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Found some weird porno on umm boyfriends computer
I found disturbing porn on my bf's laptop, what should I do about it?
My boyfriend and I have been together for a whole now Recently I was using his computer and was trying to remember the name of the website he always uses he wasn't answering his phone so I decided to check the history I found it along with some disturbing porn. I found all types of porn he is 25, SO I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH HIM VIEWING. I'm just saying that because many people may think I was mad that he did that, I'm not. Infact, he hasn't looked at barely any porn since we got together. What disturbed me was the nature of the content. Such as women in chains getting beaten badly then effed. And more disturbingly incest porn like brothers and sister doing various things So much disturbing material. I have to wonder if he'll ever be satisfied with what is considered normal sexual behavior and normal looking women that don't have fake breasts, etc. I find what he viewed werid and I don't know how to mention it to him or what to do about it please help :(
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Omg yes my husband watches incest porn, rape, and loves anime porn. At first I was reading and went to look at answers hoping to find an answer to help me to. Yeah I don't like the answers none! They just say oh its fine if he isn't watching it now Bull! My husband knows tricks. You got to think its pretty easy to clear certain history on any site like YouTube Google search and more. I'm not saying don't trust him I'm saying look for signs. See when I found out my husband watches incest I brought it up ASAP! And guess what came out he had sex with his stepsister. Yeah and she won't admit it and feels the need to make fun about it like :( yeah you know he still believes we had sex haha) every single time I see her. So yeah you never know what can come out.
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I appreciate that you find it disturbing. Major, reputable studios who produce adult scenes will just not go near violent acts, and you will not see even the simulated (fake) beating and humiliation of the female models, never mind actual violence. True, a macho tough guy and rough-looking sex with a 'slutty-looking' girl may feature but even this is handled in such a way that the viewer is in no doubt that it's a consenting adult thing with no real malevolence. And although two similar-looking models might get a scene title and write-up to the effect that they are sisters sharing a boyfriend (for instance) you will NOT find mainstrean studios ever presenting scenes which even simulate/suggest sisters having sex with their brothers etc. Which means that your boyfriend must have deliberately sought the scenes from the (many) amateur sites and contributors. Now fantasy or not, a guy who likes seeing women beaten and humiliated is NOT guaranteed to endear himself to a real-life partner (meaning you). So I see where you are coming from entirely. It may have been a bit of curiosity or the lure of something a bit extreme/different. I believe there is a difference between attractive models in adult scenes and violent (sado-masochistic) scenes. We do not of course pardon child-pornography because it is only images. So is an interest in violent and incestuous sex also a signal of intent too? Does a guy watch mainstream porn, fantasy-based as it usually is, and think the models would NOT be at all desirable in real life? I doubt it, or they would not watch! You would do well to mention the subject to him and have a chat. And have a think about how he seems to regard women in general. Clearly you do not wish to get involved with someone who harbours ambitions to realise such thoughts or thinks it is OK to brutalise women. Or who thinks they enjoy it. Or who is very controlling. Look at in in the light of his entire personality, consider any historical acts you are aware of that either set a precedent or might betray a controlling personality. It may be harmless fantasy, watched and now part forgotten...or it may signify intent. Tough call, but only YOU can make it.
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Well, honestly. You say he doesn't watch much porn since you've been in a relationship, so that's always a good sign. And you've got to keep in mind... porn is like sex to the nth degree. No of it is realistic, and one can't assume that just because someone likes watching something like bondage or incest in porn, doesn't mean they want to partake in it. He's dating you, not his sister. You've been dating for a while, and never had he asked to put you in chains or beaten you, has he? I don't think you need to worry about it, but I can understand the concern. However, many people watch violent movies, yet that doesn't lead the average civilian to be a murderer. Porn is fantasy, not reality!
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I would not be too upset with your boyfriend taste in porn. Porn viewing is not always a wish for reality but more of a fantasy. Something much like we were all taught that what we watch on TV and the movies is not real but entertainment. It doesn't mean that if you and your boyfriend are in a sexual relationship he wants to put you in chains and beat you. There are all sorts of porn on the web. You name the fetish you will find videos and stories about them. Most men use these fantasies as material to masturbate too. They are things they would never want to do with their wife of girlfriend though for masturbation purpose they are great.
Now one thing I do agree with the previous writer is that key in every relationship is communication. If you believe this relationship is one that could turn into a long term lifetime relationship or one you would like to turn into a life time relationship. Then you and your boyfriend need to communicate to and with each other on a number of subjects, sex being just one of them. What you need to communicate with each other is about you past, your families, your non sexual interests, your values and goals in life. Your sex life, interest, fantasies, views on, porn viewing, what you like, what you don't like and what you might be willing to try are a separate conversation altogether and should take place fully clothed outside the bedroom.
Since sex is a big part of our lives this is a conversation that should happen early in a relationship. Everything should be up for discussion. By everything I mean likes and dislikes in bed to whether joining a nudist club is something you would ever want to experience and everything in between. If you two are having intimate relations then there is nothing that should be too embarrassing to discuss between you.
Talk about the "disturbing material" you saw just understand one thing. What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom and nothing that happens between two consenting adults is weird. The operative word here is "consenting."
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There are many things out of the realm of what most of us would find normal in sex. Besides what you shared, there's peeing and pooping or throwing up on each other in sex play. Gross to you or me, but gives some people a turn on and aroused enough to orgasm from it.
Most people who engage their imagination in pursuing such things get the thrill simply from it being so outside of the norm, or seeming dirty or bad. And there is no desire to carry out these fantasys in real life.
If you are dating boyfriends in order to find a future husband, this is an area you both need to discuss early in the relationship, at the point you want to become sexual with each other.If you already are, its not to late to start up a convo about each other's fantasies. And are any of the fantasies desires to carry out in real life? Whats each persons fetishes, what turns you on about each other, and what are your libido's like, do they match. If one wants sex way more than the other, theere will be trouble. If a partner wants to coerce their mate into trying their bizarre to you fantasys, then you wouldnt be a match either. there's no forcing a change in this area.
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