Hey i'm not quite sure where to start, i'm a younger sister and an older sister so i understand that stuff (two brothers), i love sports, arts, reading, i hate math, i love giving advice, i want to really help people, i hate gossip, i love animals, and um.. i have friends that are girls and friends that are boys, sorry if that's too long.
Website: Ask Anna
Gender: Female
Occupation: Student
Age: 14
Member Since: July 23, 2007
Answers: 37
Last Update: July 26, 2007
Visitors: 2986
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i wish i could just not worry about what people think.
be normal,be myself, and nothing more.
i wish i could accept myself, prove that who i am, is enough.
and nothing really matters but my happiness.
not worry about the trends,clothes,popularity.
why can't i let that go? and be real? how do i find myself? is it even possible? or will
i always be the scared,shy,little person? i've come accustomed
to me tht way,as much as i hate it.
please help.
thanks (link)
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Here are four tips:
1. See yourself as a success:
You have a little voice inside your head that tells you you're not good enough. Instead of letting that voice continuously judge what you didn't do right, focus on a real moment in your life that makes you feel great. This could be a religious event, a romantic event, and educational event, when you are thinking of this moment say these words, "You know what this (say the bad feeling you are having right there) reminds me of? It reminds me of the time... Then remember, or "live out" your great moment End the moment with the words: Thats what this reminds me of. This is exactly what olympic athletes have for years to increase their physical performance They see it first in their imagination and then they reach their goals.
2. Restore your self confidence:
The second key to getting over your need for acceptance is self-confidence. Confidence is the result of how you see yourself in your imagination. The wya your nervous system makes you feel is the direct result of what's going on in your imagination. That's why when someone describes delicious food your mouth waters even though there is no real food there To your nervous system this food is more real than the actual food itself. SInce that's the case, just think what would happen if you imagined yourself being succesful and confident. When you see confidence in your imagination, your nervous system believes you are confident which changes the vibes you give off. People will treat you better because they can feel your success and want to be around it. This is what actually makes you stop worrying about what others think of you. Those days of wishing in you can now be ancient history.
3. Do What truly fits "the real you"
This may seem like it has no connection to the previous steps, but it goes hand in hand with learning how to accept yourself. An easy way to build your self-confidence is to do what you truly were meant to do in life. What are you passionate about? What have others told you you're good at?
4. Get "Back to the basics"
Most people are not sure what happiness truly is. True happiness comes when you lend someone else a hand it not only brightens their day but it also brightens yours, if only for a brief moment, true happiness!
Now that you know how to gain confidence by focusing on a positive memory instead of the negative voice inside your head, you'll be able to give off the vibes that attract people to you. Instead of wishing and hoping for approval, you know how to accept yourself by giving people what they need, a confident person who not only looks for the good in them, but also shows them how to see it to
Hope it helps!!
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dear duno2200,
well my friend has been really jealous of me and my other friend hanging out a lot i don't know why though1 i mean i don't treat her like crap its just i don't know... do u have any idea to stop her from being jealous???¿¿¿
signed,
upset (link)
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First off make sure you make plans with her sometimes, and include her. Chat with her, make her feel included. If you have to say sry i can't have plans make sure you also say how about we have plans soon.
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Shannon
I know this person and I hate them but they like me what should I do (link)
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First think about why you hate this person are they mean, do they gossip,do they hurt people, then just gently (they have feelings to) say something like i don't like that you do this, but if you stopped i would consider being your friend.
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15/f. Pardon me if this is long. But it's ruining my life.
Last year I was a really lonely and pathetic teenager. At 14, I had no friends I could trust, and all that revolved around my mind, was school and homework. And then I stumbled upon an online forum. There, I made lots of friends and became so much happier. I had gotten more social through the ways of the internet chatroom. The people there all shared my interests and were so nice and sweet to me. It was almost like a dream. I actually thought I was fitting in somewhere. Ever since, to this day, it has become an addiction. Particularly because of one guy. Let's call him "Vibrator". Vibrator is 3 and a half years older than me. That makes him...(well, you do the math, if I'm 15 1/2) And he lives in North America (as I do) He shares my music interests, hobbies and other things such as this. When he talks to me (and we have been talking online on MSN and AIM for a course of one year) he is always so sweet and sugary and amazing. I feel like I've known Vibrator forever. He always compliments me and tells me I'm pretty. It makes me feel amazing. But, I'm a bit paranoid, because I've only seen like ONE picture of him! And I'm always sending him pictures o.o And everything we discuss....personally..is always about me. So I feel as if...he wants to know about me, but never tells me about himself. Is he hiding something? I don't know what to do ! I'm so emotionally attached to him. And he flirts with other girls too, and then tells me later that he has no "sexual" feelings for me. He tells me that we should meet and he tells me he wants to. He manipulates and plays with my feelings. He really is ruining my life. I hate him, but at the same time I like him a lot. I don't know what to do. I really want to meet him. But I'm so unsure. It's becoming an obsession talking to him. And he gets mad very frequently...when he does, I cry. He upsets me a lot. But then he apologizes and plays with me...like that. I cry over him. I can't tell this to anyone. Not even my best friend, because I'm too embarrassed to admit that I like someone online.
