After year and a half of being together my boyfriend got me a promise ring... except he didnt offer a promise in any way... i picked the ring out he paid for it and handed me the bag didnt tell me he loved me or anything. I gave him the ring back and it just seems like he isnt trying to make anything better at all.. what shoud i do?
ask him if he bought you it because you wanted it or if he intended to actually promise something. if he didn't, then why wear it? make a promise or return it. put some meaning to it so that way you can keep it and be happy you have it.
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I'm fifteen, sophomore. It's been five months since me and this guy I dated for seven months broke up. He was my first boyfriend, first kiss, fingering, hj, and bj... It was a really unhealthy relationship and a super long story but to sum it all up, he really hurt me. He became sooo much a part of me that when we broke up I felt like I had nothing to distinguish myself with anymore. Even now, he doesn't even feel like a person to me, more like a whole part of myself. But its an empty space... We don't talk. Hang out. Nothing. But I still think about him every single day. I sometimes still cry over him... It's just wierd. Because even thoguh I hate him for all the pain and betrayl he put me through I miss him like crazy. And I feel like a different person now that he's gone... And I hate it. I want it to go away SO bad. I just don't understand. It took him days to move on. It's been five months and I'm still hurting. Whats wrong with me??
you actually have to TRY to move on... i know it's tough but if you actually try to then it'll work within time. remember, time heals everything. you have to be willing to. go hang out with your friends as much as possible. meet new fun people. all i know is that being with your friends as much as possible helps prevent the pain a little (actually, a lot) more. keep yourself occupied and eventually he'll be behind you, but remember: you have to WANT to otherwise you just won't be able to move on from it.
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Okay to start things off I am an 18 year old female.
Sorry this is long but i just don't know what to do.
So i cant really explain my emotions through text but here it goes. I dated this guy for 8 months. he took my virginity. we spent everysingle day together, we even spent nights together. i pretty much lived at his house. we became SUPER SUPER close and comfortable with eachother like best friends. we would take showers together. i would go pee while he brushed his teeth. i loved how close we were. i loved this boy with everything. all of my heart. and then the day before yesterday through text he tells me he just doesnt feel that spark anymore and broke up with me.
idk what to do with myself. i still love him so much. i feel so horrible to know i love him with everything and he doesnt want me back.
i had so much planned for us. i was looking forward to spending our first christmas together and halloween. we had actually told each other we were gonna be together forever and talked about in the future getting married and having kids. he told me i was the girl he wanted to marry.
i have never found someone to be as cute in my eyes as he was. i loved everything about his personality.
everyone says i will get over him but i just dont see how. i mean sure i see other cute guys but nobody compares.
im am so terrified i will not get over him and i will be unhappy forever.
i understand im young and you all probably believe that i dont understand what love is but i do i promise you i do.
so i guess what im asking is how can i get over this? has anyone ever thought a break up was the end of the world, but got over it and now is in a happy relationship where they love the guy more?
i feel so horrible and not good enough. i just want to curl up into a ball and rot away.
oh geez, can i relate!
i went out with my boyfriend of 11 months (who also took my virginity), and we were exactly as comfortable as you described. i was at his house every day, slept over all the time, even went on family vacations. i imagined my whole life with him. we picked out our kids' names and decided where we were gonna live. hell, my username on here is our initials put together... i never got around to making another one, obviosuly haha. but we were so comfortable around each other it was almost scary.
we broke up. it was me, though, who broke up with him, so i'm coming from the other end here. believe me, i still cared, so i'm sure he does. i didn't feel the spark with my boyfriend anymore either but if i could, i would go back out with him just because a huge amount of time was put between us and i believe things will be different. but i assure you, you will get over him and he'll get over you. you guys probably won't be able to be friends without it being awkward, but who says that later on you guys can't happen again? who said that spark can't be rekindled? it's very possible, it's happened before.
but as for getting over. i was over him months ago, and so was he. we just had time apart. we tried other people. i broke his heart, i really did, with no intentions. i wanted to help him but i couldnt because we needed to be apart. he would try to win me back several ways. letters, promising he'd change, buying me lots of things for christmas... but maybe all you need is time. maybe you need to talk this out with your guy. but we were crazy about each other, but we've both moved on and we broke up 9 months ago. we havent talked in 6 months and even before that we were almost over each other. it just takes time, which sucks, i know, but it heals everything.
