here to help=]
Member Since: February 2, 2009
Answers: 24
Last Update: April 22, 2011
Visitors: 2086
|
| |
|
i've been having this thing for a while, the problem is i don't feel as part of this world. everything i do goes wrong or can i put this way i'm just a failure, i try to seek help but people donot believe and i think the only way that can end this problem is to commit sucuide.i'm realy in need of this easy ways to commit suicuide. (link)
|
Ok, let me put it this way
your alive, and healthy. There is people out there that are suffering and slowly dying, but put up with it because they want to live their life out. You never know what is going to happen if you don't live your life out. something momental could happen in a day, a month, or in a couple years. you dont know the future, so why must you stop it from happening?
if the depression is eating at you that bad, ending your life will not silence it. Instead, the ending of your life may drive more people to follow your example, especially people you love. seriously, feeding your crap, but really they are right.
please just take the time to read this. it is so so helpful, and its from someone who has been in pain and knows pain.
"If you are feeling suicidal now, please stop long enough to read this. It will only take about five minutes. I do not want to talk you out of your bad feelings. I am not a therapist or other mental health professional - only someone who knows what it is like to be in pain.
I don't know who you are, or why you are reading this page. I only know that for the moment, you're reading it, and that is good. I can assume that you are here because you are troubled and considering ending your life. If it were possible, I would prefer to be there with you at this moment, to sit with you and talk, face to face and heart to heart. But since that is not possible, we will have to make do with this.
I have known a lot of people who have wanted to kill themselves, so I have some small idea of what you might be feeling. I know that you might not be up to reading a long book, so I am going to keep this short. While we are together here for the next five minutes, I have five simple, practical things I would like to share with you. I won't argue with you about whether you should kill yourself. But I assume that if you are thinking about it, you feel pretty bad.
Well, you're still reading, and that is very good. I'd like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that you're at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are still a little bit unsure. It means that even while you want to die, at the same time some part of you still wants to live. So let's hang on to that, and keep going for a few more minutes.
Start by considering this statement:
Suicide is not chosen; it happens
when pain exceeds
resources for coping with pain.â€
That's all it's about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn't even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.
Don't accept it if someone tells you, that's not enough to be suicidal about. There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.
When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.
You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.
Now I want to tell you five things to think about.
1 You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.
2 Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, I will wait 24 hours before I do anything. Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn't mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if it's just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.
3 People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.
4 Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.
But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what's going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:
Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans
Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
Call a psychotherapist
Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen
But don't give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.
5 Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.
Well, it's been a few minutes and you're still with me. I am really glad.
Since you have made it this far, you deserve a reward. I think you should reward yourself by giving yourself a gift. The gift you will give yourself is a coping resource. Remember, back up near the top of the page, I said that the idea is to make sure you have more coping resources than you have pain. So let's give you another coping resource, or two, or ten...! until they outnumber your sources of pain.
Now, while this page may have given you some small relief, the best coping resource we can give you is another human being to talk with. If you find someone who wants to listen, and tell them how you are feeling and how you got to this point, you will have increased your coping resources by one. Hopefully the first person you choose won't be the last. There are a lot of people out there who really want to hear from you. It's time to start looking around for one of them.
Now: I'd like you to call someone."
you have no clue what will come! dont stop the future from happening. please, please think about this, because after you commit suicide there is no going back!
if you need someone to talk to im here. even tho you dont know me id be glad to listen. sometimes it might be better to talk to someone you don't know. but i promise you, you can make it through this, you are important and the world would be a much worse place without you in it.
|
|
what are those little brown dots on your nose, their not blackheads or anything, so what are they? im a teen by the way. (link)
| |
they are your pores, some people have more noticeable ones than others, certain makeups will help make them less noticeable if that is what your looking for!
|
|
All my friends say that I'm beautiful (I just recently dyed my hair red) and that I don't need to date. But every time my friends start talking about awesome it was to hang out with their Boyfriends and their plans for the weekend with their BF, I feel left out. I am the only one of my friends that is single. Is there a way to feel less like an outcast??? I'm only 13... (link)
| |
oh honey your fine! believe me, every girl goes through this. it doesnt matter that all your friends have boyfriends and you dont, sure it feels lonely but it takes time and maturity to find the right person. i promise that none of your friend's realationships will work out for very long at this age. while it may seem like its the end of the world, you will realize as you grow older that its really not and that spending time with your friends while your young is better than having a boyfriend. most girls who have boyfriends at young ages end up alienating their friends, and by the time that they and their boyfriends break up, they have lost all their friends and are left with no one. hanging out with friends is so much more important in the long run, believe me, and when youre ready the right guy will come along! plus a lot of girls havent dated anyone or have never even kissed a boy before they get to highschool. it just may seem like EVERYONE has because everyone is embarrassed to admit it when they havent had that much experience. just keep your head held high, your beautiful and when you get a older youll find the right guy who will love you.
