|
my mom caught me.
13/f
Me and my mom have always had this sort of best-friend sort of relationship instead of a mother-daughter relationship. I didn't tell her everything, but I did tell her enough and wasn't embrassed infront of my friends with her. Infact, I kind of like to "show her off." She's really funny and basically acts like someone my age would act - only 43 and graying hair. But right now everything sort of changed.
A few weeks ago my mom went out on a date (My dad and her are divorced) and she said she would be out a few hours. Dinner, a movie, the basics. So figured it would be a perfect time to.. well, masturbate, I suppose. Only apparantly the date didn't last as long as she expected, and I didn't hear her open the door. And she kind of heard me, since I tend to get kind of loud. I have no idea what she was thinking, I just know that she opened the door to my room and saw me. Then shut the door and didn't talk to me for the rest of the night. After I got dressed I went and found her in the kitchen, and told her that that had been a little awkward, but she didn't say anything or do anything. She just kind of ignored me. And every since then it's been kind of weird, especially since my mom is one of those pre-martial-sex-and-I'm-sending-you-to-a-convent type of people. She's only had sex once, and that was when she "planned" to have me.
Now, instead of feeling all laid back when I'm around her, I keep getting this feeling like she's giving me a dirty look, like she thinks I'm some kind of skank. And actually, I know that she thinks that, because me, being the curious one, listened in on her phone call with her best friend, who my mom told that I was turning into some kind of slut ever since I started going out with my boyfriend, which really isn't true, since I was doing this long before I started going out with him.
I just don't really know how to make things cool between us again. Or how to break the ice so I don't feel like I'm being watched ever second of every day because my mom believes that I'm doing "dirty things."
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
i think you mom is being unfair. masturbation is not sexual intercourse with someone else, and she has no right to call you a skank. she has probably done it to, unless she thinks masturbating is a sin. unless you are only like 11 years old, she has no reason to worry. you cant get preg. from doin it by yourself
Hope i helped!
---Simone411---
]
Hey, My name is Haven.
Ok first of all, her freind does not need to make those kind of comments. Look, your mom needs to let it go because, your a teenager. Stuff like this happens. You can't tell me that your mom never has done it before. This is ridiculous and she needs to really get over it. I'm sorry that you got caught but thats crazy that she wont even talk to you because like why would u give up a great relationshitp over some masturbating? I mean, jus tell her that she needs to not be so upset because your a teenager. This is weird. And im sorry for you.
hope things get better.
..::havco::..
]
Well. You seem to have reached a quandary. This is the point in your life that your mom has to realize that you are growing up, not only physically and mentally, but emotionally and sexually. In my experience with my overly-strict, Puritan-type mother, things like this can be extremely akward, but they must be dealt with. Not only am I going to advise you to talk to her, but I'm going to tell you how to do it in a way that's more comfortable for the both of you.
First, you must find a time during which neither of you feel any sort of stress or pressure. You don't want her to lash out at you for something that you had nothing to do with (work-related stress, etc.). Then, you must pick a comfortable place to do this. Although I generally reccommend looking people in the eye when you speak to them, in this case, I think it'd be best if you were both in a place where you didn't have to look at each other (in the car, or watching a movie at home, for example). This way, the akwardness is somewhat alleviated. Finally, you just remind her that you are growing up and you are realizing that you have certain needs that you must fulfill. But also, reassure her that you are by no means having sex; this is your alternative to sex.
In all, remember to do this with delicacy and understanding. You have to try to imagine what that must have felt like for her.
Good luck!
]
Wow.
My mom have never caught me, and im never loud. My mom would probably be the same way. If I was you, If I was you, I would talk to her about it. Bring up the subject. Your not a slut, skank, whore <b> anything </b> so don't worry about it.
When she tells you how she feels, and how you feel, ask her when she masturbated, and if its ok if you go ahead with it. shes your mom, and she will understand.
If you need anything else, leave it in my inbox
♥
]
oh my geeze im your age and i have no idea what to tell you except to talk to your mom and tell her that you stoped.....
good luck with that 1
:]
]
Dear Caught in the Act,
It is not unusual for parents to have diffiuclty accepting their teens emerging sexuality..... especially if that parent has issues of their own in this area. Tell your mother you'd like to "clear the air" and see if she's open to talking about what happened. This might not be the most comfortable topic for either of you, but it sounds like it's time to talk.
As cool as it seems to have a "best friend" instead of a parent, that's usually not what is really going on. A good parent is clear about their role and does not feel the need to become a best friend. Insecurity about being a parent is usually what's behind this need to buddy up. Let's face it, peers do not have to set limits or boundaries in the same manner that a parent does.
I wish you well,
Earth Mother
]
ooohh.. well umm.. i have never been caught i do it dead of night late at night..lol now how to make you too get back together.. well my friend doesn't know i do it .. but she called me and read me an article on what she found... i heard it is healthy... it slows down the process of wanting sex actually and umm.. it is not a sin .. good for that.. uum... and it is just part of growing up.. so find research on it to make yourself sure.. and then .. just try to talk to your mom about it.. for more help on this problem .. contact me at prissychrissy101@hotmail.com
]
if your mom is being this immiture then ignore her back!! she has to accept that you are growing up and that she can't controll you forever!! Her beliefs and yours may not be the same, and as far as what she is saying about you to her friend is bang out of order because she is tellinbg everybody what is going on behind closed doors!!
Dannii n owen x
]
The best thing you can really do is confront her about it. Tell her how you feel, and since you guys used to have that kind of relationship, then maybe she'll understand
-BlackBatman-
]
More Questions: |