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Q: Okay,so me and this guy have been together for about 10 months, and he is completely faithful to me, like he doesn't even talk to other girls hardly ever, and he never hangs out with any other girls but me. But the other night he went to a party last minute and was completely wasted, and girls showed up and one locked him into a bedroom with her and started coming onto him, they ended up having sex. I found out about this a few days later, and he completely regrets it and he siad he had really no clue what was really going on that it went fast. we broke up, but we sitll talks and he says he wants nothing more than to be with me.. and like hes not even that kind of guy.he's not forceful, aggressive, or anything in that naturee if u know what i mean? and i mean we really had something speciall and i dont know what to do.. just let him go or try and makes thigns work? what do u think

i'll rate high
That same EXACT thing happened to me. You're hurt, but theres nothing you can really do about the pain. I would try to fix things with him. He didnt mean to do it.

I forgave my boyfriend and we are even better than before.

If you and your boyfriend can get through something like that, then you two are very strong people and deserve to be together.

Q: I have a friend, who I know her boyfriend of 6 months is cheating on her. I went ahead and told her...now I need to know what to tell her from here...I want to be there for her, but I don't know anything to help cheer her up? (Please keep in mind that I'm only in high school, so I'm limited)
Take it from someone who has been cheated on before...honestly, there is really nothing you can do. This is something that your friend and her boyfriend have to work out on their own. You can be there for her and comfort her, because, of course shes hurt. But really, all she needs is to clear things with her boyfriend. They may break up, but those things happen. And if they're strong enough they can get through it like me and my boyfriend did.

:) I wish your friend luck.

Q: So it seems no one cares that its right to wait untill marrage to have sex (in the chrsitian religon) and now to me it seems seroiusly wrong, but later on it probubaly wont. I just wanted to know at what age do most people lose it? Since im in 7th now, and next year is supposibly the year everyone starts. Most likly the guy I marry wont be a virgin, right? 5's for anyone who is reasonable.
No no no, don't have sex when youre in 8th grade, unless you feel ready. First of all, you're too young. And second of all, if you do have sex when you're in 8th grade, you run the risk of your reputation going downhill. As in, people might think you're a slut, etc.

I'm 17 and I just lost my virginity. I used to think people should wait til marriage, but then I found someone I love, blah blah.

But yeah, if it feels right, and you love the person, then I don't see any problem with it.

Q: Whats wrong with me? I always fantasize to be with a certain guy that i kno. Or sometimes ill cry becasue I know i cant have him. He is poor and spanish pluss hes ghetto and he stayed back twice for getting into a lot of fights. That not my type at all. but theirs so,ething about him. Hes funny and makes me laugh all the time. Out going and hes hot. Tons of guys are funny outgoing and hot but i dont know what it is about him. I dont know about him though i would never go out with him. i guess its just a little crush. I cant see him my mom doesnt want me to go to my grandmothers house and he lives across from her. I never reall ytalk to him he doesnt have aim and i dont know his number. what is it about him?
Of course you like him. He's a badass, a rebel as some would say.
Your mom can't keep you away from your grandmothers house forever. So next time you go, talk to him and get his number or something.

Q: There's this boy i really like but... i have a boyfriend and im going to be going out with him for 6 months this friday and I already had sex with him and I really like this kid named josh and we have 2 classes together and he’s in my grade. My friend asked him if he liked and and he was like ummmmmmmmmm ummmmmmm ummmm and asked who? And she said my name and he said ummmm no. how do I know if he likes me.??????!!!!!! Really need to know!! He’s moving to California in July and all I want is just a lil piece of him lol and I like in ny so we would NEVER see each other
It sounds like the guy doesn't even know who you are. So I doubt he likes you. I would stick with your boyfriend who actually has feelings for you.

Q:
where are places to get awesome and comfortable hoodies?
It depends, if you want regular hoodies with nothing on them, I would go to Walmart. They are cheap and really comfortable. But if you want something on them then all of the answers below are good places to go.

