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Shallow?
I'm 14-years-old so I'm not looking for my life partner or anything. Well, my friends and even some people I don't know call me shallow because I only go out with guys I think are hott. And it's true but only to a certain point. Yes, I do look at looks first but doesn't everyone? I look at looks and if I think they're attractive then I'll talk to them and such. But I'll only date them if they have a great personality to go along with their looks. Personality can also make a guy hott to me so even if I'd initially think they were ugly but they had a confident, amazing personality I'd think they were hott. And like I said before, it's not like I'm looking for they guy I want to marry right now; I'm just having fun and meeting different guys. Does the way I see that make me shallow? Or is the way I pick the guys I want to go out with wrong?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
It's never wrong to be physically attracted to someone. It just happens. As long as you're interested in the total package (his personality, beliefs, intelligence, etc.) then you're all set.
Your friends may be turned off if you are constantly scoping guys and making comments about which ones are hott and which are not. If you do this a lot, that may be what is making them upset.
Otherwise, you're on the right track. Ignore anyone who tries to put you down!
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Why wouldn't you turn anyone down because of looks?
I think ugly people put too much emphasis on the "inside." Your outer appeareance is just as important as your inner! Sure beauty fades, and all that, but that doesn't mean you should let yourself go and not take care of your appeareance.
And don't think you are just this awful shallow person, because your not. There are a lot worse people. But I think we are all a little shallow being teenagers.
And your completely right about how it's not like your looking to marry anyone. Just have fun, enjoy the time where you don't have to worry about if your boyfriend/girlfriend is the person you wanna spend the rest of your life with.
Hope I helped,
-milkcarTON08
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NOOOOO! you're fine. Thats how most people are. unless they're purposely looking for someone ugly to go out with (which is kinda weird). EVERYONE begins friendships with people (of the opposite sex) b/c they're attracted to them. Don't listen to the people calling you shallow b/c i'm sure that they're the same way! Good Luck Girl!
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that doesn't make you shallow at all! i mean you're young, and if you aren't ready for a real commitment, then i don't see the big deal with having fun and meeting different guys! as a matter of fact, i know a bunch of girls who are like that. you should be able to have fun now that you are young.. but don't turn guys down just because they aren't very attractive. but as i read, you don't, so it's all good! you are innocent. =)
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Okay, to answer your question in short, you are so not shallow. It's called being a normal human teenage girl. The fact that you took the time to explain the whole thing shows that you do really truly care about how you come off and such. A shallow person wouldn't care less. If you ask me, I think you sound really level headed. At your age, relationships shouldn't be so serious and dramatic (as some make it) You should just go with the flow, and that's what it sounds like you are doing. And the fact that you don't judge soley on looks is a good thing. And you are totally right personality can make a huge different a be a key factor in being interested in someone. Almost all of my boyfriends haven't been the hottest guys in the world, but they had awesome personalities nad qualities. That made them so hott to me. That sounds like it's the same with you. I think you should just ignore your friends remarks about you being shallow, I mean you know you aren't, and that's the only opinion that you should really think about. You have to be at least someone attracted to a person in order for there to be any kind of initial reaction. The way you are choosing to picguys at this point in your life is not wrong because it's what's working for you. Just keep on doing what your doing. Have fun and live your life as a normal 14 year old. As long as you are yourself and a good person, you can't go wrong. :)
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well yeah in a way that is shallow but most people do look at looks so i dont know you have to get to know the person and all but dont judge all on looks they can be the most sexiest guy in the whole intire world but have the worst attitude and you wont know b/c uyou dont judge them on there personality well i hope i helped rate me please
drjwlc4
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I believe that you arent but the people that are calling you shallow need to look in the mirror. We all go for looks, maybe not entirely but whoever says looks dont matter 100% are lying. really. Because I go for looks as well..and so does everyone else. Dont worry..screw all those people who are talking crap!
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Hey.....Nah, i dont really think it makes you shallow, because everyone does look for someone that is somewhat good looking and plus you do count personality
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Dear Shallow,
NO WAY! There is nothing wrong with only wanting to be with someone you find attractive. And your young so why not surf the waters a bit. Even though I think it's fine for you to date only people you find attractive I also do think it IS wrong for you to turn someone away simply based on looks.
You cant always look as beautiful as you are inside. Keep this in mind. Also understand that beauty can build with time. You may find a person not as beautiful when you first meet him/her but if you care about them.. all of a sudden they become the most beautiful person you've ever met. If you turn away people you dont find attractive at first glance you may very well be turning away your prince charming.
Best of Luck,
She Screams.
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i will tell you what you are doing a good job just look for guys who make you feel comfortable and that is nice to you!
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