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Blow Job
Riiight...
I'm 14. My girlfriend is 16. We both love each other very much.
Recently, after a night of passion (basically lots of making out and holding one another), she offered to take me to third base. I am simply not sure I'm ready for this, for a couple reasons...
The major one is it's simply incredibly daunting. I've never made it that far with any girl, and this is the kind of thing I've heard about in health class. I feel a little young and unprepared... I just get rather nervous when I consider it.
The other is simply the original idea I had when I first heard of it. I remember back years ago, when I first heard of the whole idea, I remember thinking "Wow, that sounds really disgusting for her. I would never make ANY girl do that for me". She says it doesn't bother me, but I don't know...
What you have to understand is that it's not her, it's me. I love and trust her indefinitely, it's issues I just have with myself. I think I also feel a little insecure about my body... I'm also afraid, however, that if I continuously pass something like this up, I'll just never be ready no matter how old I get.
Please don't answer this from a religious standpoint, and don't just say "talk to her" because I'm already doing that. She'd like an answer by Saturday.
Does anyone have any advice?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
It prolly won't help to tell you what you should or shouldn't do in this situation. But keep two things in mind: There are possible health risks involved in the activity you refer to, so you should fully understand the risk of STDs; and you have your whole life ahead of you so there will be hundreds or even thousands of opportunities for this kind of sexual behavior in the future. You don't have to do it right now if you are not ready for it.
I was a junior in college before I had a sexual experience with a partner, and I don't feel that I missed anything at all. By that time, I knew what I wanted; I knew the risks and possible consequences; and I decided I was ready for sex. I like being in control of my life. This means deciding on what I want, knowing how to get what I want, and then having the guts to get it. It also means keeping the other person's wants and needs in mind. I might not have been mature enough to be able to do these things until I was well into college. Once I decided to start dating and seeking a sexual relationship, I found plenty of opportunities. The opportunities for sex don't seem to decrease as you grow up; they only increase. So, there's no need to sweat it for now; don't give in to pressure. Make sure you know what you want before you do it.
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Sorry Kinda got carried away :)
Your welcome
God bless
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Okay, well i was ganna say talk to her about it and stuff but you already have. So if you dont want to do it, the DONT. you cant be pressured into something that you dont want to do. Tell her you need to take your time and when you really want to do stuff with her, then do it. its really up to you, but i suggest you do what you feel it right...
hope i helpeddd***
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if your not ready your not ready. bottom line and its not true that if you keep passing it up then youll never be ready. go with your own flow.
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If you don't feel like you are ready for that then you just have to tell her,I am sure she will understand if you want to wait a wile longer.If she doesn't understand how you feel then well......i don't think she would a vary good gf if she did that.You know her alot better then i do (lol i don't know her or you =])so you would probebly know weather or not she would mind if you waited so just take a minit to think about that.
-Good luck hun :)
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Well, I definitely see where you're coming from.
Insecurity can take over big time. But if you love her and trust her, just be yourself around her. Think of something comforting. Just don't give the blowjob thing too much thought. If it happens, great. And if it doesn't, then it isn't the right time.
The more you think about it, the more stressful the decision can be. I'm sure she'll enjoy it, and you will enjoy it as well. Just start kissing and see where it leads you. Don't overthink.
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I wonder why she wants to do it for you so badly if you're not even sure about it yourself. I mean, it's usually for the guy anyway. But, i do think you should bring up your insecurities with her, being open is key.
I always say this but if it feels right, then do it safely. Plus, this girl sounds like she kind of knows what she's doing so theres not much you have to worry about with that one.
by the way, pressuring you even a little bit isn't going to make things any easier on you, maybe she could consider that
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