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calamityz6789@yahoo.comLocation:
Georgia (U.S.A)Member Since:
June 6, 2005Answers:
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I am open minded and try to be as tactful and honest as possible. When looking at a question I attempt to understand all perspectives so that I can give the best possible solutions. I think that anonymity is best when answering questions, so I leave out most of the details about me. I really would like to help! I appreciate all feedback, so please let me know what you think. Thanks, Calamityz
advice
My friend told me that he was moving away...I'm very bummed about it but I dont know what I can do...Can someone please help me like how did you feel and what did you do and everything. Thanks a lot!
I have had to move a few times and have had friends move away and it never seems to get easier. However, it will happen. There is always college or another job or _something_. If you are such good friends then the friendship will not end, but it will take effort on both of your parts to keep it going. Try and opt for cell phone plans with free long distance if you like talking on the phone, otherwise e-mail each other at least once a week (or if its too hectic during the week then write about all your drama on the weekend). Real letters are also fun to recive once in a while (or post cards,I'm sure you can find a few touristy ones). When I moved I was crushed becuase I was leaving friends and family. Its has been a few years since then and I still wish that we were nearer but we call at least every three weeks or so, always on birthdays, or if we just need to vent. We also keep up with e-mails most of the time. Its not always perfect though. Some months there is hardly a word, while others we talk three times! If it means a lot to you talk to your friend about it and tell him that you'll miss him. Just because hes moving doesn't mean that you wont talk ever again, jsut have realistic expectations (basically he won't be there quite as much) and your friendship should persevere.
i like this guy on the internet but he'll be a senior next year and hes hot he says that i am to but im afraid to say anything else ill be a freshman and he lives like 5 states away and its on msn not no chatline
Over the age of about 19 or 20 age difference starts to matter less, but in high school a freshman dating a snr is a _big deal_. Often it is simply assumed that he wants oyu (the freshman girl) becuase you are easy to take advantage of. More than that, its 5 states away! If this guy is just a crush I' recommend trying to find another who is closer to your age and closer to home. If you still really want this specific guy, then the only way to do it is talk to him. Just ask hiim if he could ever see you guys as moer tahn friends. If you've that good of friends, hes' probably alredy thoguht about it anyway. But is your whole relationship online? How would it be face to face, or on the phone? Is it worth hundreds of dollars in plane tickets? Of course most first answers to those questions is "of course its ok, hes perfect," but just think about how much time, energy and money you (both) would have ot put in to make this work.
can a doctor tell if a girl has been touching herself?
A doctor can't tell unless the areaa is particularlly red and raw, and thats only if the doctor is gyno (actually specializes in looking down there to make you're disese free). Unless you tell the doctor he/she won't know.
I didn't really know what to put this under, but oh well. Around my house there is NOTHING to do. I mean I have a ps2 and tvs and IMs. But it's all so boring. Does anyone know any good websites I can go to or anything I can do to make life more exciting? P.s. I live in a small area with like nothing in the town to do and I have no one til like 3 during the day to take me anywhere.
well if you type in bored to google you get a bunch of web sites. My personal favorite (yes, I have been that bored) is http://bored.overnow.com/. Go to the side bullets (titled "other weird crap, actually useful, etc), and you can find even more to entertain you. Scavanger can be fun for a few days as well, and some sites give you _tons_ of ideas of things to do w/ friends or alone or in the rain or outdoors. There is so much out there so enjoy the site but find some others.
does anyone know how metalolism works? like how much do calories do you burn a day? and how much running does it takes for you to lose some weight. how will 2 or 3 miles everyother day effect my weight after a month. what about every other day. i plan to run all summer and lift weights too.
