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am I ready for this relationship?
okay i'm currently 16 I turn 17 in july
I really love my bf and he telling alot of people thagt he believes
i'm the perfect girl he is too 16 almost 17.he tells me that he is ready to settle down and that he wants to get married and have a kid.I really love him alot and yes he does smoke weed and cigarette and yes my parents know he does.he is a really good guy but something is holding me back he is a bit controlling like he gets mad if I talk about other guys and if I go a full two days J seeing him he threatens to take his own life and then he says that we need to runaway and get married idk I love him and always will it's just thode two things that's hurting me
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Hahaha. Kids man. Ok so here it goes. Braiden is right. This dude is a chump. Seriously using that I want to kill myself if you talk to other guys routine. Yeah he's ready to settle downa nd make babies. First off, babies cost a lot of money, most of which he will spend on buying munchies for all the 420 he's smoking. You guys are really immature and he's an idiot to treat you like that. Just wait, in a few years, I'm sure you will be dating someone else and tired of his crap. Don't do anything because he wants to. Girl this is your life. You have to be in control. Seriously think about it. He's manipulating you. He's using you. If you ask me, all those traits and the fact that he's jealous, he isn't worth it. Move on and find someone better and worthy of you. Save your time and energy. This is going to be an ongoing battle that leads nowhere. If I was you I would have been gone like yesterday, nope I mean the day before, oops I mean like last week. Hahaha.
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This isn't a matter if whether your ready its a matter of what is right for you. Anyone who threatens to take their life is not only a manipulative ass but someone who has severe jealousy issues. The fact is he does not trust you, Relationship without trust is no relationship at all. You are 16, Why are you and your boyfriend even discussing marriage and children?
The main source of the problem is he is manipulative, controlling and jealous. He is not someone that is a healthy person to be with
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The question should not be "am I ready for this relationship?" The answer to that question is no, not at this time. The real question I see in your writing is SHOULD YOU BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS BOY?
What is causing you to feel doubt, what you say is hurting you, is actually a warning signal and a good one that this boy is not right for you. Learn to listen to these signals as you grow and go out into the adult world.
That fact that he is controlling is not good. Imagine a life where every time you stepped out the door you would have to give an itinerary of where you were going and when you would return. Now imagine when you get home you have to account for every minute you were away from home. At the moment he is threatening to take his own life. IF you are living together he will be threatening to harm you. o the research on battered women and you will see I am correct in what I am telling you.
Smoking cigarettes is not that bad but smoking weed is illegal and might lead to something worse and or stronger. This would only add to any rage he might have as a controller and place you in more harm.
Being this way now means he will only get worse. The longer you stay with him the more he will try to control you and the more danger you will be in. My advise is to find someone else for a BF. There are many more boy out there who will treat you with love, affection and the respect you deserve.
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To answer your topic question, I don't think you are. Its not you necessarily, its mostly the guy who thinks he is ready to marry and have kids.
You are a bit young yet. But, threatening to kill himself & being controlling are immature to say the least.
I think you know all this already. If you have to question it, its not right for you. Who knows what might change in the future, but right now is not the time.
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The most important thing you need to ask yourself is if you could seriously see yourself living with him every single day for the rest of your life.
I'm assuming that you both live in your parents' houses. If you lived together, you wouldn't have a home to run back to when you two get in a fight. That would be your home. All the things that put you off about him now like smoking and threatening to take his life will still be there, but you'll also find many other things that you don't life about him. That sounds cynical, but that's how all marriages are. It's not just about cuddling and having sex every night and having babies; it's about finding someone who can help you and support you as you make your way through life.
I don't know if that's how you feel about him, and I have no right to judge your relationship. I do think it's a good idea to wait a few more years before you seriously talk about marriage. It's a really important time in your life where you're just figuring everything out, and maybe one of you will decide they want to go out of state for college or something else that would separate you two.
I'm not really sure what your question is, but if you want to talk about this with me, my email is always open :)
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