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I'm facinated with the way things work. I've always been told that I'm creative, and I give good advice, but that isn't the most interesting thing about me. I feel like I'm a deeper person than most people know, and so I'm a volcano of advice. All of my friends/aquaintences come to me in time of need for advice, so I suppose I must be good at it. I'm always looking for something a little bit more complicated even among the simplist of things. I'm overly perceptive and analytical. Feel free to contact me directly with questions through the website.

advice

I want to ask my crush to winter formal creatively. (girls ask guys for this dance)
I have different ideas. Please rate one through ten each idea on how cheesy it is [1 being not at all cheesy, 10 being wow that's cheesy!] And also give me feedback about each idea.

#1: The Guitar Pic Idea. I type "Will you go to winter formal with me?" in small font and print it out and cut it out and glue it onto one side of a guitar pic and put clear nail polish over it so it doesn't look tacky. Then I'd give it to him. (He likes to play guitar.)

#2: Fortune Teller Idea. This is probably most flirtatous. I playfully tell him I've learned palm reading. Ask for his hand and as I move my finger over different lines on his palms, I jokingly make up different predictions like "You will be a famous rockstar." Then I say "Let's see what's in your near future." Then as I look at his palm, I say "I see you going to winter formal with me." And then sincerly look at him and ask, "Would you like to go to winter formal with me?"

#3: Icing On The Cookie Idea. I bake cookies and on one write in icing "Would you like to go to winter formal with me?" (One problem: I've never baked cookies in my life before)

If you have any other ideas they are appreciated. Thanks in advance!

#3 is super cheese like velveeta.

#2 is squeezy cheese.

And # 1 is the best, but good cheese like brie.

Uh, or you could just ask him- better yet, write it on your ass and moon him. But wear boy shorts. haha. Or, write him note and put it in his locker. and spray tons of perfume on it. Or, get him blindfolded by someone else..have someone else tell him he is going to touch you or ask you questions to figure out who wants to go to the dance with him.. and have him guess who you are. In the mean time he will say all the girls names that he wants to ask him. Thats all i got.

I don't have any good ideas for you.

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I've never thought that I flirt that much. But apparently the rest of the world thinks so. I hear it from friends, family, and even my boyfriend! They all tell me that I'm the biggest flirt alive. I can't help it because I think that it's just me being friendly. Well some people have a problem with how "friendly" I am but I don't know how to fix it. When I do flirt, I really don't notice it and it's not like I have a bell in my head that rings whenever I am to remind me. So, any idea on how I can back down on the flirting?

I apparently have the same problem. I honestly think it's bullshit. But, it depends on what you are saying when you are "flirting". If you are being suggestive about sex or showing off your body, or touching people- it can be misconstrued as flirting. Best advice I have is to ask your friends and family (including your boyfriend) to point it out to you when you are doing it. Then you can understand where they are coming from, and if they are full of it or not. I say, keep on being friendly, if it's your best asset.

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Okay here it goes it may be a long one this time..

For starters I'm a 18/f I have been dating this guy he is 22 for 5 1/2 months. On my birthday he asked me to marry him. I said yes. Well that next week when we got home we got into a little argument which is normal and he said u know what i never even fell in love with u. Right when he said that my heart broke. I was totally in love with this guy you know ? Okay so then the next day he loves me again..hes like playing games with me. Well then i get a phone call from this guy i have known since march and had a total crush on well hes looking for a serious relationship and he is like totally falling for me. But i dunno what to do. Should i stay with the guy and fuss and have him play games with me or get to know this other guy ? I so need help !!!!

No, fuck the guy you're with. He obviously doesn't know what love is. Always date up sister, get what you want. Don't break the guy's heart that you are with by telling him you are leaving him for someone else. Be a big person and have a long talk with him about how he doesn't understand what love is if he would play those kinds of games with you. Break up with him. Start dating the other guy, and if that doesn't work out, spend sometime single. : )

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I am 19 years old and my ex-boyfriend is 20. We were together for 2.5 years before I broke up with him. I broke up with him because I had been trying to fix the problems in the relationship, but nothing seemed to be improving. I ended up cheating on him, and that made me realize that something was missing in our relationship that I needed.

