ok so, my dad is a complete jack ass, according to me, he is completly insane and its driving me crazy.....thats my dad
my mom is sick, she has manic depression, she bought a bottle of perscription drugs and hid the EMPTY bottle, so this gave my jack ass of a faher the idea that she was on drugs! she said she was giving them to her one friend who is the same way as her, manic depression, he just doesnt choose to go to the doctors.....thats my mom
well they have been argeing since before i was born, i recently found out<19 years by the way>,
it drives me nuts and my dad, i think and my mom does too, is a total NUTCASE!!!!! he bitches at everything and he even spit on my mom once, another ime, this was like 4 years ago, he pinned her down cuz he got mad. i called him mental! he was like yea yea yea you think whatever the hell you want and go on keep letting your damn mother put things into your head, i said that she doesnt but he wont believe me. they argue about everything, you name it they fight about it, we even went to counciling once, they dragged me and my sister ino it!,THEY FOUGHT ABOUT THAT WHEN WE GOT OUT OF OUR SESSIONS!!! its crazy. my mom is thinking about me her and my sister are gonna move out in a couple of months, im happy, the only problem is that i dont want her to be alone, in a single way, because she is sick. knowing that i know that when we move, im gonna be the one taking care of both my sister and my mom. which i am kinda used to but i dont know i just dont want to have all the stress of getting me AND my sister AND my mom up in the morning, and then coming home from school and cleaning the house and everything!! so my questions are, should i worry? and, Do you think that its a good idea for them to get a divorce? and how do i help my mom and me and my sister deal with my moms sickness once we move out? please dont tell me to suck it up, im only 14 years old and my grandmoher said i shouldnt have to deal with all this and that i have grown 2 years in only 6 months!! help me please there is just sooooo much stress!!
sorry its long but *ill rate 5's for n e one with a good answer
Your grandmother is right. Since you obviously have talked to her about this, please ask her to help. Even if you would stay with her for a while.
Okay, your Mom has a mental illness that needs to be treated by a professional. You did nothing to cause this, and by you taking care of her she will not get better. Do not feel guilty. Obviously your Dad does not understand the illness, but giving him the benefit of the doubt it can be extremely difficult to live with someone with untreated bipolor disorder.
Whatever problems they have are theirs to fix, to live with, or to get divorced over. Even if they try to involve you in some way, there is nothing you can do alone to change things.
If you can, ask to go to a counselor alone--or with your sister. Most will have a lot of information about the illness that your Mom has, and will know what to tell you so you can feel better. [ Nallie's advice column | Ask Nallie A Question ]
LJ answered Saturday May 6 2006, 1:20 am: This is a very tremendous burden even for an adult to be taking care of their family. Things will get bumpy at times. But all you have to do is realize that you are doing this out of love for your mother and sister.
Since your father has no evidence of changing his behavior than definately they should get a divorce. Or at least a separation period. Your father need to find the root of his problem before he can properly take care of his family. Otherwise it's better to keep distance.
You and your sister should find advise from a professional to deal with your mother. But generally, just be patient with her. Show her you love her. Make her proud. Just talk things out with her. This will be a stressful period. But just look at the end where your family will be happy, and you'll realize it'll all be worth the effort. [ LJ's advice column | Ask LJ A Question ]
TheTeenGirl answered Friday May 5 2006, 9:58 pm: I'm really glad to hear that you are moving out from your dad's behavior. Especially the fact that it also makes you happy.
Nobody will ever be able to tell you to just deal with it and suck it up. That's not really option when you are only a teenager feeling responsible for her mother and sister.
Just because you won't be living with your dad, it doesn't mean that you aren't any longer a family. You still have your mom and sister to work things out with and not the disruption of your dad's yelling and abuse toward your mom.
My suggestion would be to consider counseling just between you, your mom and your sister instead of your dad. I think that you'll have a positive experience this time around instead of being in a war between your parents. That way you all can deal with each other as a family. For helping your mom, just remind her of taking her medication or anything else that can help her depression. For your sister, I'm not too sure of what she needs, but just be her sister. If she's having a hard time with school, ask her if you can help her study or give her some advice on boys if she's younger.
I think that if you did do some more counseling, your counselor can help you and your sister find ways of dealing with your mom's illness. What you have to know is that things will only get better from here on out as soon as you move. Everything will honestly be alright for you and your family, and you just have to do your best at bonding and staying close with them.
OHilovetravis answered Friday May 5 2006, 9:51 pm: Hey Sweetie,
Honestly, you shouldn't be in the confliction your parent's are having. I think it is ridiculous how some adult's drag their children into everything.
As result to your problem, I think honestly that if your parent's have been arguing THIS long you should tell them how much you love them both an how you would feel if they weren't together ((only if you don't want them to split up)). But honestly if it has got to the point that your mom hides stuff from your dad then that is definetly how you know their love is starting to fade, also if your dad has touched your mom in any way than your definetly know it's not a good relationship. On the other hand I don't think you should be held responsible for your sister and mother, your mom should stand up an do something intead of letting you or your sister go down hill in school or something because your busy revolving your life around her and your fathers marrige.
If ya want my advice you should definetly try seeking someone's attention an exsplain to them what happened the last time you all tryed going to classes for your "Mother and Father's" personal problems toward each other.
Keep your head up baby girl I promice everything will be better in the end, an if it's not better than you know its not the end!!
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