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college studentAge:
21Member Since:
April 10, 2005Answers:
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about
HEYYY :D i'm in college and i'm a psychology major. i've had many experiences with boyfriends, crushes, friends and family. i know quite alot about sex and sex related issues, so feel free to ask me anything about that! i will be completely honest because i would want the same in return.if you drop one in my inbox, please try to be as detailed as possible (like your age & gender) so i can be as helpful as possible :D
advice
ok here's how it is: I'm new to this highschool so yeah I'm a freshmen. After a couple of weeks there's this girl that I have my eye on. I don't know why but I like her,she's different from the other girls, REALLY different. I think she could be a goth. oh well. So yeah I like her but she doesn't know but I've been getting the feeling like she glances at me sometimes like when I glance back she like looks away so I think she likes me. BUT... one morning I think I saw her smoking..That's sort of a problem to me because for some reason I dislike her since I now know she smokes but I still have feelings of love.Another reason is I don't like people much if they smoke because to me smoking takes lives of people away. plus also I don't think my parents will approve of her if they found out she smokes. So right now I don't know what to do. I have feelings of hate but love for her.I also want to save her but I'm scared that I might offend her in any way. I also have thoughts on why does she smoke. Maybe its that people dont accept her. Man I'm stuck...
You shouldn't change your standards of what you like and don't like in a potential girlfriend. Smoking is something you cannot change in someone, believe me on that one. It's an addiction and it takes years for someone to change a habit like that. On top of that, she's going to have to REALLY want to stop or she won't have the willpower. You seem to really hate the idea she smokes, so maybe focus your attention on someone else and just try and move on from her. If you honestly really like her and want to try, then you can get over the smoking thing eventually. When someone really likes somebody, one flaw is not going to stop them. If you guys end up together, just ask her not smoke around you and especially not your parents. It's a good start!
My dad used to be really mean to my mom, and would treat me and her badly, and alot of stuff, I wont go into detail, but now he says he is sorry, and how he wants MY MOM bak, not really me. He just uses me to get to MY MOM. Like he willl only take me to the movies if my mom comes, and so on. But i like to be with him .But the thing is that the last 3 years i cut him out of my life, becuase he was so mean to us, and now he wants to a part of my life. I kno it is good to 4giv, but i 4 gave him so many times. I stood up 4him so many times, when no one else wud. Is this the last straw or no? Can you plz give me some advice?
You need to stand up for yourself this time. No more standing up for your father. You obviously love him and he'll always be your father, but the way he is treating you is horrible and not something you need in your life. I hope your mom makes the right decisions and does not take him back. You need to talk to your mom and discuss how you feel and what YOU would like. You are HER daughter and she should respect YOUR needs, over your father. It will be hard, but I'm sure you will be strong about all of this. No man should ever treat a woman badly and constantly leave then beg to come back. He is not acting like a father or a husband. Moving on from this will make you a stronger person, because he will just bring you down, and probably your mom too. You need to develop a strong relationship with your mother and maybe talk to a counselor in school or even a best friend. Remember - focus on you and only you and what will make you happiest in the end.
can you feel yourself gettting wet. or do you just know because of the wetness in your panties. i mean how can you know without like having to look?
sometimes you don't even know. you can feel yourself getting all 'tingly' down there when your excited but sometimes you won't even get wet and other times you will. you can tell by going to the bathroom and checking your panties, and seeing if they look wet or feel wet. it won't like leak through or anything like that!
16/F
i just started having sex with my boyfriend, but for some reason i`m not satisfied. I lost my virginity to him a few weeks ago, and tha first time was pretty uncomfortable. Now everytime we hav sex, i`m feeling nothing. (although he`s enjoying it).. is there something we`re doing wrong or is it just me?
When I lost my virginity, this same thing happened to me. Don't do what I did, because I kept going with the flow and it didn't do anything for me but he was having a great time lol I don't know if you do this or not but never PLAN on having sex like on a certain day or time because that takes away all the mystery & passion from it. But the main key here is FOREPLAY. You need foreplay to have a great sexual experience. You need to get excited and hot to a point where you NEED to have sex with him or you'll feel like you're going to explode. Start off with a hot makeout session and move slowly to taking off both of your clothes, and then go from there. If that doesn't seem to work, trying new positions couldn't hurt.
