So I'm not a bad kid. I'm a 15 year old girl. I'm a good student, I got all A's last year and I do not smoke, drink, or do drugs and no sexual contact. I work hard in school and horse riding. I try hard to please my parents. My parents did hit me and spank me with a belt when I was younger. I'm not bad to my parents, sometimes I may talk flippant however the meanest thing I've said to them is that they are annoying. They get mad at me and offended by the smallest silliest things. They hit me and insult me, and I have lost a lot of respect for them. I cannot take it anymore and I've started cutting as of late. I honestly never thought I would I thought that it was stupid and pointless but I guess now it somewhat helps as stupid as that sounds. I have contemplated suicide a lot. I'm so depressed and alone and I have no one to talk to. I don't know what to do but my realtionship with my parents really sucks and there's not much to do to make it better and I don't like living this way.
Writeratheart answered Friday May 25 2012, 7:08 am: You deserve so much better than this.
You're right, you're not a bad kid, and it does feel hard, I'm sure, but don't give up just yet.
It feels so bad when they talk like you're not good enough. But you have to remember that just because they think that way does not mean it's true. It's hard right now, but I promise it'll get better. There are organizations, people who can help you, those who will recognize how wonderful you are and give you the love you deserve. You're not alone, please don't think that. Parents are never perfect, but remember that YOU ARE NOT THEM. You're better than that. You're smart and sensible, and you'll have so much to live for later on. Don't destroy your life for them, it's not worth it. Don't let them ruin you.
I have parents who are a bit hard on me too, and in times like those, I realized that what I need isn't other people like friends, but myself. I need to believe in myself and have faith in my strength and determination. Remember, YOU are in charge of your own life, YOU will choose what to do with it, YOU can make something amazing of yourself, if you just keep holding on.
Best of luck, and I hope this helped.
I'm cheering you on. [ Writeratheart's advice column | Ask Writeratheart A Question ]
kristamikele answered Tuesday May 22 2012, 1:22 pm: What you describe could be normal teenage angst, gone terribly awry, or it could be something more serious. Either way, summer is approaching, and soon you wont have school to give you some time out of the house...summer can be the most stressful time.
As hard as this sounds, you must find an adult, either in your school or in your family, that you can trust. It is hard to trust, but you must be strong enough to do it. You need to talk to that person.
Start off by confiding that you have lost a lot of respect for your parents, and that they hit you. It is difficult for us, on the other end of cyberspace, to know if your family is suffering with some real dysfunction, where an adult who is closer will be able to pick up on cues we cannot. [ kristamikele's advice column | Ask kristamikele A Question ]
adviceman49 answered Tuesday May 22 2012, 11:14 am: By asking for help you have made the first choice you needed to make before you can be helped. Before I offer suggestions on how to get that help lets do something about the cutting.
Cutting is dangerous and is actually a cry for help in part and away to relieve the stress which is a cause for the depression you feel. What I would like to do is substitute for the cutting. Find the biggest thickest rubber band you can find and let it hang from your wrist. When you feel like cutting yourself snap the rubber band against your wrist. This will provide the same relief the cutting is providing and you don't have to run and hide to do so.
Now as for help with the depression. You are old enough by law, Federal Law, that you can seek medical treatment without parental approval.The law is called HIPPA and covers anyone 14 and older.
From what you have written you are probably depressed. Not unusual for your age. There is actually a medical diagnoses called teenage depression; caused by puberty. Puberty and the new hormones and physical changes happening to due to puberty, especially to girls, causes stress. Stress causes depression. we'll call this internal stress. Depression causes us to see things maybe not as they exactly are and could be the reason for some of the things you wrote about. This causes more stress. We will call this external stress causing more depression.
When I was your age, many decades ago, doctors did not recognize this as a treatable illness, they called it a phase. It is an illness, actually a medical one as even though you have all those new hormones you don't have enough of one or two of them to handle stress. There is help in the form of medication and talk therapy. You take the medication generally for a year or two and the talk therapy for as long as you feel you need someone you can talk to in strict confidence. Your therapist will never tell your parents, or anyone else, what is spoken about in therapy.
If you're feeling suicidal pick up the phone and dial 911, help will be sent to you. If you are not actively suicidal at this time call your doctor and make an appointment to see him or her. Tell the doctor what you wrote us and asked to be screened for depression. Once your doctor screens you for depression he or she will know what and how to treat you. Your doctor may refer you to a psychiatrist. Do not get alarmed at this The psychiatrist is the best doctor, who is also ans MD, because the hormones that are insufficient, secrete in the brain. You are not crazy or manically depresses, just this doctor is better trained to administer and monitor the medications you may need.
nobody475353 answered Monday May 21 2012, 5:38 pm: I know exactly how you feel... My parents are a little extreme in things and my mom has ended up dragging me down the stairs... The worst thing I ever called her was a jackass and I still regret it... My father works all the time and I can barely see him without his face buried in a computer... My school absolutely sucks and I've been bullied for the past 2 years... I cut myself 5 times and I've thought and thought about suicide for a long while... But I will have to go for no in suicide... After thinking a long while all I did was ask god to either help me or kill me... Either way I'm fine... As long as I don't have to make the decision myself... [ nobody475353's advice column | Ask nobody475353 A Question ]
alexisgirlie answered Monday May 21 2012, 5:37 pm: You sound like you're missing meaning in life, and that's a key contributer to depression. I just came across a very inspirational quote that you really need to apply in life "sometimes you have to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve". And what do you deserve? You deserve the most meaningful and incredible life, with lots of love and wonderful friendships. You deserve the recognition of your every dream. Fight for your rights! I was hospitalized twice for suicidal ideation, I suffered from severe depression, I used to harm myself out of the unimaginable suffering, and I was put on suicide watch multiple times. Today, thanks to the incredible help I've received, I'm really happy and love my life! So I'm here to tell you that you will survive it, but it's impossible to deal with this alone. Please go get help for your depression. You shouldn't be living like this and aching so so badly that you take it out on yourself. Self injury is never a solution, and the lives of people who do that are unbearable as they are currently being lived. I am a living example that even after facing death in the face so many times, and every muscle screaming out that you will never love life again, it is possible to love life and actually look forward to the future! You won't believe how the right medication and therapy will change your life! You owe it to your very special self to get the help you need so that your life is as wonderful as you! If you need further advice on how to survive this, feel free to e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Good luck :) [ alexisgirlie's advice column | Ask alexisgirlie A Question ]
kayna answered Monday May 21 2012, 5:32 pm: I am so sorry. Noone should ever have to go through that. It seems like you are such an amazing, kind, hard working young woman and you deserve more respect. You give your parents respect they should respect you as well. Abuse isn't just physical it is emotional also. Seems like they are breaking you down and hurting you. Everyone needs a compliment here or there and u aren't getting any recognition for your great accomplishments. You need to call the police immidiately. You are getting both emotionaly and physically abused. Do u have any family members you can turn to? If so go to them. Do not kill yourself. You are on this planet for a reason. You seem so brilliant. You may not think anyone care for you but I am a stranger and yet I still do not want you to kill yourself. You have a future ahead of you. You can be so successful and prove your parents wrong. Prove to them that you can do great things. Live. Enjoy it. You have it rough but there is so many other that have it worse but yet they are still fighting. Find someone to talk to. Get help [ kayna's advice column | Ask kayna A Question ]
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