Hi I'm a 27 year old female from British Columbia, Canada. I work in retail as a sales assoicate. I have an above average intelligence about relationships and mental health issues and love giving advice to those in need. My parents bitterly divorced when I was 13 and through this I learned a lot about relationships. I've also lived through a severe depression and mental breakdown in my early twenties, so I know a lot about mental health. If anyone has a question for me about either of these topics I would be glad to answer as best to my abililty. I would just like to add how much joy this site had brought to my life. I truly believe that by helping others you help yourself.
Website: Life Is What You Make It
Gender: Female
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Occupation: Sales Associate
Age: 27
Member Since: September 20, 2005
Answers: 75
Last Update: August 31, 2007
Visitors: 8647
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21/f
Recently one of my friends (20/m) has blocked me on AIM and myspace and removed me from his friends on facebook. It came without warning so I was obviously confused. I asked him about it on a different AIM screenname and he told me that he never liked me in the first place, tolerated me because he had to, and that I creep him out. I was completely shocked. None of the little that he said made any sense.
We have been pretty good friends for a few years now. We weren't traditional, hang out all the time friends since we go to different colleges, but we always got along and hung out over the summer. We had many a deep conversation and a lot of jokes together. Him just tolerating me for all that time is bogus. We had a good friendship when we were together. We've never dated and never wanted to. I have a relationship of my own and he does most of the time too.
The problem is, I'd really like to continue being his friend. I like the guy. In the past I rarely talked to him using the Internet or phone, we just talked in person over the summer, but now that he's suddenly blocked me from everything I "can't" communicate with him at all to try to sort this out. How can I get him back as a friend without pushing him further away? About all I can do at this point is send him messages on facebook, since he hasn't blocked me completely there, or contact him through that other screenname. I don't want to seem like some sort of stalker by using e-mail, which I've never talked to him through, or the phone, which I've used once. Plus, he's not much of a talker at all unless it is in person.
What makes this situation hard is that I don't know what the problem is and it's not like we were the best of friends or anything. We were close, but only for short periods here and there when we had the opportunity to be together. Usually when you lose a friend it's for a reason. Something specific. Otherwise you just kind of, drift away from each other. That could have easily happened, since we only really talked when we were together. You don't just break all contact with someone that isn't going to bother you anyway unless there is some specific reason or you've suddenly become a huge bag of douche.
I'm feeling really hurt, very confused, and I'm starting to wonder if all my friends don't really like me. I can't stop caring about him and wondering if something deeper is going on or if I did actually do something specific that ended the friendship. The whole thing just doesn't make sense and I'm worried that if I wait until the summer, he'll have a job someplace else and we will just drift apart, but with a negative end. Is there anything I can do to get him back as a friend or should I just go along with it and hope he comes around?
Thanks. (link)
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Wow, that was pretty mean of him to do that to you, especially if the two of your were once good friends. The only thing that I could think of was that someone close to both of you spread a nasty lie about you to make him do something so cruel.
Is it possible that this boy might have had romantic feelings for you that you didn't know about? That is almost always a reason for a male friend to cut off contact with a female friend. Maybe he secretly liked you but figured if your in a relationship he could never pursue you, and it was too painful to just be your friend so he decided to cut you out of his life.
But still, it was a very cruel and immature thing to do. You don't need people like this in your life, and I wouldn't waste my time trying to figure this guy out. He owes you an apology at the very least, and with friends like him do you really need enemies?
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Hello ! =]
Well tomorrow i have an interview at Hungry jacks and i'm really nervous and really shy lol,
does anyone know what sort of questions they ask ?
MuchLOVE !
xoxooxoox (link)
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First things first: you need to relax! If you are nervous and shy they will pick up on that and I will guarantee you won't get the job. They will be looking for confidence and capability. I'm pretty sure they will be asking you questions like why should we hire you? And what are your greatest strengths? Also if I were you I would go online and do some research about the company, because sometimes they will ask "why do you want to work for us"?
Give them good eye contact, dress up professionally and I was told once to never swivel in my chair or play with jewellry, because it's a sign of nervousness. Good Luck!
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does anyone have a quote or song lyrics about a guy that you like who sort of likes you back but he likes someone else more?
thanks in advance! :) (link)
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Yes i do!
The band is called The J. Giels Band.
The song is called "Love Stinks"
The lyrics say "well he loves her, but she loves him, and he loves somebody else, you just can't win",
Love Stinks! Yeah Yeah!
You can get the song off the wedding singer soundtrack.
