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parent/adult child question
34/f
I have a silly problem. It's my mother and her insipid e-mails. She forwards me all of this junk. I don't really care about the cute, cuddly pictures of kitties and bunnies. It's the political stuff that annoys me. We do not have the same political views and she is WELL aware of this. She sends me e-mails (the ones that say if you agree that communists are inviting Castro to take over the Supreme Court, forward this to 500 people immediately and if you don't, you
don't love Jesus and you need to move to France with the whole A.C.L.U.) touting political, social, and religious views I vehemently disagree with and which provoke argumentative feelings in me. I'd really love to reply to them and tell her
why it's just [baloney]. I have tried using it as a start to a serious, but civil discussion. She gets offended. I have repeatedly asked her to stop sending me this stuff. Her reply is that I can just delete them and that I should just do the "Christian" thing and ignore them. Well, it's about a weekly occurrence that I get something from her that sets me on fire, even though I have
told her point-blank that it offends me.
It's to the point where I feel like replying to each with a baudy snippet from a gay sex columnist or an article from The Onion or even a page from NARAL (abortion rights) just so she can see what it's like to be irritated by this stuff. I feel like she doesn't care or doesn't respect who I am when she does this. Another thing I've thought of is just simply blocking her e-mails. Maybe I should just chill out because she's the only mother I'll ever have and I do love her. It's just hard because I've never felt like I belonged in my family (I like to joke that I'm a white sheep in a flock of black ones) and these e-mails seem to emphasize the point.
Any advice? Thanks.
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Use your delete button before you even open the email. She thinks its delivered, you remain unflustered.
This is just your mom's way of transitioning her relationship with you from authority figure to adult friend. The issue is hers, don't make it yours.
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Hi,
Find an email program that will allow you to "Bounce" her emails. It's not a reply, it acts as if the email was undeliverable, and the person who sent the email is informed that the email couldn't be delivered.
Personally, I quite like the idea of sending gay sex columnist's articles in return. It really depends on how much you want to stay friendly with your mother. It sounds to me like most of what she does probably annoys you.
-K
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Since when is the "Christian" thing defined as ignoring someone? I wish all the Christians who come to my door selling their religion would ignore me, but I usually have to start foaming at the mouth and speaking in tongues before they'll go away.
I think it's time to block her account. Preferably, do it in such a way that sends a message back to her:
_____________________
Your recent message to this recipient has been flagged as junk and deleted. Please check for possible objectionable content before re-sending.
_____________________
If that doesn't work, then feel free to put her on the mailing lists of the Christian Science Monitor, the Watchtower, the GOP, and all the other right-wing propaganda sources you can possibly find. Then SHE can get buried in it for a while, and if she wonders how it happened, just tell her that with all the E-mails she was spreading around, is it really all that surprising that she would end up on all these lists?
Oh, and call her on the phone frequently to tell her how much you love her.
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I'd start with sending opposing opinions, but don't do it just to annoy her, do it to get her to understand your views(even if she disagrees). If she reacts really bad about that then just block her. If she has something important to say she'll say it to you in person.
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hey, well you`ve tried speaking with her about it and she didn`t listen. the only thing that you can do is just simply ignore them. if you don`t agree with the emails then that`s fine. just because you read an email doesn`t mean that you have to agree with what it`s stating. be the bigger person and just stay calm.
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