Well in the two months that I left him, the guy I cheated on him with, who I had thought was so great, ended up being a liar and breaking my heart. The next guy I was with ended up raping me. Then my family and friends turned on me. Then I lost my job. The one person that has been helping me through this is my ex-boyfriend.

He tried winning me over while we were broken up, but I resisted. Once my life turned to crap, and I realized how good he was to me, I wanted him back too. But that same day, he found out about the cheating, so now we are still broken up. He forgave me for cheating, but he says he needs some time to myself, which I understand. We still see each other every week or so, and so now we are in a friends with benefits sort of relationship. Neither of us is interested in seeing other people, we're just not officially going out.

But today he called me and said that he might be going back home, going off to Europe, in a half a year or so. He doesn't know what he's going to do exactly. He might stay here or he might go. It's so hard waiting for him to come back to me now, so I can't imagine us getting back together and me getting used to having him around all the time again, then having to deal with him being gone for 6 months or longer. He promised me that if he left, he would come back here for me, but I don't know if I can live with that burden.

It's so hard to deal with. If I hadn't gone through all this trauma, I think I'd probably be thinking about this differently. But he is seriously the only person in my life who I deeply love and care for. He loves me deeply as well. The only thing is, is love enough? We both love each other, but I don't think we're "in love." But after dealing with such horrible people, I can not imagine me ever looking at anyone else. He is the person I trust to be with me through thick in thin, despite of our petty relationship problems. Is it so bad to be with someone for security, companionship, familiarity, and not because you're "in love?" He has done 10x more for me than anyone else in my life.

From reading your question I get the feeling that you are depressed. I could be wrong, but in the midst of all of your problems he might look better than he actually is. My advice is to make things right with yourself first.

It's a very mature thing to differentiate between love and in love. I agree with you there. But to have friendly love, or brotherly love (even with benefits) is to care deeply, and this love doesn't know distance. I mean that, my brother who I care deeply for, may go to college in another state, which I would want because I love him. I know that we will always be together in spirit, and thank god for technology because there is such thing as e-mail and the telephone.

I don't think that you are considering the future right now. If what is best for the both of you, which it sounds like it is, to be broken up, then so be it. If you cannot mend things romantically, and I wouldn't try because you shouldn't cheat on eachother, then be friends.

I have friends I talk to every six months and we don't get any further apart because of the time. My best friend is an ex-boyfriend, who introduces me to all of his girlfriends to get my approval. We are like brother and sister now. I really like it that way, we didn't mesh romantically.

So lastly, you might think about counseling. You don't want your past experiences, bad relationships and rape, to interfere with developing long lasting, healthy relationships in the future. Plus, you have to love yourself and your circumstances in order to give and recieve love or care from other people.

I agree with your statement about "if you hadn't gone through this trauma, you would be thinking about this differently". Establish a healthy state of mind, so you have good relationships as reference.

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christmas is coming soon and I need some ideas on what to get my boyfriend for christmas. I'm thinking about getting him a hat and a matching shirt for christmas in his fav color green, but I don't not sure. I NEED HELP!!

Go to zumiez, they have really nice cool clothes, and not just for skaters or snowboarders. If you were interested in getting him a shirt then match his style. If you were to get a hat, same thing, maybe a matching scarf. Other good ideas: if he has a hobby get him something related. Like if he's into art, a nice pen and ink set. If he's into sports get tickets. Music, go to a show. Take him out on a date- pay for dinner at a nice restaurant. Cheap gifts: take him for a picnic or to a special spot- take candles and cocoa and read a poem. Get an autograph. Draw a picture.

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Would you take offense if your gf/bf said that although they find you attractive, they would never want to see a "Picture" of you, or see you in your underwear? I'm sure you can guess of what nature.

My gf said this to me and I felt offended. I don't really know why. I guess it's no big deal, really. We were only kidding around and she said that. I'm pretty insecure about my looks, which doesn't help I suppose. So would you take offense, or am I making a big deal?