My and my "boyfriend" just broke up nine days ago. It feels like months, because he asked someone out right after he broke up with me. I was heartbroke, I was crying everynight. I'm no longer crying every night, but I still love him. I want to let him know; that I miss him & love him still. Even if he doesn't want me back. I'm thinking about asking him out again, after I get myself back together.
But he still has a girlfriend, it's completly obvious that the relationship between them won't last. It's sorta of a rebound-relationship. I haven't talk to him ONCE since the breakup. I don't want to ask him out right away. But, I don't know how to start talking to him again without it being really awkward. Help?
I went through exactly the same thing you're going through just a few weeks ago. Guys (young guys; teenage years) are CONSTANTLY and i mean CONSTANTLY changing their minds and feelings. This new girlfriend could very well be a senseless fling. He doesn't want to seem like he doesn't have anyone else, so to make it seem like he's a "player" he picks up a new girl right away. Girls dwell over why the relationship failed and ask questions over and over again while guys deal with it buy either drinking or finding another girl QUICK. The thing guys always need after a breakup though is time. Time is the biggest issue here. Do not contact him right away. Let it sink in and let him miss you, even let him realize that you have your own life. It wouldn't hurt to flirt a bit and grab a few new guy friends (there always a great help with breakup advice too). After about a week or two, text him or call him with something along the lines of "hey, just wanted to see whats up". Do not ask about his girlfriend and do not act jealous or mean. Don't bring any of your deep feelings out in the open just yet, you want to move into this slowly. Guys get scared away by feelings that are put on full blast by a girl, so keep it light and friendly. Good luck with everything :]
ok so im 13/f and ive heard of like girls getting wet and i dont know if ive ever had.like i know its like when your excited but i want to know if like you can feel yourself getting wet? and is it the same thing as discharge? because sometimes in my underwear ill find like it wet but i always thought it was discharge?
Discharge and getting wet are pretty much the same. When girls get excited & then get wet, it's NOT like a downpour! For example, if a guy you like gets you excited and you start to get excited yourself, you'll probably get wet and you'll know but it won't show. The only way a guy will know your wet is if he went down your pants, WHICH they like when a girls wet. It boosts there confidence and it's not disgusting.
Okay, my boyfriend's mom had a stroke and is in the hospital. She's not expected to make it much longer. Every time he calls me, I have no idea what to say to him. I can't really give him advice, and I don't want to say "everything's going to be okay" because clearly it's not. Any ideas on what I can say to him? I can't go see him and just comfort him because he lives a few hours away.
Just listen. Listen and encourage him to talk about it BUT don't overly ask about it. If he wants to talk, let him say all he wants. If he doesn't, change the subject. He needs you right now and later on, he'll appreciate everything you've done for him. It must be incredibly hard to watch a mother die and you being the girlfriend, he feels that you will listen and understand. Let him know how you feel about the situation too and tell him how you wish you could be there for him.
so im making a sn and im in 9th grade and i have NO idea what it should bee!
heres a little about mee:
i go by sam, sammy anything of the sort
im a girlyish girl
my fave. color is pink.
[im not really big on things like princess, queen, ect.]
XxXx's are good
same w/ xo xo
I WOULD LOVE YOU FOREVERRR IF YOU COULD HELP ME OUTT!!
sammy xxo
girly girl 2o1o
samanthaaa x0
piink is hawt
sam i am x0x
pretty in piink
ssssammy 2o1o
i put the 2o1o since thats ur graduation year :]
My boyfriend and I have had sex, but lately we’re just running out of ideas. Can anyone give me good ideas?? Because if I don’t get ideas he’s going to become less and less interested.
thanks!!
I really hope that sex is not the main part of your relationship. Trust me on this one, because if it is, the relationship will end very shortly and it will leave you broken. If he becomes less interested in YOU because the sex has gotten a tad 'old' or 'boring', than he doesn't deserve you. A guy should be interested in your mind, and your interests and everything about you. But anyway, you have the internet at your fingertips. Google a bunch of things, like 'sex positions' 'sex ideas' or anything of that nature. Good luck with everything, and protection is a SMART decision always.
well ok im really scared to go to schol this thursday cuz well thats my first day.. and im a sophmore this yr... and i've had alot of problems last yr w/ other people.. i kinda caused them.. and this past sunday this girl wouldn't stop yelling my name when i went to school to get my schedule and stuff.. and my parents thought she was being ,ean to me.. but i don't no e if she was or what... and then that day i went bike riding these guys who go to my school kept shouting my name... and they said they thought i wu z hot... its not that i mind its just that i feel like they do that b/c they don't like me... just like alot of other people at my school... so could someone help me please!!!
