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Female

Location:

Indiana

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Student

Age:

18

Member Since:

March 9, 2008

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Last Update:

March 21, 2008

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General Sex Questions

about

I'm a college student majoring in political science and pre-law, I like to read and paint, I like to think I've been through my fair share of experiences, some good, some bad, and when answering questions, I particularly pick out ones to answer that are similar to a situation I've been through myself because lets face it, the best advice always comes from someone who's been there!

advice

I've been with this guy for a couple of weeks. He's had sex about 4 to 6 time before, maybe a year ago...he claims he was just horny and looking for action. He's so good to me and I like him oh so much! But I'm scares he's trying to get in my pants since he's known to he a player. But he's so sweet. One of my bestest guy friends was like he's tricking you to get into your pants. I'm not sure...what are some signs he's trying to get into my pants?

Cliche as it sounds, for the most part, you have to go with your gut. Sucky answer, I know, but as females, we have better gut instincts than we think. If he tells you things that don't sit right with you, or just don't feel honest, they probably aren't. And don't think just because he may tell you something nice without trying to have sex directly after saying it, doesn't mean he's saying it out of the goodness of his heart. And listen to your guy friend, after all, no one can interpret a guy's intentions better than another guy.

I have a test on monday for school and i need to study some words.The problem is that whenever I study, I forget what i studied the day of the test.My question is, how do i remember what i studied so i dont fail that test?Any advice helps thanks!

The two biggest tips are:

*space study time out, do it bit by bit over a few days

*do it before you are going to bed, go to bed right after you are done studying, the memory holds items MUCH easier when there is as LITTLE other distraction in between study time and recall. In other words, the more that happens (the more conversations, thought processes, etc.) between when you study, and when you take your test, the harder it is to remember what you studied.

and remember, don't put too much pressure on yourself, stress just makes it worse!

how can i be a happy person if:

i hate where i live
i dislike every person who lives here
i am a moody person and get annoyed very easily
i go on and off with friends, like ill not like them, except one of them, for a week, then get annoyed with that person, and switch off (etc.)
sometimes i dont like any of them
after broke up with my bf almost 3 months ago, i forgot how to be happy, even though im over him now
i couldnt change friends even if i wanted to. the transition wouldnt be worth it.

please teach me how to be happy. i cant make myself have a better outlook on life. it just doesnt work. ill have happy times, but it doesnt last for long.what do i do with myself? i liked it better before i faced the reality of life. last year i was oblivious now after my 5 month relationship, i cant find that same high spirited person i used to be. where did that person go? how can i be that person again? how do i stop my moodiness? i cant help it.

thanks;;
xhopeless

try not to take this in a depressing way, but at some point, we all lose that "high spirited" person. And the one thing you could do to waste your time is to try chasing that person. Don't forget that as humans, we tend to exaggerate the past. The past is almost always remembered as "brighter, happier, and better" than it really was. As much as you'd hate the transition, the truth is that if you are so miserable where you are, you really have nothing to lose. I don't know you, or your friends, but from an outside perspective, logically, if these people aren't making you happy now, they probably never will. Re-evaluate. maybe the transition would be worth it.

I'm a 42 y/o single man. Less then a month ago my best friend died in an accident. I have not been able to come to grips with his death. I have recently been having thoughts of ending my life. This happens whenever I am alone, especially at night. I have lost loved ones before, including my parents and brother all within a year of each other, but I never felt this type of despair, or loneliness. I am afraid I may eventually give in to my suicidal urge. Can anyone help me?

when you think about suicide, think about the people in your life that you could be putting in the exact same position that you are in right now from losing you. I know the last reason anyone contemplating suicide to avoid it is that you will "hurt everyone you care about", but from someone who's lost a friend to suicide- ponder this:

When you take your own life, yours is not the only life you are taking. Years after the incident, I'm still wondering when I will stop being so angry for a friend to take himself away from me. Don't make someone you care about as hurt and as angry as someone like I am.

lately ive been having trouble with my math teacher. First off, he has an attitude and could seem to careless wether I pass or not. I try to ask questions, but sometimes he won't call on me or will make me wait for longer then ten minutes. On a progress report he said I needed to seek extra help, but getting him to stop and work with me in a helpful way is very difficult. Those are all things I could work around, I suppose, but it gets worse. Once when answering a question, he wasn't happy with my tone of voice (i wasn't cheery enough for math class?) and wanted me to have a better attitude and made me re say the question. He gives inprofessional comments like today when I was in a bad mood about the work I was doing (was not acting innapropiate to him in any way) he said he has a younger granddaughter and hopes she doesnt turn out like me and that I act like everything in life is a chore. He doesn't know me outside of math class and has no right to judge me.
I talked to my mother and she wants to call the school, but I really dont want him to dislike me any more. What do I do? Let my mother call? Or just ignore it? I want to talk to him myself but I dont think I could do it without crying, because this realy upsets me.

