Member Since: June 21, 2005
Answers: 261
Last Update: August 12, 2005
Visitors: 16490
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I always feel as though when I talk to people I bore them or like burden them.. I feel as though everyone wishes I wouldnt be here or something.. I mean nobody really cares about me! Sometimes I feel really like i dont even speak the same language or something.. My life isnt going anywhere! I feel as though i am always doing things wrong and whats the point of even trying.. All the hope and wishes (i dont believe in anymore). there isnt any point.. I might be depressed I dont know but.. I cant seem to get this feeling to leave me.. How can I feel better? Is there any solution or anything? (link)
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Yes and no. See my colum for advice on self-esteem. That may help you.
Also, try to prusue conversation of substance. It may be that you tend to talk about things that are trivial, or even that you're hanging with people who don't like talking about the things you like talking about.
You may want to seek counseling for depression as well. It definately sounds like you're depressed.
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ok. i want a new sn! And i want it 2 do with Green Day! (link)
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Try different languages. Like, in Japanese, green day would be "midori na hi" or "midori na nichi". If you like any other languages, that is. Latin can be fun, too.
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I have writers block, I can't seem to come up with any ideas that will really work. Does anyone know of anything that might help me? (link)
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Just start writing down things that pop into your head, and let the randomness take you where it will. Or do it without writing things down, but do it out loud.
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ohk so my mom put on some self-tanning lotion but she was out in da sun now she looks like a carrot ... its looks nice though the problem is that she didnt wash her hands after now they look orangy-brown lol ... anyways any - home remedies or anything she can do to help the color go away faster ? thnx in advance (link)
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That is kinda funny. And it's good to see you laughing at the situation. ;-p
I'm guessing here, but you might try a little vinegar or alcohol. Maybe peroxide. But try it on a patch of skin that won't be visible in case it makes it look worse.
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I am getting my room put in the basement but the problem is that the room I'm going to be in has a door to the laundry room so people will constantly be going through my room. Is there a wall or divider type thing I can put between the two rooms that is cheap? If you have specific stores that carry such things, or ideas for ways I could divide the room, please tell me! (link)
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Try tall cubicle dividers. Office supply type stores with furniture should have them, or at least be able to point you in the right direction.
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okay i have thirty pets what should i do i have ten parrots and they get on my nerves thanks i will rate high and i have 7 cats 5 dogs and tons of other animals
polly (link)
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Post signs and in the newspaper that you're getting rid of some. If they're not yours, wait until you can move out.
If this is real, I'm not putting a lot of effort into this 'cause it looks borderline fake.
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Okay i have this grandma and she wants us to go every where. My mom wants us to spend the night there to night but I hate spendining the night at her house.She snores and she gets on my nerves. And I dont want to go. What are some good tips on how i can make my mom give my grandma A excuse to get out of spending the night I hate it,and every time I go over there I get a head ache and she is sooooooooooooooo boring some tips on how i can get some excuses would be great i will rate high for good answers but people that tell me what I spell wrong i will give you a one.
Brittany (link)
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Have you talked with your mom about it? If not, do that - it's about the only thing you can do - she should be able to come up with excuses on her own if she decides you don't have to go.
If you do have to go, try engaging your grandma in conversation - ask her about interesting stories from her life. You may find out she's more interesting than you thought before.
And get earplugs for the snorring. Or ask your mom to get you some, in all seriousness.
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Ok so here is my problem i have a really low self eestem i sould nt cause i hear that i am pretty alought and tons of people like me [cheak our my advice column to see pic] but my self- eestem is still really low i hate the way i look and i am never happy i feel like i can't so anyhting right and everything i do i screw up. please help me.
Reality. (link)
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I haven't been on here long, but I can't seem to figure out how to view your colum (I can't figure out how to find out who you are/your username).
Anyway, self-esteem/self-confidence/self-image is a hard one to build because it takes itself in order to build itself (if that makes any sense, then you're smart, too... are you 18+? Single? Oh, wait... I shouldn't be doing that ;-p). It's also something I've struggled with.
One of the things to do is to just forget about trying to be invisible and make moves - go talk to people, raise your hand (figuritively speaking, unless you're in class, of course), ask questions, and give answers.
Also, don't worry about the people around you - they will take care of themselves. Do what you are going to do (use wisdom, don't just jump off bridges) regardless of who's watching (again, within reason - don't undress in public or anything like that, though I'm sure you'd draw a crowd if you did).
When you make mistakes, take time to think about what went wrong, and try again. And again. And again. If that's an option. And when you succede, you will be able to succede more, and as you succede more, your self-confidence will increase, as will you self-image, and your self-esteem.