|
|
I'm 16/f, he's 17/m (obviously...). He's from a town about 20 mins away in a different state. Let's call him Jake. One of my good friends Carrie has known Jake since they were in diapers, and she brought him to one of our dances last year (just as friends). He had a gf at the time, and I didn't really think much of him then. Four months ago, she had him and his friend Eric go to her birthday party, which I also attended. He acted much more like himself this time around, and I thought he just seemed like a really fun guy. (I believe he was single by this time, and Carrie ended up going out with Eric.) About a month later, she had another party, which I went to, and so did Jake and Eric. After the party, I developed a bit of a thing for him. He was just soooo so funny and really sweet and unlike anyone I'd ever met. Eric plays football, so Carrie asked me about a month after the party if I would like to go to one of his games with her. Of course, I said yes. So I went, and we had to pick up Jake on the way. After the game, I was basically sold. I fell for him COMPLETELY. I gave him my number that night (I amazed even myself with that) and he gave me his. He texted me maybe once or twice. A week later, I went to the next game, and he was there. We hung out at Carrie's house for a little while after, and I fell for him even harder. Then we started texting every day. He was always the one to text me first, and he would say the nicest things to me. A week or two went by and he told me that he liked me, and I told him that I liked him too. He said he wanted to get to know me better, which I completely understand. It's been a month since i've seen him, and we still text every day. He's an absolute sweetheart to me :) Next week, he's coming to my school's dance as my date (matching colors and all). I'm really, really nervous cause it's my first real date with a guy. Things seem to be going pretty well, right? Well there are a few problems. One, his ex. He broke up with her, and things did NOT end very well. I just have an odd feeling he still has a bit of a thing for her. Two, other girls. Girls FLOCK to him. He's the kind of guy that is sweet to everyone and always puts other people before himself. Some things he says to other girls make me jealous, and I'm really afraid he's going to end up giving me the slip and asking out one of these other girls. I don't really know what I'm asking, but any input whatsoever would be greatly appreciated. And if you want any more info, just let me know :) I just don't exactly know how to feel right now. I don't want to get my hopes up really high just to have them shot down. (link)
|
Heyy...
i understand your insecurities because he sounds like an amazing guy. But just remember that YOU are the one hes going on a date with not other girls. YOU are the one he texts everyday. And he's even admitted to liking you, you have nothing to worry about. Girls may flock to him, but your the one he shows attention to and likes. Concerning his ex,I wouldn't mention it or bring it up at all, because he broke up with his ex for a reason, and he is obviously ready to move on. Him liking you is proof of that! So don't sweat it. Just be yourself, and don't be too clingy-don't show him that your jealous he talks to other girls or anything. Instead, make him realize that your the only girl he wants. Don't worry about his past-focus on building a future in which you could probably become exclusive and date:) Best wishes, hope your dance goes great!
|
|
Well im 15 years old, n wear a 32 A size. Im not happy with my bra size at all. My boos are too small compared to my friend's everybody else at my age have much more than what i have. && im not happy at all w. that. i really need advice on how can i make them grow there has to be a way. i wear push up bras that make my boobs look alot bigger & makes ppl think i have really nice tits wen i really dont. the problem come when i go 2 the beach/pool :( . REAllY NEEd AdViCE. ThANk YOU ;) (link)
|
dont worry really a lot of girls go through this including myself! my boobs didnt start growing till i was 17. the trick when swimming is to avoid string bikinis they make your boobs look a lot smaller. wear halter tops bathing suits believe me they do wonders. ive found pacsun halter top bathing suits are really flattering to small boobs and make them look a lot bigger than they are. also places like victoria's secret having bathing suits that are like bras with wiring and actually push your boobs up. but dont sweat it, you still have a lot of time for them to grow, some of us are just late bloomers:)
hope this helps!
|
18F.