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I am 7 months pregnant. I love the babys father, he was great for a while. Then I got laid off for being pregnant and couldnt find another job. He works non stop and I know he is stressed from it. His son is coming out to vegas for the summer in 2 weeks. The problem is as of lately he has been making me feel so horrible that its driving me into a depression. lets put it this way, he is screaming at me about going over my 1000 minutes because I am the one that does bills over the phone and deals with bill collectors. Then tells me he is setting us up for less minutes. He yelled at me while i was at the hospital , and basically laughes at me when i am in pain with all this....he is so incompassionate. Then while we were leaving the hospital he decides to tell the guard i just got a shot in my "kiester" and that i am a "pussy" when it comes to pain. Then i make a comment while passing the maternity ward that we will be there soon. his response was "yeah you will, not me not me ill be fishing" Then said "oh im jk" I found out I am diabetic , he told me to get over it. He says so many things that hurt. But i dont feel that i can justify myself due to the fact he is always at work. A part of me wants to leave. But another part of me doesnt want to leave the father of my baby. I dont know what do to, or whats best for the baby..he will treat her like gold , its me behind closed doors that suffers.
(link)
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Wow, I feel so badly for you. I think definately you need to leave this guy. He'll only lower your self esteem until it's so low you WON'T be able to get out of this. He's sounds very controlling and abusive to me. Do you have any friends or family that you could stay with for now? I know it's hard to leave because he is your baby's father, but come on now what kind of a life will you have if you stay with this creep. What kind of man laughs at his woman who is in pain? You know you deserve better than this. Good Luck.
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How do you get a person that hurt you really bad off your mind. Because I just can't handle being used. (link)
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You can't. The only thing that will get them off your mind is time, plenty of time. It takes time to heal everything. I know for me it took me almost a year to get over the guy I thought was the love of my life.
In the meanwhile, do things to keep your mind off them. Make new friends, join a class, volunteer, write in your journal. Excerise is also a wonderful way to keep your mind preoccupied. Join a gym, prefferably a co-ed one where you can meet lots of other people.
Never lower your expectations. Keep working on your life and yourself. Don't measure your success by whether or not your in a relationship.
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My boyfriend dumped me about 3 months ago. It was a great relationship that almost lasted a year. He was the only guy I've ever loved and we had so much together. The problem is, I can't let go. I still wake up depressed, cry sometimes, and talk about him constantly. Him & I barely talk but are on good terms. I don't understand why I can't move on? It's like I have this undying hope he'll come running back to me! Time is not helping and I just want to be happy again. (18/F) (link)
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You are obviously still in love with him. But there is a reason that he is your ex bf. Whenever you wake up and feel depressed I want you to think of all the reasons why you're glad that he's NOT your bf anymore. This is great way to get over someone. Keep yourself busy too with your friends and start dating again. Also; you are still SO young. 18 years old- you have your whole life ahead of you. I'm ten years older than you and I still havent met anyone yet. I'm sure you're a lovely young woman. Time will heal this as well. Just take it one day at a time. Try to live in the present- don't worry about the past or the future.
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15/f. i have a group of friends that i normally sit with at lunch but sometimes they can be really rude to me. like if one day i sit with someone else, then the next day they will be mad a me because i didn't sit with them. like i have some other friends besides them and they get mad if i don't sit with them.
for example at a school fundraiser last year, i talked with another group besides mine for a little and then my whole group was pissed at me and wouldn't talk to me the rest of the day.
why is this? and what can i do to stop them getting mad at me? (link)
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Your friends all sound very insecure and possessive of you. Not to mention extremely immature. The best thing to do is to just ignore them. The next time they try to make you feel guilty for sitting with someone else walk away and find another friend who doesn't treat you this way. If these people were real friends they would understand that you are allowed to have other interests and friends. I went through something very similar in highschool. One of my friends got really jealous because another girl started hanging out with me. It turned out this new girl became a way better friend to me and the other friend was backstabbing me. Also find friends that make you feel good about yourself and don't use you. Hope this helps!
