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PREGNANT TEENAGER
im 16 and im pregnant with my boyfriends baby.
i need a lot of help.
im NOT getting an abortion so thats out of the question, even if my boyfriend left me.
heres my backround information.
THIS WAS NOT A MISTAKE. I WANTED TO BE PREGNANT! my birthdays in early december, im a softmore, im currently living with my mother (hoping to move in with my dad) *parents are devorcing*, i have a dog that i will not leave without, i DONT have a car or licance YET, i come from an above middle class family, im a varsity cheerleader for my high school and i LOVE it, my moms sister had a child at 16 so my mom is always warning me not to, im a only child, and lastly, my parents are TOTALLY over protective.
here are the things i need advice on...
-how to i tell my mom
-how do i tell my dad
-am i too young for a house/apt. with my boyfriend (same age)
-how will i finish high school/ go on to collage
-should i start work/get a job
-what do i do about cheerleading. do i have to quit
-what should i do with the child while in school
-could i get home schooled for part of the pregnancy
-how can i hide the bigness
-how where do i plan everything
-how do i get parents support
-how do i get friends to understand
-how will friends throw baby shower
-how hide it from friends parents
-will parents but baby stuff or make me pay for it
-any other things that i need to know.
-if its a girl/boy
-baby names
although this not a "planned" preg. its not like it was like one day, OH IM PREGNANT. we decided this. and its a big responcibility but i feel we can handle it. please, i need as much help from anyone and everyone including boys, and girl, other teenage mothers, and older mothers. anyone who can help me. it would be greatly appriciated. thank you.
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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
You still need to grow up and experience many things in life, only make you a good parent later on.
Ever thought of having your child adopted. You can always get your baby back 18 years later. I found a cool site for parent the other day www.goodparentclub.com.
Cheers,
Skywalker.
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i have a dog that i will not leave without
Food/diapers/clothes for baby - food for dog.
Bye doggie. I'm sorry. I can't afford to have you anymore.
i DONT have a car or licance YET
Better work on that. Should have had this already before planning a pregnancy. See, not only do you have frequent trips to the OB, but baby will have frequent doctor appointments. That's if all is well and you don't have pregnancy complications and/or baby doesn't get sick.
i come from an above middle class family
Your PARENTS are above middle class. You aren't. You have nothing that is yours to speak of. Not even a car. Welcome to Poor Town.
im a varsity cheerleader for my high school and i LOVE it
Bye-bye cheerleading. Can't do that when pregnant, and most respecting schools won't allow a teen mom to represent their school as a cheerleader.
my moms sister had a child at 16 so my mom is always warning me not to
Ever stop to think that Mom knows what she's talking about?
my parents are TOTALLY over protective
Can't say as I blame them.
-how to i tell my mom
-how do i tell my dad
Blurt it out. There. Done. Like ripping off a band aid.
-am i too young for a house/apt. with my boyfriend (same age)
As everyone has already said, yes. You can't get into a rental agreement until you are of majority age.
-how will i finish high school/ go on to collage
I truly hope you can get that figured out for your child's sake more than your own. But good luck with that. You obviously have no clue what you've gotten yourself into. Try your best, that's all I can say.
-should i start work/get a job
its a big responcibility but i feel we can handle it
So... why are you asking this question if you can handle it? YES. You need an INCOME. Money does not grow on trees, and it isn't freely handed out. Children are expensive. They require money to care for them for many years.
-what should i do with the child while in school
Well, daycare is quite expensive, so hope like hell Mom and Dad will watch the baby.
-could i get home schooled for part of the pregnancy
If you are going to go that route, you might as well take it all the way and graduate from home. That solves the problem of what to do with baby while at school.
-how can i hide the bigness
Good luck with that one. I wouldn't even bother with all that.
-how where do i plan everything
Why didn't you have everything mapped out already if this was something you decided to try for?
-how do i get parents support
-how do i get friends to understand
Hope and pray for the best.
-how will friends throw baby shower
That is up to them to do, not you. I think you have bigger things on your plate to worry about rather than baby showers.
-how hide it from friends parents
Stop having friends?
Realize you can't hide a baby all your life. Parents aren't blind nor stupid.