EDIT: So I just realized your usename was reality... stupid me ^^;;
You /are/ hot. And you seem to be good with advice.
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I am going out with someone that is a year younger than me and no one has really said anything to me about it yet but i have a feeling they will...i cannot stand when people continuously say crap to me about it...is it really wrong that hes a year younger? (link)
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How old are you? If he is a year younger than you and you're, say, 5-8, yes, it's a problem - there's a hugs maturity difference. Now, let's say you're middle school, it's not a problem, though the maturity difference will probably cause problems. If you're high school, it might cause problems. If you're older than high school, then you need to do some self-evaluation and define your goals/values/et cetera, because you shouldn't be asking this.
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What would you consider a make-out? Tounge or no tounge? I think my friends and i think they are different things. Can you help me? (link)
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Making out is kissing for an extended period of time, usually with some amout of toungue, but not necessarily. Kissing for less than a minute is not making out.
It also often includes sexual touching, and can easily lead to sexual activity.
I find it boring, pointless, and tiresome. I prefer kisses and kissing for short periods of time - making out without moving on is just a pain.
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Well I'm not really getting invited to too many parties. A girl named Katee had a huge party and I wasnt invited...I feel like a loser and left out....any ways on how to have more friends or something like that? (link)
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Self-confidence. Really. Up until college, self-confidence is what enables a person socially. After that, it's based on a lot more things, but self-confidence helps you there, too.
It'll also help you get dates.
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I'm 12 and a female and i really need a strapless bra but i'm only in an A.Where can I get a cheap,good strapless bra?
CD (link)
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Assuming that the 12 was a typo and you're really 13...
Chances are you don't need a bra. And you're not gonna like this suggestion probably, but oh well, I don't really care if you do anyway.
Go ask your mom (or gaurdian, if that's the case). She's your mother, she is (at least supposed to be) there for you, and your best resource for this. She's had to buy bra's since she was a teen, probably, and has more experience. Unless she's never worn bra's. In which case, go to a friend's mom.
I don't see how you would need a bra at 12 (*ahem* I meant 13), or at size A (and don't be in a rush to get bigger boobs - they really aren't that great, IMO... and they sag when you get older), but if you do, asking someone who can help you with the shopping itself will serve you best.
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Ok I would really love to go to the warped tour this summer. But we are going on vacation when the tour is coming to where I live. But they are going to be in Orlando when we are there on vacation. I asked if I could go when we were down there and my parents said no becuase it is our famliy vacation. Now we go to orlando every year and do the same thing when we are there. I dont see why We cant take one day and my sister and I can go to the warped tour. How do I convice my parents to let me go? (link)
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A few approaches...
1. Logic - intellectually debate it (which means no yelling or getting angry), point out pro's and con's, and give them a good argument on why you should be allowed to go. It's one day, they've got plenty of time to prepare for it, et cetera.
2. Tell them my story. I've always gone on family vacations with my family (until the last few years, since I am working full time and all that). However, I cannot say that I have a single even that I can look back upon and say that it was just a great event - I wasn't bored, I wasn't held back, I was free, and I just had an awesome time. It's just never happened, and now I'm at the point where I can't afford to make it happen, and by the time I can, it won't be an option. I want to be able to grow old and look back on my life and not regret not doing enough or not having enough fun, and so far, I haven't been able to fulfill that.
Keep in mind, however, they are your parents, and whether you agree with them or not, you should respect them. They (ideally) want only what is best for you. I, myself, have no idea what this tour is. They may be saying no because they think it is something that will harm you. I don't know. But whatever their reason is, I do believe they should be ready and willing to explain it to you - how else are you going to learn. So if they say no, and that's that, say to them (in your own words, or not - mine sound kinda corny, even though I mean them), "Your answer is no, and I accept that, and I am not asking this question to debate it any further, but to learn from you and your wisdom. What is the reasoning behind your decision?"
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There's a guy friend of mine that I like ... alot. Some people say he likes me but I know we're just friends. He has a girlfriend who's really nice but sometimes she rubs it in my face that they're dating even though she doesn't know I like him. Is there any way I could ever end up with him? How could I without getting her mad at me? Basically, what should I do? (link)
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First, tell her you don't like her rubbing it in your face like that. She sounds like the jealous type to me, and if that's the case, they won't last long.
You may want to tell him now, you may want to not tell him until he's single again. It really depends on him, and if he will tell her, on her.
