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Eh, idk what to name it.
13/f.
Ok; My boyfriend and I have been dating for a while now, and he used to be really nice and sweet. But, now all he talks about is sex. He usually says, "Just kidding, I love you." After all his perverted comments, but I can't tell when he is kidding or not. I really like him, possibly even love. I am just wondering, how can I tell when he is kidding or not?
Also, I have had thoughts about having sex with him alot lately. I feel so bad, but whenever I see or talk to him, I get these visions in my head of us making love. Is this bad? I've always said to myself, I am going to stay a virgin until I get married but he makes me feel as if I want to give that up.
P.s. I'd like a guys view, but girls are more than welcome to answer as well.
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yeah well that is perfectly normal because your at the age where you are going to be going puberty and it is common to get those thoughts but think carefully before you pysically do them.
♥amy
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i never said he was just hitting puberty i said you were 15 isnt that much diffrent from 13 he still needs to mature alittle
its normal..you just hit puberty its ok if you love him but if he loved you he would respect you and not be constantly talking about sex sounds like hes a potential user. just dont let him pull you in its one thing think about something its another thing to act on it.dont do anything your not 100 percent sure of your still young and if you do be prepared for consequences such as pregnacy,him using you,him leaving you,him spreading the word about you,you being disatisfied or disapointed.he needs to grow into his hormones.and it sounds like hes using im kidding as kind of a coverup. if he used to be nice then that should tip you off that hes a little on the fake side and might be trying to get one thing just because someone says i love you doesnt mean he means it especially that young.just be careful because people can decieve you and dont think im coming from a religious point of view because im not religious. if you do which im not recommending it but if you do decide to do it and it turns out bad you can stop at anythime you are the creator of your own universe and nobody is your boss.
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Here's what he's doing: he's dropping hints, lines, and comments and watching for your response. As soon as he sees something that indicates you're not opposed to the idea, that's when he won't say he's "just kidding." In reality, he's probably not kidding about any of what he's saying; if you said Yes to any of his remarks, he'd be all for it.
This is pretty childish behavior on his part and indicates that despite what he may think, he is NOT ready for sex. Furthermore, YOU are not ready for it - and I think you realize that, indicating that you are a good deal more mature than he is.
As far as what you're seeing in your head, it is perfectly natural and even encouraging. You're SUPPOSED to want to have sex; it's how we're wired. If we didn't have that instinct, we would probably have died out after the first generation. So don't worry about your thoughts, feelings, urges, temptations... they're signs that you're healthy and normal. Please, try not to feel bad about it.
There are three good reasons not to give in to that temptation right now, though:
(1) You're only 13. That's too young, in a legal, emotional, and societal sense. It's also far too young to deal with the consequences if your birth control should fail.
(2) Your boyfriend is even younger than you are, emotionally. He would NOT be an appropriate choice right now for a sex partner. Actually, you might reconsider whether he's a good choice for a boyfriend.
(3) You did make a promise to yourself, and it's worth at least TRYING to keep it.
I strongly suggest that you talk to your boyfriend and tell him that his sexual comments aren't funny, aren't welcome, and that if that's what he wants he needs to look for it elsewhere. He'll probably protest and say that it's harmless fun, that he's just kidding around, that you shouldn't take it so seriously. Just tell him that in that case, it shouldn't be a problem for him to stop doing it. Bottom line is, he needs to grow up.
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There is no right age to be having sex. But a girl your age, shouldn't be. You're really young, and who knows what'll happen after. You might regret it, you might not.
Don't have sex until you're absolutely ready to. If you know the consequences, and you're not scared or uncomfortable, then go for it. But if you're doubting it, or second guessing yourself, or just having second thoughts in general, you shouldn't be having sex.
Wait until you're older, or until you absolutely know you're ready. You might be ready in a few weeks, months, or even years. You might be ready when you get married. Who knows? Everyone's different.
It's not wrong of you to have thoughts about having sex with your boyfriend. Ask him if he's really kidding. But if you guys have been dating for a while, you should know when he's kidding & when he's serious.
And if your boyfriend is the same age as you, chances are; he's just trying to get into your pants. Boys that age usually say anything to try to sleep with a girl. They know if they sweet talk you, you'll fall for it & you'll give it up. Hopefully, your boyfriend really does wanna have sex with you, and really does love you & care about you, and isn't just trying to get inside your pants. =) But boys his age have raging hormones.
But the most important thing, talk to him about it. And think seriously about this. It's a serious matter & shouldn't be taken lightly.
♥T!NA
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hey..at that age all that is on guys minds are sex and he may just say he is kidding but that is what he actually wants more then likely..and yes it is perfectly normal to want to have sex at your age its hormones...but i think it is very important you wait on the decision of having sex...waiting till marriage is an excellent idea
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hey, well there is no right age to have sex. its whenever you are ready mentally. if you truly believe that you are ready mentally then make sure that you really love him and that he really loves you and not just for sex.
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