Q: if u smoke dose it come up on blood tests ? cuz i smoke but i dont want my mom to know and im getting a blood test and i dont know if the doctors or whoever can tell if i smoke when they test my blood so please help me!
If you smoke cigarettes, then no, they can't. However, if you are smoking weed, and they are actually looking for it then yes. But if they aren't taking the blood test to see if you're smoking specifically, then you might not get caught.

Q: Hi, I'm 13 years old, and i recently started cutting. Don't think " I'm a physco Freak " or whatever you want to call me. My Friend introduced me into it. She said it really helps. so one day i was really angry, i was crying and all, and i cut all up and down on my arm/wrist. To me, i felt better, but just the next day it hurted. From then on, i have been cutting myself all the time when i am mad. the last time i did was actually last night. I use " Scissors , Razors , Saftey Pin , or any sharp objects round the house " . my mom saw my arm by acident, and i told her i fell on a side walk. well my friends are so worried about me. they think im ganna end up killing myself, because i almost did. i really do hate my life even if i have friends and a boyfriend. i JUST hate it, and i think sometimes i was just a mistake, that i ruin other people lives. well i dont know, if i should continue, and and my friends upset, or not, and stay here. I DONT KNOW?! its just really hard to stop though, cuz im so addicted to it. EHH` . what should i do ? thanks . if you wanna i.m. me on AIM ; BlinkBabex33 .. or you can email me ; BlinkBabex33@comcast.net
Hello dear. I don't think youre a "psycho freak" or anything like that, because I went through the same exact thing. Although my mom did find out about my cutting and sent me to therapy. I honestly do not regret anything I did. After I stopped cutting I realized that if I didn't cut, then everything would've probably built up and I might've killed myself. So, in my opinion, cutting saved my life.
Cutting isn't the easiest thing to quit. Although it's best if you do quit, for obvious reasons. You said you were addicted. I was too. I quit during the summer, and I still get urges.
I know you don't want to hear this, but I think you need to talk to someone. Whether it be your parent, or a good friend, or you could even go to therapy and get help by yourself.
If you don't want to talk to someone like that, you can always IM me, and I'll listen. Or you don't have to. My screenname is persephone485.

Good Luck hun

Q: hey wuts up people my friend like this grl in my high school. He saiz shes nice and stuff like that but i never see him hanging out with her and i happen to be friends with her and she barely knows who he is. I think he just likes her because she is like the leader of the cheerleading squad or wutever its called. Someone give me a way to tell this kid hes retarded and he only like sher cuz shes a cheerlead in a *nice* way
how do you know thats the only reason? did he SAY that was the reason? hmm...how about you find that out before making assumptions and losing your friend over something like that.

Q: well i have this friend lets call him fred well fred and i have known eachother for hmm 6 years or so and hes 2 years older than me so hes 15 and a sophmore and im 13 in 8th grade anyways fred used to hate me but now he wants to get with me there are two problems..

1) he has told me himself he cant keep a girl for longer than 3 days, but those 3 days cud be the best 3 days of my life since i've liked him for 6 years

2) he told me he does weed now im not sure if he still does but he told me he quit and im not sure if i shud believe him

3) i smoke and he's okay with that but i dont want to get him addicted by bein w. me

4) we live 30 mins away from eachother but im movin to his town this summer so when im a freshman he'll be a junior...

can anyone help me? i rate high tnxs
and what is the problem?

i really dont see any, other than the guy cant keep a girl for more than three days. thats ridiculous.

Q: im going out with this guy since yesterday who i've never talked to. we're in the same health class. tomorrow his friend told me to talk to him. im really nervous because i dont know what to say at all. any ideas? also, how should i make it look like im not as nervous as i really am? thanx!
ok...youre going out with the guy, but you have never talked to him?? um...thats pretty effed up. why dont you try talking before going out?