Metabolisim is how much energy your body burns. Your resting metabolism is how much your body burns while you are doing nothing (such as sleeping or watching t.v). If you weigh more your body may have a higher metabolism to adjust to all of the food you are eating (not that you aren't eating the right amount, especially for guys who eat more, just that your body will adjust). Anyway, if you run/do physical activity you raise your metabolism (the faster you run the faster your metabolism gets) and then when you stop running it may stay higher for the next 30 min/hr (which is why it is important to replenish your body w/water and maybe a healthy carb after a work out). If you have more muscle your body will also burn more energy. 2 or 3 miles every day (say 3 or 4 times per week) would depend on your level of fitness. Do you usally work out? Are you over weight? If this is new for you, you could loose as much as 7 or 8 pounds (keep in mind people tend to loose weight quickly in hte beginning , or when a new significant diet/work out change is made). This is assuming you eat the same amount as before (or more healthily...like eating more but of the right foods) and do a fast jog (break into sweat, can't talk too easily). If you are starting out then don't do too much too soon and burn out. Small changes will help and probably keep you on track. This site can help you calculate your metabolism and give your more info. http://metabolism.com/news/news/2001-05-25
I like this guy, Jared. He is my friend, but i dont know how i can get him to like me that way. Im a very out going person and well usually, thats how i get my guys. But he is different. I dunno its just all so frustrating. PLease help!!
I rate
You can't really get any guy to "like" you all of a sudden. If you take a random person (say, the guy who sits closest to you in one of your classes, or the guy who you work with) you couldn't really be "made" to like him, right? Same thing here. To get noticed (and I mean in a classy way, not a slutly need attention kinda way), you have to be confident in yourself and show him that you can have fun together. Maybe start out with a casual hang out situation (if you aren't already) and see if that is comfortable. If this guy is differnt it may be becuase he wants more than fun/spontaneous/outgoing. He probably just wants somone he can talk to (dependable/can keep a secret/ open). Next time you guys are together try to talk. Not just chat about stuff - talk. See what he thinks. At some point, if you really want this, just bring it up. If you are straightforward (guys usally dont do the hint thing very well) then he won't relaly be scared by it. Its just talking. Talk about the possiblility of you guys dating/being more than just friends. Ask him what he thinks (because I'm sure he has; almost every guy who has a girl - who - is - a - friend has at least _thought_ about it). The worst he can say is no. As in no, but he thinks that you make a great friend. Just be calm, rational, and straightforward (I think I say that a lot, but only becuase it is essential).
Ok, I just wanted to thank me ppl for their advice. I found out the she is having a relationship behind my back. This is the new one. I just went to our senior prom and met this girl. She is the bomb, I mean everything about her is perfect in my eyes. I almost hooked up with her and found out that one of my friends like her,but she doesn't like him that way. I'm in some trouble on this one. LOL. What should I do on this one. Arrrrgh, why do my friends and i like the same girl.
Why are your friends your friends? Probably becuase you guys have stuff in common and are similar in some ways. Clearly you have the same taste in something (maybe music, movies, video games), and now girls as well. How good of friends are you? Realize that if you go out or hook up with her, it may be the end of your friendship. Is it worth it? If you ask him first and explain stuff and he says that he's fine with it you may have more permission to go after her, but be careful becuase he may not want to upset you or let you find out that he is upset about the situation. The safe thing to do is to let the girl go (there will be others), no matter what your friend says.
okay-- the guy i like knows i like him and he keeps tellin me hes thinkin about me and he told me he could see me as a potential girlfriend... so how long do you think it would take for him to fainnaly ask me out?? ive already been waiting like 3 weeks (and im just a lil bit curious!!) thanks!!
he knows you are egar so it may take him a while. Esetnailly you are ghe girl friend,just without the commitment. Since he already knows you that you like him he may take another week or two, but since you guys have hung out before it may be sooner. I'd avoid the moive hang outs for a bit to see if he is serious. If he is he will get the message: movies are not dates.
any on know how i can keep my shoulder length hair of my face
bobbie pins usally work well, especially when you use them with some small hair ties and (strong) hair gel. Go light on the hair gel thoguh, otherwise you may end up with paper like hair.
