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hurting....
what should i do.... today my boyfriend and i were fighting and i hit him... not to hard but he threw me down on the ground and hit me i think mabey 3 times... not hard... but enough to cut my ear open in 3 places... yea i know messed up... but ive been with him for 3 years and i love him to death and i cant leave him... thats not an option... what should i do?
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oh wow. i hope that is the first time he's ever done that. he's abusing you. you should leave him. you could get legal protection if you needed too, or you could just talk to him and ask him if he could just not throw you around.
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well you should maybe talk to him about it and ask him if he could maybe not hit you or throw you to the ground.. you could also go to counseling with him and you could talk about better ways you guys could control your anger.. and if it continues to happen you might want to say to him if you dont stop doing this im going to break up with you (just to threaten him) and see where it takes you from there... hope i helped...
*k La*
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you should leave him. you don`t deserve that.
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you HAVE to leave him, and it IS an option. He can't beat you around like that, and he cut your ear open. He sounds manipulative, and you have to get out of that relationship.
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you obviously cant be mad at him. If he punched you first, im sure you would have done the same thing. I answer every question saying this, but its true!!! you need to talk it out. You need to tell him how the fight is something in the past, something that later we may be able to joke about. You just need a fresh new start. Theres a chance that this wont work, depending on your boyfriend. But- never know till ya try
xxmymatrixmanxx
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You should talk to him about it. If this is the first time, then you should definitely talk to him about this. Talk to him and let him talk and get all the dirty laundry out there. Please, do not let this lead to another fist fight . This should be done very calmly and thought out rashionally. After this talk, and another physical fight occurs and he hits you, I'm sorry but you need to leave. Men that do stuff like that do not stop unless they receive help and even that isn't a 100% guarantee that he won't swing at you again.I don't care if you spent three years with this guy when it comes to the fact that he hits you, and if he does it again then you really shouldn't care either. Don't waste anymore years on him if he does it again because if he does it again then he doesn't deserve you.
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I'm sorry, but the odds are that your relationship with him is hopelessly poisoned. When you get into a fist-fight with your significant other, it's a pretty clear sign that things are NOT right.
It's likely that things will get worse between you. Violence will erupt MORE easily from now on. It will take less and less provocation for either of you to start hitting. And the violence will get more extreme.
You can love him all you want...but you really shouldn't stay with him. And since you threw the first punch, I'd *strongly* urge you to get counseling. You need to find out why you crossed the line, and find a way to make sure that it doesn't happen in your NEXT relationship. This is just a guess, but you probably need to work on anger management.
Okay, now I'll be realistic. I realize that you said that leaving him is "not an option". And I know that people often DO insist on staying in abusive relationships, even if it literally kills them. Which it sometimes does.
So...if you INSIST on staying with him, which (I'll say it again) is a REALLY BAD IDEA...then at the least, the two of you had better get into couples counseling. That might at least give you both a chance to learn how to handle your disagreements, no matter how intense, with words rather than your fists.
Good luck. I'm afraid you'll need it.
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Wow! Ok, I have been in your shoes. First off, dont ever feel like just because you have been with someone for a LONG TIME that you have to stay with them. You should never stay with someone JUST BECAUSE you feel sorry for them or you feel that you owe it to them and have to stay with them. THERE IS ALWAYS THE OPTION OF LEAVING THEM! So, for you to say that you can't leave him is not true. Trust Me! You Can! Secondly, I would suggest leaving this guy! I was with a guy for almost three years and for about the last year and a half of it, I WAS MISERABLE! See, it all starts with the mental abuse. There are usually control issues, verbal abuse, and prolly even mind games! I have experienced all of these! Then, once an argument starts to excalate to a certain point, after the verbal abuse, physical abuse becomes much easier! My ex boyfriend treated me like an angel until we got to college. Then he started getting really jealous of my friends and starting trying to control me. BEFORE I KNEW IT, HE SMACKED ME a few months later! It only gets worse from there! Trust Me! So, if he is already punching you, just imagine what will come next. Seriously! All of these things I have mentioned are like "Red Flags" telling you to get out of the relationship ASAP. I would suggest doing that! Don't feel like you can't! Lastly, if you HONESTLY want to work harded to make this work and you think you REALLY CAN then I would suggest getting help. I would say that you need to work on your anger manangement just as much as he does seeing as you HIT him first! But, hoenstly, would you want to spend the rest of your life with someone that has once "Threw You To The Ground And Hit You". Are these the memories you want to have of the person your spending the rest of your life with? I would hope not! Search for something more sweetie! Trust Me! There are nice guys out there! My current boyfriend is the best thing that has ever happened to me! I am so happy that it's unreal and you can be too! I hope you want that for yourself hunni! Well, please take my advice with an open mind. Let me know if you ever need anything! Thanks Sweetie! Best Of Luck! *Hugs*
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Leave him gal.
If this is what hes like now imange him in 5 years time.Yea you were in the wrong hitting him first and all andyou guys would of had alot of mixed emotions during the fight and everything butthats no reason to get violent.If you love him wayto much to get ovah him and havetried everything to get ovah him ,you should both trycounciling together,anger management and all that.So in the end you have two choices.1. ditch the guy.or .2. stay and get help aye.Its your decision and dont take the highway option!!
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i know how it is hunn .. ive had the same problems with my bf of 1 1/2 years .. but now
he is in jail for what he has done to me .. so
i suggest you suggest to him about counseling ..
we were headed towards it but never got in to it
in time .. trust me if he keeps this up he will
be just like my bf .. and thats not good ..
just 2 weeks ago he choked me right in front of
my best bud .. then they got into a fight and
then we took off with our car .. he came up
behind us and rammed into us several times ..
making us almost spin out .. he finally did it
one last time and then spun out .. he was injured
but everyone knows he should have died he wasnt
wearing a seatbelt or nothing .. he was bleeding
pretty bad .. but yeah he had to go to the
hospital but right after he recuperated he was
rushed to jail .. i just talked to him last week
but now i cant anymore .. i will be goin to court
in a week for it .. i have to be questioned and
shit .. but hey if you guys want to end up like
us .. then dont get help .. but i really do
suggest you tell him that you two should both
get counseling .. or maybe talk about it .. tell
him my story .. that it could happen to you guys
well thanks .. if your in another problem just
ask me babesz, Nikky Alese
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apolagize say I dont know What got into me and Im sorry. good luck! :)
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