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I've been with this guy for three years. If his heart stopped beating right now I would give him mine. When he asked me to marry him all I could think of was yes. We're both young, but I love him so much and I just couldn't picture myself with anyone else. I started college a couple months ago and I met this other guy. I've noticed signs that he likes me. He's said that he wishes I was single. He helps me with my homework. He walks me to my car when it's dark. I appreciate this especially because my fiance isn't there to do these things. He goes to a different college. There are so many days that I wonder what it would be like to be with this other guy. I know that I can't because (1) I'm engaged! (2)This other guy is a temporary research student and next week he will go back to his college... which is across the country! Still so many nights I have bad dreams and fantasies. I can't get good sleep. My fiance used to be the first man I thought of when I woke up and I feel horrible because he isn't now. I've talked with him about this and he is trying to do everything he can to make me happy and it does help. But, these wandering thoughts are still inside my head. And, I don't wanna marry someone if I'm not 100 percent sure anymore. What should I do???
If youre not 100 percent sure anymore, hold off on the marriage. Im not sure when or if you were even planning that at the moment, but thats all you can do for now cause i'm sure you don't want to break it off with your fiance for good for something so minor.
its a good thing you talked to your fiance about this. youre not hiding anything and it shows you do truly love him, clueing him in on something you know if hurting him but it's the truth.
this boy is very temporary, from what it looks like. i know it's stupid to compare, but if you've ever heard of the show Hannah Montana, there was one episode where she was caught between her long-term boyfriend & a boy she'd met on her own time that just seemed perfect and new to her. she didn't know which one to choose, but in the end, chose the long-term boy.
i know that's not the BEST comparison, but it is ONE, haha.
remember... you love your fiance. this boy, although the feelings are there, doesnt know you like your fiance does. it's very normal to be attracted to another guy. i know i was while i was with my boyfriend of a year. i started to think of other guys.
are you bored in your current relationship? whether you are or not, some things that may help change your mind and keep your mind on your fiance, is going out and doing something new together or something that is very special. i'm not talking pizza then movies. something new, something sincere, something sweet. you can ask your parents or friends for any suggestions. i'm hoping that from this it will help you realize how positive you can be again about your fiance that you once were.
this other guy, however, must know that youre engaged, right? in a way, its almost disrespectful that he tells you he wishes you were single & spends this time with you, probably in hopes of something happening. i know, it's a taste of something new. but he is temporary & like you said, hes leaving to go to his college across the country. i know youll miss him, because he was practically there for you during the days your fiance couldn't be! it's absolutely normal. maybe you miss your fiance and anyone who treats you the way he does when hes not around makes you feel a lot better inside.
im sorry that was so long, but i hope it helped somewhat. good luck!
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I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months and last time we talked I cahnged it to a break because I still love him. I can't stop thinking about him and he won't answer or return my phone calls. He does work a lot...its a VERY crazy schedule. I made him a little slideshow of pictures of us...not sure if I'm going to send it to him. I was thinking of sending it to him.
What can I do? I want to talk to him and I miss him like crazy. HELP PLEASE!! :(
you NEED to make sure if youre going to tell him you made a mistake and you want him back that youre not gonna be playing this game with him.
no more on and off break ups and taking breaks. and id move fast before he realizes that you could easily do it again and doesnt want to be with you anymore.
you need to approach him calmly. like, "hey, can we talk? so, i was thinking, i was really out of line... i needed this time to think and i hope i can make it up to you."
just dont make this continual. im not sure how close you guys are but i did this with my last boyfriend and when i asked for him back, he said to forget it because i was playing too many games and he liked being single better.
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15/f
My boyfriend and I are going to have sex and when I told him I had just gotten on the pill, the first thing he says is how excited he is because he won't have to use a condom. When he said this, I had no idea how to respond because I've always been under the impression that with sex, a condom is ALWAYS a must for protection. My first time was last winter break when I was raped. Since then, I've been tested (clean) and only had safe-sex once with my current boyfriend. I know the fact that I'm having sex with my boyfriend at such a young age may seem "slutty" after such a short period of time but being raped, I never thought I'd have any desire to have sex again. Plus, now that I've done it, I'm much more open to it. But, I'm not sure how open I am to sex without a condom. He's 18 and I'm his first and we're currently not seeing anyone else....I just don't know what to think about sex without a condom. I want this to be special but I'm just not sure. Because I'm his first and we're both clean, sex without a condom shouldnt have any risk.....right?
