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Afraid to Masterbate...
I'm 14 and a girl and I think I really want sex or the touch of someone else. I think about it a lot and I sometimes dream about it. I know I am really young so sex isn't really the best thing...I know about masterbating but I am afraid to touch down there. As in like skin to skin. Like using my finger. And I don't think I am comfortable on putting some house hold object up there either...and I definatly can't get a dildo. I need help...any adivce?
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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Trouble Reaching Orgasm?
Your sexual urges are normal, but the secret is managing them so as to not cause any unwanted outcomes.
There is nothing wrong with using your fingers on your clitoris to pleasure yourself. Do it and the orgasms will help you cope with your urges. Masturbation is not dirty, perverted or anything else the religious hustlers might tell you it is. It is just good natural fun and 100% safe.
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I think that you are to young to be having sex I understand that your hormones are having an effect on your body right especially since your 14 your curious about what it's like. There is no way at 14 you are fully able to understand the consequences of sex. what if you got pregnant you wouldn't be able to raise a baby on your own since you can't even get a job at a fast food restraunt and there is also alot of stds out there.
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You have nothing to be afraid of.
It's just another part of your body. If anything, worry about washing your hands before and after, but otherwise, go to town down there. There is nothing wrong with wanting to know how your body works and enjoying it.
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well its natual to touch oneself. go ahead it wont hurt you. as u touch yourself you will, find out what feels good and what does not, most woman I know just lightly rub there clit. thats the hard little man in the boat, at the top of your slit, if you dont know were it is look at yourself in the mirror.. and sex is not the answer. lots of time for that when you are older and more able to make that choice. take care
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Hi, I'm I am old enough to be your grandfather and I hope the wisdom that comes with age will be helpful to you.
Lets start with there is absolutely nothing wrong or sinful about masturbation. Most all organized religions, including the Catholic Church, condone masturbation. Contrary to what some parents may tell there children you will not go blind and you will not grow hair in the palm of your hand. You think I'm joking, there are some parents that do tell their children this.
Masturbation is a natural way to release the pent up hormonal urges you are experiencing from puberty. The slang for masturbation for a girl is generally called fingering, for a guy it is generally called wanking, or jerking off. What ever you want to call it as long as it does not become an over riding compulsion there is nothing wrong with it.
Masturbation is the safest way to relieve your sexual tension. It is also the best way to learn about your bodies own sexual needs so that when you are ready for sex and mature enough to enter into a sexual relation you know what you what from the relationship in a sexual manner.
When you wish to masturbate you should go to your your room, close and lock the door, so that you not be disturbed. Dim the lights, put some relaxing music on, undress and lie back on you bed. As you relax and get into it let your other hand caress your breasts and pinch your nipples. Allow this hand to roam over your body. In this manner you will learn more about your sexual needs and increase your pleasure.
I agree you are too young to be thinking of having sexual relations. Many of the girls that write to us and many of the advisers have said they regret losing their virginity as young as they did.
While you have not asked for this, I am going to include a link to a website I would like you to visit. It is a site that answers the question: "Am I ready for Sex." I think all teenagers should look at this site and I found it when answering that question for several young ladies who have written to us.
The one thing the site does not say that you should keep in mind. Young males are driven and programed to mate as a way to deal with pent up sexual energy. They confuse lust with love. Do not let a young man push you to do something your not ready for just because you are afraid he will find someone else that will. There are other ways to satisfy his needs without having intercourse and the possible pregnancy that could come form it.
When you are ready for intercourse always have the boy wear a condom and you should be on birth control for at least 30 days before your first sexual intercourse. The condom is only 85% effective in preventing pregnancy when worn correctly but is 100% effective in preventing the transmission of the HIV virus and STDs. Birth Control Drugs are 99% effective in preventing pregnancy. End of Grandpa lecture.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location).
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I would not suggest acting on your feelungs with another person. Youre really young & at your age I did, & I regret it.
If youre scared to put something up you, there is another way to masturbate: clitoral stimulation. If you
dont know where to find it, its between your 'lips' before the opening, kind of wear the bone is. It looks kind of like a little pearl, & it gets bigger when your aroused. Play around with this area, see what you like! Make sure you use a little spit or lube to keep it a little wet.
hope I helped! My inbox is always open
x sweeethoney
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Hello,
I hope my answer will let you think about something else to do with masterbating.
For a start, you are 14 and have hormones changing in your body. Thinking about sex is normal, but acting on it isn't always a good thing.
Touching yourself doesn't hurt physically, but I have found it to be a real problem, because I became really preoccupied with it and wanted to do it so much. This still goes on now, and even though its only once a day or every few days, and that doesn't seem like much, it is so annoying and I wish I had never started. I guess like a person who wishes they had never started smoking.
I really seriously recommend just trying to relax and understand that everyone at 14 thinks about these types of things. Try to get a new something to do to keep you busy, like a new sport or craft or anything really that you have wanted to try! Getting busy is what stops your mind from thinking about masterbating, and getting busy is helpful!
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Well if your scared to put even just your own finger near that area, why would you want some one else to? You have to be comfortable with your body before you'll be comfortable with any one else. Also, your right, sex isn't something you need to be worried about at 14. I was older when I gave away my virginity & I definitely regret it. So I would highly recommend that you wait until your 100% ready.
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