i'm probably one of the pickiest girls when it comes to guy but about a month ago i met this guy ..and i'm really starting to fall for him. i'm such a jealous person and i do have trust problem and so i just feel like he is talking to other girls besides me, which i mean there isn't anything wrong with that since we're not official, and i don't want to be a nagging girl, who knows he might not even be talking to any girls besides me, i'm just always worried.
i don't want to lose him because it's been about 2yrs since i've even found anyone i liked. we were texting last night and somehow got on the topic of me and how alot of creepers tend to go for me and like me and he was like "oh so does that mean i'm a creeper?.." and i was like no definitely not don't worry. does that mean he admitted that he liked me? i didn't really know what he meant by that.
he use to always text me first, now i feel like i'm always the one texting him first. he always seems happy to talk to me. he hasn't once tried doing anything sexual with me, which i like. i don't know what i should do next? just keep hanging out with him, and keep doing what i'm doing?? i wan't him to myself, such a selfish girl haha :)
(link)
|
Hey...
he definately likes you. you basically just said that he admitted to being into you. However, if you have a feeling that he talks to other girls you may be right. i have found that most flirty guys with an attractive personality talk to multiple girls. what you have to do is make yourself stand out. hang out with him a lot and try to grow closer to him. if he is talking to other girls its very likely he will drop them for you if he develops strong feelings for you. just keep hanging out with him and doing what your doing. and your also right-dont be naggy and bug him about talking to other girls because that will push him away. by giving him space, i believe he will ultimately come back you. one thing that guys especially dont like is clingy girls. so just continue what you've been doing because your on the right track, and sooner or later something good will happen with thw two of you:)
hope this helps!
|
Hello..
Hello I've been in a relationship with my boy friend for a long time now. He means everything to me. (link)
|
Hey..
I think you just need to talk with him. Tell him how much you care about him and asure him that your not going anywhere. You see, he's scared because all the women in his life have abandoned him at some point, and he probably fears that you are the same. Tell him you're not like that, and even more importantly, show him you're not like that. By being with him and showing him your love and affection you will build trust, and it seems like that is what he is needs and is what he is most sceptical about.
hope this helps!
|
17/F (sorry this will be long)
Okay so i have a problem. I am basically in love with my best guy friend. He knows it bc i have told him before. I've liked him for bout a year now and i cant get over him. Cant explain how much i like him. The thing is when i told him he said it was obvious n i said well i dont want to make things weird n he said its never weird btw us dont worry. His friend and also my good friend told me hes not gonna tell me how he feels bc hes not that kind of a guy. Ok so one of his friends really really likes me n we r jus bein friends right now bc i cant get myself to like anyone else, its impossible. The amount that i like this kid is overwhelming. Me n the guy i like hang out allll the time and just last night i guess he was hitting on my friend. So i asked her n she said yeah he was but he was also drunk. Well today im texting him n hes like yeah shes really pretty but i dont think she would ever wanna hook up. N the truth is she wouldnt bc wi all my friends hes off limits bc they know how much he means to me. She doesnt like him like that anyways. I mean me n him talk bout how we feel bout other ppl all the time but for some reason this is killing me. Im to the point where i almost started crying. Pathetic right, i know. I absolutely hate how much i like him bc i have other guys that like me n they r good guys! I jus really really like him n need help! I have no where else to turn! please help me out. Nothin can hurt me anymore so dont hold back. Man i jus like him so much. Hes all i ever think about. Jeez please help me! (link)
|
i think its crucial for you to find out find out how HE feels. and not through anyone else, you have to ask him yourself and get him to open up. because if he doesnt have feelings for you, then you are spending all this time liking him when you could be going out with other guys that are genuinely interested in you. however, it seems to me like he has feelings for you, and doesnt know how to act on them. or maybe he hasnt realized that he likes you. why else would he want to hang out with you all the time? because he likes spending time with you, and just might have feelings for you that he doesnt want to face. maybe hes scared, scared of commitment, scared of opening up, or scared of how what will happen to your friendship if things go badly. but maybe, maybe he wont admit that he likes you because of his friend that you talked about that likes you alot. just like your friend would never go out with this guy because she knows how much he means to you, maybe he wont admit he has feelings for you because of his friend that really likes you. Its just like the situation with your friend knowing hes out of bounds because you like him only flipped. but its absolutely important that you find out how he feels about you. and if he doesnt realize he has feelings for you, and you move on to the other guy thats his friend he might end up realizing he does like you, and things could get a little nasty. but whatever you do, keep the feelings of the other guy that really really likes you in he back of your mind, because you could easily hurt him.
