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Not quite the void...
Hey. I'm 13/m and I accept none of that "teenagers don't know love" crap. Maybe most teenagers don't, but I'm not most teenagers. I had a friend from science class. Long story short, over the summer, I realized that I loved her, I told her, she didn't love me back, I experienced The Void, and pretty much every new true emotion, I couldn't get her out of my head, and then when school started, things were awkward. I can't think of any other way to describe it. It just felt awkward. Anyway, I talked to her about that yesterday, and she agreed. So now we just forgot anything ever happened and we're back as regular friends now. I had felt like crap for a really long time, and I seemed to screw absolutely everything up. Well, now that all this pressure is off of me, I feel a lot better and I'm back to my regular happy goofy self again. Which is good. Except I feel strangely empty inside. Just a tiny pit of blackness in my happy heart. It feels nothing like The Void at all. Just... emptiness. Why? What is it? What's all this about? Thanks in advance...
By the way, here are my standards on your answers: I will NOT always rate a 5, I will rate whatever I find appropriate. I will not always rate anyway, but I will try. I will not hesitate to give you a 1 or report you, I have been responsible for a number of permanent bans. So no smartass answers. And just a matter of personal interest, try to use proper grammar. Please.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
well its a feeling thats telling you that you cant love her and so your feeeling empty and lonely. personally i think you were a little too young to be feeling these emotions it was probably a feeeling of just liking her more than any other person. well what you should do is give yourself some space from her. dont be mean about it by ignoring her but just try hanging out with some other friends. this will make your feeeling of emptyness go away because you should probably forget these strong feelings for her. hope i helped buh bye! IF YOU NEED MORE HELP ABOUT THIS IM ME SOMETIME AND WE CAN TALK MY S/N IS T3RRI2010!!!
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My brillant answer goes as follows.
1. There is no such thing as "teenagers don't know love". Personally, I think love doesn't fall from the sky, but is built from scratch. Every little feeling you experience for someone else counts towards that definition of love, be it a junior high crush or the one you end up marrying.
2. What you're experiencing, I would call the void, not The Void. I think The Void occurs when you truly dedicated your heart to someone and saw it crushed with your own eyes, it's a feeling that robs you of all thoughts except the one that tells you what you're missing. However, since you realized that you are also missing her friendship, your Void was divided into two, the fact that she didn't appreciate you romantically, and the fact that she was your friend, and you communicated freely. Now that the awkwardness has been overcome, your Void has become a simple void, because there's a part of your feelings that have been filled, whilst the other half of you probably still lingers on the fact that you (maybe) still love her. It's the feeling of missing out on something, but not knowing what exactly, because you SEEM to have what you temporarily wanted.
To be quite truthful, I think you're older than your age. I think you'll be able to fill this void soon. Just ... stay in touch with your emotions, but don't let them control you, and don't dwell in the rainy, black corners of your heart.
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Alright, I'll answer you're question after I say this. Its not that "teenagers dont know love" its that its not going to be the same "love" as when you are older and more mature. Its a more immature love, the kind that teenagers get when they first jump in the game. Thats why (mostly) when you marry your highschool sweetheart, it tends to end in divorce. Although many marriages seem to end in divorce this day and age which must mean nobody really understands "love" anymore. :(
Anyway, what you probably are feeling my guess is...well, to face the facts, you have changed. You dont hold that innocence you had before you were with this girl. You are "emotionally scarred." It probably wont leave until you find that next girl you "love." Its probably because you rushed into the relationship...take it slow next time. You are only 13, which means plenty of more romance for you but if you dont go as fast you wont get as hurt.
Please is a fragment sentence. If you want someone to use proper grammar, I suggest using it yourself. As a matter of fact, a lot of your question has not been written with proper grammar.
