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Ok... I was in a porno Video cause i needed money to go to a school trip in France..! But now All of the guys at my school .. Are porno freaks.!! and all they want is sex from me..! i dont want to give sex to them cause i only did that 1 time to get money for a trip and all the girls think im a slutty ass bitch.. and im not i was always the nice girl and now after one mistake i am called a slut! All the guys try to talk me into sex but i dont want to.. when i go on a date i always get forced to hhave sex. its really annoying and bad.. I hate it and i dont even think i want to go on this trip. after all thats happening.. One of my friends told me that She over heard her boyfriend and his friend saying that this kid that goes to our school may rape me.. Im scared and i dont want to start more drama .. Not only that but the tape was sold on the internet. Im doomed for life. What do i do to repair my reputaion and stay away from getting raped..
any advice is apperciated..
Ps- IM NOT A SLUT!
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ok well first be liek im better htan you mare sexy n stuff then mabey you can liek make another porn video thats like not porn at all its like an appology tape and put it on the internet and id be liek look im not a slut i did it because i needed money for a school trip .. hope it works out for you. JESSiCA
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omg i feel so bad for you just tell them why you did it
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I lost my original response, so I'll post a point by point. But before I say anything, I want to tell you that no matter what kind of idiotic mistake you've made, you're still a worthy, decent person with the same rights as everyone else. However, you're going to have to work a littl harder to get the peace that you deserve.
Anyway, point-by-point...
-"was in a porno"
Well, think about the situation there. Were you underage when it happened, or 18? If you were underage, report the company to the authorities, even if you got in with a fake ID. They should be much more thorough in identifying and validating the ages of their talent. If you were over eighteen, I'm afraid there's little to nothing you can do.
Also, was it an "ameteur" film, or one through a professional studio? You're at a much higher risk of problems if it was an ameteur film, becuasce professional studios regularly test their talent for STDs. However, regardless of what kind of film it was, you need to go get tested. One test for most "normal" diseases should be acceptable, but it's very important to get two HIV tests--one now, and one in six months. The porn industry recently had an HIV scare, and most porn companies do not use condoms (no, I don't know from experience, I just have a lot of pervy male friends). It may be hard to find a clinic that will do this for you affordably and without your parents' permission, but they can be hard. Try searching for one on a search engine ("planned parenthood" is a good starting search term). Also, get a home pregnancy test, even if it's been a few months. Just to be safe. My contacts tell me they're very cheap.
-"i needed money"
If you still need money, try McDonald's or your local grocery store.
-"all they want is sex from me..! i don't want to give sex to them"
Then don't go out with them. If you do go out on dates, do only group dates, with another girl THAT YOU TRUST and another guy. Group dates and singles alike, don't go to movies or other dark places (except arcades that are filled with kids and parents. That should be okay), don't go to places that are kinda risque, and don't go to places where it'd be easy for the guy to get you alone. Try to keep to family-oriented or family-friendly dates, like dinner at "family" places and bowling. And whatever you do, DO NOT RIDE IN THE CAR WITH YOUR DATE. You say you've been forced into sex (i.e. rape), don't take that chance again. Also, don't do any more than kiss them, even after the first date. You need to send a mesage of repentant chastity, both for your safety and reputuation. Don't EVER be alone with the guy. Ever.
-"girls think i'm a [expletives deleted]"
Well, good for them. You need to not care wh at they think. Find a few whom you can trust--even if you have to befriend geeks and underclassmen--and stick with them. Forget everyone else. Your reputation is beyond salvation--everyone's high school reputation is only changeable by scandal--so focus on your happiness and safety.
-"when i go on a date I always get forced to hhave sex."
This, my dear, is called rape. The fellows who did this to you need to be reported to the authorities and prosecuted, if not for your sake, then for that of other girls in your situation. You must not let this happen again. Also, make sure to get tested for STDs and pregnancy after this. I think you have to wait until a missed period, or a period or whatever, for a pregnancy test to be accurate though... so wait at least that long since the last time you had sex.
-"i dont even think I want to go on this trip"
Why not? You got the money, why not use it. Just make sure that your roomate for the trip is someone you trust, and never leave her side unless you're both locked in your hotel room. Always stay aware and alert, and don't drink or do anything illegal or irresponsible on the trip. And always lock your hotel room door at night.
-"this kid ... may rape me"
This is the IMPORTANT PART.
Now, regardless of whether the rumor is true or not, you need to be very careful about your safety.
Start varying your routine. Mix it up day to day; don't always take the same routes to and from school or any other place, and try to vary the times you do things. Just keep it changing. Don't ride, walk, or go anywhere alone, not even to school. Start picking up a friend or some underclassmen every day and dropping them off if you drive to school; if you ride the bus, sit up front by the little kids. If you walk, find someone to walk with.
