I am a 20 year old guy in college. I have fun helping people with any of their problems. I fell in love with this site when everybody was so nice to me and helped me fix a problem with a girl awhile back, so I'm back to repay the favor. Many times when we have problems we dont think of the most sensible answer. So if you are looking for a little insight and some help, I'm your guy!
Gender: Male
Location: MN
Occupation: Student
Age: 20
Member Since: November 21, 2004
Answers: 135
Last Update: November 9, 2011
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Missa8305
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Hey Im 16 and a senior in highschool. I met this guy in an interschool competition. He's the same age but is a senior in some other school. We started talking after the competition and became good friends. We have gone out on three dates till now. And yeah, we have kissed each other and made out a little. We cannot resist each other at all. And hence the makeouts were a mutual desicion. I am falling for him. But the problem is that even though he says he is falling for me, he keeps on telling me he cannot date me cause he's a bad guy and he cares for me too too much to hurt me. He says he is not one of those dateable guys who will love their girl completely and he might find a new girl and dump me.That would hurt me and he doesnt want to do that! He hasnt had a past record of cheating or anything it's just that he tells me he wants to be sure before he asks a girl out that he will be completely loyal to her and not flirt around with other girls. He also liked this girl a year back and he says he feels guilty that he got over her and fell for me! But when we meet we actually act like we are dating, cause he gets me stuff, he tells me he loves me, we hold hands. we actually act like a couple in love. we also talk all the time. I dont know what to do. Because I really want to be with him. But cant figure out how to make him ask me out? and if he is really a bad guy? HELP.
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He is sending you some very strange signals. First of all, why are you guys saying "I love you" after only 3 dates? Or have you known each other for a few months? That just seems really fast to me if you guys have only "made out a little." But you need to confront him. Tell him you want to date him and give it a try, and that by him telling you that he loves you but saying he doesn't want to date you are completely different points of view, and he needs to choose. Tell him you don't want to go fast (perhaps not even be exclusive right away), but you want to date him. But if he's admitting right away that he's basically a player, perhaps you need to cut your losses and get out. Because down the road he very well hurt you if he cannot be committed to you. It's something you definitely need to discuss with him, because you guys are on two different wavelengths right now.
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Have recently been dumped by my 50 year old girl friend and she will not tell me the truth why. Naturally I am devastated.
She had accepted my ring, money to save her home etc etc. We never ever met but I was completely honest as she was ? And had been for over 8 months. She still writes, says she wants and needs me in her life but it is very difficult. She is married but very unhappy. I am deeply in love with her and was prepared to buy us outright a home put it in her name and care for her all my life. I am 8 years older than her, retired and well off never having to worry over money. Have I over dine it? Sent too much Money $ 25000 or what. She was my last chance of true happiness. Please no talk of loads more out there. It took me 25 years to find her. (link)
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I know this sucks to hear more than something you did wrong, but I think in this case it isn't you, and not something you can control. From just the little bit I know, I feel like actually ending her marriage (even if she is unhappy) is really hard for her. It's something that's been constant in her life, and she'd be hurting her current husband. I was in a situation where I had to leave my girlfriend for a chance to date my best friend who I had loved 5 years earlier. Even though me and my current girlfriend were very unhappy, it was very difficult for me to leave her for a chance with my new girl. Think of the old saying, it's better to have one in the hand than two in the bush. She has a marriage right now, something she possible thinks she can stick out. Rather than just a chance with you (even though by the way it sounds, you are ready to be everything to her). I hate to say it, but I don't think it's you. That's almost worse than knowing you did something wrong.
However, I know you never met, there's a big difference than online dating and an actual physical relationship. How do you know that conversation would flow naturally, that you'd be compatible physically? You don't if you've never met her before.
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ohkay so do u think that someone your age who has most likely had sex will mostly base the relationship on sex with that younger girl. thats the only thing that id be hesistant on if i were to be with someone older. (link)
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Well sex is an important part of any relationship, but neither one of you should rush into it. If you aren't comfortable with it, let him know. If he's not willing to look past that at the person you are, then he's not worth it. I wouldn't be hesitant on entering into it just based on your assumptions that he's had sex, but talk it out with him for sure.
