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My new best friend is a paraplegic. We have
become really close but he never talks about
it.
I do know he had some kind of diving accident
but that is all. We get along great and talk
about everything but this one thing.
Would it be really rude of me to just ask about
it? I'm asking because he is my friend and I
want to know all about him just like he knows
about me.
I don't want it to seem like I am being nosy
or anything because I really am not. Its just
I'm always wondering things about it and it is
distracting that I do.
How would you approach the subject?
Thank you for your time.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Ok, so the guy is your best friend. Why should you feel as if you are being rude or nosey by being open and honest about everything when that is a big part of what makes a friendship?
If you are wondering things, or are just curious, say something. Ask him about it.
How do you approach it? Basically like you did here- Tell him you share so many things with one another, yet you don't talk about how he became paralyzed, and you are curious to know about what happened.
You will likely find the bond of your friendship strengthen as you discover what happened, the struggles he has faced, and the struggles he still faces, and as he discovers that you are a good enough friend to care about his struggles, and to try to understand what he has, and is, going through.
I'm sure he has been asked about it by perfect strangers, so you should have no worries about offending him by asking him as his best friend.
If he tells you he'd rather not talk about it, then just say "Ok, but I'm open to listen if you ever want to talk" and leave it at that until he is ready to discuss it.
ygs-29/f
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Well, my brother has been paraplegic since birth. Normally, people have no problem asking him what his story is, and he has no problem explaining it to them. Every now and then, those who are cuious enough, but too shy to approach him, ask me, and I can fill them in. I say, that if you're good friends with him, then go for it. I believe someone already mentioned not to push him into telling you if he doesn't want to, that's a good thing to remember. No matter how long ago it occured, it could still cause him emotional pain. Just go by asking him in a calm way, as if you were asking him any other question. He's really no different than anyone else you talk to :].
Hope I helped a little bit,
Devon
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i think that it would be okay if you asked him, but if he doesnt answer dont push the subject. i went throught the same situation with my friend. he told me he had huntingtons disease, but didnt say much more about it. i really wanted to know so i asked him and he opened up. your friend might be the same way. in fact, he may even want to talk to you about it, and just doesnt know how to bring it up. so as long as you bring up the subject in a sensitive way it should be alright. good luck!
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if he is your best friend, then im sure he wouldnt mind talking about it. some people feel its better for the to tell someone. its not being nosy or anything because you want to know because you care about him. i'd just be like hey what happened to you? and explain to him that you want to know but you dont want to come off as being nosy or anything.
hope this helps and good luckk!
xokaitox
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be like
i know its none of my buiness but do you mind telling me what happend
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Just come out and ask them. Don't beat around the bush with it. I'm sure they know you are curious.
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