could only see her once a month.
We both got through it telling ourselves that it would be worth it.
Sadly, the ending to my story is that after living together another 5 months, we broke up. But thats because she hit some kind of wall where she stopped being able to talk to me and the relationship disintegrated.
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i'm 16/f. i really like this guy who's a year older than me and i know he likes me too. we hang out at school some and after my soccer games. we've only been on one date - out to dinner after a game. he's not a christian, and i'm a very strong and dedicated christian. he's into partying. i'm not at all. he's already hinted about having sex, i'm for sure saving myself until marriage. i really like him, but is this too much of a risk for myself? i might be able to help him change for the better, but i might end up being brought down. i'm really not sure of what to do right now. any advice would be helpful. please give me some honest answers. thank you so much! (link)
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Hmm.
First and foremost, all guys want sex. Its a fact of life. We all want it pretty badly too.
Now, some people (myself included) do not believe in waiting until marriage. From my perspective sex and sexuality are a very important part of a relationship. I have to know that someone is sexually compatible with me and shares my views on sex before a relationship can get too serious. Its not a "if you love me, youd wait" situation. Its a "if you dont see eye to eye with me on the subject, we arent compatible" kind of thing.
Thats what you need to find out. If this guy is more like me, or more like you.
Because, while I said the above, keep in mind those are _my_ personal views. Other views are just as valid, and if you want to wait until marriage thats what you should do.
Now, he might just be horny. Guys are like that. He might be willing to wait. He might not.
I would be honest with him about it. If he is after sex and soon, he will probably run for the hills. Thats not a bad thing for you. As much as rejection might hurt sometimes, its better for you to not date him for a while THEN have this issue.
Or worse, have you give in to him and regret it.
A word of advice though. Dont try to change people. Especially in regards to sex. At 16 it might be hard to find someone who shares your views (mostly because kids in high school rarely HAVE set views on most things) but keep hoping and trying.
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