good luckkk! :)
|
so when i talk to this guy i like over text..the conversation usually ends before i want it too. cause i run out of things to say.
so what are some way's that i can keep the conversation going without him realizing that i'm trying?? (link)
|
i have that problem sometimes. and heres thing i have done in the past-
-randomly thrown in a pick up line into the conversation. like one of those cheezy ones out of the blue is really funny.
like did you eat lucky charms this morning?
cuz your magically delicious.
hah i know its kinda random...but it actually works!
other things to do is talk about something that happened recently. like sports, things in your community, or things going on around you.
something else you can do is play kinda a little game. he asks you any question and you have to give an honest answer, and you ask him any question and he has to. it really helps you find out stuff about the other person, including their feelings about you and what they like about you and about girls in general.
sometimes when your in that situation where you have no clue what to talk about, google can be your best friend!
hope this helps![=
|
|
ok, if you have ever read any other of my questions, you would know the story. I am 15/f. My best friend keeps trying to set me up with guys from he family. I have a crush on her brother and she knows it, but i dont think i will ever find out if he feels the same. (he doesnt know how i feel). My best friends uncle and cousin have already had crushes on me. I will tell u the story of both. My best friends uncle is still in high school, a senior, but he is crazy (literally) he beat his parents then went to jail. after that neither me or my bff spoke or got near him again, but he still likes me. (unfortunately). second, her cousin is my age, almost. he is five months youger than me. i started to fall for him later on too (he was a sweet talker) but since i never told him he went for one of my friends, so im glad i didnt like him a hole lot that it would have hurt me(hes one of those guys that only dates you for three months then breaks up with you, so i said no when he asked me out). (still kind of stung though). Now, getting down to my question, her other cousin is sixteen and he is really cute (i still like her brother though). He is quiet in school and barely messes with any girls, huh, some of the girls havent even heard his voice before (which is unusual because i go to a very small school). each time i go over to her house he always makes fun of me or picks at me in some way, Like one day we were playing outside and he was picking on me. well, i got tired of it and threw a football at his head (i hit it of coarse) and all of a sudden he soaks me with the water hose while im in my white t-shirt. well, my bffs mom made him get me a towel and do u know what he brang me???? a friggin washcloth!!! and then he LAUGHS about it! okay, i do have to admit, it was pretty funny, but still! and he always picks about how much i eat (i dont hold back just because some cute guy is there watching). I am fairly skinny by the way, its not like im fat or anything. so he always has to mess with me in some way but he barely messes with other girls. i even asked my friend if i offended him when i first met him to make him pick on me so much and she said that he just likes to pick on me. so i just wanted to know, does he pick on me because he likes me or because its just fun to do? cause honestly i have no idea. (link)
|
often times guys pick on girls when they like them, and to me it sounds like thats what this guy is doing. Teasing girls is common when guys have crushes on them. i dont really know why- i guess to make girls may more attention to them, or hide their true feelings? or maybe its there way of saying they do have feelings on you. but whatever the reason may be guys pick on girls because they like them.
it sounds like this is definately the case, because you said he doesn't do that to other girls.
yeah but it sounds like he definately likes you, and goodluck! and if you have feelings for her bro maybe you might want to have your friend ask him what he thinks about you, leaving out the fact that you like him. you know, like a friendly "hey you guys would look cute together!" or something along those lines haha. it might be best for you to know how he feels, so that you can know whether to move on to this cousin or not.
hope this helps!=]
|
16f
I'm really sorry about the length, but I'm very detailed and it's hard for me not to be but I need help!
