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I've got a crush on a guy quite a bit older than m, any advice?
I'm a thirteen year old girl, slightly insane. I have a neighbor/friend named Jonathoan. He's thirtytwo. He's a conspiracy theorist, and, although his ideas might be a little out there, I don't think they are all definitely wrong. We like the same kind of music- greenday, the beatles, matchbox 20, etc. We both enjoy learning, and want to know the truth about everything possible. He's funny, and nice. He isn't some weirdo who hangs out with little kids, I'm just kind of odd, and prefer to talk to adults over kids my age. The point of my story? I have a bit of a crush on him. I, of course, haven't told him, and don't plan on acting on my feelings.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Not liking him is about not being around him. You like him. Assuming this stays completely innocent and he's just a nice guy who talks to you, I don't see that changing any time soon. That's just kind of how it works, we like people we like until they give us a concrete reason not to. If he's a decent guy and acts appropriately towards you at all times, where exactly is he going to give you a reason not to?
So your choice here is to deal with it silently or find someone closer to your own age to talk to. Or, you know, someone you're just not interested in.
Alternately, actually, third option. Find someone your own age to date and crush on. If you're dating someone else you probably won't be crushing on him.
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I'm not sure what you're asking. You already don't plan on acting on your feelings, which is good.
It's not wrong to have a crush on an older man. But it's wrong to act on them, and you already know that.
Are you asking how to get over the feelings? Or how to deal with the feelings? Or if this is wrong?
It is weird for him to hang out with you a lot. Although he may not be doing anything wrong, it's just weird even if you both may have a lot in common.
So just get control of your feelings. I'm really not sure what else to say because I'm not sure what you're asking.
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I agree with Kitten, If you don't plan on acting then why are you asking? Are you looking for approval?
This man is an adult, He is old enough to be your father. You are a minor, It would be extremely wrong if you both tried to do anything. He could be forced to register as a sex offender.
Date someone your own age
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There is nothing wrong with having a crush on someone older than you as in a teacher or coach. Having a crush on a total stranger sends up all types of warning flags for me as I am concerned for you well being given your young age.
I will temper my remarks with this. The fact that he is a neighbor hopefully someone your parents know and approve of you talking two may lower those flags a bit. If he is not someone your parents know then this is a big red flag.
It is very unfortunate that in todays world there are people out there that on first look seem harmless and they may be. Time has proven that someone who spends an inordinate amount of time with someone your age is not harmless. They are pedophiles.
They gain your trust by talking with you. Then once they have your trust they invite you to, maybe go to the store for an ice cream or something. Maybe the first time you actually go for ice cream. But at some point they hurt you.
I know how you feel liking to talk with adults as I was like that too when I was your age. That was 5 decades ago when times were much different then and everyone knew everyone else in the neighborhood.
My advice is you make sure your parent know of and approve of you spending as much time as you may be with him. Check the sexual register to see if this man is list as a convicted sexual predator.
It is just not right for a 32 year old man to spend a great deal of time with a 13 year old girl. The problem is not you. The problem or my concern is with him.
I'm not trying to scare you. You are young and your maturity level leaves you open to someone who is out to harm you. I may not know your name that does not mean I would not be hurt to read about you or hear about you in the news.
Please make sure your parent know and approve of this man.
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If you don't plan on acting on your feelings, then what exactly is it you would like advice about?
If you could just click 'additional info' and write out what you want advise on, I will help you.
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