Four years ago I dated a really cool guy, he was all over me calling and going out for 4 months, then he just didn't show up for dinner one nite and we only spoke once briefly after that, he said he didn't need anyone worried about him. (He's a serious workaholic) but over the years i've run into him at a couple parties of mutual friends and just two weeks ago we ended up hanging out and i've been seeing him again since last, last sunday. He's being a doll and has picked up right where we left off! I'm pretty sure that, that is just his style - dates for 4-6 months then it's adios. I'm having fun, but trying to keep a step back, because it's inevitable that the same thing is going to happen. Do I just have fun for however long it lasts?
Bring up "the event." It doesn't have to be serious, but make it in person. He may just be afraid of commitment. Was there something specific that you may have said/done last time to scare him away (broguht up mariage, kids etc)? If he is vauge or wants to "keep the past where it belongs" explain that you were only concerned becuase you like him (at that point it is your risk on weather or not you want to stick around for six months. If you do then make it fun and not a heavy commitment so you don't get too attached to somone who might run away). However, his reaction should tell you enough about weather he is afraid of commitment or is just out to have a good time.
My ex-boyfriend and I have remained friends for the past 2 1/2 years after we broke up. We haven't seen each other in 2 years. He lives many states away from me. A year ago, he started living with this girl and had a relationship with her. He broke up with her a couple of months ago. We made plans for me to visit him at the end of May. They got back together a week ago.
I mean, he still wants me to come too. He's still excited to see me. He said she's cool with it too. It's so painful to know he's back with her. But I want to see him, I need to see him.
I don't understand, when all he talked about was breaking up with her for months before he actually did it. He always told me he didn't want to be with her. And so now...? I mean, he told me he stayed with her for as long as he did because of her kid (from a previous relationship). He adores the kid. I think that's a big part of the reason he got back with her.
Is it hopeless for me to even want to be with him? I love him and I want this friendship more than anything. He really cares about his friendships and friends...and I'm a good friend to him...like a best friend...and I know he wants that. But how and why? Why not more? Does more ever come out of it?
You need to talk with him and let him know how you feel. Weather or not the other girl is there, you need to let him know, and ask him if he feels the same way. Be as straightforward as possible, because you don't want to be confused when it comes to love. If he doesn't want more than a friendship, then you aren't helping yourself by keeping in touch with him. If you want to move on then make a clean break. Expalin to him that you love him as a friend and have tried to maintain a freindship but it is just too painful. Holding onto him is preventing you from finding love again. (And yes, you can). Be ready, becuase it will not be easy, and don't let him manipulate you into hanging on (it needs to be everything or nothing. Dont hold onto the dream of him). Call your other friends and get in touch, even if its just to chat. It may not bet the same but it will be a distraction. If you are going to do it then make sure that it is once and for all, becuase you have to get over this love that you have been hanging onto or you _both_ have to work at keeping it.
I believe in sex after marriage, but my boyfriend is persisiting i have sex with him. He aggrivates me ALL the time and I can see myself giving in. I know I will regret it as soon as I've done "the deed". I'm confused as to what I should do; should I choose the easy option and give in? or go by my wishes and wait?
If he truly loved you then would he push you to do somehting that you have told him that you don't want to do? Explain to him again. Make your wishes known. If he still doesn't get the message then look for someone who is willing to listen and _understand_ you. If you do decide to have sex with him then don't just do it in the moment. Clearly sex means a lot, so make it special, and with the right person.
I recently started dating a guy with a very very close family. I am 22, he is 24, and still living with his parents while he saves up to buy a house. The problem is that I'm starting to see signs of his parents making too many decisions for his life.
First of all, he is christian, and quite religious. Me and him have made the decision to wait to have sex, at least for now. I think this is a personal decision that is between me and him.
He stays at my house sometimes, and has already slept in the same bed at me while staying at my mothers house, at my house, and at my sisters house. There is not a problem with this because we are both adults, and are very capable of making out own decisions.
