I have a twin sister, and I am always helping her with school. I like helping her because she tries really hard. But I get very impatient when I am waiting for her to answer a certain question for a long time and I yell at her. I feel bad and I always tell myself I wont do it again but I do. What can I do ??
p.s. sometimes she gets an attitude when I explain something wrong and that gets me angry too because she acts like she is always right and I dont know how to handle this
-thanx
It's not like she's taking a while to answer because it gets on your nerves. She's thinking and trying really hard to understand. It's like being in class and when the teacher asks you a question and you are trying to think about it, they don't start yelling at you. They wait until you take a guess or admit that you are clueless.
When your sister starts to get upset that you explained it wrong, tell her it was your mistake and that you'll try explaining better. If she still gets agravated about it, just suggest that you both cool off and wait a little later to finish.
While she's trying to figure out the answer to a certain question, just think about how you are going to explain it better if it turns out that she doesn't know, but don't get mad because she can't understand it.
isis answered Wednesday May 24 2006, 1:17 pm: I have twins and I know it's very difficult for one twin to help the other, especially if one has to point out the other has made a mistake. You're too close in age to get away with this and could come across as trying to be superior. You need to try to think of how you would feel if the tables were turned, and treat her as you would want to be treated. If you get angry it will make her worse and in turn you will become more frustrated. Also, her acting as though she is always right can be defence mechanism as she doesn't like to admit she could be wrong, as this could show weakness.
If you like to help her, bear all this in mind, and if she is really struggling for an answer, try to put the question another way.
You need to talk to each other and say how the other's reactions affect each one and find ways to get around this.
Best of luck. [ isis's advice column | Ask isis A Question ]
Sherrys_sister answered Tuesday May 23 2006, 11:13 pm: Oh my god! Sherry does get mad. we always get in fights about it. When my sister yells at me I feel like I dont know anything and I just want to give up. just think about how she feels. shes confused and it already sucks that she does not get whatever shes learning. she doesnt need people to be yelling at her. [ Sherrys_sister's advice column | Ask Sherrys_sister A Question ]
Sherry answered Tuesday May 23 2006, 10:37 pm: I get impatient too when trying to help my little sister. When your getting impatient and want to yell or anything, stop and think...She doesn't understand the concept yet. You just need to breathe and relax...yelling is not going to help her but it will probably frustrate her and then she wont want to learn anything.
It just takes practice, after a while you'll be so patient..you wont even have to stop yourself from yelling.
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