Please please please use a condom.
My friend was on the pill AND a condom. He didn't pull out and she got pregnant.
I know it's stupid, to be on the pill & have to use a condom and pull out, but that's the safest way to do it. With my ex, I did that every time for 8 months and never had a pregnancy scare.
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So me and this guy went out for 2 months, we knew eachother for 2 years almost 3 before we started going out. Just a couple weeks ago though he broke up with me because his friends were telling him i was flirting with them, which is complete bs. I left him alone for a week then talked to him about it. I told him the story which is that his friend was flirting with me and would do stuff like not let me go and say i can fuck you better than your boyfriend, so basicly rude disrespectful things. I couldn't ever get away from him so i would just smile and say anything to get away. I know that sounds bad but its cause hes my ex-boyfriends friend and i didnt wanna be the reason they werent friends anymore. Well i told him that and he will not believe me because another one of his friends told him some more bs. Hes all mad at me and i got one of my friends to tell him they were lieing but hes just not believeing anyone. I dont know what to do i love him and just before all this he finially told me he loved me to. This whole thing is stupid its not like i cheated on him. How do i get him to believe me or take me back?
if i were you, i'd tell him i'm BEYOND serious about this.
however, since he's refusing to believe you while you tell your side of the story, it may mean he's using that as an excuse to break up with you in the first place...
you could talk to his friend and tell him it's his fault your relationship got ruined, and he should fess up to your ex. although he won't. but at least you can tell your ex you went out of your way to talk to his friend and tell him youre angry about this.
i doubt your ex would think you'd go that much out of your way if you were really lying...
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15/f
this is a VERY long story, but im gonna try to lay this out as short as possible and please, im desperate here, you have NO clue what i've been through these past few months, and i need all the help i can get..
last year i met a REALLY sensative guy. he was 16, about to be 17, and i was 14.. he was soooo shy, hes VERY insecure. when we first started dating, all he said to me was how i saved him and pulled him out of his misery because he has had no luck with relationships and was treated like shit by girls his whole life. hes not even that cute and popular, and i have a waaay higher social status in my grade/ school then he does in his grade.. but ive been known to have wierd taste and i can look beyond looks and things like that very easily. i think when we first started dating him i was just excited over the fact that he had a car and he was a junior and i was only a freshmen.. but i actually did end up falling in love with him. and he was COMPLETELY in love with me. we lost our virginities to eachother and ill tell you, im smart, and not at all a bit naiive.. i knew this kid loved me. & we did NOT have a sex based relationship whatsoever.. we became eachothers best friends. both of us lost all of our other friends because we were only with eachother 24-7. he called my mom 'mom' and i did the same with his mom.. we were incredibly close.. and sense he was older, i felt so comftorbal and secure with him, and i went to him with all my problems, and he would help me.. ive been suffering from depression for years and me and my mother never had a good relationship, and my father left me, and i was molested as a baby.. but when i was with him, he made me feel so comftorbal. we told eachother EVERYTHING. and i was postive he was there to stay. he promised me forever every single day. we dated for a year. i messed it up, biggest mistake of my entire life.. he started getting very annoying and up my ass. you know when youre in a bad mood and you just want to be left alone? well he would never leave me alone. he'd be like 'its okay babe i love you' bla bla. all mushy, when i just want to be mad!. i tried talking to him about this many times and all he could say was im sorry i just love you soooo much i cant help it.. all my friends called him whipped cream and everything.. it was BAD. but anyways, one night i was out with my friends the day before a cheer competition, and my ex was there.. and somewhere along the lines, we kissed.. my boyfriends friend was there and told him that if i didnt tell him, he was going to.. i knew he wasnt going to break up with me or anything.. so i told him.. but the thing is.. i think i was looking for a fight with him because our relationship was so boring. when i told him, it pissed me off how he was crying instead of being mad, yelling at me. so i started saying things to make him mad.. i said TERRIBLE things. like i was gonna keep cheating on him because he basically lets me, and how i know i take advantage of him because he trusts me so much but i shouldnt.. and he was like well maybe i have to break up with you then.. and he was like i really dont want to. and i was like fine just do it idont care! yelling at him and stuff.. and then he did. i was thinking we would get back together in a couple weeks.. so after we broke up, we still talked because we obv. still loved eachother and everything. we acted