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heyy.. ok so im a 16f and im more interested in older guys like 18-21 and I was wondering, since your somewhere in between that age and cuz i need a male perspective.. if you would date someone who is 16 and a junior in high school ? (link)
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Possibly, it depends. Really, all I'm looking for in a girl is somebody who I can have a good time with, or have things in common with. Age isn't TOO much of an issue for me. If you're getting along with somebody who's older, let him know by flirting with him or straight up telling him that you're interested in him.
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Haha, alright. I never thought I'd be asking this question here, but recently it has come to my attention that I have a crush on one of my best friends. I've known him for a very long time but I've never really considered pursuing him until just a few days ago. But I guess I've always had feelings for him to an extent, because I love him as a person and he is attractive.
Just to give some background, he is 19 and I am 18. We live down the road from each other and spend literally almost every day together, along with a few other mutual friends. I was in a relationship for just over four years, and when we broke up (around two months ago) it was my friend, who I'll call J, that I went to. He has always been really good to me. We have a lot of the same interests and the same religious views.
Anyways, I have been planning for most of the year to attend prom with my now-ex-boyfriend. When we broke up, J agreed to go with me instead. I honestly wasn't even thinking of it from the perspective of being a date, as we went as a foursome with two other friends.
Anyways, with most of my male friends I have pretty physical relationships, but that isn't true with J. I've never really touched him outside of like, accidental contact. I don't mean physical relationships in a sexual way, but just lots of hugging and cuddling and stuff. It's how I show affection. But J and I, although comfortable with eachother, have never had the kind of relationship where we touch a lot. So anyways, since he was my prom date, a lot of pictures were taken of the two of us, and to pose for the photographs he would put his arms around my waist and things like that. It took me by suprise because I kind of assumed we'd both just stand together. But anyways, having never really touched him before, I was even more taken by suprise by the fact that I liked it. It made my stomach flip, heart race- the whole thing. I found myself leaning in to him a lot and finding excuses to take more pictures than necessary, haha.
But anyways, since then I've been mulling it over. I haven't felt a strong physical attraction to ANYONE in a really long time, so I feel like it was significant even though it's such a small thing. And I've concluded that we would be very compatible if he were interested as well.
But obviously, there's no way to know if he's interested other than asking. I honestly have no idea if he likes me, but it almost seems like he must. Not that he has done anything to really clearly show that, but.. It just seems that with all the time we've spent together, I dunno. We have a really intimate emotional and intellectual relationship- there are things that I discuss with him that I would never talk to anyone else about. I have a lot of close friends, but sometimes I feel like we don't understand eachother or that I can't articulate my thoughts to them. However, J and I understand eachother exceptionally well, and whenever we have a discussion we seem to be coming from the same place. My time spent with him is often the best part of my day. I care about him and his wellbeing a great deal and I know he feels similarly.
But I'm pretty hesitant to pursue him in any way. It's not as though I would no longer want to be friends with him if he rejected me, because I feel pretty confident in saying that I will always want him as a friend. But I can imagine how awkward our friendship would be if he said no or it didn't work out. And it would make me sad if he wasn't interested.
Another reservation I have is that although my feelings aren't new, my desire to act on them is. I guess I'm just afraid that this might be something transient.
But above all of that, I'm more afraid of sacrificing what is basically a perfect friendship for a relationship that might not be perfect. Obviously it would complicate things and I'm afraid that if we change our relationship we will actually LOSE some of the closeness we have. I've never been so shy around him then I was that night taking pictures, and I don't want to feel like I suddenly have to be gaurded around him.