A bit over 3 weeks ago (and about a week before spring break) I admitted to my guy friend from school (we'll call him Nathan) that I liked him in sortof an unorthodox way (it was through text during chem class while he was sitting behind me, it was stupid but we;ve gotten past that). Nathan didn't respond and we didn't talk for a couple days but we started talking 2 or three days before break and the only thing i found out what that I pretty much scared the shit out of him, but that was the last time we spoke about it. A week ago we got back from break. The awkwardness is still sortof there but most of it has dissolved. Nathan's still nice to me and we've been joking around and being good friends more and more like we used to. But I was still upset that I never got a direct answer, and I wasn't happy with the idea of it never being brought up again. So I asked my friend (we'll call her Randi), who's also in our chem class and also his friend (they hang out a lot and stuff, he has several friends who are girls) to sortof bring up that she knew about what I did (because he didn't tell anyone, don't ask how i know i just do) and try to get his reaction about it and put the idea in his head. I told her not to tell him i asked, and he's pretty oblivious so he never would've figured it out on his own haha. So today Randi told me that she tried to make a conversation of it, but she really couldn’t because he’s not the type to talk about how he feels and what he’s thinking, and he’s not really easy to read either. (This is most likely why he didn’t respond when I told him)
Randi: So I know about how Mel (me) told you about how she likes you
Nathan: Yeah... she texted me about it that day
Randi: So did you text her back... (she knew the story, but he didn't know that she knew, that was the plan)
Nathan: No..
Randi: Well are you ever gonna say something/answer her? (I forgot which she said)
Nathan: ...I don't know
Randi: Well can you give me something and work with me here?
Nathan: ....I don't know
And as far as I know that's where the convo stopped. We were planning for her to say something like "I think you two would look good together", but obviously she couldn't get the convo to continue like we had planned. Anyway after she told me I was like "I don’t know what I wanna do now I mean i don't wanna be pushy you know?". And she was like "we should definitely wait a couple days." and i was like "yeah i want to do this in small doses". And i really do, I don't want to be pushy with him at all. So on my own I was thinking that on Friday i'm gonna have gym alone with Nathan since our other friend (we'll call her Tara) won't be there that day, so we'll sortof see what happens in a situation where were alone, which we haven't really had since i told him. And even though me and Nathan still have talked a lot i feel a bit disincluded from conversations recently when him and Tara talk. Another thing I kindof found interesting was that today he put So my two questions are: 1. I'm glad that he pretty much “I don’t know'ed” the situation instead of just saying that he doesn't feel the same way. I feel like that could mean something, what should I think of their conversation? Do i possibly have a chance? This never happens to me so i don't know this stuff very well. 2. What should my next step be? I definitely don't want to be too pushy, and I definitely want to do this in small doses. Like should I get her to get him to invite me somewhere when they hang out? (he has a car and knows where I live what we havent hung out yet, we're good friends but not as close as I wish we were aha) or should I get her to sortof bring it up again over the weekend or next week? I'm not quite sure I'm ready to talk to him about it myself but any suggestions would be good on what to do next.
*Please don't say things like "you shouldn't have told him you liked him so forwardly" or "give him time, he's probably just taken off guard. I already know these things, and that's not what I want to know.
Also another thing I kindof found interesting was in chem today (he sits behind me) he put his leg on this metal bar on the side of my chair, and it comes pretty close to me when he does that. This is the first time he's done this since I told him. Before I told him, he did this pretty much everyday, and I know he stopped because things were awkward. But doesn't it seem a little convenient that he started doing this the day after randi brought me up with him? I don’t know but anyway please help with my two questions! Once again I apologize for the length!
(link)
|
It sounds like he is kind of unsure how he feels....though if he did like you i would think that he would answer you back but you did say that he is not very open with his emotions.
the best thing, i think you could do is act like you did before you told him. become "just friends" again and ask him to hang out maybe with a group. he already knows that you like him, and letting the idea hang there might have an effect. let him think about it. what ever you do don't have any of your friends talk to him about it again and don't bring it up. You will seem clingy then, and this is a complete turnoff to guys. He might like you better, and things might be less awkward if you just hung out as friends. play hard to get almost. act uninterested, luckily it will grab his attention. the main thing is not to act clingy. let him think that you don't like him anymore. Im sure he will end up thinking about you alot and why you have changed your mind. though you like him a lot, acting like you don't like him "like that" may just do the trick.
hope this helps!=]
|
Ok so my dad makes my life a living hell and i dont know what to do anymore. He makes me just want to leave(die) and never come back. i just want to get away from the pain. i want to commit suicide but im afraid. Can you help me?? What should i do about these thoughts and attempts??