-will parents but baby stuff or make me pay for it
its a big responcibility but i feel we can handle it
So since you can handle the big responsibility, you need to figure out how to pay for it yourself. That goes with the territory of planning to have babies.
-any other things that i need to know
Be prepared for your life to change. No more cheer, no more going out on the town, no more having money. No more lots of things.
Welcome to parenthood.
-if its a girl/boy
You can find out around 18 weeks by ultrasound. Be sure to attend all OB appointments. That's very important.
-baby names
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ygs-29/f/Mother pregnant with her second child.
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It’s interesting that you would want to get pregnant at 16, when you seem to have things going on for you, such as cheer leading, hopes of going to college, et.c.. You need to tell your parents immediately, sit them down together in the living room and announce it. You need to be calm because more than likely, they will overreact. If you and your boyfriend are still together, then have him be there with his parents. Every decision you make from there on should be with your parents. You should be able to continue going to school until you give birth, after which your life will be changed forever. While it is still possible for you to complete schooling, go to college or even get a job, with a baby in your life, these things will be very challenging, and you need to be mentally prepared for some hard work and sleepless nights. Please wait for about two years before you get an apartment, you need to save the money. Please do not make any attempts to hide the pregnancy; you might hurt your self and the baby. People are going to talk, get used to it, as well as the stares. It makes no sense for you to be shamed, so hold your head up high and be proud, it will be good for you and the baby. Also, I wouldn’t recommend you continue cheer leading, particularly if you traditionally engage in flips and somersaults.
Best of luck.
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Ok tell your mom and dad caustiously if they get mad its not like they can kill you with a baby in your stomach. Your not to young for a apartment but you will need to get emancipated which takes a lot of legal mumbo jumbo. To finish high school the state will most likley pay for daycare throughout those years. YOU HAVE TO QUIT CHEERLEADING ITS THE SAFEST ROUTE. daycare. yes home school or altenative your choice. BIG bIG SHIRTS. talk to everyone you need to doctors pediatricians YOUR PARENTS.Most likly your parents will support you if not the state will. Friends usually are more sensitive to the fact they are women they have to understand. Dont worry girls love to plan things it will work out. Dont hide it it will only make things complicated. your parents will cough up the cash. You may be scared but you have to tell your parents its the best way to have a safe pregnancy. Doctors will get an ultrasound and you will find out that way or you can wait till you hav the baby. Baby websites just type in "Baby Names" then you can search through everything. And if your wondering how i kno all this it's not becuz i got pregnant im only 14 but my sister got pregnant at 13 she's 16 now and she got through it fine she had a baby boy who she named marcel he's 2 1/2 now. Oh yeah stay away from smoke and caffeine especially it can cause birth deffects.
GOOD LUCK!
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well i wouldnt say anythin to the parents until you are sure after two weeks of missing your period then take another pregnancy test if you already done this then here is
1.how to tell your mom and dad you sit them down and do a juno haha just say it im pregnate. their reaction may not be like congrats but it has to be done!
2.i think you are to young you have to be at least 18
3.you may not finish high school or even go to collage for that matter it all depends
4. that again is what you talk with your parents with
5. you can not play a sport if your pregnate
6. the child you can leave with your mom or dad if they let you
7. thats should be talked over with your parents and how your school feels about this
8.sweatshirts big cloths old navy has good stuff
9.planing is with your folks or between your boyfriend and you
10. you ask for it you just say i need you guys in it
11. they may not but talking to them is all you can do and hope for the best.
12. it all depends if they are wikid good friends
13. you really shouldnt hide it you may damage the baby and can even kill it or it can be born into disabilities. please tell your parents so you can go to a doctor there are certain things that you cant eat or do. and hiding everything is a litle hard the morning sickness and the overeating and you getting bigger is a litle hard to not notice
14. they have to help you out becuase you arnt leagal yet
15. you have made a very hard choice if i were you i would get an open adoption thats where you give your baby to someone you picked out and still get to see the baby pictures birthdays and the baby knows that you are the birth mother so its not clueless for the rest of his or her life. but if you want it to keep for you then it will be hard you will make many sacrafices like not going to parties or school sometimes the cost is alot and changing dipares all the time the crying at night what if the baby gets sick do you know how to take care of it. sometimes you want to parent your own child but your mother or father might get in the way it becomes a family issue. and if your boyfriend doesnt stay for the baby then what do you do. but luckly the father today HAS to be on the certifacate and has to pay childs support until the child is 21 if you are keeping the baby. if it comes down to it and you know you cant handle it please do not get an abortion it seems you arnt but some people can chnage thier mind.
