I'm a third year psychology student and i love giving advice to those who are in need of it but if you ask me a stupid question you should expect a stupid answer i love hanging out with friends and socialising i can be really conceited at times and if you get on my bad side you might wanna sleep with an eye open!
Altogether I would say that I am still finding myself and my place in this huge world, searching for the great amor and visiting beautiful places
so guys feel free to ask me anything that's on your mind and I will try to give you the most helpful advice
Gender: Female
Location: south africa
Occupation: student
Age: 21
Member Since: September 23, 2010
Answers: 260
Last Update: October 22, 2020
Visitors: 19592
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I have been going through a really tough time. My serious relationship of 3 yeas ended. The guy ditched me just before marriage. This my 3rd relationship failure. I'm 32. People around me are getting married and kids. I don't have many friends. I'm alone ans cry everyday. My confidence is shaking. I don't hv anyone to share my deepest feelings. I regret many things in life. I feel anxiety thinking about
Read more: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=666294#ixzz6HK8mB7m2 (link)
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I feel like you ended up in my inbox for a reason. I'd swear this is me writing to me two years ago. Eight years, engaged and my fiancé called it off.
I'm sorry for what you're going through, I know it's especially hard if you have nobody to talk to about it. 3 years is a really long time to work through. I know this is cliché, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You have to allow yourself this time to heal. Cry as much as you need, tears carry sadness.
You probably feel like you're never going to smile again, or that you don't know how to be alone, but trust me it does get better. This is one of those tough parts of life that you just have to go through in order to be moulded into someone different. Get ready to find yourself and love yourself after you deal with this emotional burden. If you feel the need, get a rebound, it really does help.
Try new things, for me it's now cooking and gardening, I also quit smoking and I felt so accomplished having done something good through the difficult times. Talk about your feelings as much as you can. Don't ignore them or they'll come back to haunt you. The reality is that the only thing that will help you is TIME. Go through it and get over it, I promise you will look back as a new person.
Please try and reach out to old friends and family who can keep you company and try your best not to contact him. When you don't, he will call you or try to reach you, don't give in. Remember the feelings you've felt. Write yourself a note today on how you feel and what feelings you want to get rid off, then throw it away, this is called a "mind clutter box" and will help you forget what's surrounding your mind.
In the mean time, please address your feelings and know that most people have gone through this atleast once and that you're not alone. Invest the negative energy into something productive and become someone completely new. I hope you feel better and I'm here should you need to talk. If you can't reach me here you can mail me at Nikz.g9@gmail.com
Take care and be strong
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It’s ok if he moves on and is in a relationship but its not ok for me to do it? I’m not saying I let him get involved in my life but my question is what can i do for him to stop/protect myself. (I actually don't let him get involved. He finds out this info and I only tell a small amount of people, and then he has his "buddies" figure out who the guy I am seeing is)
He has been dating a girl for three years they also plan to get married next month. However when a man tries to enter my life or tries to date me he doesn’t like it and goes and messes it up. (By talking crap about me, by hitting or going up to a guy who shows interest in me) (I also haven’t seen him in 5 years and this past summer was my first time seeing him again). I confronted him about our past relationship since we were so toxic and he said to me "I still love you but I can't be with you because I already promised another girl that I would marry her"
If it also helps he has anger issues like very bad anger issues and in the past has hit my ex boyfriend. The reason why he hit my ex boyfriend was because he found out him and i were seeing each other, He went up to my ex and asked him "What's between you and Tara" my boyfriend at that time replied "I love her" and he punched him for saying that, He also had my cousin spy on us. Also tried another time to beat up my boyfriend at that time by trying to take him somewhere far so he can beat him and my boyfriend got away.
I was also talking to his cousin once on Facebook and we just had normal "Hey, How are you" conversations and I wake up one day and see that he has blocked me for no reason. I believe that reason was because of my ex. But I now have been dating someone else and he doesn't know and i intend to keep it that way.I plan on moving back to the state he's in because my family and friends live there.
