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Seems like yet again im doing myself wrong..
idk why im doing this its like i cant help myself, its like this..im forcing my self into solitary confinement, where i'd be alone im pushing everyone away but i dont think they really notice im pushing away at everyone i love, my friends my girlfriend even my sister who is the prety much like my gaurdian angel..i dont know whats wrong with me.. i guess i just snapped during school, but im using what sanity i have left to ask whats wrong. i dont have any reason to do this its wierd but i cant help it. its like im addicted to being alone..idk..its wierd i guess in myself i think that the answer to not being alone is by forcing myself to be alone and the less people care about me the less i care about me to, call me an attention whore call me what you want i dont know wtf is wrong with me.but i'd still like some advice. i've considered suicide millions of times and i've attempeted it god only knows how many times. im starting to be convinced that something wont let me die. i know that doesn't make sense, but it does to me...Am I Addicted to the Pain & Sorrow of Isolation?
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well... thoughts of suicide are always hard. trust me. i've learned that one day you'll realize how dumb it was to think of suicide in the first place. You'll end up noticing everything around you. I know exactly how ya feel I was just like you when I had started cutting and it got really bad. but it's cleared up now. Sad thing is I had to do it on my own. The point is... even if u like being alone.. find one really good pal that you can just tell everything and know that they won't leak stuff out. That's what I had a small yet very good support group of friends... when I was down they helped me through out the day and stuff. It should help you too. I'm here if ya need me too.
Sam.
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well one good thing is that the people that really love you will always come back to you no matter how hard you oush them away. but look there could be a million reasons why you do this to yourself. i dont know enough about you to say what that reason may be. and an addiction can be defined several ways too. but i think everyone battles this one at some point in their lives. i kno this probably hasnt helped at all so far. being alone is honestly my greatest fear. and the way i deal with that is by constantly putting myself with people i enjoy being around. instead of worrying about why youre doing this think about how youre going to stop. suicide is not the way to do that. i know you feel like its the only way out but really just hang in there and take it one damn day at a time. i wish there was more i could say but i think this is it. please stop attempting suicide because the one time you succeed could be the day you realize you wanna live and the day before things start to get a little brighter...and it would be too late.
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ur prolly depressed like me. theyl give u Prozac er somethin and it will make u feel soo much better! trust /e... and sory bout the way uve been feelin. you should explore nature, and like go outside and look at birds and interesting things u can find thats what i do, and it amkes me forget bout my sometimes crappy life.
-Connie
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that is perfectly normal. Sometimes we just don't understand exactly why were so upset when everything is going just fine in our life. i dont want to say it's depression cuz for me there was nothing to be depressed about. I just wanted ppl to stay away from me, yet i loved them. i think that's what u were trying to say? w/e the case don't take away all ur time of being alone. It's always nice to be alone. when you are alone write down ur feelings or listen to music. express yourself in a non-violent way. Maybe talk to ur sister or something, and when you can hang out with ppl. Make sure you don't push them away. Don't attempt suicide, i don't see what it accomplishes you're taking away something that's not yours. Sorry if u dont want to hear it but it's God that isn't letting u die. Maybe he doesnt want you to die yet. I dont know if you know Jesus or anything but mayb you should talk about him to someone. If your asking y there is pain in ur life...mayb it's cuz ur rejecting jesus. anyways about suicide I think it's a bit selfish ur making those grieve around you. anyways stay close to friends, express yourself, and talk to someone. good luck, I really hope u get better! (sry this was so long)
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Your suffering from depression, and to fix it, you have to find out why you want to do these things? Why do you want to kill yourself? Why do you want to be alone? I think every teen goes through depression...Many do, but there's always a reason for it. Why not try to go out with your friends, or sister to the movies? Or you can just go out and have a good time. Being alone is a good thing sometimes, but yeah, your starting to do that alot and that's going to make you more depressed. Instead of being alone, alwayd be around people and just forget about everything and have a good time! It'll work...I used to be soo depressed and I tried killing myself a million times, over things that I now think were stupid. I still get depressed every now and then, but I deal with it, by being with friends, not being alone because it makes it so much worse. *Good Luck...and if you ever want to ask me anything please send me a note. I hate it when people feel this way...*
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