Anyways, the question is obvious. Do you think I should wait a while and see if my feelings wear off? Should I talk to him about it? Should I just take a leap of faith and tell him that I want to change our relationship? Or should I do nothing? Sometimes it feels like the potential consequences of acting on my feelings outweigh the potential benefits, but at the same time, by not expressing my thoughts to him I have already changed our relationship. I've never had thoughts that I couldn't express to him before :P
Anyways, I'd appreciate any opinions, especially from people who might have had similar experiences. Thanks in advance (link)
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I actually had a very similar experience. I was best friends with a girl since I was 3, and actually about your age, I was 18 and started having more romantic feelings for her than I ever had before. Basically, we started talking a lot more than normal for a good 4 months before it ever came out. She told me that she had feelings for me first, which was awesome. It was long distance at the time and she ended up finding another guy, so it broke my heart. But we started talking and hanging out again, and to be honest, I still love her more than I ever did before we professed our feelings, even though she hurt me. I had the same reservations that you did, I didn't want to say anything because I was afraid our friendship would get really awkward. So, if you are too afraid to just come out and say it, you can still test the waters a bit, by flirting by touching him and stuff like you were doing. Or say some sweeter things that you may not have normally said. That might give him the idea, but if I were you, I'd just tell him because I would imagine he's probably feeling some of the same things. Good luck!
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I am a 20 year old female!Ok me and my boyfriend have been dating off and on for 5 years. Anyway i just found out my boyfriend has recently spent a weekend alone with his ex,and he says they are just friends but my mind tells me that its way more. How do i know if he and this girl are being intimate? Or that i can really trust him after this situation? (link)
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Wow, that's hard to tell. You definitely have a right to be jealous and suspicious. Before you go too crazy though, keep in the back of your mind that he might be telling the truth. In fact, I've been on the opposite end of this situation. I once went and visited a girl that I was really good friends with for a weekend alone while her boyfriend was out of town, and nothing happened between us. I would ask how you found out about it. If your boyfriend told you about it, then perhaps he is being truthful. If he tried to hide it, then the odds that something happened might be greater. But yeah, you're in a rough situation because its tough to actually know if anything happened. I might be careful here in placing all your trust in him, but don't throw him under the bus completely yet. Good luck
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Does eating alot of fruit really make you "Taste" better down there? (link)
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I don't have any personal experience in this area, but I have heard that strawberries make it taste better
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hi.
i realllyy like this guy and were both 17. we hangout alot but i think he just wants to hook up. we hooked up twice but we didnt have sex. im still a virgin. we madeout and he felt me up and fingered me. but now when we hangout he will comeover but we wont hook up or anything we just hangout and talk and have fun. i really like this guy and i want him to like me. he told me he liked me but then about a week later he told me he didnt and that he didnt want a girlfriend becuae he got out of a bad year and a half relationship with my bestfriend (at the time, i hate her now) but that was about six months ago. so i think he would be moving on now but anyway, i told him like a week and a half ago i was done and he could come find me when he accually wanted to be wth me cause i couldnt have him keep playing with my feelings, anyway last night he IMed me and asked if i wanted to hangout, i said idk then he said sorry for the way he acted and of course i hungout with him and we had soo much fun. i really like him, should i just continue to hangotu with him like i am and do you think he will like me if i do?? oh yeah about a month ago he said he didnt wanna go out with me becuawse he might miss out on something (so he bassicly told me i wasnt good enough) but i really like him HELP PLEASEEEEEE !!!!
Thank you and im sorrryyy its loong (link)
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Well, if you like him I would hang out with him. It sounds like he likes you now. Maybe he truly didn't want a girlfriend at that time. I'd just be careful if all he's after is sex, but if you two genuinely get along when you just hangout, then its worth going after.
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When i was younger i used to sleepwalk all the time,usually to the bathroom and ide wake up on the floor or on the toilet
when i was 11 i sleepwalked to my closet(though i don't remember doing so)
then i remember waking up to me screaming for my mom and banging the closet trying to get out
inside my head i was thinking why am i in the closet and what am i doing but i couldn't control what i was doing
i eventually busted my closet down and stood in the middle of the floor while my siblings stared at me,but i couldn't talk
eventually i said "get out of my bed",even though it was their bed,they tried to explain it to me but i just fell over them.
i dont remember doing it but i had apparently gotten up right after and walked to my bed
this has happened a few times and i was just wondering about it
i hear most people don't remember,not to mention while doing it and thinking in their head wtf is going on
or screaming (link)
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Not exactly sure what you are asking, but I will tell you about a couple of my experiences. I used to sleepwalk a few times when I was younger, the last time came maybe when I was 12, which was the most bizarre. I woke up at about 3am and ran and jumped in the shower. I distinctly remember thinking I was late to school and needed to get ready. I just stood there (didn't soap up or anything) for about 15 minutes until my dad came to see what I was doing. I woke up out of my trance and realized what was going on and went back to bed.