Do you guys think this behavior will stop when he gets married and has kids? Why is he still doing this? Advice please? (link)
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The way i see it, he does not want you to move on. when two people break up there is an invisible competitiveness that takes place to see which person is happier without the other. He is in another relationship so he should not be involved in your personal life. your ex is a person that you cut out of your life because it never worked out unless you agreed to remain friends. This is truly unhealthy for you and you should try your best to cut off all contact with him unless you still have feelings for him. Threaten to tell his fiance' if he does not stop invading your privacy. He has absolutely no business meddling in your life and he wants to make sure that you remain unhappy. i dont think you should be bothered about whether or not his behavior will change, by you giving him attention he has already won and will continue to ruin your relationships if you do not leave him in the past. I think it would be wise to not interact with his family so often as it gives him leverage to call your family and question your whereabouts. You should explain his irrational behavior to your new partner so that he does not interfere. Slowly but surely, once he realises you dont have time for him and have moved on, he will do the same
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Why would he ask me, am I your darling? With a tears of joy emoji because I call my good friends by darling mostly rather than their names and it's just natural. After we texted each other for few minutes I said OK darling and he texted back asking am I your darling with an emoticon, I said yes why not, and he sends me a jazz hands emoji, (I think it's an offering hug emoji) as I looked up on Internet. I call him darling now and then. He's a good friend. We get on well and go to same college. I like him. So my question is why the emojis and asking back if he's my darling? Thanks! (link)
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Story short, your friend is into you. He is searching for confirmation that you feel the same way about him. I suggest asking him indirectly, how his love life is going, whether he is into anybody. You'd get your answer from that, but if you don't feel the same i suggest you just let it be.
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So there's this guy I've been crushing on so hard for the past while now. I'm in the US and he's in... Australia (fml). I really like him. Don't know if he sees me the same way. People think I'm crazy. But I was gonna like take it REALLY slow, get to know him a lot then tell him if I still like him as much or even more. Because if you truly like someone and want to be with them, it doesn't matter the distance, how much time you have with them, or how long it'll take to meet them, right? Btw, he said he's going to move to the UK or US when he graduates university. So there's a good chance with that, right? (link)
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I know you may feel that this is the only option right now, but trust me when I say that in a few months you're really not going to care. A long distance relationship requires a lot of maintenance and lets not forget that it's in another country! This guy, I'm sorry to say, will eventually meet somebody, especially because he doesn't know you're feelings, he might find it rather odd too, and you're only going to be heart broken. Move on and meet other guys and when you find the one for you, you're going to look back at this and laugh
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'fingering girl, may have precum on finger, but girl took ipill after the incident....will she be pregnant? (link)
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Although it's possible to get pregnant from pre ejaculation, the chances are not extremely high. If she took the pill, then you're fine, it's unlikely that she will become pregnant
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i liked this girl i started dating who i thought was an innocent girl. in fact i didn't even try to kiss her until the third date because of how innocent i thought she was. well the thing is after i kissed her and don't ask me why we started talking about sexual experiences ( i thought she had practically none so what did i have to fear). well i found out she is what is known as a virgin slut or virgin whore, a girl who is still a virgin but has kissed around 40 guys and had blown off 4 guys just because she was horny and returning the favor after they had sucked her off.
i feel a little disgusted with the horny attitude with random guys in the past and don't know what i should think.
anyway, she is leaving the country for a year so we broke up but still talk as friends. we only kissed so i didn't even get blown off myself but she is going to do some religion studies outside the country, meaning no more sex life for at least that year (no kissing, no nothing). the thing is she went to Aruba as her last opportunity to party and i hate the feeling i get when i think about the certainty of she kissing at least a couple of guys a night (which really doesn't bother me that much)and the possibility of she sucking a guy off just because she is horny (that one does bother me).
i know this inst exactly a question but i need counsel from someone.
thanks in advance. (link)
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Well, you say that you guys have broken up, so why does this still bother you? She is going away for a year and im certain that in that time you are going to forget these feelings. The truth is that you are just disappointed in yourself for not realizing sooner the kind of person that she truly is, and I'm sure you would not want to make her your girlfriend. So let it go, everybody makes mistakes and you just kissed, you'll eventually find somebody that you are in sync with, and I don't think that this is the girl for you. Maybe it's best you don't speak to her as much as you do now? That might ease the situation, just remember that you have done nothing wrong and you should feel proudly about it.
