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Boyfriend wants more
Well, the other day I was talking to my boyfriend and he asked me "how far I wanted to go". To be honost, I really don't know. I had planned to stay abstinent until marriage, but I know that as I get older, I might lose my current, or future, boyfriend if I don't want to do very much sexually. I mean, I don't know. I'm only 14 so I think i'm to young to be "sexually active", but it seems as if everyone's doing something like that.... I just don't know what to do...are guys going to pressure me to do this stuff when I get into highschool? I guess i'm just afraid of being the last person considered "prude". Thanks, any advice welcome.
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Well, at least you know that your a little young for sexually activity!
Good for you. Now...if your like me and have morals your doing the right thing to stay pure until marriage. If he was a good boyfriend he would understand.
And I hate to say it..but yeah they will pressure you to do that kinda stuff especcially when you get in high--school!
Just stay strong!
Hope I helpled
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Well why would you want to be with someone who would leave you if you didn't want to do anything sexual?
I mean you're only 14 and you have so many other opportunities to find someone you love and then if you decide, to lose your virginity to.
But don't make such serious decisions about this kinda of thing just because everybody else is doing it... I mean I know you're curious and it's exciting to think about and everything but it's WAY more special if you wait... trust me. When I was 14 my boyfriend at the time kept begging me to have sex... I felt weird and uncomfortable, which is how I knew I wasn't ready... plus the fact that he was pressuring me showed me that he didn't respect the fact that I didn't want to do it.
but now that I'm 18, I look back on it... and I'm so glad I waited for the right person. Plus boys at that age are immature so you have to be careful. A lot of times when they get what they want they end up becoming really bored and they move on.
Being "prude" to others is better than regretting this situation 5 or 10 years down the road ya know? I mean no one's gonna care... the older you get the more people mature and learn to think for themselves.
I hope you do the same and make the decision you feel is best for you.
good luck.
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Okay first of all I think it is great that you realize and think you are too young to be sexually active, but do not let what other people are doing change your opnions. Being a virgin is not something for you to be ashamed of. You should only decide to have sex if you are ready for that commitement, its a big responsibilty. You also shouldn't decide to do it just because thats what your boyfriend wants you to do, if he is going to push you into something then he isn't worth it.
Yes, guys are going to push you when you get to highschool. Peer pressure can be really hard to work with, but you just have to realize that you have to do what you have to do.Don't compromise yourself for anyone, stand strong with what you believe in and if anyone tries to push you out of it then they aren't your friends and the guys don't really care about it. Would you rather be called a whore than prude, no[[sorry to be so blunt]]. Stand strong with what you believe in and once you decide you are ready then and only then should you give in.
Hope I Helped.
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From the information you gave it sounds like he just asked the question, which i wouldn't jump to conclusions and feel like he's pressuring you. it's good to talk about things.
and its also good to be honest. unlike most young girls on this site, i really respect you for the way you think and feel. my true advice though is to not do anything. even if you just told yourself you'd go to 2nd. It's definitelyyyy common knowledge that girls who start doing sexual things earlier will almost ALWAYS end up having sex earlier. at 14 you should be a virgin and in my opinion, you shouldn't be sexually active at all. I don't care about the decisions other people around you are making, and neither should you.
It sounds like you're a smart girl and you seem like the type that might regret your decision later if you chose to be active. I believe that the people that get pressured for sex in high school, put themselves in those situations. I've steered clear of people and places where that might happen and you can too. It's not as hard as one might think to see through to a guys true intentions.
Good luck with everything and i hope you make smart choices!
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If this makes you a "prude" wear that label with pride and a cheshire cat grin. You're not a prude nor are you foolish enough to get into something like sex when you aren't ready. If your current boyfriend won't accept the fact you want to wait and aren't rushing in to something this critical than dump him.
That's not the right type of guy to be with. Guys like that want sex and nothing else. odds are your boyfriend is a good guy and one who will accept and appreciate where you stand. If he doesn't it says more about him than you think.
Don't be afraid to lose a boyfriend or any guy based on wanting to keep your virginity nor should you cave. You'll find a lot of guys who respect your choice and want to be with you. Anyone who doesn't respect your choices about sex doesn't deserve to be with you. Don't cave in for anybody.
If you don't want to have sex until married than hold to that belief and conviction. If you change your mind in the future that's okay too but give it a hell of a lot of thought and make sure it's with the right guy who will stay with you afterwards.
Guys will always pressure girls like you in high school and even in middle school with the way things are going these days. Just tell them you aren't interested in sex until married. Regardless of what anyone says a lot of your friends are still virgins even if they say they aren't same with classmates.
These days teens are signing vows etc. to wait. Nothing wrong or out of style or weird being a virgin especially at 14. You should be at that age.
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hi, i would just like to say don't do anything that will make you feel uncomfortable. staying abstinent is a great thing and you wouldn't want to do something you'll regret. not everyone is doing stuff like that really, it just seems that way. you should find someone who will respect your values, if they don't then they aren't worth being with. another thing, most people i've talked to who are young and have had sex regret it, so save it until someone special comes around!
i'm fifteen and in highschool and i haven't really experienced much pressure for sex. i've felt like everyone around me is having sex but it's not everyone.
good luck and don't give in to peer pressure!
-hannah
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There will ALWAYS be people who pressure you about things you don't want to do. ALWAYS.
That doesn't mean you should do them. In fact, pressure is usually a good sign you should NOT do it.
You can't worry what other people think so much AND stick to your values. One of those two things have to change.
You can change your values if you want too, but don't change them for your signifigant other's sake. Sex wont make anyone love you more, or stay with you. If it did I would have like 20 men and women who are madly in love with me. I don't, because sex doesn't work that way. Not for anybody.
If a guy can't stay with you and love you without sex, then he eventually wont stay with you and love you with sex. If he can't deal with your choices, he isn't the right guy for you, no matter how much you might love him.
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i think being abstinent until marriage is like the biggest challange to overcome, because to be honest, you will feel pressured or tempted to have sex in high school and college. and for the people to actually stick it out until their wedding night, i have the up most respect for.
dont ever feel obligated into doing something just because it seems like everyone else but you is doing it.
and just a heads up, your not going to be the only person who enters high school that is a virgin, and i gaurentee you wont be the only one to leave that way.
theres a lot of talking that may be going around between people, but that whole 'everyone does it' is seriously so far from the truth. i promise you.
remember to respect yourself and what you believe in. when your ready, you will know. dont listen to any one who trys to tell you different, because their opinions dont matter when it comes to you and your personal life.
(:
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