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abusive relationship
I've been with my boyfriend since October 23rd 2005, i'm 15 almost 16 and he turned 18 in March. [ if that helps ]. He started living with me about 6 months after we met. We fight sometimes , but when we do fight he sometimes gets abusive. We got in a fight like a week ago and he grabbed me by the back of my neck forcing my head down in the my bed. My first thought after he did it was " well i don't feel the pain now , but i know in a couple days my neck will hurt ". and so it did.... i really love him alot and i wish he would change. is there anything i can change about myself for him to stop this , because i know in the future if this keeps happening , we won't be together.
thank you so much.
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HEY
there is nothing that you should change about you, unless you're physical too. but i think that it might go too far one day and you might want to slowly let go now before something bad happens...i know you really love him alot but you have to think of yourself first and your personal safety...I hope i helped and that everything works out, Jesus be with you on this
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YOU DONT NEED TO CHANGE! HE NEEDS TO CHANGE! The reason you won't be together in the future is because he's gonna end up in jail for killing you if you don't stop this now. You need to put him in a serious reality check and stand up for yourself. You might love him, but you sure as hell won't love him when he hurts you harder. Let him know that if he ever lays a hand on you again that isn't a gentle touch, you will retaliate and you will end up leaving.
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there is nothing at all you should change about yourself. im sure this is hard to hear but you need to get rid of that guy. you may love him but that is unhealthy.. any guy that would hit a girl is sick. he might have some issues but he should never hit you. im sorry to tell you hes most likely not going to change. think of it this way... if you had a daughter would u want her in a realationship with a boy who abuses her? i know it will be hard but u should end that and find a good guy. there are many out there.. and dont worry your still young. your going to meet alot of very good guys.. so dont settle for someone who does that 2 you.. no one deserves that.
good luck! i hope you make the right choice
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the hell?You didnt even do anything,theres nothing you gotta change.Unless you hit him too.You need to talk to him and tell him that he gotta show you some respect because if he doesnt change this then he isnt being dedicated to you by changing a small thing like this to make you happy.If he doesnt stop then threaten him to break up and hell freak!
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It's not your fault and you don't need to change yourself to meet the demands of an abusive piece of shit.Break the relationship off if you're smart.If you just sit around and take it,he's going to see that you're weak and the abuse is just going to get worse and worse.When people are killed in relationships,do you think that it happens out of nowhere?No,it starts like this and gradually gets worse and worse until you're left with no way out.
If you don't want to listen that's your deal.You're putting your happiness and well being in the hands of another person,so don't blame anyone besides yourself when it blows up in your face.
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This definitely isn't going to be the answer you'll want to hear, but if you just try to change and meet his demands, he'll get worse. No girl, or guy deserves to be in this kind of relationship. And you're only fifteen going on sixteen? That's totally unnessesary.
Don't change yourself. If you do, make it for the better. Make yourself bolder. If this guys even tries to touch you again, kick him. Fast and hard.
He may be your boyfriend, but this is assault and that's kind of against the law.
If you want to stay with him, and think his actions have been for some odd, abnormal reason, talk to him. If it helps, have a family member or friend who knows him well with you, too. Maybe even one of his family members who might know what he's been doing. Talk everything over, and maybe he'll realize what he's doing is wrong.
If nothing changes, though, you need to report him to the police, or leave him or something, because in the worse, but possibly most common scenerio, he'll get worse, and you'll end up getting really hurt, and NO BODY needs that.
If not for you, do it for the other people who love you.
Try to talk to him, and then see what happens.
Best of luck, and even if this may not be the answer you were looking for, it may be the answer you need to hear. I hope I've helped in some way.
XOXO
KAT.
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