In response to your response. If she is religious she has probably been told that it is wrong to see someone else naked. I dated a guy for two years that was orthodox jewish and he was terrified of anything sexual. He wanted to stay a virgin until he was married. So psycologically speaking he created an aversion to sex in his mind, so that it was disgusting, so that he wouldn't have it. It might be what your girlfriend has been taught.

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Ok, I need some advice. Just words of wisdom to help me out. My ex boyfriend wants to get back together with me, but I am having a hard time trusting him and understanding him. So, I am going to let you read an AIM conversation between us and let me know what you think. Ok? Just give me whatever advice comes your way. Here it is:

Before you read it: Cory left me back in January for a girl named Allyson who is in California. He even went to see her over the summer. WE are in Indiana. Cory is in college and I am taking the semester off to work and be with family after the breakup. Cory was cheating on me with Allyson (telling her that he loved her and had already dumped me) for 4 months before I found out. He says he fell in love with her! He told me that he never loved me like he loved her and all of that. I was devastated. He and I had been together for nearly 3 years!!!!! Well, now, they are over and he has come back to me. He wants me back and is asking for my trust and wants me to be with him. we even made out a week ago and it was AMAZING! But, I can't seem to let the past go. Just read this. Now that you have a little background, you should understand!

Me: Hey baby! How are y?ou
Him: fine
Me: you ok?
Me: busy?
Him: a little
Me: Hmmmm
Me: who are you talking to?
Me: Laugh out Loud
Me: Just kidding
Him: no one
Him: working on this song
Me: Cool Beans Batman!
Me: My hair is BLONDE!
Him: ok, good
Me: you didn't like it dark?
Him: not really
Me: Laugh out loud, ok
Me: Well, its like almost white
Me: Kinda hard to get used to
Him: we'll see
Me: Ok
Me: I found some old pictures of us on a CD
Me: I ripped all of the paper ones
Him: ok
Me: Sorry!
Me: Did you take Allyson's pictures off your phone?
Him: no, just like i didn't take yours off my computer
Me: Hmmmmm....
Me: But hers are Nasty cause she is a whore and all and if you want to forget her, then why keep them?
Him: she's not a whore, and i'm not going to put up with that (insert my name here)
Me: ?
Me: with what?
Him: i am not going to put up with you bad mouthing my ex
Me: And I have reason to NOT do that?
Him: you'll lose some of my respect
Me: Well, ok, I wont bad mouth her, but, um, why keep the pictures?
Him: i want to remember
Me: you want to remember leaving me and hurting me?
Him: i want to remember her, and california, and the good times we had
Me: Why? Why does it mean that much to you if you are over her?
Me: I will tell you why, cause you still love her, and want her, and you dont love me, you only want me cause you and her are over. I am just a rebound! You dont regret ANYTHING that you did at all. You dont even think it was wrong, do you? I get it now!
Him: o my god, i am not going to put up with this shit, night
Me: I am not trying to be rude, I am sorry
Me: I am just hurt cause I see it now
Him: no, you don't
Him: cause that
Him: that's not it
Him: i am tired of your jealous attitude
Him: just fuck it
Him: forget everything that's happened the past couple of weeks between us
Him: bye
Me: How can I not be jealous? You left me for her.
Me: Sorry!
Him: do you WANT to lose me again, cause you are going to..
Me: I am sorry, what is it that I dont understand then?
Him: i just want to remember her! christ!
Him: jesus FUCKING christ
Me: Well, ok, but how would you feel if I had half nude pics of Nick on my phone and would not delete them? I mean, others, ok, I can see that.
Me: Is this really what you want? : forget everything that's happened the past couple of weeks between us
Him: it seems to be what you want
Me: No, it isn't Cory!
Him: then just shut up about the past
Him: i am not going to talk about it anymore
Me: I WANT YOU! But, I cant help it that I am jealous of her, Cory! You cant expect me to just let it go whenever it was something that hurt me as much as it did. You just dont undertsand that.
Me: And I am sorry that you dont want to talk about it, but talking about it helps my insecurities
Me: Talking is what we have to do to fix the problems
Him: well, i just don't want to talk about it
Me: So, you don't want to fix my insecurities? Cause thats about the only way
Me: I mean, you couldn't have expected this to all be easy? I thought we agreed to fix things together. Remember? You even said "Then let me heal you" when I told you that I was still hurt. And, I am!
Me: I can't help that.
Him: i'm just busy, and i want to just forget everything from before
Me: Then why r you mad at me
Me: ?
Him: i'm not
Me: I think you are
Me: I was just trying to talk to you and you blew up. AGAIN
Me: ?
Him: i'm just writing this music
Him: it's star wars
Me: Ok
Me: Well.....
Me: ?
Him: wanna hear it so far?
Me: Cory, I love you sweetie and I want to be with you again and make this work, but your always blowing up on me. And I am sorry that I am insecure, but I NEED YOU TO UNDERSTAND AND HELP ME WITH IT!
Me: Sure
Him: just a sec then
Me: ?
Me: you calling?
Him: yes
Me: You dont sound to happy to talk to me when you call
Him: i am just preoccupied here
Me: ok, so, back on the subject......
Me: Like I said:
Me: Cory, I love you sweetie and I want to be with you again and make this work, but your always blowing up on me. And I am sorry that I am insecure, but I NEED YOU TO UNDERSTAND AND HELP ME WITH IT!
Me: Thats EXACTLY how I feel
Him: well, not much i can do, you just have to get over things, and give it time
Me: get over what?
Him: the past
Me: and what about you blowing up on me?
Him: just cause i am busy
Me: Ok, well, I guess I can try to be more understanding about that, but you need to try not to
Him: ok
Me: But, you already said to foget everything, so.....
Me: and you said that I was going to lose you
Him: just stop
Me: ?
Him: i'm going to bed
Him: i'm tired of this tonight
Me: Ok, well, did you mean what you said?
Him: no
Me: If so, just tell me
Me: Ok, then, why did you say it?
Him: just tired of talking about all this stuff
Me: O My God! I am doing it AGAIN! This is what drove you crazy last time. I nit pick! Every word you say
Him: yeah, exactly
Me: UGH! I am sorry!
Him: going to bed
Him: to bed i said
Me: Laugh Out Loud
Me: Well, Sorry!
Him: night, love you
Him: night
Me: Just give it time, I will stop being so stupid!
Me: And I love you too!
Me: gnite
Him: is away at 11:14:18 PM.