All the best dear!
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Jist of what happened in the past
- I liked his best friend, same college
- We met and even though things got messed up ended up liking each other
- Started dating when he passed out (im still doing my undergrad)
- we have been dating a year. I'm 19 he's 22
- our parents know about us and we have met both sides
- we met in college and then he passed out and started giving exams
- he couldn't clear the exams he gave so his parents got paranoid about him going on the wrong path or getting distracted because of me
- he promised his mom hed clear the last exam for us to prove to her he can do something
- he started working with this ngo in town so we would see each very often
- our friends knew and he even told his best buds that he'd marry me if we continue dating for a while
- we never had any problems even though he is a bit flirtatious with other women he was loyal to me
- Had a few fights because of the guys friends I had but it was all sorted out
A week back since I'm on vacation across the country he texted me saying that his result came out and he didn't clear it so he had to break up to concentrate on his career
He said he still loved me but he had to let this go since we were mad about each other. He said he hoped we got back together but couldn't promise anything for the future and didn't want to give me false hopes.
He said I was the best thing that happened to him. He also said his parents raised him and he needs to make them proud by achieving something in life and hence he needs to give up all the distractions in his life.
Its been a week and he wouldn't answer any of my calls or messages and has completely cut off. He told his friends he called it off and didn't give a reason and he wouldn't reply back to my friends at all.
I don't know what to do. I want him back because I love him even if it involves waiting but I don't know what is going on in his mind. I am also scared out of stupidity hed go any do something really reckless to get over me.
I don't know what to say to him when we meet when I get back but I am willing to do anything to rectify this. Do you have any advice as to why this happened and it could truly get him back? Or am I living in a dream world where fairytales exist and he is truly over me? (link)
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I hate to be the bearer of bad news but from what you're telling me, it's pretty clear that he's over you. I don't buy the whole story about the exam being in the way, this guy seems to be keeping his options open knowing he can always turn to you, he's basically stringing you along for no reason and that will never end until you end it. You're not going to jeopardize his grades and if he loved you he could compromise. I understand it's really tough, but nobody deserves to go through that, once you realize that he's no good for you, you'll understand how he acted and that you shouldn't have wasted anymore time. One day you'll find somebody special but I'm sorry hun this guy isn't him.
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Once I have anal sex and it didn't slipper to my vagina, am I still a virgin? (Stressed) (link)
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Yes you are. You're only a virgin until your hymen is broken which is located in the vagina
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I like this girl and i asked her to the upcoming dance, she responded saying "i love u!!" is it a kind rejection or a acception? girls, HELP!! (link)
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Well it sounds like she's been waiting a really long time for you to ask her so its a definite yes
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est ce que le baiser d'amour peut-il rendre une femme enceinte ?????
:'( je veux une réponse svp !! (link)
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I'm sorry I speak english only
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hi nikz i need your help there is a guy at school [ also im 11] that i like a lot he is 12 and we to same afterschools as well so i see him everyday . He knows i like him all because of my stupid classmates . how do i make him like me . Help me please im really desperate for help ....... (link)
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well you see its going to be a bit difficult now considering the whole class knows and its kind of embarassing for him. The key here is patience dear, you see him everyday so that's a good thing, you need to start of being friends with him, let him get to know you personally and he'll do the rest from there. Then when you two are comfortable with with each other you can raise the question, ask him what he likes in a girl and if he would ever consider dating a friend. Right now you can't expect him to like you immediately, but it will be a lot more easier for you because he already knows that you like him. Once you are friends with him, inbox me and i'll let you know how to go about doing it
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I have a boyfriend that i have been with for a year, but he has always been controlling and i went out with him shortly after i got out of a 2 year relationship. Throughout the relationship i am in right now my mind has always went back to the other relationship. It ended so randomly. It has been so hard to deal with the whole time. I'm sure people will just say stay with the bf you have ,but honeslty i don't want to be stuck with him for the rest of my life.I wouldn't get in a relationship right after but i really want to be with the guy from the past. It's hard to explain, sorry this is so confusing. I just need help now. (link)