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I am a very honest and driven person. I think this makes me good at what I do for a living. Even so I have a boss that micromanages me and takes credit for my work. She also belittles me even though I have an amazing track record at managing people and I have the numbers to prove it. I guess my question is how do you deal with a dishonorable boss who finds little things wrong and makes your life miserable? I love my job just not my boss. (link)
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I know exactly how you feel. I have a boss a lot like yours. She is always talking behind my back that I'm not doing a good job and she will belittle me in front of others even though I'm one of the nicest; hardest workers in the department. It honestly sounds to me that your boss is clearly jealous of you; and maybe even a little bit threatened by you. My advice to you is; although it may be hard the best thing to do is to ignore it. Your boss is probably just unhappy with her job and probably her life in general. Picking on you is probably her way of letting of steam. Try not to take it personally either. Another thing I do is to go in and ALWAYS be pleasant to her and the other employers when she is around. Even on days when she is clearly being a bitch or is in a pissy mood I will be nice and have a positive attitude. It is my way of showing to her and everyone else that I'm not going to get me down. AND; if things really get bad- you could always go to her superior and let them know what is going on.
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I have been dating a guy for almost 6 months now and as october 25 2006 I had known him a year. I have dated many guys but none I have felt the way I feel about him! He is amazing and i cant seem to get enough of him. Our relationship is pretty much everything I wanted in a rrelationship, could he be the one? (link)
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Here is the advice that someone else gave me once when I asked the same question that you have.
How to tell if you've met "Mr Right".
a. He's committed to being with you in the long run, and is dedicated to the relationship.
b. You can be completely honest. Both of you should feel comfortable expressing how you feel around each other.
c. He can comprimise- he cares enough to talk about your issues until you reach an agreement.
d. You don't want to change him. You love him for who he is and can accept his imperfections- the same goes for him with you.
e. No one looks better! Even if you saw Brad Pitt walking down the street your guy still thrills you the most!
I hope this helps!
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how can you get blackheads out?whats are some REALLY good things to get them out ?? (link)
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Normally I just squeeze them out but the problem is that they keep coming back- if you're a girl I would suggest buying some foundation to even out your skin tone- you can't really get "rid" of them- but there are some good skin cleansers. I use a product called cetaphil- it's a light cleanser that's not too harse and it removes makeup as well. You might want to also try drinking a lot of water- that helps to clear the skin- also sitting in the steam room at the pool or gym clears the pores.
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okay so i'm not going to prom but i AM going to an after prom party that my ex boyfriends having and i want to look AMAZING! and i was wondering how i should do my hair? i'm not that good with stuff like that really. it doesnt scrunch and i straighten it like everyday. its medium length and i dont know what i should do or wear! so somebody please help me! i want my ex boyfriend to feel bad and want me back even though he has a girlfriend! thanks so much. (link)
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My hair is like yours a medium length and it is very thick. I just had my hair done last Saturday at my cousins wedding. I was one of the bridesmaids. I don't know if you would want to try what I did; but I can tell you it only took the hair dresser an hour and everyone loved it! I had her use a curlings iron and she curled my hair into large ringlets. Then she sprayed it with hairspray. It looked awsome!
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Were there movie critics in the 1930s?
And who were some famous people in the 1930s?
Thanks so much for the help! (link)
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Howard Hughes was a huge movie star in the 1930's. Do you remember the movie Leonardo starred in a couple of years ago called Aviator? Well his character was Howard Hughes. I also think that the Wizard of Oz was filled some time in the 30's, and Judy Garland was quite a big star; also Shirley Temple and Charlie Chaplan.
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I'm 18/f. Please don't answer this if you're younger than me... you couldn't possibly have gone through what I am if you're 13... no offense.
I've been in psychoanalysis since I was 10 years old. They THINK I have bipolar disorder, but the psychiatrist told me they can't conclusively know or medicate me until I'm 21-22.
I'm in university right now, and I'm in danger of failing out because of my mental issues... I tried to tell this to the doctor, but she doesn't want to do anything. I'm worried that if I continue at this rate I'm going to fail at university, and at life, and that there won't be a me in 3-4 years to help anymore.
I have suicide hotline numbers, and I have really supportive friends... but everything is so hard, and the doctors are being useless...
Is there anybody here who has been through something similar, and who can offer a few words of advice? I'm dying here, and my exams are coming up.
Thank you for reading this VERY long question.
--Amanda (link)
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I have been through something very similar to what you've just described. I was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was 19 years old. I ended being admitted into the pschiatrict ward during my second semester of my first year at college. I ended up failing all my courses and dropped out. I thought that my life was over. I know that you are scared and think things are never going to get better; but believe me they will. Once you get properly diagnosed and put on the right medication you can lead a normal life. It might take you a bit longer than you thought to finish school or find work but if you hang in there it will all work out for you.