Another weird one I had was when I was maybe 7. I got up and walked to my parents room, turned on their light (probably at about 3 am again) and started asking them questions about food. Just really weird stuff I guess. I remember waking up and realizing I was standing in their doorway for real, I thought I was dreaming at the time.
It must be fairly common in younger kids then, I actually thought that my experiences were unique. Like you, I don't remember going to the shower or going to my parents room, but I remember waking up and thinking "where am I, what am I doing?"
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what a a good running computer speed, for example the speeds they hav at schools. i'm thinking about buying a computer but how fast of a harddrive or processer should i get? (link)
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Depends on what you want to use it for and how much you want to spend. Believe me though, if you go the cheap way, you will probably regret it in the end. If you want it for music, I would definitely suggest a bigger hard-drive. Mine's 111GB and I have like 1/4 of it free. Also, the bare minimum you want is a 512MB, but get more. There's nothing more frustrating than a slow computer. I got a DVD burner originnally, and didn't think I'd need it, but now I'm really glad I got it. I basically got exactly what I wanted (top of the line at the time). It was like $1500 and I'm still using it 4 years later without any trouble. If you get a crappy computer though, you'll be upgrading sooner than you'd like.
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where is the clit in the vagina? and don't tell me to go on to google and search it. Because then it will show up on the computer. So can you just tell me here? (link)
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Men have been wondering that for eons.
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Iv been dating this guy for almost a year now&&i dont know what to get him for his 17th bday. i want something nice,the price doesnt matter. i was going to take him to a concert but there isnt any around that time. Can anyone help me think of something?? (link)
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Video games if he's into them. Or, you can find when his favorite band is playing near you, and give him the tickets for his birthday, even if the concert is months away. DVDs are always cool too. Or offer to cook him dinner and have a night to yourselves.
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what are some good ways to get a shy guy to come out of his shell? (link)
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Just start asking him a bunch of questions if you know him. Like obscure stuff that will make him think. Like "what's your favorite color? why?" Force him to give more than yes or no answers. Just be nice to him. If he's a shy guy, he's also a nice guy and prolly wants the same in return. Just spending time with him and talking to him will get him out of his shell. I'm a pretty shy guy, and if a girl did all of this for me I think eventually I would come out of my shell.
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Hello I wanted to ask you a qucik question, I am so scared to get my wisdom teeth pulled, I am crying about it right now just thinking about it, I'm not scared for the segery I am scared for them to put me asleep. Also do they have to put an iv in you and if they do why? I hate needles is there a way around that? any advice would be great thank you so much (link)
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Hey, dont worry about it. I was freaked out too, but it wasn't as bad as I thought. I'm not a fan of needles either (in fact, I wont give blood because of it), but it wasn't a big deal for them to put the IV in. Also, they just start asking you questions and have you count, and the next thing you realize, you are awake and your teeth are out! The worst part of the entire thing is the fact that its hard to eat and it hurts if you accidentally bite down on your empty spots with food. Its fine if you're nervous (cuz I was), but take it from me that everything will turn out ok and not as bad as you are imagining.
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Mmmk, so I'm going to college in a few weeks' time(I live in a tropical country so summer is officially over here).... My question is, what do I expect in college? I have no idea how it really is to be a college student, especially as I'm the first one in our family to go the the best-est university in our country;). They say it's 'sweet torture' there but I really do not know what I should do, say on the first day, how to deal with terror professors, etc.
So pleeeeeaaaase.... Give me an idea of the goins-on in college and perhaps, some tips on how to "survive" in college.