16.doctor tells you
17.i love the name skylar it works for both genders.
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-you are to young for an appartment--wait a year or two
-you wall definetely need to quit cheerleading-you will be way to busy with a baby
-the baby shower is the least thing you will need to be worrying about.
-get a baby name book and look for your favorite
-get a job for money
-be calm and tell your parents together
-hide the bigness with big shirts
-it wont matter if its a girl or boy you should love it no matter what
-get a babysitter(daycare) or your parents for during the day with the kid
-it will be really hard finishing school just try as hard as you can
Hope i helped :]
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THANK YOU, for NOT having an abortion :)
1. You need to tell your parents calmly. They might yell, they might scream, but they can't change what happened.
2. Yes, you are too young for an apt. I believe you need to be 18
3. You can finish high school by asking your parents to help you raise the baby. If they refuse to help you or kick you out, you might have a problem with this one. You might have to get a job and find a place to live.
4. Bye-bye cheerleading.
5. Oddly enough, babies aren't allowed in school. Leave it home with your parents or your boyfriends parents.
6. You can't hide the "bigness"
7. You need to get support from your mother to help you plan everything. You can't take on such a big responsibility even though you think you can.
8. You should know that you really aren't ready for a baby. You should have answered all of these questions before you and your boyfriend decided to get pregnant. However, whats done is done. You can't change the fact that you will now be responsible to raise a child and send it off into the world. Seeing as you have "over protective parents" I am sure they will want to be with you every step of the way and offer support by taking care if it while you are in school and buying it things it needs.
as for names: www.babynames.com
xxtiffany
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Simply tell your parents, calmly, and expect them to be not so calm. Tell them you want to keep the child. Let them respond and get used to the idea. Be prepared for their completely just and deserved anger.
You are too young for an apartment. Unless you parents intend on providing it for you.
You will hopefully finish high school with HUGE amount of help from your parents, teachers, and perhaps social services as well.
In every case of teenage pregnancy I am acquainted with, the mother has not completed, or in some cases even begun college until her child is school-aged. Unless someone else (perhaps your parents, or his) raise the child, I would strongly suggest you place college in the 10 year plan, not the 3 year plan. There are ways to make it work, ways that you can look into later, in a few years, after the most serious issues have been addressed.
You should start to work. If for no other reason then to show your parents you aren't as completely irresponsible as you are going to seem to them.
You will need to quit cheerleading when the doctor tells you too. It is the first of many things you are going to have to give up.
Home schooling? Talk to your parents, they have to agree, and possible pay, for such an arrangement.
If you are seriously worried about how you look 'big' THAT should tell you that you aren't ready to be pregnant for crying out loud.
How to get parents support and friends to understand: First off, you need to understand, and it sounds like you don't, that you ARE NOT ready do this and that you desperately require their support or you and your child wouldn't be able to survive. Then you beg for their support. If that doesn't work: pray.
You can't both hide it from people who would disapprove and throw a party over it. You can't have it all darling. Either you go public, or you don't. If you are afraid of people finding out, a baby shower is bad idea.
I HOPE they make you pay for it all, but they won't, because you couldn't possibly pay for even most of it! So they will pay, because if they don't you and your child starve and live in filth. Start begging and praying and practice saying "Thank you."
What you NEED to know, is that your decision was selfish, unrealistic and puts huge demands on your parents.
The majority of questions you asked you should have figured out BEFORE 'deciding' to have a baby.
'Responsible' would be knowing where you would live, how you would fund it, and how you would arrange your other responsibilities (ie. School) prior to making the choice.
What you did was not responsible in any way.
You weren't prepared. You aren't prepared. Go to your parents and beg for their help, because you aren't going to make it through without them. Only once you have ADULT support, can you start to discover the answers to these questions. Each person and case is different, start to deal with yours.
Good luck. You need it.
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