I don't understand why your doctor can't medicate you if you are 18? I know people a lot younger who have been put on anti-psychotic medication. Believe me; if you think you are on the verge of a breakdown by all means admit yourself voluntarily to the psych ward. Sometimes the doctor won't diagnose you with something really serious such as bipolar or schizophrenia UNTIL you have your first psychotic break. Don't do what I did- refuse to acknowlagde you have a problem and then let your illness get the better of you and be admitted by the police and being locked in the bubble room over night.
So if you still are feeling suicidal please please do the best thing for you which is to voluntarily admit yourself into the ward. They won't let you in unless they believe it's quite serious; so this would be a perfect excuse.
I wish you all the best. Trust me; it will get better I promise.
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What does wishing on 11:11 mean? (link)
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Hi,
I actually have a mother who is OBSESSED with 11:11. She even bought a book about it called 11:11. She told me that every time you see 11:11 on the clock that it's the universes way of letting you know that you're on the right path.
I don't mean to freak you out; but she really believes that it's some sort of a message from a higher power. I told her once that I was always seeing 11:11 on the clock and that is was scaring me. She told me that it was a good thing.
There is probably sites on the internet. If you go to a search engine maybe you can find out more about the subject.
ps I don't believe in wishing on 11:11; I believe seeing 11:11 means you will get your wish.
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I have a huge problem! theres this girl, beka, who i cannot stand. She had a stroke before she was born and her arm and leg are paralized, but shes not in a weelchair. I dont judge her about her physical abilities. She takes a shower maybe once or twice a week, she never brushes her hair, and most disgustingly, she has bloody noses alot and she just lets it like dry up and sit there all over her nose!
the worst part is that she (voluntarily)sits with us at lunch and i can barely eat! We used to be friends (sort of... I never really liked her that much) a few years ago. Now she is kinda mean and just real weird. She cries alot when she doesnt get her way, and were in seventh grade! When im around her sometimes she is really rude to other people and I think they might not like me either. I think Beka thinks she can get away from things because of her problem, but she HATES it when people try to help her do stuff. It is SO confusing. I really dont want to be friends with her. Lately i have completely ignored her,even though i feel really bad about doing that. Most of the time she like bows down to me and follows me around EVERYWHERE. I have tried asking her to stop whatever shes doing wrong, and she says sorry about twenty times. But then she just keeps on doing what i asked her to stop doing! I dont know how to say that i dont want to be friends with her
I know it sounds mean, but I just cant stand her any more! SOMEBODY HELP PLEASE!!!
I RATE HIGH!! (link)
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Wow, this is a tough one. I know you don't want to be mean; but at the same time, you need to keep your sanity.
I was in a similar situation in highshool. There was a girl who always tried hanging out with us and she never showered, and was scaring away other people from us. She would even throw tantrums. I remember one time when she voluntarily sat down with us; and I was talking about getting together that weekend with me friends. I never said she was invited, so she got out of her chair and threw it at us!
We did something very mean and I an NOT recommending you do this at all. We wrote her a letter telling her to stay away from us, and that people thought she smelled. I didn't really want to sign it, but my friends pressured me. I felt horrible and even phoned her that night to apologize.
I think the best thing to do is maybe talk to one of your teachers about the situation. Say that you don't want to hurt Beka's feelings, but that she is driving you crazy and that she is scaring away other potential friends.
It sounds like Beka is a very disturbed young lady and has a lot of personal problems that you just can't handle. Maybe she is having problems at home. You said she hardly ever showers or brushes her hair? These are both signs of depression. You also said she cries all the time. Maybe if you talk to your teacher, the teacher can phone Beka's parents and they can all work together to get her some proffesional help. She may even need to be on anti-depressants.
In the meantime, try to keep your distance. Don't be really mean to her either. Remember you are probably the only friend she has. I hope for your sake and Beka's that either her parents or her teachers will take this matter seriously and get her some help.
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I don't attract guys at all. It's been said that I'm a lesbian (which I'm not), and I have an extremely brutal (but with purpose...I don't just say "Fuck the world" for no reason and think it's funny) sense of humor and wear all black. Are these turn-offs? But I'm a nice person. Though I can be a little morbid, I'm generally pretty friendly, I consider others' feelings, and I try to make friends, but nobody at my school wants to be around me. It's inevitable someone will say "Marian, I REALLY wanna sit next to Joe Shmoe. Can you move over?" at least twice a day. I just hate that. Whenever we have to choose partners/teams in gym, I'm always the last person. I feel so lonely, I cry sometimes in the locker room when nobody is around. There's only 1 friend of mine that's a guy who actually appreciates me for who I am, and I now have such a huge crush on him. I don't want to sound conceited at all, but I think I'm a nice-looking person, so that eliminates the idea that guys might not like me because of my looks. Does anyone understand? How can I make more friends? Even though he doesn't like me back in the same way, should I tell this boy I like him, and if so, how?
