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I am young and should have friends but don't really want them?
I am 27, I am an introvert and I also suffer from depression.
I have no friends, I have not had real friends in about 3 years now. Each time I think of the idea I seem to shoot it down. I even had oppertunites to hang out with a few people and I find myself with very little interest in proceeding what seems to be no more then hi and bye. I ask myself " Why aren't. I interested in friends?" I can't seem to find a real valid reason other then they are drama and always hang out. I am young and should have friends but don't really want them?.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
you are an introvert.its one of the common problem of introverts and i had this too.try to find things that seems interesting to you.now look for people who are also interested in that.then you can be friend with them and talk about the things which makes you both interested.i know introverts are not conversationalists but try to talk.its a good idea to choose an extrovert as your friend.because introverts like to listen people talking than talking themselves.so extrovert people can help you as they likes to talk.
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I know the feeling I'm on the same boat but then you get lonely and wish you could go out with friends at times too. I know this might be a dumb question but are you afraid to be with people cause some are and that's why they isolate themselves from others that aren't family I mean. People who don't like to be with others suffer from depression and if you go years like that you will eventually have suicidal thoughts and it would just go down hill from there. You don't have to make a big change just start a little at a time.Even though you are probably happy to be alone you will like to have some friends eventually some people you can go to when you need to get away from family if you got problems and want to share them among others your age. Also your friends could help you find that special guy too when you would like to find him can't really depend on the internet cause people can lie. I hope I helped you some good luck.
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You sound like a very independant person-which is a positive thing as it means you are fully able to find your own happiness.
However, something has to be doen, because the fact you've got no friends DOES bother you, else you wouldn't've asked this question right?
It could just be that because you're introverted, you find it a struggle sub consciously to do the whole getting to know people proccess. I'm the same, you see. Most kids are taught by their parents example how to make friends and stuff, but I was never 'taught' as I always had by twin to rely upon.
It could be that you don't know anyone who's so much like you that you want to be bothered talkng to them-or maybe the people you normally see are just boring.
I don't think theres anything wrong with you-despite it being the human nature to be social, I guess there are some exeptions.
My advice would be to work on your depression, as this will not be helping you. I would say then to work on being an introvert, but this is never going to happen because extraversion/introversion is a pre-disposition, mostly inherited that we can't change. But hey-if you look hard enough there are lots of introverted people out there to.
Obviously if you want to continue friendless then dont follow my advice, but I presumed you didn't because you asked the question. THe main thing is to not be friends with someone for the sake of 'having a friend'. I think it's important to have a few close friends to get you through the hard times-but if you really dont want any then thats your choice at the end of the day.
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It's two problems not one that you are dealing with. The problem with not wanting to make friends or let people in is a paralyzing fear of rejection or them not liking you in the long run.
There's no need to be shy with people. You have a ton of qualities even if you don't see it yet that people desire in a true friend.
These people text you and invite you places because they genuinely want to know you. Most would be saddened if they knew how difficult it was to allow them in.
The second problem is depression. I know a lot about mental health and this area. I have to be brutal with you. Your depression is handling you and running your life and you're not handling it or fully in control but need to be.
It has full control and will continue to screw you over in the friends and lack of department unless you address your fear of people, lack of interest in others and what is holding you back from functioning normal in that area.
You need a psychiatrist (a new one as current hasn't helped) and perhaps a change of treatment and medication as it will equal a shift in thinking and ability to live how you want.
You need to tell him/her everything you just told us about inability to make friends and lack of interest in people at all as well as shyness and how long you have lacked any friends. It's not right but you can fix it with help.
You do need help and a doctor who will make you aggressively deal with it and depression. That's the key. Don't deal with therapists as they have no training in this or ability to handle mental problems. This is a job for a psychiatrist to support you with. Be open and honest and share this info with them.
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