Either way, DO NOT make any moves on him while he is with her - not only is it rude and gonna piss her off, but it's insulting to him. He's your friend, and if he's happy, then you should support him. If you make moves on him, then you are completely disregarding him and his wishes. The only move you should make would be to let him know. Telling the truth (without intent to manipulate) does no harm in and of itself, it's just how they react (which is why I say you may want to tell now, or wait).
If they have a bad break up, be there for him, and WAIT for him, and make sure he knows you like him and will wait. If they have a good break up, same thing, but you'll also want to wait for her sake if you don't want to upset her, and you'll want to talk to her about it (again, if you want to not upset her).
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I just got my hair cut and i REALLY hate it,[[long story short im not a good "hair" expert and i didnt no the difference between angles and layers..]] Is there any Shampoo or ways to make it grow faster? [[im lucky this happend on summer vacation,and not in school!!]] Also,what is the avrage rate of hair growth with in 2 months? [[when school starts]] I have fine,soft,not-so thick hair if it even helps at all. Please Help!! (link)
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Different people's hair grows at different rates, but maybe up to an inch per month (so 2 inches).
Seriously, though, I'm curious to see the haircut. You should re-post with a link to a picture of you. It may turn out that it's a really good hair cut on you, just not what you expected.
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I don't know if any one remembers me, i asked the question if i should dumb my boyfriend because all my friends said he was wearidand an @$$. Well i didn't, thanks to all you, we kissed for the first time the other night at a party now everybody is convinced that i'm on crack or something. What sould i do? I've tryed talking to my friends and they keep going on and on about how stupid i am to be going out with him. please i really need help! (link)
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Ask yourself some questions:
How do you feel about this boy?
How does he feel about you?
Do you feel comfortable with him?
Do you enjoy being with him?
Does your family like him?
Now, decide what of the above is important to >>>you
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first of all i rate high. also i no i always ask the same question but i never get a good enough answer. no makeup suggustions please. ok so the thing is that i have a big nose brown eyes a long face light brown hair a tan and a really really small upper lip. i always keep my hair down. but my question is how do i make my lip look bigger nose smaller hair better face prettier. thanx and i rate HIGH (link)
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Let's see a picture of you - it'll give us a better idea.
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I have the first symptoms of an eating disorder (yes this can be in Mental Health, it's a mental problem not a physical problem) and I'm really worried
I might sound crazy right now but there's this constant battle in my head. One part of me is saying not to do it that I should go and eat and the other is saying no! don't eat it's not worth getting fat.
I have no one I could talk to and except for parents and they would go crazy.
Ughh It's driving me crazy! I don't want to go and eat for then to realise I shouldn't have done and then go and binge and bring it all back up. Please help me. (link)
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Taking the chance of telling your parents is an option, and one that I will suggest. Though I do understand that there are times when taking things to your parents is not an option (whether it be that they are irresponsible parents or what not). Even so, it's still good to be able to talk to them.
Besides them, however, there are still other people who are available. If you attend school, your school will have some sort of couselor available. If you talk to a teacher you trust and just tell them you have some mental health related concerns and that you would like to know who to talk to about them, they should point you in the right direction.
Please understand, getting fat is not a bad thing - there are only people who say that it is, and people are stupid. You are who you are, and if people can't see beyond your flesh, they aren't worth your time. (Still try to be polite and friendly, just don't let them be the ones who decide what you should do and who you should be.)
I don't know whether you are actually overweight or just paranoid of it, but either way, you need to remain healthy, even if that means being a number of pounds over your ideal. If it turns out that you need to lose weight (which I doubt), don't purge to do so, and don't stop eating or refrain from eating enough. These will leave you crippled in the long run, and who cares what your physical appearance is if you're debillitatingly lacking in nutrition.
Lastly, surround yourself with people who love you and care about you - they will be one of the best sources for support through this.
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mushoku, i couldnt e-mail you. you must not be on aol. help. (link)
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No, I am not on AOL.
sabin_b77
AT(@)
hotmail
DOT(.)
com
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Does anyone have any tips about make up for the summer? (link)
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How about none? Really. I, personally, think a woman is far more attractive when she doesn't try to change things about herself and put on a false face and just is herself (yes, it's supposed to sound like it applies to the way they act as well).
Be yourself! You're already beautiful - if people don't see it, oh well - not everybody's gonna like how you do your makeup anyway.
Though, I do think artistic designs (like the lead female in 'A Knight's Tale' had when she wore the gold dress, I think) that are obviously just decoration, that look almost like jewelry are really cool.
Ok, you can tell me I'm weird now... ^.~
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