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This feeling is kind of inbetween The Void and regularity. You are not as hurt as you were, but there is still something there. I have been there. (many, many, many times)The strange emptiness is probably coming from the fact that things got so screwed up in the first place. You seem to have been able to get back to friendship which is important, but just being around someone you love and can't have will have an effect on you even if you don't realize it. It is probably still bothering you somehow, but, that won't last. The thing about being so young is that it doesn't take long for another to grab your attention. I have to say, being 13 your vocab is excellent. You seem to have an understanding beyond your years (I say this not to get rated highly, but, because I know alot of people my own age that you just out shown)
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I think you're WAY TOO young to be feeling these emotions. Thirteen year olds should be happily playing in the fields of eternal bliss, not depressed over a female. You think you know what love is? Yeah, every teenager says, "I don't care what you think, I know what love is." I even said it. I come to realize four years later that I didn't. You let something get to you, you tried to be more mature than you thought you were, and now you're feeling down about it. Go do thirteen year old things. I don't know what you youngins do nowadays, but go and do it and stop moping around. You have your entire life ahead of you to mope.
Also, threats against advice givers is a bad idea. You're not big or bad because you've gotten people banned. I've seen people get banned because they report too much, so think about that as well.
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you are a demanding individual, little rat!!
lets see, the void is very common during your stage of social development, and shall remain for a while. do as i say, and it shall disappear as fast as possible.
1: look at other girls with a passionate vengeance. doing this, you will realize that they are all just as special as your recent crush, and eventually, you will develope a liking for one of them.
2:next time, don't come right out and say it. use tact and a facade of simplicity for example- "hey, do you want to see a movie on friday?"
I wouldn't reccomend a movie for the first date, maybe waffle house or another fine resturaunt of similar price.
3: they are to be hypothetically considered a piece of animate meat, until such a time as they have redeemed themselves with compassion, pity, or a date. their inherent ability to emotionally crush and conquer is a force to be reckoned with. treat them as they treat you.
4: they are not to be trusted with any complex duties or instructions. their ability to comprehend simple driving directions is stunningly bad, thats why men always pick them up instead of the reverse.
5:don't argue, submit to their overwhelming quick mindedness, otherwise you will become frustrated and feel impotent. quote-"do you want to be right, or live in peace?"
do this, and your life will be serene and complete.
-gunner
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Sorry if i dont use proper grammar, because when I type a lot and i type fast and it is not a "formal document" i don't do it, hope it doesn't bother you but I will try to avoid it.
Anyways - I think I understand the feeling you have because in a way i felt it for a bit. Like you are missing something, this something is probably that love you had for your friend, even though you said you were back to just being friends and stuff. You may just still have a little bit of that feeling in your heart for her to answer that part, even if you think its gone. Sometimes telling yourself that "that feeling" is gone isnt right, because your heart still feels "that feeling", if that makes sense. Basically what I am saying is you can't tell your heart to feel a certain way, it just feels it anyways. You just have to give your heart time to move on and accept things, its difficult but if your friend doesnt like you like that...then you gotta try to move on. good luck and hope i helped!
*twizz
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I know what you mean. When I see this guy who rejected me for someone else I always kinda feel a twinge. I figure it's because in your mind you've devoted so much time to thinking about them and learning their hobbies and favorite colors and things like that then one day it all ends and you stop thinking of them when you pick out your clothes or when you eat their favorite ice cream, Just stop cold turkey. I guess all the time you've devoted to them just gets sucked into this sort of black hole of emotional depression (AKA The Void I suppose). And stuff. I mean, that's how it was for me. That blackhole for me now is barely a pinpoint. I really haven't had any other "crushes" or whatever since this guy but I've gotten way more involved in my friends and people who really care about me. So yeah. Just concentrate on the things you do for you and the people who really love you.
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Hey, you have an intresting case. I'm 13 myself and i can understand where your coming from. Girls, are, obviously, alot different than guy, but not just physically, emotionally as well, as you probably know. What i think is that she's young as well, and i guess it's all just to fast for her. Just keep being friends and whenever she's ready she'll tell you or whenever you think she fells more ready make a move. I'm sorry if i'm no help, but i hope i did!
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