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Friend having sex.
Okay my friend is 14, soon to be 10th grader and her boyfriend is a senior. So she's having sex. Her parents don't know.. but she has NO problem flaunting it around everywhere.
She's doing it because she thinks she's in love and she doesn't want to be alone. Being alone is her biggest fear so she latches onto any good guy, you know? I've known her for 5 years and I've seen it over and over.
And a couple of people think her boyfriend is only in on the sex.
They have only been going out for about 6 months.
Should I try to talk to her? Or talk to her parents?
Because she keeps hurting herself.
And I've seen her cry in her sleep and it bothers me..
She's going way too far and I don't want her to get hurt.
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You are a good friend for worrying about her and being there for her, but honestly, her sex life isn't a part of you and you shoulnd't tell her parents. If she is in trouble, then talk to them but other than that, don't talk to them. Talk to her. Tell her what you just told us. Make her understand that you are just worried about her and that she doesn't have to sleep with a guy just so she's not lonely. I'm sure she knows you just want to help but I can also see if she gets bothered. I know you don't mean to but if she doesn't think she's making a mistake, that's on her. Don't try to prevent it and maybe she will learn from it. It's hard to see your best friends hurt but just be there for her no matter what kind of decisions she makes.
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Don't talk to her parents about it. Talk to her. You should say something like "I'm scared for you. You shouldn't be hurting yourself. You should find someone that loves you for you and not just because you'll have sex with them." Hope this helps! : )
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Hi, yes deffinately be there for her. This is quite common for some girls. Some girls want guys that badly and they will go to all the extremes just to keep them. The guy's pick that up and start taking advantage of them. They can be worried sick and frightened of losing the guy which means it can cause alot of sadness and anxiety. The problem with love is it can be awarding but then again it can really hurt us, emotionally. She is quite young to be having sex and really all you can do is try and talk to her and be there for her when she needs you the most. It is quite likely in her situation that she's going to keep on getting hurt very bad and I would give her plenty of hug's and really show her that there is someone out there who likes her. If this guy is after sex, then shame on him. Try and give your friend all the advice you can give her. She might ignore you but will lately find out what you've told her for herself. All you can do is give her advice but the choices and what she does is up to her. Love does hurt, but being lonelly can hurt even more. Daniel.
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Let your bestfriend know that she doesn't have to have sex with a guy because she fears losing him. If that guy is a good person then he'll love her and won't care if they have sex or not. He should respect her opinion, whether she wants to have sex or not. If he's all about lust then there is no love in the relationship. If she fears losing him, she should talk to him about how she feels, instead of having sex, just so that she thinks this will make him stay with her.
-mystical_breeze
Ox
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I know your trying to look out for her but if you talk to her parents you will LOSE HER FOREVE (trust me) try talking to her and tell her stop moving so fast her life hasnt started yet. and if things start to get deeper than you go to the parents
Jazzy**
Than in that case do what you got to do. in the end you will be a better than she could have been.
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mikela:
well.i know what your going through. you can tell your friend what shes doing isnt right or good for her and tell her what can happen. she obvisouly likes this guy but tell her theyre are other ways of showing she likes him. ask her to even ABSTAIN from sex. if hes still with her even tho shes not having sex. he obvisouly likes her.
am i right. but if it gets too out of hand tell her parent. tell YOUR parent after that thers not much you can do except be their for her
anaA thinks: well, i actually have a VERY similar situation going on with one of my friends. if you havent tried talking to her yet, give it a try but if that doesnt do anything go to her parents. she might be mad at you for a while but when its all over she will thank you. let her know that its not somthing to be proud of and that she is going to be known as the school whore/slut if she keeps going around like that, one day she is gonna end up messing around with the wrong guy and she is going to get hurt even more, tell her parents or a cousnler, its tough love tell her you wouldnt do all this if you didnt care.
hope this helps, good luck=]
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Yess, tell somebody. Probably not her, because she doesn't realize what she is doing..obviously. If your parents & her parents are friends, tell your Mom and get her to talk to her Mom.
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you should definetly talk about it to her first. she needs to know your feelings about what shes doing. tell her that this guy is not helping her, even though it might seem like it. also, tell her that shes never alone because you are there for her or something like that. if this doesnt work, then you should resort to telling her parents.
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