Well, I'm guessing you're going to be a sophmore in highschool. You should just plan out what you want to accomplish the first day and first week of school. Find old friends, make new ones & solve old problems, don't encourage new ones. The past is the past, and if anyone doesn't like you for something you did or something that happened last year, they have the BIG problem to still be mad about it and have NO life. It's a fresh start and no one has the right to judge you. You decide how you want to spend your time in school & who you want to hang out with. Each day it will get easier and just keep motivating yourself to get through another day until its summer again! The year will go by so fast..it always does =] Good luck with everything and don't forget to squeeze some schoolwork into the schoolyear! I always forget lol
ok does it hurt gettin your belly button pierced? ive heard some ppl say it does & some say it doesnt.. im kinda average when it comes to pain tolerance & ive had my ears pierced 6 times one of which i did myself but does it hurt like reallyyy bad ? and when you change the ring tha 1st time is it hard to do or does that hurt? & will they instruct you on how to? thx so much!
Well, for the pain matter - It's like getting a quick needle or even a pinch for a few seconds. It'll be red after and you DON'T want to touch it that whole day. Don't play around with it & don't sleep on your stomach for a week or two. After like 6-8 weeks, you should have whoever pierced it, change it for you. You can buy your own belly ring but you shouldn't change it yourself. Don't forget to ask tham any questions too, they know what they're talking about!
is there any way you can increase your metabolism?
Working out is a very good way to increase metabolism. I go to the gym a few times a week and noticed my metabolism sped up quite a bit. Make sure you don't just lay around all the time and just get going! Do even little things to help yourself, instead of taking an elevator - take the stairs. Remember to eat healthy too, like vegetables & fruit.
next week, it'll be me and my boyfriend's two year anniversary and i feel like he's losing interest in me. what are things i can do to gain his interest back?
Be spontaneous. Do something for him that he never would have thought you would do but something he would like also. Guys actually do love cute surprises from their girlfriends! If you two ARE indeed having sex, maybe do something sexy for him. If you're not, then take him somewhere you guys have never been. Maybe you could go back to where you first met. If he is losing interest and after the anniversary comes and goes and he still doesn't seem interested - it could be time to move on. You deserve a guy who will always be interested in you and you wouldn't NEED to do something to gain his interest back. Good luck!
When I go to college, I want to be like the girls on girls gone wild. How can i?
I'm sorry, but that doesn't sound very educational or a great goal, but it IS your life. I'm guessing be a slut, dress like one and just go crazy. Most of those girls gone wild things are filmed during spring break, in places like Mexico where girls are drunk & don't act like themselves.
okay well i have this 'friend' who was always nice to me to my face but always said stuff about me behind my back . we got into a fight that lasted about 2 months then she said she wants to be friends agian . my mom told me not to be friends with her becaause of waht she does because shes a back stabber! anways.. im sick of her doing that because she is only mean to me when shes with her friend and she will start fights with me . today [ like 10 minutes ago ] i gave her a piece of my mind and told her that she hurt me and what she does . ik what i did was right. idk what im relaly asking just i needed to tell that to someone . sorry♥
I'm not sure what question your asking or even if you are asking a question BUT good for you for telling her how you feel. She isn't a real friend and I hope you don't talk to her anymore. You deserve true people in your life, who won't talk about you behind your back no matter what.