Let me know what you think!

He sounds like a loser. He doesn't love you. It doesn't sound like either of you knows what love is to throw it around like that. If he cheated on you he doesn't love you. Maybe he loves the sex, maybe he loves the attention, maybe he loves thinking about all the good times- but he doesn't love you. Visa versa, you don't love him, you just hate yourself. You are thinking that you didn't have something that made him go elsewhere and that's why you want him back, and want him to appologize and tell you that he was wrong. But even if he does tell you that he didn't mean it, he did. He was wrong, and most likely will tell you that he was wrong, but even if he says it, it doesn't mean anything. The fact is that he lied and broke your heart and that should be the end of it. I've been there. You must be around 14 or 15. Well, I'm 20 now, and if I look back at those situations there was no love, it was all lust, it was all about insecurites and making him want you to prove to yourself that you are 'wantable'. This is not the way to do it. You should love yourself, and not need a guy to tell you that you are beautiful, because you should just know that. Plus, in your question you made it sound like he wanted to be back with you more than you wanted to be with him, and from your conversation it makes it sound like you are beggin him back to you. Stop talking to him and be over with it. He doesn't respect you, and you aren't respecting yourself to even consider going back with him.

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i've been with my boyfriend for over a month and he still hasn't kissed me? i'm his first real girlfriend so i don't think he's ever kissed anyone before. he also still has braces and he's really insecure about them. he desperately wants to get them off and talks about it all the time. do you think maybe he could be waiting for that to happen? that would suck. how can i hint that i want him to kiss me without coming right out and saying it (that would be weird!)?

Kiss him...

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what is the best way for love to happen? i've heard that love for sight is just lust. i think love is build on friendship, is this true?