But, recently he told me that he doesn't think he should stay at my house anymore because his parents are already getting suspicious. He has already told him that we're not having sex, but, apparently, they don't believe him, and are trying to stop anything from happening.
Another thing is that I'm planning a trip to Florida, and he really wants to go. He is allowed two weeks vacation from work, and would only need one week. The problem is that he works for his father. I would not see a problem if his father told him "I don't think I can give you the time off, because I need your help here" But, instead, he said "I don't think you should go because you need to save your money"
This guy is 24 and is capable of making his own decisions on where he sleeps at night and what he spends his own money on.
I'm wondering how I could make this clear to him, that it bothers me, without making it uncomfortable. I do not want to make things uncomfortable for me and his parents, him and his paretns, or me and him. Any advice would be much appreciated.
I do not think that you are being unreasonable, but there is no nice way to talk about this. This guy is being led by his parents, and he may not evne want to grow up. When is he planing on buying this house? Next month or in two years? If things are serious between you guys and his stay with his parents apears to be finite then let things go for now. Realize, though, that until he deicdes to change he will always be strongly infludenced by what his parents tell him to do (especially since he works with his dad). If you explain that he (and this trip) means a lot to you, and that you feel that he should be able to decide weather or not he goes. If he still is not able to leave then realize that he is 24, and if he is not willing to get some backbone now, then he may never be willing.
hey!! my hair is just under my boobs,a bunch of layers,and bangs up to the middle of my lip.My fave is oval and i have brown soft hair. Please tell me the PERFECT hair stlye for me!! Or any good ideas for a summery hair style/cut!!
You are lucky becuase so many hair styles work on an oval face. If you want to keep your bangs then make them side swept bangs. Having shorter hair for summer will probably be more comfortable so hair shoulder length (or just above) is ideal. If you have wavy hair go for layers and movement, if you have straight hair then you can go for some choppy razor/funky edges that can also be fun. One of the best ways of finding out _exactly_ what you want is to go through a magazine and pick out a few things. If you go to a hair stylist with a few pictures she will probably be able to tell you what would work best as she is most familiar with you hair type and life style (maintanace).
I have a little brother (who though i love him very very much) is overweight. Not really badly but it's no longer cute "baby fat". He's 10 years old and has problems running and stuff. It's not his fault. He loves food, and it always puts a smile on his face. If he's upset or mad, my parents will offer him a soda or bowl of icecream. They offer him food when there's no way he can be hungry. I'll come home from swimming practice at 3:00 and be starving. I'll grab a piece of pizza and stick it in the microwave. my mom will see and yell to my little brother who's in his room playing PS2... hey honey... want some pizza? then tell me to cut him a small piece because he just ate lunch an hour ago. he'll come in the room and ask if he can have some chips and a soda w/ it. "of course honey". and she asks why he's overweight. i've tried to make her stop a couple times but she doesn't understand that he's not old enough to make good desicions about what he eats. we got to mcdonalads and he'll order two cheeseburgers,fries, a soda, and a sundae. how do i explain to my parents that they're teaching him bad eating habits and he's gonna end up really fat if they don't cut it out... with out insulting them?
I'm so sorry for you, this is your parents job! Since you have to be the mature one in this situation, I'd go to somone they will listen to. If you have already attempted talking to them then ask a doctor or nutritionist (a profestional) to talk with you and your parents. You will probably end up telling them the same stuff, but if they need to hear the harsh version then tell them like it is (being fat = diabetes, heart failure, and ultimately and early death. He may be eating years off of his life). If/when they decide that changes need to be made then first have a family discussion about eating habit/lifestyle changes that the family will make together (so that your brother doesn't feel picked on). Say ( in the familiy discussion) that the family will still keep ice cream, but ice cream is for after dinner. Dont do anything too drastic unless you want to scare him and cause bad feelings. Make sure that he know that eating junk food is ok, just not all of the time. If you awnt to help out father then you can also set the example and ask your parents to do the same. Put the fruit and vagtables in the front of the fridge. Make a healthy snack basket (w/ rasins, yougurt, applesauce, etc). If he has oppinions then let him have his say (remember, this is a family change). If you feel like it would be appropriate then maybe even offer to walk around the neighborhood with him three times a week (or something). I hope that your parents realize that what they are doing can be detrimental to his health, and I commend you on standing up for him.
