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17/f
My boyfriend, Isaac, of 3 months, has been different lately. He doesn't call as often and he barely ever asks me to hang out .. i'm always the one asking him to hang out. (We see each other a few times a week.. but it keeps getting less and less.) My friend Nicolas was talking to Isaac (they are friends) and asking him how things were between me and Isaac. He asked Isaac if he was getting bored with me yet. Isaac said he wouldn't mind seeing me just once a week, and he didnt want Nicolas to think he was "pussy whipped." So Nicolas told me all of this. But the thing is, i dont know whether or not to believe it, because Nicolas also likes me and is jealous of me and Isaac. But I dont think he would lie, but its possible. But I'm going to assume it is the truth because it all makes sense. What should i do about Isaac? Should i just call him less and lay low for a while or what? Thanks, sorry it was long, i will rate high :)
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hey! ok well i would break it off w/ your recent b/f. tell him you want a guy who wants to be there and do things more often. i'd believe your friend b/c you know he cares enough to tell the truth. xoxo helpachick
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well, i think Nicolas is also telling the truth. Maybe Isaac is going through some peer pressure where he never gets to hang out with his friends as much as he used to and they are saying stuff like he's "pussy whipped". I think you should lay low and see him a little less, like he wants but make sure you talk to him about how he feels about everything before you do anything about it. Try to think of why he liked you in the first place and pay more attention to that feature about you and try to make him feel like you aren't controlling him even though you weren't in the first place.
On the other hand, if Nicolas was truelly lieing then i would watch out for him. I doubt it though because if he likes you enough, he wouldn't want to hurt you and he wouldn't be selfish like that.
Before you do anything, I would probably have a talk with Isaac but keep it open and not demanding answers. Don't ask alot of questions either. First, see how much he will tell you voluntarily and anything else he doesn't talk about you can question. (Guys hate when you ask to many questions, they feel as though they don't have any privacy and that they ARE 'pussy whipped') Trust me, I have alot of guy friends.
Hope I helped :)
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Its probably the only thing you can do. Insisting to meet more often will likely push him away from you. Give him some space and see how things develop in the near future. After a while he might start calling you more often. Either way, giving him space cannot do any harm.
As for what your friend Nicolas said, thats a tough one. I would not put it beyond some guys to make something up to get an edge. Do you have any past information to go on there... how prone is he to lying?, what has he done to impress other girls? etc.
Now, have you considered having a straight forward talk with your boyfriend? Just to ask him if anything is going on, if he needs space or whatever. As long as you dont put him on the defensive you might be able to have him tell you whats on his mind. Just make sure he understands you arent angry or anything, just a bit confused.
Well... I know this wasnt all that helpful, but I hope you could use it for something. Good luck to you.
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I think you ought to confront Isaac with what Nicolas told you. If Isaac confirms it, then have a discussion as to what you both want out of your relationship and see if you can work something out. If Isaac denies having said as much to Nicolas, one of two things are happening: (A) Nicolas lied to you, which is not cool, and you should probably reconsider whether you still want him as a friend or (B) Isaac is not being truthful with you, which coupled with his earlier avoiding behavior indicates he isn't worth keeping.
IMHO, the relationship seems to be winding down fast and you may want to start looking for someone else. One of my own boyfriends began avoiding me like that, and it turned out it was because he'd fallen for someone else. If he had just told me when it happened he would not have wasted so much of my time and his.
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Instead of Nicolas being the middle-man, go straight to isaac yourself. There's a chance your friend could be jealous, which could cause him to lie. So in order to be sure, you should really just ask your boyfriend to hang out, and then talk to him face to face. It's terrible to have serious conversations over the phone, because they could always be lying. That way, when you're in person with him you can see his facial reactions and see what he really means. It looks like this guy thinks more about what his friends think (referring to "pussy-whipped") rather than what he thinks.
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