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I think what's happened here is that you used your current boyfriend as a rebound to get over your last boyfriend. Now you say that you don't want to spend your life with him, so what is the use continuing this relationship? It is very hard to get over someone that you have been with for two years and you got into this relationship too fast and unconciously what you're probably doing is comparing your current boyfriend to the old one and that's what's making you miss him. If your ex still has feelings for you you should try to resolve your relationship, if not. You really need to leave this guy you're with as he's under another impression and that would be playing with his feelings
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How do u get ur bf to be all lovey dovey with you (link)
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call him babe and be all lovey dovey, he'll do the same
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I am 19 years old sri lankan girl and my boyfriend is 20 years old. How i kiss my boyfriend's lips first time? (link)
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you wait till the mood is right and there's nobody around then you wait for things to get silent then gently pull his face towards yours, look him in the eyes and kiss him softly and he will lead
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What do you do when a guy you've liked for a long time rejects you when you tell him you love him, but when he gets a girlfriend (AND IS CHEATING ON HER WITH ANOTHER GIRL), he hits on you? (He hugs you after you tell him he's being stupid and says he loves you) What do you do? Do you react negatively or neutrally? I will NOT react positively, ever. Please don't judge me. If you want to know with more detail, please let me know at melanielovesdylanobrien@gmail.com
Thanks to everyone for answering in advance :D (link)
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this guy is a wannabe playa, do yourself a favour and stay away he's only going to hurt you
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I bumped into this girl who i knew of back in high school but we never realIy hung out or talked, anyway so i got her number and i called her the following week and talked to her but didnt ask her out. then i called her twice more after but both phone calls were short because she said she was busy doing things. So at that point I thought she was not interested at all, then a few days later I got this text " sorry for being so short on the phone with you when you called, but I have been really busy.i will message you if and when my schedule frees u. Have a good one". So is she interested or she's just being friendly? What should I do? (link)
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well the fact that you never really knew her would make it kind of awkward to hold a conversation which is probably why she texted you instead of calling. From what i gather i just think that both times she didn't really know what to say on the phone so she said shes's busy. I think you should give it some time then definitely call her again and judge from that conversation, say hey i hope you won't be too busy because i'd really love to take you out. Truth is you'll never know if she's interested until you ask
best of luck
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This guy told his friend who told me that in gym he kept trying to hit my butt(which is very popular with the guys in my grade(8th) with a doge ball to see it jiggle. ? why does he want this and what should i do? (link)
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guys that age are still learning new things and are really immature. This is wrong too and he shouldn't be doing it, tell him to stop. He probably isn't getting enough girl attention and just wants to bother you
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hi guys, i've been dating a guy who is in late 40's and i'm in early 30's for a 1 year and a half. he has a daughter age of 5 with his ex girlfriend who just lives about half and hours away from we live. we love each other and also he never stops saying his daughter is main priority. i'm confused sometimes as i want to be with him and he says the same but i don't know, guys. i do not know what he's thinking. so, is he worth to date as he's a single father. thanks you. (link)
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Yes he certainly is I mean he is a normal guy, just that he would always see his daughter as number one because its his blood family that he has, so why not, you love him and he loves you, its normal for a single parent to say these things as they worry about their kids first, he loves his daughter and he loves you differently, but you have nothing to worry about, best of luck
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me and this one boy are like really close friends family as he says .we went together for about a year i known him for a three and so we was on the phone the other day and this other guy kept texting me so i became frustrated and he asked me what was going on and i told him that this one guy gets like so jeasouls of certain things and the boy aka ma ex he said did i want him to call the jeaslous boy and curse him out .now my question is do that mean that he still have feelings for me ???? (link)
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It doesn't necessarily mean that he has feelings for you, it just that he probably cares about you like any guy friend would do, since you haven't given a lot of details about your ex its hard to tell whether he still has feelings for you, the only person who can answer this is him but I wouldn't give it too much thought, he's just looking out for you
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o.k. so my boyfriend calls me hotie but i cant come up with a cute name like that for him. hes girl before me called him cutie should i use that. his name is greg but i want something that ends in "ie". we are both 13. (link)
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gregie, sweetie, baby, lovie, honey,
there isn't that many that ends in "ie"
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