TRUST ME- if he dislikes you more after parents calling, he will NOT show it. But try talking to your guidance counselor first. Tell her or him you have serious problems, it's really interfering with your academics and you don't feel like it's a positive environment. Make sure you give examples of things he's said. If you don't notice a change, let your parents call. When a kid makes a complaint about a teacher being unprofessional, it's a huge deal. You do NOT deserve to be treated that way, and when your parents (the tax payers!) make a point, the school will not ignore it, and he'll be notified that if there are more complaints from you or your family, it can put his job in jeopardy. I went through the same thing when I was in high school. Finally I talked to my guidance counselor and my parents called and even though the teacher HATED me, she never bothered me again. In fact, she seemed a little scared of me! If you let it go, he will keep doing it to students long after you, you need to make it known to him that his actions do not go without consequences.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 10 years. And some acquaintances we know through my boyfriend's brother are getting married in another state. My boyfriend strongly dislikes the girl, and is not a big fan of the guy, but I like them both. I have attended their annual Christmas party a few times and never accompanied by my boyfriend. He has already said the isn't going to the wedding, but I am thinking I may. He is against me going, saying since he's not going, I shouldn't. The invitation had his name listed first, so I am not sure if it would be odd for me to go on my own without him, since they are friends of his brother's. These people aren't close with us at all, in fact I just see them at their annual christmas party. Perhaps, the invitation was just a nice gesture? What should I do?

Thanks!

I would go, and try to convince him to come with. Few people send wedding invitations as nice gestures, every head costs some money, and you must have stuck out enough to feel that you were worth putting on the guest list. If you want to go and feel awkward without your boyfriend, mention he couldn't come but it was important you came on behalf of both of you to congratulate them. Hey, if you have a wedding gift, I doubt they'll wish you weren't there!

okay my friend and i were wondering "does you cherry pop if you use tampons?"

It's not a sure thing, but it's pretty common. Same with sports, lots of activities will do it. It's totally normal.

Yeahh okay im 14/f, im not to young so dont even say that cause im about to be 15. Dont worry!
So like im not saying i want it to happen, like having sex. But sometimes it just happens, and I want to be prepared. Because me and this guy were making out like A LOT on the floor and like he started to unzip my pants and stuff, but I have MORALS! I told him not to. But like even if I wanted to go for it, like idk if Im ready. Like in the emotinal since and like physically because im not on birth control : which im really scared to ask my mom about, and I didnt have a condom, like I know he may have had one but I wouldve felt better if I carried them too : which I would feel very embarassed about buying.

So what I really am asking advice about it is:
-How do I know Im ready?
-How do I tell my mom I might need birth control?
-How do I find a way to be more comfortable buying condoms?

In general how do I protect myself! lol

Thank you for reading this long piece of crap :]]

I have to applaud your willingness to lay that out and look for advice on being ready. BUT- age, and anything else regardless, neither I, nor ANY of these other people can tell you that you are or are not ready. Sucks! But ultimately it is YOUR choice, and don't let other people use shallow facts to decide for you. As far as figuring it out for yourself, sex isn't much different from most decisions you make. You're obviously not stupid, you realize all sorts of consequences as well as benefits. It can be a really awesome, or a really terrible thing. One of the main factors you didn't include was the WHO. Just look at it at all angles. If you don't know the answer to a question you have, find it. (not health stuff here, look on a planned parenthood or other legit website) Look at all your possible outcomes, and decide what you can and cannot live with. As for the other two, be as honest with your mom as you were here. Explain how you feel, that it doesn't mean you're for sure, but you want facts and you want to be prepared. Even if she gets upset, she might have words of wisdom for you (gross! i know!). And hey, there are very few people out there comfortable with buying condoms, it's always uncomfortable to reveal something so personal to a total stranger (i.e. basically telling the cashier "yes! i have sex!) To correct some of the other advice you got, YES, sometimes it DOES just happen. Anyone that tells you it's easy to decide when and where and with who obviously isn't aware of what a real sex life means. So don't ever ever ever think you don't need to ask these questions. Being able to recognize the fact that you need some answers to make a decision is a VERY mature thing to do. Good luck, you are the only one that can decide if you are ready!

so i asked this guy to sadie hawkins dance. he said yes, and my friend has been trying to "matchmake" us.
hes not the type to show much affection and its going kinda slow, so what can i do to speed things up? i really like him and i want this to go somewhere!
any advice!
thankyou
female/17yo