What should I do? Please. :( Any piece of advice would be helpful. (link)
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I know this is the last thing you want to hear, but this guy is like a drug for you you're addicted. You've got to lock up your computer or block these sites, he's toying with your mind, you might be embarassed to tell your friends, but you've got to sit down and at least tell your parents. There are clinics for these types of problems, YOU MUST NOT MEET HIM,
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I was wondering, What do guys look for in a friend thats a girl ? Do they like someone who is more boyish?
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I'm not a guy but i hav a bunch of guy friends. IF this is seriously just a friendship and not a soon to be dating relationship then it depends on the guy, if he is interested in sports and comics, then yes he might be looking for that, he justs wants to have something in common with you, he wants someone funny, nice, he wants what a friend that a girl wants also, expect DON'T get all giggly and talk about cute boys
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Im so scared im not going to have a friend next year, all my friends are going to be in seperate hombases!!!!!!!!!!!! I need tips on how to make friends because its hard in middle school,
THANKYOU!! :D (link)
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First off i went through this problem last year. Although you're very nervous middleschoolers aren't vicious tigers, they have hearts too. You'll be spending every day with the kids in homebase, so here are some tips:
1. Be friendly
2. Introduce yourself
3. Sit by other kids
4. Try to get to know people
5. Don't be judgemental
6. Smile
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ok well i'm pretty good at keeping friends (when i'm in school) but anyways i don't know how to keep them interested,you know? people get bored of me fast,i hate it ! i just stop my energy for some reason after a cirtain point. how can i keep my energy up? i'm not sick of them, its nothing to do with them,its me. i just loose energy and stop being so talkative,its weird because i'm usually so much more talkative. any help? this is probably confusing.sorry. (link)
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Maybe you just feel as if you don't have much to say anymore, you've said it all. If you run into this problem you might want to do something different with your friends something bound to bring up a conversation rock climbing, scuba diving. And if that doesn't work you should take the time to think about all the details of these friendships, spice it up!
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I recently just moved to Moore,Oklahoma from Henderson,Kentucky. Everything is different since I moved like on the line of a huge city. I'm so used to living in a small town. Now school is coming up,and Im going to a new school with new people. I want advice because last time I moved it was a disaster. The school I went to was horrible, it was so bad that I wanted to kill myself(no one say I'm emo, i didnt cut myself). No one talked to me and I had no friends, i didnt talk to anyone and no one talked to me. Unless they were going to pick on me. I talked to my mom's friend, who is really friendly and has a bunch of friends. But I'm just so scared of another school that was so horrible that I want to kill myself. What should I do?
P.S. srry if it was a bit long. (link)
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You'll never get to know people if u don't talk to them. Just start a normal conversation hey i'm..." One of the most important things is be yourself, and especially since your moving to a big city there will be tons of people who have the same stuff in common with you. Remember there's no way your going to meet people unless you put yourself out there, if you're having a hard time meeting people and the school seemse cliquey try joing a club or a team.
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I have a very strange question to ask..but please bear with me.
Let's say a guy has a girlfriend that's really ugly. And I know I'm prettier than her. When he shares her pictures and puts her pictures up and is so proud of them...does he realize that she's ugly? or is he so glad that he has a girlfriend that he doesn't care WHAT she looks like, as long as she "belongs" to him. And in this case, he thinks she's the most beautiful girl in the world?
Because it's getting annoying. This guy makes fun of my pictures, when I know I'm SO much prettier. But when he puts up her ugly pictures, he praises them. What am I supposed to say? It annoys me that he makes fun of me, when his girlfriend is disgustingly ugly.