Love is the kind of thing that has no rule book. Love is random, like most things.
I wouldn't think too much about it because there are no answers.

*as an added note, what attracts people to oneanother is sight, how else would you know you were attracted to them.*

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ok this is really worryin me my g/f is in middlsboro with her mom 4 the summer there is alot of boys that like her up there. i mean yea i trust her and all but i rlly dont kno what 2 think about all those boys can any1 help me????

If she cheats- then she's not worth it.

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alright my boy friend has some issues and i dont know wat to do about it . He has a problem in figuring out who he wants to be . He sed one day that he wants to be gothic but then he changed his mind and i cant stand all the pressure of worrying about him all the time . I realy love him and i dont know wat i wud do with out him but im tired of waiting on him to figure out who he wants to be and im scared to break up with him cuz i love him so much . Wat shud i do?? -worried

Sounds like you boyfriend doesn't have issues. I have a closet full of clothes- everyday I dress like I feel- goth, punk, skater, prep, etc. I've been doing it for 7 years, and I don't think I have issues, I think I'm creative and real with myself. If he's doing it to make a statement, then maybe he has issues, but I wouldn't bother with it. You should try it too.

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im 19 m and my gf is 18 and 7 months pregnant..shes emotional as hell and cries all the time..even when im with her..im away alot cus i play baseball and thats what i do for a living and she understands..waht can i do to makes her happy? please help me..thanks

Pregnancy is a crazy time. I know a lot of single mothers that are all like 22, so woo. Anyways, your girlfriend is on an emotional and hormonal rollercoaster right now. I would see if there is anything on the market for such a thing, something natural and wouldn't affect the baby. Really, just be there for her. It's a really normal thing to be a basket case when you are pregnant, so be understanding. Plus, I know there are a lot of books on pregnancy and hormones, you should check it out- their experts. hope this helps.

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I am in love with this guy. He is my ex-boyfriend and he broke up with me for reasons that no longer exist. Well, I love him and he's in love with this girl. She's in love with someone else and is in a serious relationship with him. My ex is really unhappy. He helps those two see each other as often as they can and he takes the noble way. He told her that he loved her and she ran away. In fact, he's only told two people "I love you" and they both have run away. He has this large void that needs filled. His mother is dead. And his father doesn't see him. He lives with his Aunt and Uncle. I wish there was something I could do to make him happy. He knows I love him and that I'll always be there for him. He just doesn't love me. I'm not trying to get him to love me, I just wish there was something I could do to make him happy. His happiness is the most important thing to me. He poured his soul out to me last night and we cried together for two hours. I know he likes me. I mean what guy stares at the front door when you go inside for an extra few minutes and doesn't care about you. Everyone also thinks he's using me. I don't think he is because he still has some feelings for me. I mean we hit 2nd base last weekend (my first time) and we made out a lot. I want to know where do I go from here. I wish I could fill that void in his life because I would do anything for him. Is there someway that I could help him get this girl to love him or for him to get over her? What can I do to help?

This guy is the first of many. If you don't understand that people come in and out of your life very easily- then life will be hard. You should take your friends advice, they are most often the ones that see what you don't - "ie. him using you." It sounds like you are having trouble drawing a line between lust and friendship. You can care about him, but if he doesn't treat you well, which it looks like he doesn't, then 2nd base means nothing. Get out of there girl he is not doing anything good for you.

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so i want to impress this guy at schol so how should i waer myhair? i have light brown hair that goes up to my ribs, i have long bangs, and it is layered

If he likes you, he will like you however your hair is. Don't try too hard because he's not worth it if you have to go out of your way to impress him. Love yourself the way you like yourself.

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why do parents always say "your not in love its just puppy love" how the hell do they know i mean they arent you and all that and just because they didnt find love and all that at the age of 15 and 16 doesnt mean that others cant sometimes people do find love right? that just gets on my nerves so much when my mom does that

Love is something that no one actually knows. In this country you're lucky to find true love, because as we have seen there are too many people that think they are in love, get married and then divorced. Love is something that everyone is constantly figuring out, so neither you or your mother are right... to each his own perception of the world and one's relationships.

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