Please answer as sooon as you can!!
Welp i have been going out with this kid only about 2 weeks and we usualy hangout every day. Every day he also usually goes "down there" But i just got my period and i dont know what to tell him. I dont wanna just come out and be like.."no dont do it i have my period" but what should i say to him??? thankyouu!
If you're not comfortable engouh to tell him then are you sure you should be doing all of this with him? If you know he wont want to then rather tell him, because beleive me, he'll be greatful. (Telling him "no, I've got my period," will probably be enough. Keep in mind that if you aren't the fist girl he's done this to, he is probably expecting your period to come at some point. It shouldn't really be much of a shock).
Yes, I'm going into high school next year and yes, I am freaking nervous. I know it's not as exaggerated as the movies make it seems, what with the plastics and all, but I'm not quite sure what to expect. Somebody enlighten me?
First of all, high school is _not_ a movie (you actually have home work in real life). Cliques and divisions exist, but not to the same extent as in middle school. Smaller schools will probably have more cliques but in general many of the kids will be new to the school (and even kids who have friends going to the school may not be in the same classes). The first few months are when most people find out where they "fit in," but for you that may be two or three different groups. You will probably meet people in your classes, and they will probably be as nervous as you are, so smiling and saying hello will never be a bad thing. Don't feel too comitted to the first person who says hi, you'll find friends fast because everyone is looking. Good luck in high school! Rember to (smile and) Relax!
I noticed how people bribe in their questions, as in "I'll rate a 5 if you answer". Isn't advicenators supposed to be about HELPING? What happened to the world?
I agree! Anyone who is willing to follow blindly just becuase somone is giving advice should be careful. As for "I'll rate a 5," most people should not answer becuase of empty promises; no rating is guaranteed.
ok i have this friend and he is gay but i didnt kno till the other day he didnt tell me i cought him wit a boy and well u kno what happend then... but i really need 2 kno what i should do should i be his friend? or should i tell him that im not his friend no more b/c hes gay?
Your friend probably has not told many people becuase he is afraid that he will end up with no friends. You know his secret and probably found out before he wanted you to so if you are a true friend then make sure that his secret is safe. Many pwople would him as a friend, but they are simply exhibiting a narrow minded attitued towards the situation, proving that they are only confused and scared by something that they do not understand. He is still your friend, and is probably confused by these feelings himself, but he is the same person inside. If you want to be his friend then stick by him and rasure him that you are his friend, will keep his secret, and will stick by him. If/ when he becomes openly gay he will need his good friends to support him.
Hey im a guy and girls always tell me that when i get older that if i have hair on my chest i should shave it! and i am not sure about it! like is it like when girls shave their legs how it has pointy hairs? do you have to do it often? is it weird? where do i shave like by my belly? answers like that!
The best thing to do would be to wax becuase this makes it very smooth and takes a while to grow back (and honestly, the first time is the worst. After that the pain is not that bad). If you are self councious about it then shave or wax or whatever, but I really don't think that having hair on your chest is that big of a deal (unless you are incredibly hairy). Shaving would have to be more often then waxing (every few days if you want to avoid the prickly hairs), and if you don't do it with shaving cream or body wash it may not be as clean shaven. some girls like a guy with no chest hair (especially built guys), but I don't think that shaving your whole stomach would be the solution (honestly, the little trail thing should stay). Mostly (as in all guy/girl situations) every person will tell you something differerent, so go with what you think will look best. But _definatly_ start out shaving/waxing _less_ rather than more.