HelP!!! (link)
|
Ok, let me put it this way
your alive, and healthy. There is people out there that are suffering and slowly dying, but put up with it because they want to live their life out. You never know what is going to happen if you don't live your life out.
if the depression is eating at you that bad, ending your life will not silence it. Instead, the ending of your life may drive more people to follow your example, especially people you love. seriously, i know people say dont give up dont give up and you think they are just feeding your crap, but really they are right.
please just take the time to read this passage that i have found.:
"If you are feeling suicidal now, please stop long enough to read this. It will only take about five minutes. I do not want to talk you out of your bad feelings. I am not a therapist or other mental health professional - only someone who knows what it is like to be in pain.
I don’t know who you are, or why you are reading this page. I only know that for the moment, you’re reading it, and that is good. I can assume that you are here because you are troubled and considering ending your life. If it were possible, I would prefer to be there with you at this moment, to sit with you and talk, face to face and heart to heart. But since that is not possible, we will have to make do with this.
I have known a lot of people who have wanted to kill themselves, so I have some small idea of what you might be feeling. I know that you might not be up to reading a long book, so I am going to keep this short. While we are together here for the next five minutes, I have five simple, practical things I would like to share with you. I won’t argue with you about whether you should kill yourself. But I assume that if you are thinking about it, you feel pretty bad.
Well, you’re still reading, and that’s very good. I’d like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that you’re at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are still a little bit unsure. It means that even while you want to die, at the same time some part of you still wants to live. So let’s hang on to that, and keep going for a few more minutes.
Start by considering this statement:
“Suicide is not chosen; it happens
when pain exceeds
resources for coping with pain.”
That’s all it’s about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn’t even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.
Don’t accept it if someone tells you, “that’s not enough to be suicidal about.” There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.
When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.
You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.
Now I want to tell you five things to think about.
1 You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.
2 Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, “I will wait 24 hours before I do anything.” Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn’t mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if it’s just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.
3 People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.
4 Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.
But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what’s going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:
Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans
Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
Call a psychotherapist
Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen
But don’t give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.
5 Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.
Well, it’s been a few minutes and you’re still with me. I’m really glad.
Since you have made it this far, you deserve a reward. I think you should reward yourself by giving yourself a gift. The gift you will give yourself is a coping resource. Remember, back up near the top of the page, I said that the idea is to make sure you have more coping resources than you have pain. So let’s give you another coping resource, or two, or ten...! until they outnumber your sources of pain.
Now, while this page may have given you some small relief, the best coping resource we can give you is another human being to talk with. If you find someone who wants to listen, and tell them how you are feeling and how you got to this point, you will have increased your coping resources by one. Hopefully the first person you choose won’t be the last. There are a lot of people out there who really want to hear from you. It’s time to start looking around for one of them.
Now: I’d like you to call someone."
you have no clue what will come! dont stop the future from happening. please, please this about this, because after you commit suicide there is no going back!
|
well, iwant a new screen name.
im torii, im preppy i loooveee
ripped jeans r&b and shiiit.
and i curse all the time lmfao
kwell, leave some ideas for me ;] (link)
|
damnnnitstorix3
XoToRiXox3
heyz its torx33
imlovintorix3
x3toriixo
x3preppyshizXo
2preppy4ux3
rocksrippedjeans
r&bsweety
|
|
Hey everyone. My name is Rachel, and I am fourteen, fifteen in June. I need help. Well, I have a HUGE crush on a guy at school. He's incredibly handsome, and hilarious. (My two need-haves, when it comes to guys.) But, here’s the problem. I'm a freshman he's a junior. He's 17 in May. It's not a problem for me, and he has a few Ex's in my grade, so it's not a problem for him either. But my mom is a whole other story. Well, I had transferred to my school at the beginning of the school year, and my mom had casually asked if I had any boys on the brain. I told her about... Well let's call him "T", and she said, "Well, you know he's too old for you, right?" I had no reply to that. That made me a little mad. I mean technically there's only a year in between us. ALSO, my mom and dad are married, and my mom is 42, my dad 48. Don't you think that's kind of hypocritical? I mean, I'm not being disrespectful, or I don't mean to be anyway, but I don't think that's very fair. If you ask me, I don't think T and I have that big of an age difference. But, if mommy says, Rachel does. If she tells me I can't date him, I won't, no questions asked. But if I convinced her otherwise and she said I could, I'd be content in doing so. So, lying and sneaking around is absolutely out of the question. But, I need a few tips on how to convince her that the difference isn't that large. Any ideas? Or even if you think the difference is big, give your opinion please! I will not judge or anything. Any advice will be accepted. Thanks~! J (link)
|
that isnt a big age difference at all like i know a ton of freshman that date juniors. what you should do though, is introduce him to your mom, and show her what a nice guy he is. hopefully your mom will like him just as much as you do. you have to prove her that he will be resposible and respect you and that he's a nice guy. just telling her probably wont work; invite him over one day or something and introduce him to your mom. if she sees that he is a good guy and will be good for you, then the age difference probably wont matter so much
hope this helps!=]
|
heeyy..