Q: Ok, I'm getting contacts really soon. The problem is, I have this little fear of things going in my eye. I have practiced so many times trying to put them in, but I always subconciously close my eye and I can never get them in all the way. What am I supposed to do to get over this? I really want to wear these contacts, but I'm so scared putting them in!
scream. just go "ahhhh!!!" and shove that contact in

Q: how do you get a guy to bug off? i mean, he stares at me touches me, and sings to me. EEWW!!! and if it isnt bad enough, there is this other guy, and he keeps telling me that he loves me. ew to him to! He says hes just kidding, but he does it like everyday. its disgusting!!
"fuck off" does me pretty well...

or you could scream "rape" and get the dumbass arrested...either one should work

Q: ok... here's the thing... there'z theze three guyz that flirt wit me [[ not to sound conceided ]] that aren't all that perfect but they're all pretti cute ya know? aniwai... everityme i start flirting wit one of em...a different one comez up expectin a lil attention too! i don't think that ani of them know each other, so i can't hang out with all of them at da same tyme! they're all realli cool to talk to but when i talk to one of em another one getz jealouz! what should i do???
why are you switching all of the y's and i's??? that makes it super confusing!

ow my eyes burn from trying to read that.

from what i could read...just hang out with the one you like the most? if you dont like any of them, and find them all repulsive...what the hell are you doing flirting with them anyways?

Q: What are some good screenname Ideas?

-I love Avril Lavigne
-I LOVE LOVE LOVE orca whales
-I skateboard
-I'm a punk, tomboy type

Thanks, I rate really well
how about...

Iam notreally punkbecause i loveAvril andorcas

ok...so it might be too long. you get the point though dont you?

think of your own screen names

Q: One day me and my friends were hangin out and this gurl came up to me and smiled. WEll that day she hung out with us. The next day at lunch she sat by me and we talked. the next few weeks we got closer. And we started to kiss and go out. Well one of my friends likes her and i dont want to hurt him. To make matters worse i over heard him and her talking and she really seemed to like him.

Im confused should i bring my game up and not be friends or should i let him have her and still be friends. I dont want to give her up
well, you dont really know for sure that she likes him just because she "seemed" to like him. maybe shes just the flirtacious type? or maybe theyre really good friends already. cause i have a guy best friend and people always think we like each other or are dating.

and its really frustrating, cause then guys that i like dont think i like them, but i really do.

maybe thats just the case with her? i think you should talk to the girl about it.

Q: My friend who is a guy (tom) told me that my boyfriend (jon) had been in touch with one of jon's ex's. He said they'd been sending each other dirty texts and that jon had said if his ex didn't live so far away he'd break up with me and go out with her. I asked jon about it but he said Tom was lying. I want to believe him but why would Tom lie to me? Tom keeps trying to get me to break up with jon but he's one of his best friends, what should I do?
i think Tom is jealous and likes you. hes trying to break you and jon up....but thats just what i think. talk to tom about it

Q: What does 143 mean ? im a little slow.
it means i hate you

i-one letter
hate- four letters
you- three letters

Q: okay there is this girl at my skool and she is freak but today she made fun of my friend and i and said we were "the bad altos"!! she can't sing for her life!! What can we do to get back at her??

um...not to be mean, but YOU are the one who seems like a freak for letting something like that get to you.

get over it.

Q: We Just Moved Into A New House And We Bought It. So My Mom Said I Can Paint And Decorate My Room However I want. I Dont Know What I Should Paint It Though. My Favorite Colors Are Pink And Purple. And I Love The Playboy bunny. Does Anyone Know Where I Could Get Playboy bunny stuff? Or Pink Stuff For Your Room? Thanks.
you should....

Stop Capitalizing All Of The Words...and then make your room black. its the best way to go. trust me ;)

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lostandconfused
ask me a question! you know you want to! so DO IT! it will be fun...please, i beg of you, ask me questions

i give advice. whether it be good advice, or advice that you really shouldnt take, is up to you to decide.

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Member Since:
August 15, 2004

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Last Update:
July 29, 2005

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