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Hopeless Situation
Ok, here is my problem. I have a group of friends. We all were pretty cool with eachother until this year. One girl was acting annoying etc. etc. and making some huge mistakes. My other friends got made at her and talk about her everytime I come over because they are dissappointed and mad at her because she made mistakes, especially a huge one. I agree with them on some topics, but not on others. The friend who makes mistakes is still my friend...but sometimes she goes and makes a white lie to me every now and then and it makes me uncomfortable. I can not side with her or else I'll lose some of my good friends, but I cant side with them either because I do not agree with everything they are doing. I am being used and pestered by the annoying friend sometimes. I try to talk to her about it....but I never can say the things I want to say right. I need help! What should I do?
--Stuck in the Middle
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I know this may be harsh, but it somewhat reminds me of something I did. So, I'll just tell you... You need to tell your gut that you just have to say to your annoying friend, "I don't like it when you lie to me! It makes me feel (say whatever it makes you feel, even if it is uncomfortable)! I also feel like I can't trust you anymore!" Also say that if this continues, there will be no more friendship between you two. Friends should always feel comfortable and happy when they meet. I guess you should feel like you're looking forward to seeing her. If you don't feel this way, she is not the best friend you will have. I may sound like a grown-up, but I'm only 13.
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When you and your friends talk about her behind her back about her mistakes..that's not doing anything to fix them. If you guys are really friends with her then yall should tell her that she is making mistakes. Help her through hard times instead of gossip. That's what you should say to the friends that you don't agree with. Don't side, be nuteral and talk to both parties about how you feel about the issue.
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First of all if this girl who makes mistakes is your friend and your other friends talk about her,you should definatly tell your friends to stop talking about the girl who makes mistakes.Second of all,you need to tell your friends that you don't agree with some of the things that they are saying about the girl who makes mistakes.Then,you need to tell the girl who makes mistakes that you are not comfortable with her "white lies",and you need to tell her you don't like being used and pestered.If you want all this madness to stop,you need to say what you feel.
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i think, you should tell your friends when you dont agree with them. you could say like 'i agree with you about blah blah, but i think you're being a little unreasonable on blah blah'. something like that. you dont have to agree with everything they say. you can have your opinions about certain situations.
With your other friend, you should just be honest and straightforward with her. She might not want to hear it, but that's what friends are for right? being able to tell each other the truth in situations. i hope i helped at least somewhat and things work out for you.
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