am a 16 year old female.. nd i already got too tired from life.. i wanna gt away from it.. its all that i want right now..
i just wanna know the best way to do it..
and please answer me as soon as possible.. cuz i wanna do it by next week max..
thnxx all xoxox (link)
|
Ok, let me put it this way
your alive, and healthy. There is people out there that are suffering and slowly dying, but put up with it because they want to live their life out. You never know what is going to happen if you don't live your life out.
if the depression is eating at you that bad, ending your life will not silence it. Instead, the ending of your life may drive more people to follow your example, especially people you love. seriously, i know people say dont give up dont give up and you think they are just feeding your crap, but really they are right.
and you may say there is no one left who loves you, or that you love but really there IS SOMEONE OUT THERE THAT DOES.
please just take the time to read this passage that i have found.:
"If you are feeling suicidal now, please stop long enough to read this. It will only take about five minutes. I do not want to talk you out of your bad feelings. I am not a therapist or other mental health professional - only someone who knows what it is like to be in pain.
I don’t know who you are, or why you are reading this page. I only know that for the moment, you’re reading it, and that is good. I can assume that you are here because you are troubled and considering ending your life. If it were possible, I would prefer to be there with you at this moment, to sit with you and talk, face to face and heart to heart. But since that is not possible, we will have to make do with this.
I have known a lot of people who have wanted to kill themselves, so I have some small idea of what you might be feeling. I know that you might not be up to reading a long book, so I am going to keep this short. While we are together here for the next five minutes, I have five simple, practical things I would like to share with you. I won’t argue with you about whether you should kill yourself. But I assume that if you are thinking about it, you feel pretty bad.
Well, you’re still reading, and that’s very good. I’d like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that you’re at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are still a little bit unsure. It means that even while you want to die, at the same time some part of you still wants to live. So let’s hang on to that, and keep going for a few more minutes.
Start by considering this statement:
“Suicide is not chosen; it happens
when pain exceeds
resources for coping with pain.”
That’s all it’s about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn’t even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.
Don’t accept it if someone tells you, “that’s not enough to be suicidal about.” There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.
When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.
You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.
Now I want to tell you five things to think about.
1 You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.
2 Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, “I will wait 24 hours before I do anything.” Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn’t mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if it’s just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.
3 People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.
4 Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.
But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what’s going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:
Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans
Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
Call a psychotherapist
Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen
But don’t give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.
5 Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.
Well, it’s been a few minutes and you’re still with me. I’m really glad.
Since you have made it this far, you deserve a reward. I think you should reward yourself by giving yourself a gift. The gift you will give yourself is a coping resource. Remember, back up near the top of the page, I said that the idea is to make sure you have more coping resources than you have pain. So let’s give you another coping resource, or two, or ten...! until they outnumber your sources of pain.
Now, while this page may have given you some small relief, the best coping resource we can give you is another human being to talk with. If you find someone who wants to listen, and tell them how you are feeling and how you got to this point, you will have increased your coping resources by one. Hopefully the first person you choose won’t be the last. There are a lot of people out there who really want to hear from you. It’s time to start looking around for one of them.
Now: I’d like you to call someone."
you are so young, you've yet to go to college, or even finish highschool. you have no clue what will come! dont stop the future from happening. please, please this about this, because after you commit suicide there is no going back.
|
Okay. Here is the deal.
I am currently a sophomore. Last year I took chemistry, this year I am taking biology.
Next year and the year after that I have to choose between AP Bio, AP Environmental Science, AP Physics, Environmental Science and Physics. I can take two of them. I have not taken a physics class because we tok physics in 8th grade and that doesn't count and apparently you need physics for colleges and I don't know what to do...