The good news is: Asking him to a dance is a huuuuge accomplishment. It means that even if he's not sure he wants to date you, he's at least interested enough to want to spend the night with you and learn more about you. There isn't much to do to "speed it up", he has to decide on his own time if he really likes you, but try to make it a little obvious that if he were so interested, you would want to see him again (given the dance goes well) Mention little stuff, it doesn't even have to be something you really mean like "oh? you like doing (fill in the blank) too? we should totally do that sometime!" Guys like to live in the moment, so bring up something in the near future to get his mind in thinking about seeing you again so he can consider it. Remember, guys are so less perceptive to signals than girls, it's okay to be a little obvious you want a second date, make him comfortable with asking you

15/f

i have to write an outline, but i don't know how, for like my paper. like for the intro. what do i put? i know in outline looks like this..

I.
A
B
1
2

etc.

but like for intro, and conclusion what do i right in for that?

Placementwise in an outline, your introduction is first. Basic outlines are such:

I. Introduction
II. Body
III. Body
IV. Body
V. Conclusion

(with basic details under each numeral)

Under your intro and conclusion numerals, your "A, B" (etc) will be what you plan to use for those. Will you open with a story about your topic? A Statistic? Will you end with a restatement of your point? and the like. It's all very basic, you are simply creating the bones of the paper, a road map, so to speak. There's no real exact science to it, just copy out your plan on how you are going to cover the prompt given to you.

Okkay, Me and my boyfriend started dating like a week ago.
I think I already love him but im scared to tell him. Im scared because I think its too early to say it. Should I wait for him to say it or what?

Thanks.

Waiting is good. Think about it this way, if you wait, you have chances to absolutely make sure. Also, don't "wait for him to say it first", but it's a good idea to give some time- he might not come to terms with feelings as quickly, and you don't want to pressure him so quickly to feel like he HAS to make a decision about loving you RIGHT NOW. Yeah, sure as women we all like to hear it first, but trust me, any woman that tells you "oh, when he said I Love You, I thought about it and agreed" Almost every woman knows before her boyfriend. Why? Women are more in tune with feelings than guys. So wait, not because he might not love you, but because most guys just need a lot more time than women to come up with the right answers to things!

Hey ok well im 13.f. and lately, i have been really emotional. i mean, out of no where, i'll start crying. not to brag or anything, but i have everything i could possibly want; health, a good family, a good home, nice things, etc.

I'm constantly sad and emotional...but i honestly don't know why. Please help me? Thank you so much

This sounds like a cop out, I know, but there is nothing weird or wrong with you. 13 year old girls are notorious for "emotional". And I know it feels so extreme to you (I'm a girl, we've ALL been there!) but it really is completely normal. Little things set you off, you cry for strange reasons, and you blow up at people? Welcome to womanhood (ick! I know!) Ask any woman, it gets better. Sometimes it takes a few years, sometime it takes a lot of years, but it eventually balances out. If you are really really concerned though, check some of you mood swings with when you get your period, some women can have extreme emotional issues to accompany their period (just normal overload of hormones) and you can see a doctor, choose to ride the mood swings out, or get medication. Yeah, it's crazy and weird, and you HATE it, but I promise it gets better.

im new at my school and im a freshman. i didnt move or anything i just used to go to a different school. so anyways im really quiet in basically all my classes because i feel reallyy uncomfortable. because of that, i only have a few friends. why am i so quiet around people i dont know? why cant i be open and outgoing like my friends? also now i never feel as happy as i used to feel, when i went to my old school. like, right now, i feel sad..and i dont know why. i tried playing guitar to make me happy because that usually does, or watching tv, and that stuff. but nothing is really working..i still feel sad. my mom and sister wanted to go out to dinner tonight and usually i like that feeling of getting out of the house on a week night, but not this time..i dont want to go..and i dont know why. i feel like somethings wrong with me lately..im not depressed, but i dont know..at school since im so quiet when im not around people i like, others think im weird..but im not. im a fun loving talkative girl once you get to know me. but other people dont see that because they never talk to me. but im too shy to talk to them. so im basically screwed. how am i supposed to make more friends, if im so quiet? it really upsets me.

First of all, never think anything is wrong with you because you feel sad that you moved schools and aren't socializing the way you want to. Especially in high school. Duh, it's really hard to spend 7 hours a day somewhere you feel isolated. There's this phenomenon in human psychology that pretty much everyone thinks the rest of the world is paying more attention to them than people really are. When you do something weird or uncomfortable, you always feel like everyone is watching, and honestly think about, all the things other people do in the hallways, or in class, that you never even notice. I'm really shy too, and whenever I find myself withdrawing from a social situation, I remember that complex, and start to feel more comfortable talking and interacting. If all else fails, just remember, what is there to lose?

okay so theres this guy that i like. and he likes me back. but then he goes and tells me how 3 girls from this other school like him (i know all of these girls btw) and tells me that 2 of them were fighting over who would get to hook up with him and stuff. like i just thought that was really obnoxious of him to do. and yeah when one of his friends asked me out last week i told him, kinda to make him jealous, but idk like i just dont know if i should like him anymore or not. like should i keep going normally like texting him and stuff or should i lay off and play hard to get?