Consider carrying pepper spray or some other non-lethal weapon. Have it with you at all times, except when at school or at school events. Do NOT leave it in your car if you drive to school, and do NOT have it on your person during school if you walk or ride the bus. It may be illegal to possess at school. Be prepared to use other objects as weapons if you are attacked. Keys are good for scratching, you can hit people with your purse, etc. Talk to your local Girl Scouts, YWCA, or 4H about self-defense classes; they can hook you up.
Also, you may want to start keeping a cell phone and a personal alarm. Try to sleep away from windows, or in more internal rooms of the house... Get your hair cut short, or wear it in a hat. DO NOT wear your hair in ponytails, pigtails or buns (it's easier for men to grab you). Never go into shady places unless you're in a group of three or more TRUSTWORTHY girls. Never walk home alone. ALWAYS STAY ALERT.
Talk to your parents about what's going on; they can help in all regards... Unless you're certain that you're going to be severely punished. They may ground you, but if you're in danger of being raped, that may not be a bad thing for the time being.
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Just be careful, stay alert, and don't sweat all the stupid girls who are calling you names. In a few years, you'll graduate and leave this behind, and while the odd person may recognize you from the porno, the odds of anyone doing so--or feeling a need to say anything--will diminish greatly. And if all else fails, hair dye is your friend.
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ok i see you may have need money and i would have probly did the same thing if i was in your shoes but when a guy ask you for sex becuse of what the heard that your a slut just look at them and luagh and walk away and don't listen to what pepole say just brush it off you know the truth you don't have to explain your self to them just ignore all the drama there probly just jerkes you know who your true friend are so brush it off and keep moveing forward
ps. hope my advice help you thrue the drama !!!!!!!
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wow well IM NOT A SLUT you should have never done that in the first place you really ruined your reputation and there isnt anything you can do to fix it i would suggest moving and starting a new life
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Dear Not A Slut, You march your way down to the police station and tell them exactly what is going on. People make mistakes, i've made my share and trust me, it always works out in the end. You have to face this dead on. I'm being totally serious, tell the police. The issue right now is not your reputation and what people think of you, you could get raped. Stop it now before it happens, i'm begging you. Tell your parents also, you need that support around you. Tell them why you did it. I'm a mom, and no matter what my daughter ever does, i will always love her and get her through anything. Let me know, Luann
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Wow. That sucks. Well... YOu cant. Move from where you live.
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Hi there. Wow. You are really going through a rough time. Okay, about this mistake, you didn't make a mistake, you made a choice. You chose to do this film in order to have the option to go to France. It turned OUT to be a big mistake. So, in order to repair your reputation, and it CAN be done, is to make better choices for your future. You need to think about your decisions before you make them, and think about the consequences also. It is NOT the end of the world. It seems like it now, but trust me, lots of people do all sorts of things and the only difference between you and them is that YOU got caught. So, please don't buy into all the horrible things that people may say about you. You are guilty of bad judgement.
Okay, next about the being forced to have sex. It is not only "annoying and bad", it's illegal. It's called rape. What you need to do is call a rape crisis center immediately. They can suggest other avenues for you to take regarding this issue. Also, if you are going out, please go out with other friends that you can trust with your life. Stay in groups of people or somewhere there are adults around. You need to confide in someone also. Someone who can help to protect you. That is why there are guidance counselors. Go to one or to your parents. It will be difficult but you need to talk this out with people who have experience. Please do not wait. Like I said before, this is not the end of the world, but you will have to work at it. Right now, it's a big deal but believe me, in another month or two, someone else will do something that will take the spotlight off of you. Please let me know how it works out.
Linda
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i dont consider you a slut for doind that.. alot of girls i know are stripping for money so they can go to college.. but um hun im not real sure on how to repair something like this..it sounds like its a little to late to try and do something bout it not.. i mean keep your respect for yourself and not let guys force you into sex.. hold down a good reltionship before having sex with somebody.. and about the rape thing well okay thats a rumor.. and first of all if he was really planning on raping you he wouldnt be tellin everybody... his ass would get caught in a minute if he actually did do it.. i wouldnt really worry about it to much but to be on the safe side i would maybe not do things by yourself stay close with some friends.. and watch out for eachother..much luv dez x0x0
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just let it go... carry a kinfe with you make sure it is under 5 1/2 inches. if someone tries to get itno you just jab in itno thier leg and twist it so the wound doesn't heal propely
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i'm really srry but you pretty muhc have ruined your life.... this kind of stuff lasts forever.... i'm not sure on how to truely help.... but the regaining your reputaion thing is going to be hard... but if you don't wann get raped, learn to defend yourself and avoid being alone at night around places those guys might be. i'm very sorry about all of this and i hope it all gets better
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I don't think you are a slut, but, it's a bit too late to repair your reputation. But then again, look at Paris Hilton. Don't let them treat you differently, I'm sure they have done things that they wouldn't want everyone to see on camera. Stay away from the group that "wants to rape you" and ignore it. ♥
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