WHICH ONES SHOULD I TAKE? I want to take AP Bio next year but I don't know what to do after that or should I even take AP Bio? I feel like the transition will be better
I want to be an orthodontist or dentist!! =D (link)
|
a good idea would be to take regular physics next year (or AP if you want to) because colleges want DEFINATELY want to see that you have taken three years of different sciences (bio, chem, and physics are the best ones to take)
But junior year usually has the most workload considering other AP classes (like english, history etc.), so don't super load up your schedule or you will be stressed to no end. Being in highschool myself i know how crazy that can be. If you take phyics next year, then you could take AP Bio your senior year because usually senior year is more relaxed. Or maybe try to find out if your school offers summer courses. Like at my school we can take physics over the summer and get it over with so that we can take AP chem and AP bio for junior or senior years.
However, depending on the number of other difficult classes you are taking, i think that Bio and Physics are the best options for you. Whether you take AP Phyics or not depends on if you have a super jammed schedule or not!
really hope this helps. good luck with your denistry career.
|
|
How does popcorn get made in the bag when u put it in the microwave?Isnt it a big block of butter before you put it in the microwave?Wouldnt the butter melt and not make popcorn? (link)
| |
No actually there is little corn kernals in the bag that pop when heated. The butter is just on top of the kernals lol.
|
Mkay..
Well i dont know if this is in the right catagory but i need help.!
Mkay..
my hair has been greesy alot..
like i would wait a week to wash it and the next two days its greesy again..
like i take a shower everynight like wash my body but i heard that the longer you wait the longer it will not get greesy!
like my sister and my moms hair is just normal i never see theirs greesy but its really starting to get on my nerves..
please help me!
(: (link)
|
waiting to wash your hair has an opposite effect!
and also, it may have to do with the shampoo/conditioner you are using and how much of it you are using.
try not using conditioner and see if that works. Or if you must use it, you very little because i have found conditioner to make hair really greasy especially if it hasn't all been washed out!
Maybe try using a different shampoo.
and also do you blow dry your hair? because often that makes it took less greasy.
If it isn't the shampoo or conditioner, then try taking a shower in the morning. I have found that when i take a shower in the morning my hair looks SO much better than if i take a shower the night before. This is because when you sleep on your hair and toss and turn it gets greasy. And also do you put products in your hair after you take a shower like moose or shiner? Because that oftentimes can make your hair greasy.
Hope this helps!! =]
|
|
On average, how much weight do u lose in a week with doing track every weekday for 2 hours? (link)
| |
it depends what kind of event you are doing and how hard you are working out, but you will most likely lose a pound a week from doing track
|
Okay we're supposed to summarize the first quarter of our book and then it says "Theme: in the first quarter of the novel the author is trying to say that:" and "Theme shown through setting:"
I don't know HOW to come up with a theme from my summarization but i did summarize so if you could just read through this and help me somehow, I'd really appreciate this:
Christopher John Francis Boone, an autistic 15 year old boy who lives in Swindon, Wiltshire, comes across his neighbour’s dead poodle (Wellington) with a garden fork sticking out of his body in his neighbour’s front yard. Mrs. Shears, his neighbour, comes across him holding Wellington and believes that he killed him. She calls the police and Christopher is taken to the police station after hitting a police officer (he does not like to be touched) and his dad (Ed Boone) bails him out. Ed runs a business and does heating maintenance and boiler repair. Christopher tries to solve the mystery of who killed the black poodle to clear his name. Siobhan, his teacher and friend, gives him the idea of recording his adventures in a book; therefore he is the narrator of the story. As the story progresses, Christopher shares that his mother, Judy Boone, died two years ago. He also mentions interesting things to know such as prime numbers, stars, a simile, metaphors, slander, spazzer, and Red Herring between the storyline. The reader learns that he is gifted at math, detests the colours yellow and brown, likes red, has a dream of becoming an astronaut, and relates well to animals, especially to his pet rat Toby. Despite his father’s wishes, Christopher uses logic to start off his investigation by going around his neighbourhood and asking questions (which is very hard for him to do). His efforts seem useless until he arrives at the home of Mrs. Alexander, who gives him a clue by mentioning Mr. Shears, Mrs. Shears’ ex-husband.
Thanks! You don't have to give me a direct them because that would just be unmorally cheating but it would be very nice to explain it to me or to give me a topic =]
(link)
|
a possible theme could be like..... to overcome one's physical and mental limitations to acheive a goal
this could be a theme because christopher has autism and had to overcome his fears of talking to people and other fears his diease brings him to prove his innocence
|
|