Ha, as trite as it sounds, yes men are relatively unintelligent creatures. It's a safe bet he's exaggerating QUITE a bit about other girls especially if you have suspicions that he likes you. He's "testing the waters" so to speak. He doesn't want to get rejected by you, and is probably blowing things out of proportion in an attempt to see what reaction you give him. I'd say, don't totally give up if you like him, but don't humor him by putting up with the bullshit. Make it clear that if he wants to waste time testing you, you have other options. Even be up front with him about it if you have to. Tell him either shape up and ask you out if he likes you, or to leave you alone

can you get pregnant if you have sex while on your period??

It's definitely not a from of birth control and generally the answer is yes. But, ovulation isn't random. You ovulate sometime within a span of 3 days exactly 2 weeks into your cycle (of 4 weeks) So if you're asking as birth control, the answer is yes, and you need another form, but if you has unprotected sex and are worried about pregnancy, your risk is lower than when not on your period.

Okay so today in school we were working in our groups because we have to create our own political parties and each member of the group had to choose two topics that they wanted to talk about. We went around the group to see what each person's points were, and mine really sucked. In general, sometimes I feel like I don't have basic knowledge of things going on in the United States and just in general. I mean, I know stuff and follow the news from time to time, don't get me wrong here...but I always feel so slow and inferior to everyone else at school, like I don't know anything. How do I overcome this feeling and how do I gain more knowledge?

The best news is that it's an easy subject to work on. I know it seems boring, but the only way to get better is to watch the news, read the paper. Also, in politics, it's all about opinion. And there are plenty of stupid people that voice theirs. So, think about some major issues, (abortion, stem cell research, same sex marriage, the basics) and just think about how you feel. Don't be afraid to look up info on anything. It's easy to find.

I sent my application to 3 campuses in the middle of November and still haven't gotten a response. I checked my status and it says that everything is in. I am pretty sure I can get at least into one of the campuses but what's the long wait? Other people applied later than me and got in already. I am not sure if it's because they only applied to one campus or what. I don't see what good calling would do because they would probably say to keep waiting. AM I getting rejected? If I were, would they just tell me sooner? What should I do?

Chances are, you are not rejected or accepted. Generally, schools review applications, make a decision, and send them out. You are probably the "in between group" They don't know if they want to accept you, but they aren't ready to toss you out yet. Another one to consider is what you filled out as majors. Many schools have colleges within them (business college, liberal arts, etc) so maybe you got rejected from the major you applied for, so they sent it to your second choice major.

16-f

im a sophomore in highschool
and i really would LOVE to be a nurse but i dont have any money and cant get a job until maybe september of my junior year i live in iowa, UA and i cant figure our anything that can get me where i want with what little i will have by then.

please help
i really would love it i need it soo bad
thanks

START PLANNING!!! Work hard on everything, it will open up scholarship opportunities. Compare prices, locations, everything about schools. Join a site like fastwebs, they email you all sorts of scholarship opportunities (easy stuff, writing papers and the like. It's good to start putting away money, but student loans are the friendliest loans ever. Banks love to give them out, they want you to succeed, especially for nursing, it's a career that almost guarantees a well paying job direct after graduation (my sister is one )so don't worry too much about being stuck with debt.

when you are hanging out with a guy, where ever it may be [such as his house, movies, etc.], what are some cute things that a girl can do that a guy really likes? or what are some cute ways to flirt, etc.? Also, is there something that a girl can do to get a guy to kiss her, without asking it directly or it getting ackward?

You have to make him feel comfortable with kissing you. Every guy's worst fear is getting rejected. Just touch him (not excessively) just really subtle. Brush his hand, or lean up against. Use body language that makes you approachable. It may SEEM obvious to you that you're all over him, but guys are sloooooow to the hint :)

How do I forget about someone I'm so crazy about? There's no hope of getting back what I had in the past and my only choice right now is to move on. But I need help on how to do that.

I wish there was something better, but the biggest help is honestly time. Also, make an effort every time you find yourself listing all the wonderful things you miss about him, cut it and think about all the good things about NOT having him. (even if it's just 2) Start to look in a new angle, think about all the other GREAT people you will meet, AND, all the new people that will get a chance to know you

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