Thanks! (link)
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College is awesome. I'll be a senior this year, so I have quite a bit of experience. It's the most fun you'll have in life, but probably also the most work you have done so far. In high school, you get worksheets and busy work and then a few tests, so its easy to get good grades, a lot of times without even trying. In college you actually have to study and read if you want good grades. But friends come really easy and its a lot of fun. As for tips on how to survive, watch your weight. I dont know if you've heard of the freshman 15, but they say every freshman gains 15 pounds. Other than that, its really not as bad as you are making it sound. You should be excited about college rather than nervous. You're independant now!!! Have fun. Feel free to ask me any more questions.
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well when i plug it in to upload songs to it,lets say i made a new playlist and wanna put only that playlist on it..it puts that playlist but deletes ALL of the other songs on my ipod..so i have to put ALL the playlists on all over again including the new one which takes too long..how do i just add a new playlist without having to do it all over again? thank ya! (link)
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You cant have individual playlists on an Ipod (except that "on the go" one that you can only make on the Ipod itself). You have to make an Ipod selection list or whatever you wanna call it, and then make it so Itunes puts that list into your Ipod. THen whenever you get a new song, you just put it into the ipod selection list and it'll update when you put your Ipod in.
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Do laxatives really make you lose weight? does it stay off. i know its not healthy but can former lax. abusers tell me their results. and the pros and cons. (link)
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Laxitives actually don't take anything out of your body that you wouldn't have expelled in the first place. It just softens everything up. All they do is speed up the flushing out process. So It won't help you lose weight that you wouldn't have lost anyways. So It might help you lose a pound or two right away, but it will just come back as soon as you eat again.
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My boyfriend doesn't know how to kiss!! It's slobery, he actually licked my face!!! It's so weird!! I don't want to kiss him! I don't want to kiss my own boyfriend! I've tried giving him hints on that he uses too much tounge (i couldn't breathe once!!) But I have never told him directly. I don't want to hurt his feelings, he loves kissing, he even said so the otherday. And I hate it, it's so wet and slobery! How do tell him without hurting his feelings?
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I think you should just confront him about it. Just say "you use too much tongue when we kiss." But then say "i wanna show you how I want to be kissed." and then tell him you wanna practice a lot right now. Initially, he might feel bad or embarassed, but once you tell him you want to practice, it'll turn into a good time. Plus, he's never gonna change if you dont tell him
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ok i play my guitar alot and i use all sorts of tuning i just started playing a heavy sorta of club metal track called "one good reason" by celldweller (if you want to look for the real song it is on need for speed most wanted's game playlist.. any ways to so say for starters i dont know what the tunings are called bu i know they all are the same as drop D if you get my meaning. the song is played like if you were to tune it to drop D then to drop C then the one under that its real low sounding anyways it sounds like hell on my shitty amp i have got would any guitar effects pedals or somthing help me out? because at the moment what ime playing sounds fat and flopsy lol any help with technilogical or tuning problems please help out (link)
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I have the same problem, drop c sounds horrible for me when I tune it, even though i know I've done it right. What I do is just tune it to drop D, and then play every note on the tab 2 frets lower. It sounds exactly like Drop C songs. Of course, if you have any notes with open frets or on the first frets in Drop C, it is impossible to play those in Drop D. So that's kind of a drawback. Lemme know if you hear anything else better cuz I'd like to know too
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I would never ever buy a computer over a laptop.
What is your personal opinion?
I think it is better to wait a couple of months more so you can gather a little bit extra money to buy a laptop especially since they are as well upgradeable.
Wich are the most reliable portable computers? (link)
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If you are looking for performance (for playing games) or size of the hard drive (for storing a bunch of music or videos) do not get a laptop. Laptops are really more for school, and they are very convenient to drag around everywhere you go so you can do your work, or surf online at a friends house, or whatever. But the performance can be pretty bad with them (even with top models). The size is also annoying when you want to have a big playlist on them. If you are into music, you'd have to buy some decent speakers for it too cuz laptop sound sucks. It's basically personal preference and what you will be using it for, but I would go with a desktop. They're cheaper anyway.
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