I know it's shallow. =/ (link)
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First off she may not be beautiful but obviously he likes her, you know your prettier than her, and if he makes fun of your pictures you should just tell him that you don't like it when he doesn't, but beware of getting angry and saying well i'm prettier than your ugly girlfriend, because although that might be what you want to say, it will get you nowhere.x
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okay so one of my friends kissed this guy (her boyfriend) and he wasnt suppose to tell anyone he swore to her he wouldnt no one but his best friend and he told his best friend but he also told one of my other best friends. So my other best friend (the one the guy told) told me he told her and said not to tell the friend that got kissed but shes been my best friend since we were 3 but so has the other best friend......WHAT DO i DO????? pleaseee help
thank you so much (link)
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Okay so you don't want to continue the chain of gossip, so what you should do is talk to your best friend that found out about the kissing from the boyfriend, you should talk to her about how it was wrong of the boyfriend to do that and suggest she confronts your friend who kissed the boy, this way your not gossiping, and your making sure that something happens about this.
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i have four best friends and all five of us hang out in a group all the time. two of them are guys and two of them are girls. anyway when one of the guys isn't with us my other friends talk about how they think the guy who is gone is gay. (i know for a fact that he isn't because i've done stuff with him and no one knows...) but it really doesn't matter if he is or not i just don't think it's right that they do this. should i tell my guy friend what everyone else is saying about him...or would that just cause trouble? (link)
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There are two ways you can approach this situation one way is to confront your other friends i'm not saying you should spill the beans about what you to did, just say i don't think he's gay but you guys don't know and talking about people behind their back is mean, if that is not the path you want to take you can approach this guy and say i don't think you're gay but there are some people who do, but this confrontation can be a tough one be gentle but not too gentle you don't want to put him on the defensive, and make sure that he knows you think he's great the way he is so he shouldn't change himself just so they stop talking.
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For about a year now me and my step sister have not been on the greatest of terms. we used to be really good freinds until middle school came along and she turned in to the snobby prep i couldn't even talk to. I feel like she doesn't treat me as a freind but more like her enemie i think it might be because o f my changes to with freinds and hobbbies we have grown apart i need help on finding out how to make that freindship agian (link)
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Find a movie you both love and suggest to watch it together, did something interesting happen recently talk to her about it, see her reading a cool book ask her about it. And although she might be acting snobby to you i know she loves you try telling her how you feel, "i miss u" is one of my favorite phrases, maybe she feels that you've changed and don't want to be with her either.
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15/f [it only looks long because i put spaces.] BUT STILL, PLEASEEEE answer. please. i need your opinionin. even if its just a yes or a no. ill ratee.
so, me and this boy were like best friends,and then, he liked me or something, and i dont know, i basically rejected him. it was realllyyy bad. so we didnt talk anymore, and each passing day, makes me miss him more and more. and whenever i see him, hes always staring at me. always. like sometimes he'll try to sneak looks [this is what all my friends say] his friends are always looking at me. [but there not like laughing or anything, there just staring.] and sometimes he'll look me straight in the eye. and we'll be staring into eachothers eyes, which seems like forever. my one guy friend, said he thinks that he misses me, and he wants to talk to me, but hes embarrassed that i rejected him.
DO YOU AGREE? yes or no.
and should i talk to him? yes or no. (link)
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It sounds like yes you should talk to him, but first you need to talk to yourself are you positive you don't like him as more than a friend. And if you just like him as a friend you have to remember that he really liked you, he put his feelings out there and he got turned down he might want to still be friends with you but his heart, self esteem, and courage have to mend, remember to handle this situation gently and with care.
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im friends with two girls who are best friends, stacey and olivia. i met olivia through stacey, and lately i have been hanging out with olivia pretty often. the two are still best friends, though. i don't have a problem with it. stacey called me and wanted to go to a movie, but i said i couldn't because i already made plans with olivia, which i did. she got annoyed. does she have a right to be upset with me because i made plans with her best friend? i invited her, too, but she was mad that i didn't want to do what she was doing. (link)
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It's not your fault for making plans with her friend, maybe you shouldn't have said i alreayd have plans with olivia you could have just said sorry i'm busy, but you have to think about this is she mad at you for not doing what she wanted to do, olivia for making plans with you instead, you for choosing olivia over her olivia for choosing you over her, there's only one way to find out i suggest you all talk.
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My best friend talks to this guy online from a town near ours (she met him after she started talking to him online). In short, he's horrible for her.
Why? Well, he does drugs, for one (he has pictures of him doing drugs on his MySpace, too). Not only that, he's told my friend that doing drugs isn't harmful (she knows it IS harmful) and that she should try them. He says that he uses drugs to deal with his mother's death. He's also older, so that makes me question his intentions.
