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what should i say? and do?
ok i have a friend who has this b/f. HE and she have been going out for 5 months at the most and he has already popped the question... She doesnt' know what to do... She is barely graduationg this year and he is still a junior. She fills presherd and stuff and he has already been talking about having kids with her... she is scared and she even feels like not coming to school because hes here... what should she do? She doesn't want to hurt him though so please give good advice i rate high.....
thank you
some-1-whocares...
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I think she needs to tell him exactly what she feels. Tell him he is moving WAY TO FAST! She needs to be careful that he isn't the overly possessive type. They don't make the best partners. If she really, really likes him she needs to be very honest with him. If she can take him or leave him then I'd be gone! :)
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She needs to tell him that he's smothering her, and that they have their whole live ahed of them to worry about marrige and kids, and that they should just enjoy life now. If this doesn't work, she might need to dump him.
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she needs to tell him to fuck her brains out, get her preggo and leave:)....that way she doesnt have the presure of him being around all the time yet she can still get his check in the mail:)
happy caring!
nichole
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If she doesn't want to marry him, she should really tell him. If he loves her, he'll understand. If she's sure she likes him, maybe they could get promise rings together. She needs to tell him that she's just not quite ready yet, and she should have some reasons why to help him understand.
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I think she should suggest that they discuss it with his parents. They will probably help him see the light. That he is much to young to be thinking about that. She should also try talking to him about their future plans. Not together. Separately. Like college, jobs, trips vacations. Hard to do all these things when you have a couple if kids in tow. She has to tell him, nicely that if they are to enjoy a long and happy life together , they have a lot to do before they get married and have children. She can say she is just to young to even think about it and doesn't want to talk about it any more.
Michele
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That's kind of a short time to already be asking someone to get married... but whatever... ok, your friend definently needs to talk to him about this. If she feels pressured and is trying to avoid him, then maybe she should break up with him...... it doesn't sound like she's exactly happy with it.
The more she tries to avoid him, the more she's hurting him.. she just needs to tell him how she feels. It still will hurt him, but there's really no other advice I can offer... maybe a promise ring instead?
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If she's bothered by his obsession with lifelong commitment maybe it's time for them to break up. If she thinks he will give her trouble she should tell her parents and have one of his parent's phone numbers or email addresses where she knows she can reach them in case he does harass her. It doesn't sound like she's in a very healthy relationship right now, and she needs to realize that being in a relationship means that your needs are just as important as your boyfriend's - he needs to understand that as well. If she's scared that he'll overreact if she breaks up with him she should do it in a safe, public place like a shopping mall or school; bringing a friend is also a good idea (though they should keep their distance during the breakup.)
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personally.. my boyfriend and i talk about having kids and having a family together all of the time. however, hes just graduating and im a sophomore in high school. so therefor we're still kind of young for that. tell your friend that she needs to sit down and talk to her bf and kind of adress to him that they are still so young and getting engaged may be the wrong thing to do. possibly talk about a promise ring insted. meaning the ring is there on her finger as a promise to stay true to him.... then later on in life get engaged.
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