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please read it and give some good advice. ill rate high
okay i really need help..sorry this is long..
16/f
me and my best friend *natalie*..well we have been best friends since 1st grade. we were like inseperable..i love her to death. but ever since spring break, she has changed so much. she started skipping school nonstop. she failed the 10th grade. she started drinking alot but then she stopped. she had sex with a 21 year old that we all knew. she yells at me for the stupidest reasons. she freaks out on her parents and calls her mom a bitch and a whore. she doesnt respect my parents. she didnt even come to school to do her finals on the last day. and now its summer. and we usually have SO much fun. but she met some new guys that she hangs out with everyday and she gets drunk with them and gets high with them everyday. i guess she thinks its cool but i really do miss her. and ive tryed telling her that she is too wild and everything but she doesnt listen. all of our friends dislike her now. and i mean ALL of them. she likes this guy named ray but i dont think he likes her cause she is too loud. he doesnt really act like he likes her. i dont know what to do. no ones parents will let their kids hang out with her. i feel bad and i want to.. its just i dont want to get caught up with her and end up getting in DEEP trouble because of her. i really want her as a friend though. i want things how they used to be. what can i do?!?!?
ILL RATE HIGH!..
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
heyy
well first things first... the reason she started behaving this way. You're friend probably has problems at home that no one knows about. This stress could have "triggered" her. Maybe drinking and doing drugs is her way to relieve the pain. Either way, its not healthy (as im sure you already know) Do her parents know about your friends behavior? They should and if they dont- maybe you can confront them and say that your friend needs serious help. You could be saving your friends life. It is a very serious matter. Regardless of what your friend wants- do whats right and you would be a great friend (which im sure you are) Don't get involved with her new behavior and hang out with some of your other friends for a while. I'm sure you'll have a great summer and i wish you the best!
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I think if shes gotten into this much trouble already its not a good influence for you and thats why peoples parents wont let them hang out with her. Sometimes you have to let friends go, because they change - so far that you cant make them be themselves again and its too far away from where you can help them.
It sounds this girl needs serious adult help, or rehab type thing. Her lifestyle is not healthy and can lead into some very bad serious things.
The best thing as a friend for her you can do is get her help. Tell a parent or grownup or someoen you can trust who can help.
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Well it would seem that the best thing to do would be to get your friend to change back to the way she was. Is that happening anytime soon? Sorry, probably not. So what do you do? Realize that by being her you increase your chances of getting in trouble...plus it doesn't seem like she's a good influence on you. Try talking to her again and explain to her how you and everyone feels. If she doesn't want to listen, then thats her fault. You might want to be her friend, but she might not want to be your friend, and if thats the case then theres not much a friendship there at the moment. I wouldn't suggest hanging around her with a bunch of other people either; it might be a bit better if it was people you knew who weren't like the way she is or just the two of you. If things don't shape up anytime soon, then let go of her. She is her own self and will continue to be. What do you do? Be there if she wants to talk or needs help. But unless she asks you, don't try to interfere and change her, because she could end up hating you or try to harm you, or you could just get hurt by doing so. I'm sorry but from what you've said it doesn't seem like she's willing to change for the better anytime soon. She could be going through tough times, but if she has you to fall back on when she realizes what she is doing, then that could spark the re-beginning of your friendship. But for now, talk to her, see if you can do something with her that doesn't involve too many people, but don't expect too much; just know that people change, and losing that friendship might be temporary but not be as hard as having something bad happen to the two of you or something. Hope that helped and good luck.
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Your friend is probably going through a rough time in her life. You probably don't know what it is, and maybe even she doesn't either. Ask her what is going on and if she doesn't want to talk, then tell somebody else what is going on, like a parent or an adult that is an expert on this. Your friend needs help. It isn't your job to help her, even though it might feel like it. Let her know that you'll be there for her when she needs it, but that you aren't going to stick around to watch her hurt herself.
Good Luck :]
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Most people might say forget about your friend and find new ones. But I think this is a time when your friend needs you the most. Basically you have to be able to have a one-on-one with her. Tell her all the things you just told hundereds of people online ; that you think her lifestyle that she's living is dangerous and you miss how it use to be. Even though, people do change. It's very possible that she'll reject you and keep doing what she wants. But you still can't totally block her out of your life. I don't recommend you going with her to these parties, or changing your lifestyle or anythingl ike that. But I do think that you should keep on with your life, but still have an open ear/arm for her when she comes back. Because you are the one she may come back to.
&hearts
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I would get your friend some help a conselour or mayb you could talk to her.
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