like we were going out, and we even 'hooked up' a few times.. but when he asked me back out, i kept saying no, i wasnt ready.. because the relationship was SOOO akward after we broke up.. he was acting so different. and i knew why. it was because i broke his heart. and i did, bad. so one day after we hooked up, my friend told me that her brother saw my 'boyfriend, x-boyfriend, whatever u wanna call him' at a store.. and he was saying how he was done with me and he was trying to get with this new girl 'leesh'.. i was FURIOUS. i called him up screaming at him asking for all my stuff back and it was over for good and everything. but really, i wanted an appology from him, not my stuff back. btw, i was very remorsful for cheating on him and saying what i said to him, i mustve appologized a million times.. but he didnt say anything, he justgave me all my stuff back and acted like it was nothing.. and then i kept trying to get him back, but he kept rejecting me. i was litterally down on my knees for this kid. until one day i found out he had a girlfriend. not just some girl.. the girl who dates ALL the boys that i date after me.. but thats a whole nother story.. anyways, i was devistated. i couldnt eat, i couldnt talk, i couldnt sleep, i couldnt go to school,, nothing. all i did was cry and cry and cry and cry. i tried talking to him seeing if we could be friends and stuff, but he hates me now. if i send him one text, he shuts his phone off. he goes all different ways in the halls so i dont have to see him in school, he wont even look my way. he saw me practically drown in my own tears and he didnt even care. i wrote him long long letters, i tried everything i could just to be able to talk to him when i need to, so i wouldnt be so hurt about the situation.. now, i have two weeks left of school and im failing 4 classes.. and im an honors student. i DONT fail. its not me. and im grounded because of it, so i cant even go out and try to forget it. its been sense thhe end of february... and still,all i can think about is killing myself.. people say they are heart broken.. but this gives heart broken a new definition. there is litterally a hole in my chest. and i keep getting maaaassive anxiety attacks in class, and i do go to counceling wich is sort of helpful but we mostly talk about my parents.. three days ago, she broke up with him. and he was very upset from what i heard.. he hasnt tried talking to me or anything but i dont know what to do, i want to talk to him but he'll just ignore me.. i love this kid and care about him with my life. today i thought i was going to DIE. it was the last day of school for the seniors. the last time ill EVER see him again. the last time ill ever get to look for him i the halls so i can walk by him.. that was the only time i ever got to see him, and today was my last day. and when i walked by him for the very last time of my life today, he didnt even look at me. it was so painful. he couldnt even have the heart to say bye to me considering im his first love and helll never see me again. i havent been able to stop crying sense i last saw him. i dont even know what to do with my life any more. someone PLEEEEEASE tell me what to do to get him back. ANNYTHING. I AM DESPERATE FOR HELP. we had such a good relationship till i cheated and we Never ever had one fight. but you dont even understand. this kid wouldnt even look at any other girls, deleted all the girls in his phone book, couldnt go an hour without texting me just saying he loved me, couldnt go a day withouth seeing me, brought me flowers randomly, did EVERYTHING for me. how can you love someone so much and go through everything we've been through together, and then just completely shut them out of your life?
i've made huge mistakes like that. he stopped talking to me for 8 months. then again, we did end up going to the same school for the rest of high school.
i think you need to give it a lot of time, maybe the whole summer, then one day at the end of summer, just go visit him .. at his house? and say you wanted to talk. make it casual, etc..
maybe he was afraid that since hes a senior and youre a sophomore, you cant be together as often because he's going to college, maybe?
i understand its so hard. but what you need to do is stay out of your room as often as possible unless you feel confident enough not to cry or break down; you should be out with your friends and meet new people (not saying boys), and just enjoy yourself.
there are plenty of fairs going on since it's june, almost july. bring a friend on a family vacation with you. have a movie night with some close *friends*.
i get that you made a mistake, and like the other user said, you're lucky he talked to you at all. but thats what happens when you love someone.
"we love the ones who hurt us, and we hurt the ones who love us." it happens :/
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When someone asks you "how far have you gone with your BF/GF" I don't get the whole "bases" responce.
Like what does 1st base mean? And 2nd? 3rd? And is there a 4th base?
Thanks! I know I sound stupid but I've been wondering about it.
finally, a question I know the answer to :P
well, like the other person said, it's mainly the same thing. except some people call it "french, feel, finger, fuck." (1, 2, 3, 4).
first is any type of kissing, second is just *feeling* around the body, third is anything oral, and fourth is finally, sex.
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