(link)
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Well I think having a brutal sense of humour, being a little morbid, and dressing all black is probably very intimidating to most guys. Try to put yourself in their shoes. Most guys are already insecure enough about being rejected by girls; so would probably be more comfortable firting with or asking out the girls that look more approachable.
When I was in highshool, guys only dated the girls who dressed feminine like, and had sweet dipositions. And I'm not saying that you don't have these qualities, but your appearance would probably seem otherwise. I also remember that the guys seemed to be disgusted with the girls who acted or dressed differently. There was one girl who had a purple fro and she always wore black. The guys teased her mercilessly.
There is a saying: Don't judge a book by it's cover. I've always believed this, but unfortuneatly, not every person; especially in highschool is this open minded.
If you really want to fit in, you'll have to dress more conservatively, and be less morbid; basically; not being YOU. And do you really want to compromise who you are just to fit in with some immature, superficial teenage boys?
So my advice is to just be true to yourself. You say that you have one true friend? Well that is better than having 20 phoney, superficial friends. I think you're doing fine. I was sort of an outcast in highschool too, so I know what you're going through, and how lonely it is. But you know what? After highschool, people grow up. You'll meet tons of people in college and in the workplace that you can relate to without having to change who you really are. Besides, most guys in highschool are too immature to be in a serious relationship anyways.
I hope that what I've said has made some sense, and that you'll feel better about things.
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Is it okay to be school-oriented...and be scared to have a boyfriend because you don't know whats going to happen in the end. Its like you are in a mix between "I don't know if its going to work out" and "I'm scared it might..." ..? Does anyone get what I'm saying? (link)
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It sounds like two things are going on here. The first is that you're afraid of rejection; and the second is that you're afraid of committment. Either way, both signal to me that you are not ready, or mature enough yet to handle being in a romantic relationship.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling this way. I know people in their late twenties and early thirties who are still aftraid of committment.
I think highschool is a time to focus on your studies, and to get into a good college. You'll have tons of time after you get your highschool diploma to date guys. Don't rush into anything you're not ready for.
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What type of questions do they ask you in a job interview? I'm applying for a job at a bunch of fast food places. (link)
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That's easy:
What do you know about the company?
Why do you want to work for the company?
Are you available any time?
What are your strenghs?
What are your weaknessess?
Define Team Player
Do you work well without supervision?
What are your long term goals?
What can you contribute to the company?
How would you handle a difficult customer?
Do you work well under pressure?
Those are the most common, I've hoped I helped
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Hey Everyone, so, I recently saw Brokeback Mountain, and I wanted to know if anyone had any input on how they found out that Jack Twist was gay. Do you think it was his wife's dad that told people or what? Thanks. (link)
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Hi! I saw this movie a month ago with my dad. I asked him the same question, and this is what he told me. Well if you remember, there was a scene when Jack Twist and his wife were sitting with another couple at a table during a dance. The woman had blond hair and her husband was wearing a cowboy hat. Remember Jack sat outside with the other womans husband during the dance? And he asked Jack if he would like to go up with him one weekend to his cabin to go fishing? Well my dad said that this other guy was a closet homosexual, and that he and Jack had become lovers because Jack was tired of waiting for Heath's character.
So what I think happened is that word got out (not about Heath and Jack Twist), but about Jack being with that other womans husband. If you remember they were both from Texas, and word probably got out. It couldnt have been about Jack and Heaths character, because Heath hever came up to Texas in all the years they were involved.
I hope this answers your question.
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I am an 18 year old female and I have been getting my period since I was about 13. I get my period every month. This month, however, I got my period for about a week(which is normal) ...but now, my period should be done by now. There is no more red blood, however, there is brown when I wipe. It kind of looks like brown blood, if that makes sense. This has never happened to me before in all these 5 years I have had my period. Please voice your opinions if you think you can help. Thank you very much. (link)
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This happens to me all the time when I get my period. After 4 days of the heavy red blooded flow, I usually still have about 3 days with a very light brown bloody stain that only shows up lightly on my underwear or when I wipe. You really have nothing to worry about. I think the blood is brown because it's old? I might be wrong. But that's besides the point. The point is, don't worry, you are normal!!
buzzie
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