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How do I convince him to wear a condom when I am already on birth control?
19/f.
I'm still a virgin but I'm planning to have sex soon. The thing is i've been on birth control probably for 2yrs now for my period and other things. I'm afraid that the guy will be like "ohhh we don't need a condom your on birth control!" but I definitely want to be as safe as I can and use both. I know the guy shouldn't care if I asked him, but I'm a bit worried. What if we're in the moment and I'm like wait do you have a condom? And he's like no, we don't need one. I'd feel like a total idiot but I'm not doing it without one!! I know guys hate wearing them but better then getting pregnant right? :)
So basically, how can I convince him (if he doesn't want to, i'm not sure yet..) to wear a condom even though I'm still on birth control?
thanks!!:)
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Maybe give some free advice about: Condoms?
first of all buy your own condoms and have them with you. that solves that and if he doesnt want to wear one he doesnt want to have sex. Be foward no condom no sex and if he refuses then dont take a risk
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Well if he doesn't know your on birth control, you don't have to tell him. But if he knows just sternly lay down the law that there will be no sex with out a condom. If you really lay down the law, and he doesn't think you will easily change your mind, he will definitely agree and choose sex with a condom, rather than no sex at all.
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simple...dont tell him your on birth control
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Drop the STD line.
First, you haven't said "boyfriend" or "dating" once. So that makes me think you're not going to be dating the guy you sleep with (yet?).
In that case, the RULE is "no glove no love". He's not your boyfriend. If he doesn't want to use a condom he doesn't get laid. You should not compromise that safety.
I just finished a course on human sexuality. Did you know that over 95% of new AIDS infections happen to people between the ages of 13 and 30? That teenagers represent the highest rates of syphilis, gonorrhea, and herpes transmissions in the world? You're right at the beginning of the target age group who get infected with something, and the most common way it happens is in situations you're contemplating doing.
If it is your boyfriend, and you've been dating for at least 6 months exclusively, then go get tested together. You do it because you can find it cheap or free and because you make it into something to do together for each other, even though you're a virgin.
My wife and I use spermicide and pill contraceptive. It's about the same as using condoms and birth control, only we don't have to use condoms. I'm not going to lie, they reduce sensations alot on both sides. Once you have sex without a condom you won't like them any more than guys do. IF you're with a guy who you've been with and trust, I don't think there's anything wrong with getting tested and forgoing condoms in a long term monagamous relationship. Once STDs are out of the way, there are methods other than condoms which can be used just as easily. A diaphragm is another, works well with birth control.
But if this isn't a boyfriend you've been with for six months, condoms are required.
I keep saying 6 months. Why? Because certain problems can take up to that long to start showing symptoms or show up in blood work. If you don't know he's been celibate because he's been dating you, then use a condom.
The solution here is to buy a box of regular and a box of magnum trojans, and to keep them hidden in your sock drawer. Put two of each in your purse when you go out and might be having sex (the second is in case the first breaks, or you want a second round). Never, EVER bring the magnum out until and unless he's too big for the regular or he comments that he usually uses one. If he fits in it you'll get to it. If he doesn't, you don't want to make him feel inadequate or start a "so why do you carry giant condoms in your purse" conversation where he starts thinking that you've been fucking guys with bigger dicks.
Guys at your age can still be kinda immature about subjects like that.
You'll feel like an idiot. Ignore that. Stick with the rules that make sense when you're both not naked, and bring condoms with you just in case he "forgets" or actually genuinely forgets or something.
Also, if he pulls a condom out of his wallet, pull yours out. Condoms in wallets degrade from heat and friction quickly, and likely won't protect you from shit. And having condoms yourself means you can forgo the "why we have to use condoms" speech and jump straight to "you're using one, you don't have a choice about it, and if you try to leave without fucking me AND using this condom I'm going to hit you"
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Well this is were you'd say "No glove no love!"
Although you may be on birth control, Anything is still possible and all it takes is ONE time. Just to be on the safe side you can always buy a 3 pack of condoms at a sex store and slide them in your purse. There certainly isn't no way out of that one, Remember guys sometimes think irrationally. You be the one with the brains, A condom and birth control is as safe as you are going to get and good for you for being smart.
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There's one easy way; tell him the muffin shop is closed unless he suits up!
Don't feel like an idiot. You simply want to protect yourself from an unwanted pregnancy and potential STIs. If he's enough of a jerk to feel that his "comfort" is more important than your safety, then you should not be having sex with him, because he's not worth it.
Most guys, though, have no problem with it whatsoever. If anything, they're all for it. It means that you're taking care of yourself, which is good for them!
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I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you may have received and may continue to receive from others.
A condom is more than just for birth control; condoms are the primary method for preventing the transfer of STD’s. While this may be a first time sexual experience for you, is it a first time sexual experience for him. If your partner is not a virgin and you are not using a condom then you are having sex not just with him but every partner he has had unprotected sex with as well.
Your partner should respect you enough to have a condom with him and to use it when the moment is right. You could also keep some condoms in your purse for just that time when the moment strikes. You should never feel like an idiot asking your partner to take the proper precautions so that you can both enjoy the moment.
Sex between two adults, at 19 you can call yourself and adult, is a beautiful thing. It should be enjoyed and for a women’s first time, cherished. You cannot enjoy sex or for that matter anything else if you are worried about the possible consequences. If you have not prepared yourself with condoms and your partner does not have any it is perfectly fine to call a stop. A reminder here; stop means stop, it does not mean to go slow, it does not mean for him to pressure you to continue, it means he stops. If he pressures you or forces you then it is no longer consensual, it is rape. A woman has the right to say no at any time, even after intercourse has started. Please remember that.
You are not the first women to write to this site prior to having sex for the first time. Because of this I have done some research and found the following website.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location).
This website is for women and deals with are you ready for sex and what you should know and do before having your first sexual intercourse. You might find it helpful to look at before you and your partner have that first sexual intercourse.
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