|
Is it acceptable to have swimming classes in PE not separated by gender?
at my daughters schools from 6th -10th grade, in PE she attends the swim unit and boys and girls have
it together? Why is this allowed? Wouldn't this make girls feel uncomfortable
and give boys an opportunity to harass and humiliate girls? And cause
distractions and goofing off among everybdy? Not to mention young boys will be around girls shirtless which I think is inappropriate for young girls to be around of.
My daughter keeps saying she does not care but she is young and may not understand how wrong this is
this just seems wrong especially at school.You are at school to LEARN. Not to
goof off. Like it or not swimming is a class to workout and learn. Can't really
do that well with young boys and girls together. How can schools be so clueless?
can people really say honestly that young boys and girls will concentrate on swimming while they are around each other in bathing suits and not goof off? That boys (who arent known for sensitivity) won't use this opportunity to harass or tease girls? Seems kind of like a naive way of thinking to me
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
There is NOTHING wrong with it. The only thing wrong is people/parents like yourselves inflicting your puritanical self-hatred body issue beliefs on your children. All you're doing is creating issues for your kids that aren't actually there. Of course boys and girls can be together for swimming, how ridiculously narrow-minded you are to think there is something wrong with that. Don't screw your kids up by pushing your 19th century ideals on them! While you're at it stop gender stereotyping people as well. Girls are just as capable of insensitivity as boys. It's your responsibility to raise your kids to be the sort of people that don't "goof off" (who even talks like that?)
]
This question has been asked numerous times, I am not even going to bother to lay out why or if thus should be allowed.
Fact is, It is 2013 and things are not what they were 5/10 years ago.
]
I too have answered this question from you in the past. My answer will not change.
It was perfectly normal 50 years ago when I was in school to have coed swim classes. The girls had separate changing rooms from the boys and there were both male and female instructors in and around the pool to make sure everyone and everything was done safely. Nothing had changed 30 years later when my son took swimming classes.
I have to ask you if you are so concerned about swimming classes at school do you not allow your daughter to go to public pools? Public pool are far less structured and safety is left up to a couple of college student acting as life guards. As for what she sees in the pool at school she see far more at a public pool. At school all the boys wear tank suits and the girls wear one piece suits. At public pools anything is allowed as long as it does not violate community standards for decency.
The teachers are far better at controlling the students from teasing or harassing one another then any life guard is at a public pool. Remember they are in school and subject to the discipline a teacher may hand out for teasing, harassing or goofing off. Your daughter is far safer from this type of problem in the school pool then in a public pool.
My advice is you are being overly concerned about something you need not even be concerned about. I would understand if your daughter were complaining but she is not. She needs to grow and learn how to handle different life situations. The concerns you have if they were valid gives her the opportunity to learn how to handle them under the supervision of a licensed teacher. What more can you ask.
As parents we cannot wrap are children in a bubble and expect then to grow into functioning adults. We have to let them grow and experience life as it is today. Our job is to be their and offer advice when needed and to correct then when they make a mistake.
From the way your complaining you are living in a time when children didn't wear swim suits at all in school pool. Of course the classes were not coed. Come in to the 21st century and help your daughter deal with life as it is today.
]
You have asked this question at least seven times over the last two years.
You've received a lot of good advice and opinions. You've been told that this is not an abnormal practice and that being put into these situations is part of how young people learn to be respectful of others even in these situations. Your own daughter has told you she is perfectly comfortable in how these classes are being run.
If you, as her parent, still feel strongly about this, then take her out of the class. You have that power.
But for goodness sake, whatever you decide, DECIDE and then let it go. Either decide to allow your child to continue to participate, or decide to remove her from the class. Stop dragging this on and on, questioning her and antagonizing over it.
I can't imagine how stressful it must be to be in your home if you are willing to drag out this topic for years! How difficult it must be for your daughter that you are unable to make a decision and live with it. How difficult it must be for your family to watch you debate and struggle and torture yourself over something that isn't a big deal.
Either remove your daughter from the class, or don't.
Either way, make the choice and make your peace with that choice. Continuing on in this way is not kind to anyone, yourself included.
]
Think of it this way. They don't segregate kids at swim lessons or public pools. Like those pools for learning there is always a certified instructor and life-guards.
They are not going to allow people to goof off and do anything remotely unsafe. If they see kids at school being harassed (which isn't likely) or doing anything remotely sexual harassment they'd expel the kid from the program. The school would have a ZERO tolerance policy on that. If concerned ask them.
Let's say you had her at a public pool or even your own pool the proper attire is a bathing suit and no shirt for males. At those pools that's not inappropriate at all. Same at school. Does anything bad happen there? No.
Your fears aren't rational. You really are making problems for your daughter where there are none. She says she's fine with it and nobody is bugging her so let it be unless an issue arose and trust her teachers are on-top of that class and will not stand for humiliation and any BS.
If you relax and let her partake you will see that she is learning and can handle things and seek help if she ever needed it. If you pull her out over your fear she will be a massive target for bullies wondering why she isn't in the class.
The whole won't they lose focus if they see the opposite sex in a bathing suit is nonsense. The instructor won't put up with that. Sure there is curiosity but once they see everyone in proper attire or male without shirt they'll soon get over it as everyone in the pool will be that way each class.
I think you should relax and just let it be and if your daughter comes to you later on (which she won't)with concerns or wanting out of the course deal with it then but everything will be fine.
]
I think that if it is a problem for your daughter, then you should be concerned and bring it to the school's attention. But your daughter said she didn't care. That means no boys are harassing or teasing her. She learning just fine without the class beu=ing separated by gender.
And another thing: KIDS ARE KIDS. They're supposed to goof around and joke. It's your job as a parent to trust that you've put your son or daughter in the capable hands of a teacher who will stop everything if anybody goes over the line of appropriate and inappropriate school conduct. Also, some of these kids are starting to go through puberty so it's should be understandable that they might make a few jokes here and there. As an adult you should not try to mess with the natural order of things. Just LET THE KIDS BE KIDS.
I hope this helps.
~Andrew~
P.S: Not every boy is insensitive towards girls.
]
I know it is uncomfortable as a parent or adult or guardian to have their child, who is probably going through puberty, in a swim class among boys who are also doing the same. I wouldn't say that it's humiliating for girls. Both genders have an equal opportunity for being teased. Guys are just as much a target as well as girls.
Swimming class can also a place where kids can interact with one another, and so is school. They tend to do their own share of goofing off whenever they get the time to, inside and outside the classroom. In all honesty, that is one of the reasons why these after school activities exist in the first place...so students can interact with one another while not in the classroom setting.
No child wants to get teased and I'm sure the students themselves know that. Honestly, young boys and girls can concentrate on swimming while being friends with one another as well. Not all young boys are insensitive and it isn't right to generalize them.
You have to also look at the possibility that an all girls or an all guys swimming team can also lead to teasing and harassment. Harassment from the same gender can permanently scar a child's perception of body issues just as much as harassment from the opposite gender.
Thus, is the possibility that something can happen, and a concerned adult should always be aware of that, but that falls into the category between adult-child interaction. Will your child come to you if he/she is being teased?
Also, I'm sure the students would have to wear appropriate clothing for this activity too.
My advice: keep a positive mind but be vigilant about the situation.
]
More Questions: |