She tells me that she won't go out with him, but since another guy she talked to got a girlfriend, I think she's changed her mind. He sends her cute texts and everything, and I think that's making her blind to all of his faults.
In a nutshell, I care about my friend and I KNOW she deserves better. What should I do?
Thanks in advance to all who read this and answer. (link)
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Your friend knows you love her, and somewhere deep down she knows what you're saying is right, but she's blinded by lust, as i've told other people sometimes all you can do is point people in the right direction, books, movies, t.v. shows can all be helpful, if you tell her parent she'llmost definitely get mad at you and you may lose her trust but if nothing else works you have to tell her parents, she might be mad at you at first but eventually she'll realize you're right, and her trust for you will slowly heal, just think about would you rather a mindless druggie as a friend because this guy is going to get her hooked and then dump her, because even though your friend might think she's impenetrable to the bad influences she is talking to him isn't she and she knows what he does, everybody makes mistakes but they can't get out of them by themselves
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hey everybody. well my friend who I'll call Hannah who I met in fifth grade and I were super close. We had the same best friends. Then in sixth grade Hannah moved into her moms house in a different and deserted all of us completely. She made new friends which is normal but then she forgot about us except for one girl who I'll call Emma that I'm not even friends with. Now we're all going into eight grade and Hannah might be moving back. My friends are all going to forgive her with the exeption of my best friend Rachel but she'll probably forgive her pretty quick cause shes to nice to hold a grudge. I don't know what to do cause I'm still really hurt about her forgetting about us so is it totally wrong of me to not want to forgive her without at least an apoligy. I mean do you really think it would be normal for us to just go back to being best friends after all that has happened. I didn't find out from her that she might be moving back, I found out from another girl in her town! Any help would be great. Sorry it's so long ♥ (link)
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First off don't be mean to her, but that doens't mean you have to rush back to her side. And although she deserted you she might not have meant to and don't expect that she's mean. Just think to yourself how much of an effort did you make to keep in contact with her, maybe this "emma" girl did make a big effort. Start off fresh see if you still share interests ad once you've planted that base again tell her how you feel
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ok...im 13 and so is my friend..but she has some..well..problems..heres how it goes..a few weeks ago i saw my best friend that i hadn't seen in 3 years..she ended up staying the night at my house a whole week two weeks later..she told me everything that happened since we had last seen eachother..she told me that she used to cut herself and had an eating disorder and she still did it once and a while..im worried that she might end up harming herself..she told me she had it under control but i dont beleive her..she said that it was addictive and i dont know what to do..i told her that i wouldnt tell no body so im not going to..so please dont tell me to tell someone..if you could send me some websites for her to look at or something like that it would be a LOT of help...or even give me a few things i could say to her..i plan on telling her how i feel next time i see her..but i need something more..help! (link)
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What is your friend interested in reading, watching television, movies, maybe you can recommend a book, tv show, or movie you enjoyed which relates to this topic and how to deal with it, although telling her how you feel is a great idea don't say it all at once because if you do you might scare her or make her go all defensive, and remember she told you this which means she trusts you a lot.
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my best friend left for summer camp yesterday and shes gonna be gone a week. when i say best friend mean it. we do everything together. i went on vaca with her i sleep over her house almost every night. im with her all day 9am to about 11pm everynight we have a fire and stuff with mores. and now shes gone for the week i wrote her a letter and sent it today with smoes in it.lol. buyt im bored out of my mind. does anyone know something i could do to passs the week MUCH MUCH quicker? (link)
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I'm not saying you should forget about bff, but try something knew whether it's sports, pets, buisness schemes, arts, this way your not bored anymore. She's having a good time so why shouldn't you, and remember a week is only seven days so try something new and if it doesn't work out when she comes back home you can always go back to the norm
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I have a best friend, he says to me yesterday the smallest thing that made me mad.. the way I eat my icecream. I know this sounds weird but I was upset. I talked to him but he said he couldnt take my mood swings. What's some advice about not switching moods. I know this is dumb but I would really like a good response
Thanks.. (link)
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Mood Swings get the best of us, but sometimes the best thing to do is take deep breaths, maybe you have a favorite song that always puts you in a good mood, play it or just sing it in your head. And one of the best remedies i know is a smile, sometimes when you smile you can't help but be in a good mood. Just do what makes you happy, and stop and don't stress or freak out
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