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Christmas
My boyfriend will not be getting me a chritmas gift this Christmas. I have already purchased his gift and given it to him because he needed it early (an expensive snowboarding coat). I am trying not to be upset. Times are tough, money's tight, the problem is he spent $200 on his mom's CD player, and bought his dad a forutne in hunting gear and we went out all weekend and he had no money problems then. Sunday we went shopping and he mentioned that he looked at his account and he's going to have to write a bad check so that he get his sister a gift. I told him not to worry about me, he says he's really sorry (he's really beating himself up over it) and that he'll get me something great the next paycheck, which won't be until January 5th. Am I being stupid and girly because my feelings are hurt?
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no u have a rite to have hurt feelings.. but if he loves u he will get u something.. even if it is late.. he sounds like an excellent guy cause he cares about his family and u enough not to jus get the first thing he sees. dont let it get to you. and tell him its ok.. u can wait
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It's normal to feel awkward and upset about this. I understand how you're feeling...that's happened to me before with some of my family members. I'm not upset AT THEM, just upset. Like your boyfriend said, he's really sorry and next paycheck he'll buy you something. If he doesnt buy you something within two weeks after that, then I would be upset only because he said it, and it was all a lie. But if he didn't say anything in the first place, then I would feel a little more content about the whole thing. Do you get what I'm saying?
I hope I helped, I know I didn't say much about what you should do, but there's really nothing you can do except wait. It's okay to be upset....just don't be mad at your boyfriend
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No, not at all. We all like to know the imortance we have in the lives of those we care about. And although Christmas HAS become a bit commercialized, it still remains a good gauge by which we judge such importance. The fact that he spent so much on his parents is no big deal. They're his parents. But, I feel a bit suspect of his having to "write a bad check" for his sister. I don't know him and maybe his is...but that leads me to ask what is he going to do when he gets that "next paycheck"? If it was me, I would HAVE to take the money and pay off the check before firther costs incur, and I'd almost bet the Pope's last dollar that he will do the same. Nevertheless, he could've gotten you "something"...ANYTHING. It could have been something small and he could've always gotten you something else later. I'm sure the thought behind it would have carried you over until a later date. I also think he was banking on your saying not to worry about you. That's why the subject was broached in the first place. Now, I'm not saying he's not a good guy, or is not worth your time and that you should turn coat and run to the hills. I'm simply saying it's not too much for you to ask that you are shown your importance in his life. Whether it be by a a gift, card, flowers or hell, even a hand-written poem. Wait until the "next paycheck" before drawing any conclusions. I DO know that times ARE hard. Happy holidays.
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its perfectly normal to be upset, especially when hes made every effort to get everyone else their gifts, however as you told him its a problem he may honestly believe you dont mind. You have two options, tell him how u really feel and possibly make him feel even worse or wait till his next paycheck and make him get you something really extra special to make up for it!
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A little bit. Tell him not to write a bad check, for one thing--when they bounce, they charge you $25.00 on TOP of what you owe with the check. He's being rediculously materialistic. Instead of stealing and lying to get his sister a present, which is what he's doing, he should just give her an IOU or, god forbid, MAKE her something. I'm sure it wouldn't kill him to make a batch of cookies or something. Instead of demanding an expensive gift from him, try doing what poor people like me do on dates--enjoy each other's company in a cost-free, romantic setting. I sure hope it doesn't take money to force you two to have a good time.
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No that’s normal, you got him something and even though it was his family he spent the money on you probably feel less important, less of one of his priorities, but before you get to upset wait and see if he will come through with his Jan 5th paycheck, try and understand that family comes first weather you like it or not... what your feeling is fine just don't get too upset till the situation pans out...
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Well, it's normal to feel this way...but obviously you care about him which probably means you trust him. If he says he'll get you your present in a couple of weeks, and he's beating himself up about not having one for you now, i'm sure he'll go through with getting one for you as soon as possible. Also, you can't deny, he's got to be really sweet to get all that stuff for his family. I'm sure your just as important to him as they are. But just because your getting your present late, doesn't mean that he doesn't love you just as much as them. So just don't worry about it for now. Your time will come (January 5th). It will be fine, and to answer your question..it is a little girly, but that's to be expected..seeing as though you are a girl lol. And theres nothing wrong with that. And last off, your definatly not being stupid.
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No you are not being stupid and girly. It is perfectley normal to feel the way you do and I dont blame you for it. I would feel pretty crushed myself. Dont worry though you will get a gift in January!
-shay :-)
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Well don't get mad. he's your boyfriend give him some time to get things together; If you give him time I think he'll do something really specal for you.
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No, I definately think you're dealing with total crap here. It was stupid and selfish of him to accept such a nice gift from you without stopping to think about whether he'd be able to afford your gift after everyone else's.
Gifts are gifts and you're not supposed to just expect people to get you stuff, that's kind of against the point. But the fact that he'd spend so much money on Christmas gifts tells me that he's got some screwed up priorities. He's a loser and you shouldn't be with him... I know it sounds shallow but your life will be very difficult if you tie yourself to someone who's so horrible at managing money. There are lots of people living paycheck to paycheck and that's okay, but most of them don't spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars on Christmas presents for each person in their family, that's just irresponsible. You probably won't listen to me but trust me, wait until after the holidays are over and then get out of this relationship. You gotta look at the signs.
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