a few nights ago i was with a friend and two older boys (3 years) weve hung out before, and this guy pressured me into haveing sex with him but i wouldnt. i dont like im or anything its just a hookup. the thing is im a virgin and hes not and then i was drunk a few nights ago and ended up doing something im starting to really regret. sex. i lost my virginity to someone i dont even like he made it seem like it wasnt a big deal and everyones had it so i just gave in. at first i was okay with it but now im starting to think.. what am i going to telll my next boyfriend? or my friends? i dont know if i should just forget about this whole thing and say im a virgin. im just getting upset and i dont know who to turn to and im not going to a councelor or anything. i guessi just need some moral support.. thank you
and no we did not use a condom, we were in a hot tub and he swore to me that he would pull out before, but we didnt even get that far into it i think. plus hs going off to college and hates kids. so im pretty sure im safe. please help thank you
No boy should EVER pressure you. He is not a good friend or a person, and I hope you distance yourself away from him and his friends. Sex is supposed to be between two very emotionally involved individuals. Everyone makes mistakes though, and obviously you admit it was a mistake. It was a bad idea not to use a condom, so please (no matter who the guy is or what he says) always make sure he wears a condom.
You have to be strong and confident about the situation. Realize that it was a one time thing and from now on, you will wait until YOU are ready, not when HE is. If your future boyfriend or your friends are any less than understanding, they don't deserve to be in your life. You sound like a girl who knows when she's messed up & wants to make things right, which shows you are mature. It would be a good idea to take a pregnancy test if you miss your period though, just to be safe. And "pulling out" is NOT a good birth control method, don't listen to guys who say they will do that (Pre-cum can get you pregnant)
Good luck with everything & be safe always!
I have this really good friend and I've known her for about 3 years. We're really close and all but i feel like I like her a little more then a best friend. I know im not a lesbian because i've had boyfriends and been completely comfortable with them. it's just that my friend is always there for me and always makes me feel better about myself. has anyone ever felt this way about their best friend? Or could i be bi? what do you guys think? (I'm 14/f.)
That's great that you feel so close to your best friend! You are very lucky to have someone so close for 3 years. If you think of her as more though, maybe you feel a romantic way towards her, that is totally OKAY. There's nothing wrong with being bi or lesbian. Sometimes girls just fantasize about another girl who is really close to them, and soon after that feeling just fades away naturally. Don't read too much into it! Just go along with your friendship like it is.
I have skipped two monthes in a row. I have not had sex. I am kind of worried. Is it normal to skip? My hormones are the same, as if I were on my period, but nothings happend for 2 monthes? Help!
Well, it's a little hard to say since I don't know your age..but anyway! It is normal to skip a few months, if you aren't regular. When I was 16, I used to skip sometimes 4 months and then get my period. If you are that worried, talk to your mom and see a gyno. I'm sure everythings fine though, and you'll get it again soon.
My friend is doing drugs a lot. She smokes weed every day and does ecstacy a few times a week. I have talked to her about it a lot, and she's not going to change. I don't know if I should tell her mom or do something else. So what should I do?
First off, talk to her AGAIN. Believe me, ecstasy is way more dangerous than weed. She could take it a million times, but then one time it could kill her. Let her know this is serious and if she does not change, you will tell her. If your friend argues and yells, resist the temptation to just let it go. Tell her she needs to stop for her own benefit and make sure she knows you love her and care about her. She will be angry at you for awhile, but later on she'll thank you for her life.
I worry about everything. I worry about high school (even though my grades are fine), college, public speaking, being myself, my weight (even though I'm average according to the scale), the future, MY future, money, getting a job, you name it. Sometimes I worry so much that I cry, even if it's worrying about something like a speech I have to present in 2 days or failing college because it's too hard. My mom gets angry when I tell her about my worries and she says that I worry too much. I've seen 2 therapists and taken medication. The medication helped a tiny bit, but not much, and the therapy didn't help at all. I'm 16. What should I do?
I was EXACTLY the same way when I was 16. I think I worried even more than you do! It is totally normal to worry about ALL the stuff you named. Being a teenager is difficult enough these days, with others trying to bring you down and.. making new friends.. losing old friends.. family issues.. grades changing.. public speaking is one of the hardest things in high school. NO teen likes to go through with that, it's a nerve racking experience. Remember, you aren't the only one worrying over these things.
Your mom shouldn't get mad at you though, because you actually want to talk to her about it. (Most teens won't even try to TALK to their moms) Sit her down and make sure you have all her attention. I don't think you need medication though. Maybe seeing a therapist once a week would be fine, so you could talk to them about what you're mainly worried about for that specific week. Once you get older, these anxieties will ease up and you're life won't seem like a big worry.