|
What should i do about her?
Hi a while back she dumped me as a friend and we are no longer friends anymore:( A while back i was kind of okay with not being friends. Now i am getting really sad and jealous of her being friends with my other friends on facebook and in real life. everytime i see her i feel sad and i miss her sooo much. Yeserday i saw her it was the first day of school i was scared to see her i hide behind a teacher so she would not see me. but i think she and her friends saw me. Her friend was talking very loud for some odd reason. Then today i was another friend of her she did not wave back to me when i waved to her. But i saw another friend of her she said hi to me when i waved to her. My question is why am i a bad person to her why does she hate me for i did nothing wrong! please help
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I don't really know the situation here, but I can tell you, you don't need a friend like her. A true friend doesn't leave you hanging and doesn't ignore you like how she does to you. I'm sure you can find better friends. You should surround yourself with positive people, not people like her.
]
When you understand what the dating process is and what it is for, then perhaps it will make it easier for you to go move on when this cycle repeats. It will still hurt but you won't be left trying to live in the past.
So plain and simple, the process of meeting someone, feeling attraction, start talking to, want to learn more about them so you beginning spending time with and dating, is a normal life process where the objective is to learn how to relate to a member of the opposite sex, discover what you like and don't like in a person, and you are looking for a solid friendship as well as a chemistry between you as far as romance goes. When young people start the dating process and someone leaves them, the breakup makes them think something was wrong with them or its something they did. Whether the other knew why they split or not, it doesnt matter. What people will do is leave a relationship when they dont feel enough in common or there isn't enough romantic attraction.
If you meet a girl where you do feel attracted in a way you want to hold her hand, put an arm around her and kiss her, be aware that there is such a thing as New relationship energy. Its the excitement of something new like a toy you got at Christmas as a little kid. And like the toy, the excitement over the person you are seeing can fade away after a couple weeks to a couple months. This happens only when there isn't enough real chemistry between two people and yet so many are afraid they will not find anyone else that they latch on to the first person who will date them and don't want to let go, even if they aren't perfect for each other. This happens so often that people with anything in common or chemistry marry every day and thats also one reason why there is so much divorce these days.
So, no one hates you. At a young age, people just don't know yet how to act or treat a person after they break up. If you can be comfortable with the situation and see it as part of the large learning process it really is, then in time hopefully the more mature of those peers of yours will feel comfortable around you on a social level, treating you nicely when you have to interact in classes or where ever you might run into them. They may not become friendly buddies with you for the sake of the person who broke up with you. There is nothing to feel jealous about. Jealousy is only an emotion we experience if we fear losing something. So do you fear that you will lose all your friends? If your friends can be grown up enough to spend separate time with you if they like you and separate time with her, and think they must have to choose or side with someone when there is no situation to be taking sides over, then those people are not people worth having as friends. Friends stick with you through thick and thin. So don't worry about something that might happen. Enjoy every day as it comes. When you are relaxed, you will begin to draw new friends and perhaps discover a new girl to learn more about.
]
Well if she is mad at you, then you had to have done something to make her mad. Why did she break up with you?
Maybe something happened in the relationship that she really didn't like and never told you about it.
Anyways, you guys are broken up. There is nothing really to do. You should just stop trying to wave at her and just try to move on. Moving on is really hard, but in this case, you're really gonna have to. You have no reason to be jealous of her being friends with your friends. She's allowed to be friends with whoever she wants and there's nothing you can do about it, so being jealous just won't help the situation.
Just keep yourself busy, go out with friends, enjoy your life and start trying new things and meeting new girls. You're going to miss her, but you need to let her go.
]
Hey!
Don't drive yourself nuts :) I think there was probably a miscommunication between you and your friend. And when she dumped you - you were okay with that and you didn't try to find out why she was dumping you.
From what you have said, I think she's hurt - because of whatever she thinks you said or did. I think you should try and talk to her and find out where things went wrong in your friendship. She might be a little miffed in the beginning but I think she will eventually tell you where things went wrong. Try and work it out with her. Tell her you miss her friendship and that you feel bad about how things ended between the two of you.
Try calling her at home and talk to her if talking at school is not possible. You can even drop in at her home one day surprising her and talk it out. But whatever you do, you need to do it fast since you've already lost some time.
Good friends are like gems and are are hard to find. I hope things work out between you and your friend. All the best! :)
]
More Questions: |