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parents won't get me a new phone!!
Sorry, I didn't really know which category to put this in. I'm a 13 year old girl. My friends practically live for their cell phones and change them at least twice a year (everybody in my grade does). I don't know about other countries, but where I'm from, new and updated phones come out nearly every week. My phone is around two years old, and it's seriously old and outdated. I get good grades and I'm pretty responsible. .It might be a little silly, but I feel embarassed with my phone and feel pressure with my friends.My parents think phones should be emergency-only. Are they being unreasonable or am I?
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I am not sure if you are going to like my advise because I would probably sound like an old man. However, truth is always truth even if it sounds outdated. First of all, the phone that you have (and even if you did not have any) does not add or take away anything from the person that you are. Your phone does not represent your personality. What represents your personality are the qualities (moral) that you have in you. If your friends pressurise and embarass for the phone that you have, well, tell them directly you do not appreciate it. If they continue to make comments about you having an outdated phone, I guess they are not worth being your friends. Why have such friends who judge you on the basis of a mere communication device? You are an infinite times more worth than that. I understand that it is extremely difficult to hold to the principles that I mentioned above given the circumstances that everyone in your grade are used to having a new phone every year (because I have been through a similar situation). If you think it is not possible to surive their as the odd one and do not want to lose your friends, you have two options. Either you should convince your parents that you need to change your phone with an updated one. You can try to convice them by saying you need a new phone not as a showoff but rather to be psychlogically relieved. Tell them it is going to prevent you from being psychollogically under pressure and your friends embarrsing you. Tell them being under pressure for a phone will eventually have serious impact on your grade. Tell them you don't want to lose your friends and be lonely and depressed simply because of an updated phone. I think if you can present your arguement in an honest and wise manner, your parents will give you a new phone (afterall you are their daughter and they surely love and care about you). If your parents do not agree to give you a new one, then it is probably time to start saving as much money as you can. I understand, for a 13 year old girl, it is not an easy thing to save money. But you have to give a try. Please don't lose hope. If nothing works, try holding to the principles I mentioned above (that is the best although not the easiest). If you can honestly build your dignity, none of your friends will dare to bother you about this issue. I also think you can make better friends than the ones, infront of whom, you feel embarassed. Search for them. Once again, your phone does not make you a great person. As far as being unreasonable is concerned, I think, you (given the circumstances you are in) as well as your parents, are right from your own perspectives. So don't think too much about this. Hope I helped you.
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I think both of you are being unreasonable. for your parents they don't want to spend a lot of money. for you, you just want to follow the crowd instead of being the leader. how about you get something before any one else has. then they'll want to follow behind you.
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At 13, you aren't expected to get it on your own.
What we have here is a sense of entitlement. Its not really your fault, its something you learn from your environment.
Sense of entitlement means that you feel like you deserve things you don't actually deserve.
In this case, alot of your friends get new phones regularly and because you do well you should get phone updates as well.
That logic doesn't work. Most people have cars, but that doesn't entitle you to owning one yourself. No one magically deserves something that other people have.
But the thing is, your friends don't "deserve" those things either. They are lucky to be provided them. Its something most teens don't figure out until they move out and start paying their own bills. When you can't afford ANY phone and wish you just had a crappy prepaid you start to understand how lucky you were to have a phone that you didn't really have to do anything to own, even if it was 2 years old.
Again, its not a perspective you've had the opportunity to see yet, entirely not your fault. But you are off base in thinking that you deserve a new phone.
Want that phone? Change tactics.
Your parents recognize something many don't, that you earn what you get in life. I think they're trying to teach you that.
Go pick out a phone. Find one with a decent number of features thats a reasonable price.
Then go talk to your parents. Tell them that you would like this specific phone, and you want to know if theres anything you can do to earn it. Tell them you know you can't afford it and you can't exactly go get a job to earn the money, but if they were willing you'd work it off somehow.
This will give you great experience in bargaining with your parents (and with authority figures in general).
Its at this point you bring in the fact that everyone else has one. Explain that you know that some kids just get bought things by their parents. Tell them that while you don't expect a new phone every time a friend gets one, you would like to update yours every once in a while, and its a goal you're willing to work towards.
See how that goes over. If they offer you a deal, take it. Even if its a bit unreasonable. The first time (and for an expensive item like a phone) will be a test to see if you follow through. If you do, it will be alot easier and probably with alot fewer conditions that you can get stuff out of them in the future.
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Mmmm Hun,
Im sorry to tell you this
but your kinda being tha unreasonable one.
1) Be happy you have a phone.
2) If you really want a new one, then try saving up money.
3) If there really your friends they wont care if you have sumdumb phone,or even no phone at all.
Just being real here :)
Not tryin to be mean
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You are.
Since the economy is so bad, people aren't making as much & it's harder to afford the luxuries that we once had. So, either your parents cannot afford the phone, or don't see it's necessary that you get a new one when the one you have works just fine.
You do not deserve a new phone just because you get good grades & are responsible.
If you and your friends are on the same network & your network involves a SIM Chip, either ask them for one of their old phones, or deal with what you have because your parents don't sound like they're letting in, and I don't blame them.
Phones are privilege, not a necessity.
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You and I both know that money is tight for most families, and if it isnt now it will be soon. Cell phones are expensive. Sit down with your parents and ask them what you could do to work towards a new phone (ie. extra chores around the house). if that doesnt work, there are some pretty neat phones out there with pre paid plans. save up your money from birthdays, holidays and stuff, and get your own phone.
Dont worry too much about what people think of your phone hunny. I used to hate that i didnt have a phone at all, I got one... and now although it is convenient, it can be distracting and a hassle. Keep in mind, it is just a phone, and cool or not... at least you have one
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They are not being unreasonable. Thier prespective is perfectly valid.
If this is something that is important to you, start to save your pennies. It would be a bit unreasonable of them to deny you spending your own money in a way you felt was important to you.
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